Chapter 29 - Why Pretend?

"Mmm. I like these."

Fitz's deep baritone appears next to Olivia's ear as he comes to stand behind her in their bedroom. She feels his warm hands slide around her sides, slip beneath the high waistband of the maternity jeans she's trying on, finally settling over her baby bump. It's grown significantly in the two weeks since Thanksgiving, but he can still cover it with his palms - just.

She gazes at him in the mirror, giggling at his reaction. "Really?" she asks in disbelief. "You like the pouch?"

In response he stretches the dark blue material outwards, forming a space which she will eventually fill. She looks down, trying not to be too alarmed by just how much room there is for her tummy to expand. Forty weeks seems even more distant than usual.

"Mm hmm," he murmurs, his lips brushing the spot on the side of her neck which is always guaranteed to make her melt. "I love the pouch. I don't know why, but you wearing these is… seriously sexy."

Apart from the jeans, she's just in her bra. Apart from his towel, freshly-showered Fitz is completely naked - and most definitely aroused. Awash with pregnancy hormones she has yet to learn how to control, Olivia's body reacts to him in the only way it sees fit: total surrender.

"How long until we have to leave?" Her voice is already so breathy, she barely recognizes it.

"That depends." He's caressing her bump in slow circles now, his erection rising against her lower back. "Are you going to speak to your dad before we go?"

She gasps when he lifts one hand to squeeze her breast, his thumb bringing her nipple to attention, sending streams of the sweetest pleasure straight to her core. Suddenly, she's on fire.

"I really don't want to talk about my father right now."

"You might regret it if you don't," he cautions, continuing his torture with her other breast. "Once we're in public, that's it. We can't take it back."

"I know."

He stops what he's doing; kisses her shoulder before meeting her eyes in the mirror. "As long as you're sure. I'll do whatever you want, beautiful."

"I'm sure. It'll be fine."

"Okay."

He spins her in his arms. She catches the briefest glimpse of his irresistible smile before he's kissing her, drawing her against him, guiding her towards to the bed.

Twenty minutes later, lying on her back and waiting for her heart to stop pounding, Olivia turns her head to the side and contemplates all the brand-new maternity clothes spread across the floor. She'd ordered them online under a different name and they arrived just in time, because apart from leggings, none of her pants fit properly anymore.

"I guess I'm keeping the pouch jeans then," she says as she looks at Fitz again, her smile both amused and thoroughly satisfied.

He looks serious as he leans down and presses his lips to her belly. "You'd better. Plus, you're gonna need them soon enough, for our little joey."

She combs her fingers through his hair and sighs, utterly content. Tonight, on the eve of her fifteenth week of pregnancy, just twelve days before Christmas, they are going out in public together for the first time in over a month - and, most importantly, with the intention of being caught on camera. It's all been planned with Harrison, whom they met with shortly after their return from California. This evening, they'll be photographed as part of a group on the red carpet outside an exclusive event at the Rockefeller Center, hosted by Alicia Keys and her foundation. Harrison has sent an anonymous tip to one of the gossip blogs that Olivia Pope's new man is attending the party with her, ensuring that she and Fitz will be spied upon all evening. The idea is that a few candid shots of them standing close, laughing together, acting like a couple but with no overt PDAs, will appear in the media the next day.

With the rumor stoked, over the next week they'll be seen together a few more times - and then Christmas and New Year will distract the world's attention away, and hopefully they'll manage to avoid the revelation of their relationship becoming a huge deal. Olivia thinks it's a great plan. In fact, she's so in love with Fitz, with being pregnant, that there's only a very small part of her left which still cares what people will think - and even that is disappearing by the day.

There are only two things left to consider, once they're out in the open: firstly, her father's reaction and secondly, the timing of their baby news announcement. She still wants to wait awhile longer, mainly so she can figure out how to tell her dad first but also because she thinks the optics will be better if Fitz is already divorced. The good news is, he finally has a court date. When they'd arrived back in New York, he'd logged in to his personal email account to find a message from his wife. Olivia remembers sitting beside him on the sofa, hearing him swear under his breath and asking what was wrong. He'd read a few lines of the email out loud to her, seemingly stunned:

I'm sorry for the way I behaved, Fitz. You didn't deserve any of that and I sincerely apologize. I don't know if this will help make amends, but I've pulled some strings to try and bring our court date forward. The waiting list was three to four months. With Christmas coming up, the best I could do was January twelfth. I've said we'd be available at short notice for any cancellations before then. Also, the only copy of the photos is on a memory stick which I'm sending to you at your office by courier, on Monday next week...

