The next day
I had a show in the afternoon and came home right after and Em and I hung out and just did our usual thing. I had noticed how Emily had been acting rather odd all day, in the bathroom a lot and silent. She hadn't been throwing up, I knew that and I started getting worried and I was about to get a whole lot worried.
"Hey honey, is everything alright? You haven't been acting like yourself today." I say as I sit down on the couch next to her in the living room and I turn off the telly. She doesn't answer me and just intently stares down at her belly.
"Emily?" I say.
"I think something's wrong with the baby, it hasn't been kicking a lot today." she mutters quietly looking up at me and I see the ever present worry and concern in her suddenly sad eyes.
"Let's go to the hospital then." I say trying to sound calm and collected but my heart is suddenly beating rapidly and I'm sure my blood pressure just spiked. We get our jackets and I just in case grab an extra set of clothes for both of us and we leave and get in the car. I could barely pay attention to the road, Emily beside me and my thoughts with the worry that's set in and how i'm suddenly afraid for the baby's life, bringing back too many familiar feelings from when we almost lost the baby in August. We ride to the hospital in silence as i'm trying but failing at collecting my thoughts and Emily is again looking down at her belly intently. We arrive and talk to the front desk in the ER and they immediately get a room for Emily and I follow her, she changes into a hospital gown and a nurse comes into the room and puts a clothe strap around her large belly to be what I assume is something to measure the heart rate of the baby. While all of this happened I'm in panic mode and pacing around her room and trying my best not to freak out and cry.
"Is the baby okay?" I blurt out to the nurse as she's looking at the fetal heart monitor as Emily sits there looking terrified and emotionless.
"It has a very low heart rate at the moment." she announces and I nod slowly. I make eye contact with Em and she looks scared beyond belief and I wonder how I look, because I feel like my world is about to fall apart. Emily's eyes are empty and sad and I smile weakly at her and I see tears start to leave her eyes and I rush to her side and sit by her on the bed and pull her into my arms.
"The doctor will be in shortly to see you Ms. Smith." the nurse says and leaves. I feel Emily nod into my neck as she's crying hard into my neck and I keep telling myself not to cry and I can't keep it in anymore and i soon enough burst into tears as my arms are around Emily and our faces in buried in each others necks.
"Paul, what if the baby doesn't make it?" I hear her mumble into my neck the question that has been running through my head for the past half hour.
"Let's not think about that now, Em." I say trying to sound hopeful.
"Paul, we have to think about that now!" she protests and I pull away from the hug and look at her.
"Well I don't want to talk about it!" I say angrily since I'm so attuned with putting a guard up. She covers her face with her hands and continues to cry and I sigh and wrap my arms back around her.
"I'm sorry darling. I just don't want to think that thought." I admit quietly and she nods into my neck.
"It'll all be okay, Em. Whatever happens I'll make it be okay." I say hopefully and she nods believing me and I kiss her head repeatedly. I pull away from the hug and sit in the chair next to her bed and she rests to reduce stress that will negatively affect the baby. The doctor soon comes in and checks the monitor and charts and medical stuff telling him whatever it is about the baby's current condition as Em and I sit there in silence, tightly holding hands as we nervously and impatiently await the news about the health of our unborn child.
