"Both of them speak of something that is gone:
…Whither is fled the visionary gleam?
Where is it now, the glory and the dream?"
- from "Ode: Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood", William Wordsworth
Chapter Twenty Nine
July the Twelfth, Nineteen Hundred Ninety-Five
To say that Sirius Black loathed the house at Grimmauld Place was an understatement. Even if he were paid, he would rather have had his stomach ripped out by a raging Hungarian Horntail than to be trapped inside these walls again, and yet here he was, in the very home he had been desperate to get away from. He would never go so far as to say it was as bad as Azkaban - but it was rather close.
As much as he tried to keep busy here, the only thing that gave him any significant amount of relief was fire whiskey and mulled mead - often at inappropriate morning hours, at the realization the he had absolutely nothing better to do. Hence, when he was sitting in his room and overheard the rest of the members of the Order of the Phoenix discussing what seemed to be a very dangerous, very important mission, he had no hesitation in stepping out into the living room and throwing his hat into the metaphorical ring.
"What are we all looking at me strange for?" Sirius guffawed as he took a seat next to Remus Lupin on a sofa, propping his Wellington-clad feet unceremoniously onto the table - when he entered the room, everyone seemed to have fallen into an awkward silence. Everyone glanced at one another uncomfortably, except for Severus Snape, who gave Sirius a nasty grin.
"We all know how hot-headed you are, Black," he said coolly, crossing his arms. "And I don't believe this particular assignment is -- suitable for your temperament."
"A handful of Aurors have been kidnapped and are being held hostage," Remus interrupted in order to avoid a fiasco of a confrontation between Sirius and Severus - even after so many years, the animosity was still as potent as ever. "We aren't sure if any of them are still alive, but to date, no remains have been found and --"
"Why would I lose my temper over a bunch of Aurors who probably helped keep me in Azkaban to begin with?" Sirius snorted derisively, shaking his head. "Frankly, if I wasn't itching to get out of here I couldn't give a --"
"They were some of our Aurors, at a satellite outpost in Bulgaria. They've been there for the past ten or eleven years," Molly Weasley added in a gentle, knowing tone. Like a hound called by his master, Sirius stiffened, bristled, and turned quickly to Molly.
"Have any of them been identified? The missing Aurors?" Sirius asked, lips tight against his teeth as he leaned across the table. Everyone shook their heads in response. His nostrils flared furiously. "And no one told me before --"
"I think," Tonks piped in, still in a surprisingly chipper tone, "that they thought you'd muck everything up if you came along, because all you'd care about is finding your girlfriend --"
"Tonks!"
"Shut up!"
"But it's true!" Tonks retorted shrilly, holding her hands up defensively at the sudden outcry at her incredibly blunt statement.
"I don't care if it's true," Remus chided pointedly. "We've all been trying to --"
"ENOUGH!" Sirius bellowed, effectively silencing everyone as he slammed a fist onto the wooden table like a judge's gavel. He cleared his throat, and feigned a cool smile, an almost convincing imitation of himself in his youth.
Ever since Sirius had been freed and rejoined the ranks of the Order, he had asked everyone what had become of Davina Maddux - all anyone was able to tell them was that about a year after Sirius was put in Azkaban, a year of trying to convince everyone that Sirius was innocent, Davie had given up and asked to be sent to Bulgaria to get away. Remus, in particular seemed rather shifty and guilty - all he cared to explain was that his last conversation with Davie had been less than pleasant, and she had never replied to any of his letters attempting to make amends - indeed, she made contact with no one, and no one could blame her after the way they had treated her like she was insane. For all any of them knew, she had disappeared.
Sirius leaned forward onto the table coolly, glad to have the entire room as his captive audience. It felt quite natural, actually. "You all ought to know I'm always ready and willing for a field trip - when do we leave?"
"You can't be seen outside of the house, you ignoramus --"
"Who asked you?" Sirius snarled again, eyes narrowed in Snape's direction, feeling another familiar sensation boiling to the surface, an anger and resentment at Snape's interference with things - with people that Sirius wanted him to be completely detached from.
"Sirius," Arthur Weasley said carefully, though he flinched quite visibly when Sirius' head practically snapped itself off his neck to turn in his direction. "You can't leave Headquarters. I know you mean well but it may endanger --"
"Alright. S'fine." Sirius snarled, eyes narrowing as he slammed a fist on the table and stood up, staring at everyone in the room as though they'd just betrayed him - he spared a very particularly scathing glance for Severus Snape. Had things changed so much in fourteen years that suddenly, everyone sided with Snivellus over him? That even Moony refused to speak up for him? He stormed back to his room, not bothering to acknowledge the nasty grin on Snape's face at defeating him yet again.
Sirius had to keep himself from ripping the wallpaper from his walls in his fury when he heard the loud cracking noises that could only mean that the group had apparated away without him. Indeed, Sirius only managed to calm himself when he was joined by Buckbeak striding into the room from the adjacent quarters, his sharp talons scratching on the ground - Sirius managed to bow as he was obliged to out of respect, and the restraint the action required allowed him a small amount of cooling-off.
"Good Buckbeak," Sirius said gruffly, reaching out to pet the hippogriff firmly after he had received a reciprocal bow. "At least someone in this bloody house is loyal."
Sirius had in recent years acquired, among other things, the ability to brood in complete silence for long periods of time, and he did precisely that until he heard a loud crackling noise - not the sound of apparition, but of a message coming in by Floo. That was the good thing about this old house, Sirius thought to himself. The walls were so old and thin, at the very least, the rest of the Order was unable to hide things from him. The next sound he heard was the click of Molly Weasley's shoes across the hard wood floor to answer.