"I was actually going to email her," he'd admitted. "Just a brief apology so I could live with myself after some of the things I said to her. Life's too short to hold on to bad feelings, you know? I couldn't decide what to write, but she's made it easy now."

Thank you. I'm sorry too.
Fitz.

Then he'd closed his laptop and pulled Olivia into his arms. "How many days until January twelfth?" she'd asked in a small voice.

"Too many," he'd sighed.

"I know. At least it has an end date now though, right?"

He'd looked deep into her eyes, tracing her cheekbone with his fingertip. "Oh Livvie. It had an end date the moment I met you."

She hadn't stopped kissing him for a long time, after that.

With regards to her father, she'd been planning to reveal Fitz's identity to him before they went public - but she hasn't found the courage. She was even supposed to see him this morning but she cancelled at the last minute, using Abby as an excuse, pretending her friend was having some kind of crisis. Despite Eli's good behavior when they last met for breakfast, Olivia can't bring herself to believe he's really changed so much in such a short space of time, and she's so happy at the moment she doesn't want anything to rain on her parade - not least her judgmental father. Also, while she does feel bad for letting him find out about Fitz from the media and not from her directly, it's a small rebellion on her part: to show him that she's an adult, and she doesn't have to live her life by him all the time.

Still, she knows time is running out - something Fitz keeps reminding her of.

"Baby," he says now, running his soapy hands over her in the shower after their lovemaking. "You are going to have to tell him soon. You can't hide this much longer."

She hasn't 'popped' yet; her bump is still a rise from her pelvis to her belly button, instead of a rounded shape, but it's so obviously a pregnancy instead of excess weight. In public she can disguise it beneath sweaters and coats but it will be a lot harder when she has to hug her father, to spend time with him.

"I will." She links their fingers and looks up at him, the hot spray hitting their skin where her chest meets his. "I'll visit him this week and I'll tell him all about you. He'll probably have seen you in the media anyway. And then, once he's had a bit of time to process that news, I'll tell him about the baby too."

"And if it takes him a long time to process?"

She shrugs, smiling. "I'll avoid him for the next six months and you can call him when I'm in labor."

Fitz raises an eyebrow. "I know you're joking, but I can also kind of see that happening…"

"Don't tempt me."

He rests his forehead against hers, holding her close. "He'll be fine, I'm sure. Every man wants to be a granddad - look at my dad. He was a terrible father and yet he actually cried when we told him."

"Mm. Maybe you're right."

"Maybe I am. You won't know if you don't test my theory."

Olivia stands on her tiptoes to kiss him, wanting this conversation to be over. She knows exactly what she has to do; it's just the doing it which is hard.

"Can we forget about this, just for tonight?" she asks sweetly, in the voice she knows he can't refuse. "I want to get dressed up and flirt with you outrageously in public."

He makes a contented noise deep in his throat, his lips ghosting over hers. "Okay. You know, I've been dreaming about this for weeks now. I'm gonna make you crazy, baby."

"Not if I make you crazy first."

Their kisses become more heated, her nipples hardening against his chest. Before she gets too carried away though, she manages to step back.

"Tease," he mutters, hitting her bottom as she exits the shower.

"Oh, you can't handle it?" She makes absolutely no effort to cover herself up, standing dripping wet on the bath mat, pouting at him. The way his gaze devours her bare body makes her tremble in anticipation. Tonight is going to be so much fun.


Fitz has already seen his girl glammed up on several occasions but she has never looked as sensational as she does right now, checking herself over one final time in the mirror before they leave for the party.

It could be the little black dress she's wearing: the top half is sequined, long-sleeved and cut low to show off her phenomenal breasts; the waistband sits just beneath them and then the plain skirt flares outwards, a 'tulip' as she calls it, ending midway down her smooth thighs. "It's all about distraction," she'd explained, turning this way and that in her five-inch heels. "Drawing the eye to my boobs, my legs, and away from everything else."

