Penitent 29
We have spent the night in one deserted town after another. We have hit a main road, a highway. For hours we have walked along, scaring up crows at one point, large inky black birds which have left us unsettled as they've come too close, squawking at us, reaching for our heads with wicked talons. It is what they represent-the fallen ones, that leaves us alarmed. Emmett takes several of them out with a sling he's fashioned. He never misses, but then they are so large, so close together.
Edward hits them with his stick, his blows just as efficient. With each swing he gets a kill, sometimes two.
Alice and Rose take care that none land on the babies, or close to me at all. Zane is frantic from their attempts to wing close, from their furious calls. He seems to be trying to answer them in some crude way. He grows so energetic that Rose must take him. Her strength is almost no match for his agitation. When he squirms he is hard to hold onto, and must be carried in a sling. "He would fly at them…or with them," she says.
The crows badger us all morning long, never learning from the littered black and bloody trail that lengthens behind us.
"The infection draws them," Edward tells me. "They are hungry, and it's in me, it's in us all to some degree."
"Even the others?"
"Watch how they spread over us, not preferring one over the other. They sense it. The environment has tainted us."
"Will we die?"
"We have never died before, but then, this is a life we've not known on many levels."
"You're avoiding the question," I asked, my short steps not enough to keep abreast of him."
He slowed then, lifted Amuel from my arms. "We do not die easy. Garrett was destroyed. So we learn. You know you've become more like me. The children…we do not yet know. But one thing is clear…we are more hearty than humanity has proven to be. We have survived."
"Did you destroy Garrett?"
I had seen him that night, swinging from Garret.
"I am responsible."
"But did you do the actual…."
"It was done because of what I allowed. But not directly by my hand, tainted as it's become.
"I spoke the truth to you," he paused to strike at the birds, bringing down three, "when I said I was cutting him down. I was in a rage….those who have fallen feed…as you saw them do with me in battle. They pile on and…."
"We will not speak of it ever again," I say. It is as if the conversation draws the crows more forcefully than ever.
"I let his blood be upon me," he says, grunting as he swings his stick with fury and speed. The birds rain down then. I put my hands over my head as they fall around me. Then, "Sing," Edward commands, and the guard sings, at once, in harmony, loud and clear, and the birds seem to answer it, squawking louder than before, as if they call others, and they multiply into a black roof of feathers and talons and noise.
Rose had dropped to one knee to shelter Zane with her body. "Bella," she calls to me, for the baby has become so frenzied, he makes a horrible sound, his eyes rolling back in his head, a crescent of white foam at the corner of his mouth. He twitches and writhes, and she lays him on the ground and throws herself over him.
I don't know what to do. Edward is battling, as are all of the guard. Only Alice, who is also on the ground, shielding Amuel. "Bring him to me," I cry to her.
She runs to where we are, crouching low to keep herself curved over the baby. The others fight, and sing louder. I take Amuel as Alice strikes at any of the crows who dare to drop too close. I lay him beside Zane. Zane twitches still, but with less violence. In less then a minute, he does not twitch at all, and I find his soul in his eyes once more as he looks at me, an other-worldly look. I wipe at his mouth and speak his name, but it is Amuel, turned now on his side, his small fists moving against his brother's arm.
The crows are rising. I can feel their heavy shadows lifting from us. Zane has turned toward his brother. They look upon one another's faces, and their fists touch as they move their arms in the way of infants.
Edward's shadow falls upon us now. I do not have to look. "Amuel is his light. It is not you to such a degree…it is not me…it's Amuel."
That night we sit under a tree wrapped in one another's embrace. Our sons lay side by side two feet away. "Then they must always stay together," I say to Edward.
"They already know their need of one another. It's a unity. You would call it a bond."
"Will they always agree?"
Edward pulled me as close to him as possible. "They will often not agree. They will work from two different perspectives. But they will love one another fiercely."
I put my hand against his soft beard. His eyes glitter with emotion for me, for our sons. "We were meant to be. They…are meant to be."
He kisses me so slowly, with reverence. His hand also cups my cheek. "Nothing that comes from you can be bad," he whispers. "Love is the strongest force. No matter how high evil rears its screaming head…love is an unstoppable river. Everything else is temporary. Everything else self-destructs."
"Are you betting on our sons?" Me.
He strokes over the side of my hair, all the way to its tips, his hand caressing my breast. "I'm betting on love."