He certainly agreed with her: he was already so distracted he almost wanted to cancel the whole evening, to keep her here in this bedroom all night long.

But more than just her appearance - and she looks so beautiful, with huge curls in her hair which she's pinned back from her face, coupled with shimmering eyes, cheeks and lips - he's overcome with the knowledge of their secret; with the thought that they'll be surrounded by people and no one else will have a clue what's beneath her dress. It's thrilling. In fact, more than that, it's arousing. He's turned on by the very idea of his pregnant girlfriend hiding in plain sight.

And he tells her, in the back of their chauffeur-driven car. Her dark eyes, her sexy smile, show him she feels the same way; as does her hand sliding down over his abs, his belt, rubbing him through his pants. He groans. Her smile becomes truly wicked as she leans over to whisper in his ear: "Am I winning yet… Baby Daddy?"

She's never called him that before. In combination with everything else, it's so erotic it makes his blood boil.

"Oh," she sighs a second later, just as Fitz is trying to decide what to do about his predicament. "We're here."

Sure enough, the car is slowing. She bites on his earlobe and tugs with her teeth, running her fingers over his rapidly-hardening cock one final time. "Down boy," she murmurs, clearly knowing her words will have the opposite effect. Fortunately, their plan was always for him to exit the car five minutes after her, something he's desperately grateful for right now.

As the driver gets out to walk around and open Olivia's door, Fitz knows he has moments to get revenge before she leaves. He slips his hand beneath her skirt, his fingertips grazing so lightly over her sensitive clit, making her gasp.

"I will touch you when we're in there," he says softly, a threat of the best kind. "I'll find a way, don't you worry."

She shivers. He moves away as her door opens, smirking at her. For the first time ever, she shows him her middle finger, and his laughter follows her out into the cold Manhattan night.


Fitz hangs around at the edge of the red carpet in his tux, watching Olivia being interviewed and photographed. There's absolutely no reason to suspect she's pregnant although it's blatantly obvious to him that her boobs are bigger, despite the cut of her dress which somehow manages to disguise that fact.

After a couple of minutes, she's managed to form a small group of celebrities and their partners. They're chatting animatedly, intermittently posing for the paparazzi. When she turns to him and beckons him over to join them, the huge smile on his face is entirely natural because it's suddenly hit him just how fucking lucky he is to be with this woman, this goddess. It's almost enough to make him kiss her when he gets to her side but he manages to resist, instead nodding politely to the others as Olivia introduces him as "my friend, Fitz Grant".

They have several shots taken together, the flashes blinding. Then everyone disperses and Olivia beams up at him, acknowledging that the first part of their plan has worked. He follows her into the venue, noticing her wave to several other photographers on the way past. Not for the first time, he's struck by how natural she is at this.

"That went well," she says, leaning in close. They're both offered Champagne at the entrance, which she takes; Fitz requests a sparkling grape juice instead. Covertly, they swap glasses and then toast, their eyes alight with love, with exhilaration at finally being out together.

"So, who do you know here?" he asks, looking around the lobby. He recognizes several faces from music, television and film.

"Danika," she replies, spotting a young African-American woman who beckons her over. "She's an amazing blogger. Come on, I'll introduce you."

It turns out Danika is lovely, as are her girlfriends Mary, Lauren and Dami - but they're all very nosy. Within no time at all they're grilling Fitz on his love life, on whether he's single.

"I'm afraid not," he admits, forcing himself not to glance at Olivia, to give their game away so soon.

"Are you married?" Lauren asks directly, eyeing his left hand which he holds up, confirming the absence of a wedding ring.

"Divorced."

"Oh. What happened?"

"I fell in love with someone else."

It's not strictly accurate - he would have divorced Mellie eventually, even if he'd never met Olivia - and he knows she knows that. But he wants her to hear him declare his love for her in front of four strangers; to hear those words out in the open. He hopes listening to them feels as good as saying them, because his heart is singing right now. And he thinks the same is true for her: he's still not looking at her but he can sense her breathing quickening, her eyes fixed on his face.

"Shame," Lauren goes on, unaware of the rising tension between them. "We could have set you up with Liv. She's single. And hot."

"I've noticed." Now he does look at her, his gaze intense, the corners of his lips turned upwards. "She's beautiful."

He can't help it. Everything he feels for her is contained within that word, within the tenderness of his voice. Suddenly the air is charged; electric. He's too busy watching the gorgeous blush that blooms on her cheeks to notice how the other women react.

"Oh my god," Danika exclaims, eventually breaking the stunned silence. "You two are dating! Tell me you're dating this dreamboat, Liv? Because if you're not, you should be!"

"Would you just excuse us a second?" Olivia murmurs, taking hold of his arm and ushering him quickly away from the astonished group.

"Too much?" he asks, walking close behind her.

She shakes her head, leading him towards the bathrooms, out of sight of the lobby. In the corridor outside, which is deserted, she finally looks at him - and she's smiling so hard. "I loved what you said," she tells him quietly, lifting her arms to his shoulders. "I just had to get away from there to stop myself jumping you."

He laughs, his hands resting on her hips. "So we're ten minutes in and I'm already winning - is that what you're saying?"

"Hmm. No."

She's so cute when she's trying to look defiant that he throws caution to the wind and kisses her, just once, his lips lingering there for as long as he dares.

"Oh god," she breathes afterwards. "I'm so horny, Fitz."

She actually looks like she's contemplating leaving but he knows how important tonight is to their grand plan, and he's not ready for the fun to be over just yet.

"So am I," he confesses. "But we can do this, baby. Let's just spend a little time apart, okay?"

"You don't know anyone though."

He gives her his most charismatic smile. "I've been making friends for forty years. I think I've learned the art by now."

She squeezes his hand, unwilling to let him leave. He kisses her knuckles, her fingertips; places them on her belly. "Come find me in a while, okay? And don't worry. I won't stop thinking about you."


This is just like the night they met: they can't stay away from each other. In the hour of mingling before dinner is served, Olivia keeps turning away from one group of people to find Fitz is in the next, already the center of attention, telling anecdotes which have his audience in stitches. His warmth and charm positively radiate from him and she knows without a shadow of a doubt that he's going to make an excellent and well-loved politician one day.

She's cornered by Danika in the ladies' room, who demands to know the deal between her and Fitz. "We are seeing each other," she confirms, her voice hushed. "But it's not public yet, okay?"

"Okay. Ah, this is so exciting! Tell me everything."

Olivia gives a very brief overview, being vague about dates, about how long they've known one another. She hates lying - it makes her feel so uncomfortable - but Harrison convinced her this was the best way. And it seems to work, because Danika is enthralled.

"God, the way he called you 'beautiful' - I've never heard a guy say anything with so much feeling before. Never."

"He's… pretty special," she says with a smile, catching her friend's eye in the mirror as she checks her makeup.

"And he said he's in love with you." Danika sighs. "Are you in love with him too?"

"Yeah." She can't stop smiling now. "I am."

"Aah!"

She's enveloped in a hug, one she quickly has to escape for fear of her friend noticing the new shape of her abdomen.

"Wow, Liv. I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks. Shall we get another drink?"

"Absolutely."

Fortunately, she's spared the pretense of ordering a glass of wine by the announcement of dinner. She and Fitz are seated together on a table with a bunch of writers and actors; he flirts with her incessantly, both in front of everyone and quietly, in her ear, as his hand disappears beneath her skirt, stroking her inner thigh. It's more than enough to keep her desire simmering, especially when John Legend takes to the stage and begins to perform. In the dark, Fitz moves his chair next to hers and, gradually, Olivia lets her head come to rest on his shoulder. At one point she thinks she sees a flash and she hopes it's someone taking their picture, capturing how close she feels to him in this moment, listening to love ballads and identifying with every single word.

After that, a DJ takes over. Knowing Fitz's aversion to dancing, she's content enough to stand around chatting some more, making acquaintances. By now, his palm is permanently resting on her lower back and whenever anyone asks, she admits that they're dating. It's coming out in the media tomorrow anyway, Harrison is making sure of that - so why pretend? Being honest about it is so liberating, there's a permanent smile on her face.

As time passes, just like her Fitz is becoming more carefree. At one point he draws her close and kisses her temple; several times during a conversation she feels his hand slip lower, to squeeze her ass. He's moved on to drinking scotch now, which she always finds so sexy: the sight of him holding the tumbler with his strong fingers; the way he watches the amber liquid swirl around as he listens to a joke someone is telling, his rich laugh already building in his chest before he looks up, makes eye contact with the comedian, shows them his appreciation. And the smell of scotch is so him, because she's never dated anyone before who drank it; never tasted it in anyone else's mouth, never had it breathed over her most sensitive parts by anyone except this man - her man.

And those thoughts, memories, sights and scents are stoking her desire for him, building deep inside her, warm and heavy and starting to throb between her thighs. She presses herself closer into him and she knows he can tell. He once said he could read her like a book, and it's true. She can't hide anything from him - especially not the way her body responds to him. He's an expert in that above all else.

"Can we go get another drink?" she asks him during a pause in conversation.

He doesn't even hesitate. "Yes, of course. Excuse us."

At the bar, waiting for two glasses of water, he stands so near they're almost touching all along their fronts. "Livvie, this is torture," he says, his voice strained, and she knew he was getting turned on too but she didn't realize just how much. "I'm dying to tell everyone that I'm madly in love with you; that right now, my baby is growing inside you."

In the dim light, partially hidden by his jacket, he reaches out his index finger and brushes it against her belly. She looks down, her breath catching in her throat. It's such a small gesture but the meaning behind it is astronomical. When she meets his eyes again, she wonders if she looks as aroused as he does. It must be a close call.

In that moment, she decides that all bets are off.

"Let's go home. I can't wait any longer."

"Are you sure we've done enough?"

He's referring to their plan, to sowing the seeds of rumor. "We've done more than enough. I'm pretty sure this entire room knows about us now."

"And you're happy with that?"

He's so caring, so keen to make sure she has everything she needs. "Fitzy, I'm so happy. I've had an amazing evening." She closes the gap between them, wrapping her arm around his neck, speaking with her lips almost brushing over his. "Now I want you to peel off my clothes, to kiss me all over. I want to taste the whiskey on your tongue; to feel it inside me. I want to-"

But she doesn't get to finish because he's ravishing her, a raw and bruising kiss which leaves her longing for more, and then he's pulling her by the hand, straight towards the exit - so quickly they're almost running.


In the same private car they arrived in, completely separated from the driver, Olivia is trying her best to stay quiet but it's so, so difficult when her legs are spread and Fitz's head is beneath her skirt and he's doing exactly what she asked: burying his whiskey-flavored tongue inside of her. Her fingernails are clawing at the leather seats, lifting her hips to grant him better access, helplessly rocking her pelvis in rhythm with her building climax, with the strokes of his tongue, the way he sucks her pussy into his mouth, his teeth grazing her clit, hands massaging her aching breasts, his groans which vibrate all the way through her-

"Fitz."

It's a hiss because she's about to come and she just needs- just- a few more- seconds-

"Oh my- fuck! Fuck, oh god."

She bites her own arm, something she's never done before but it's the only way to hold in the explosion, to stop the driver worrying that she's being murdered back here. Fitz keeps lapping at her, waiting until she's completely spent, until she eventually has to push him away and he reappears from underneath her skirt looking thoroughly pleased with himself, licking his lips. She's so dazed she can barely keep her eyes open.

"Baby," she whimpers, leaning against him when he's seated beside her once more. "That was… so good."

"I could tell." The car slows. "Perfect timing," he adds, amused. "I know you want us out there, but I don't think a photo of me going down on you is the best way to reveal ourselves to the world."

Somehow, her sated body manages a laugh. She just about manages to compose herself before the chauffeur is opening her door, helping her out onto the sidewalk by her apartment. She tips him and hears him drive away before she realizes.

"Shit, my underwear! I left-"

Fitz pulls her lacy Brazilians from his pocket, smiling mischievously at her. "Now my super sexy girlfriend has two secrets hiding beneath her dress…"

He stands behind her, his hand splayed on her abdomen, his mouth warm on her neck. Even though they're alone on the street and it's bitterly cold, it's so thrilling to be here beneath the stars with him.

"Maybe," she suggests, tilting her face to look up at him, "We should go inside and you can take it off me?"

"Oh baby. I thought you'd never ask."

He bends down suddenly and lifts her, one arm beneath her knees, the other under her shoulders. Her cry of surprise rises into the night, blending into the sounds of the city where somewhere, a gossip blogger is sitting at their computer, already sharing photos of Olivia Pope and her new man…