"Arthur!" she said loudly, evidently surprised at being contacted in this way. "Arthur, where are you?"
"Bulgaria, as planned," Arthur's voice came over the crackling fire. "The mansion was abandoned before we arrived, but it isn't a pretty sight. It was practically in ruins. We have one survivor --"
Sirius rose from where he'd been sitting and moved to the door to eavesdrop, almost unconsciously.
"--we're returning with her now. Be ready to have a look at her."
Her. At the mention of the others' return, Sirius scrambled carelessly from his quarters, just in time to see Arthur Weasley return, followed immediately by Remus, though neither of them had in tow the aforementioned survivor - had he been hearing things?
At that moment, as if in response to his silent question, Severus Snape appeared in the room next, bearing an unconscious human form in his arms, though the figure was covered by his traveling cloak. Sirius rushed forward as Snape placed the body in the closest armchair in the living room. Remus leaned over and brushed the hair out of the figure's face.
It was most definitely a woman - a petite, dark-haired woman who looked hardly any older than thirty years old. Her hair was caked with dirt and dried blood which probably came from the wound visible on her scalp. Her face was pale, emaciated, almost grotesquely sickly - and yet somehow absolutely unmistakable.
"Davie," Sirius said in a choked voice, causing everyone to note his presence, and the room became incredibly still, unsure of whether to restrain him, or to let him near her. A vein at the side of his neck throbbed visibly at the thought of the fact that Severus Snape had been the one to find her when she needed to be saved - the unfairness was excruciating, that Snivellus had done what in their youth Davie had never allowed Sirius to do. Sirius scrambled over, nearly knocking a table out of the way in the process. He knelt next to the unconscious woman - the movements of her chest caused by her breathing were almost intangible; for a moment, Sirius was not sure she was breathing at all. "Is she -- bloody hell, if you had let me -- I thought you were going to --"
"She's alive, Padfoot," Remus explained, pulling Sirius backwards in order to try and talk sense into the man who look almost animal-like in his desperation for Davie to awaken. "But she's been tortured, badly -- there's no way of telling for how long unless she wakes up."
"Until she wakes up," Sirius corrected without pause, not able to take his gaze from her. "Remus, don't bloody make it sound like she won't --"
"Look at the poor thing," Molly Weasley interrupted dotingly, clucking her tongue reproachfully in wordless reprimanding for Sirius' reaction. "You all remember how skinny she got when her parents died. Merlin's sake, she's ten times worse. We need to bring her to St. Mungo's --"
"She's staying here," Sirius said, jabbing a finger downwards forcefully. "She's in my home and I refuse to allow her to be put in that -- that --"
"Are you a Healer, Black?" Snape snarled. "You don't even --"
"We can't trust anyone else with her," Sirius retorted, his attention turning onto Snape once more. "D'you think she's any safer in St. Mungo's? I think I know --"
"You hardly know how to bathe yourself, you imbecile --"
"I'll kill you," Sirius snarled, pulling his wand from the pocket of his coat. Snape had calmly just done the same when a small, piteous groan rose from the maroon chaise.
"Where am I?" came the almost inaudible female voice - she frailly lifted her hand to shield her still-shut eyes from the light, after having been in the dark for so long. When she moved, her paleness became even more evident; there was hardly any difference between her lips and her skin. The only clear bits of color were livid bruises on her face and arms. After an audible gasp, Molly left to the kitchen to fetch the supplies to tend to the woman.
"Where am I?" Davie repeated, her eyes still shut - the pain in her head throbbed at the sudden exposure to light. The first thought that came to mind was not of being rescued, but of being taken somewhere else for further torture. "Let me go --" Davie groaned hoarsely. "Let me --"
"Davie," Remus said quietly, raising his hand in front of Sirius to silence him for the time being. "You're back in London - you're with the Order -"
"The Order," Davie said breathlessly, her forehead wrinkling in recognition. "It's true then, you've regrouped -- I -- I don't --"
"Can you tell us what happened?" Remus asked. He attempted to place a hand on her forearm gently, but upon the brief physical contact she immediately drew away, as quickly as her weak limbs would allow.
"How do I know you're not lying?" Davie asked, her voice laced with a sort of suspicion that was unfamiliar to all of them. It seemed so unlike her to be so cold and untrusting - at the moment, she was simply an Auror, and not their Davie. "Where's my wand?"
"Picked it up near you," Remus said, pulling a wand from the pocket of his tattered cloak and laying it on Davie's stomach - at this, she seemed to relax greatly, though not completely. For a moment, Davie's fingers curled around her wand, examining it as well as she could without opening her eyes until she was satisfied that it was really hers.
"How do I know you're not using a Polyjuice Potion? They do come cheap these days," Davie said in what was as scathing a tone as she could have managed, and everyone understood, with the previous year's occurrence with Barty Crouch Jr. posing as Mad-Eye Moody and infiltrating Hogwarts for the entire term. "Prove who you are."
"Well-trained. You're an even better Auror than any of us had ever expected," Remus said, unable to restrain a chuckle at Davie's impeccable obedience to the tenets of Aurors' Practices. "D'you remember fifth year, when you refused to dance at the ball, and stormed off when Sirius --"
"Asked to borrow me for a dance," Davie said with a weak exhalation that was as close as she could manage to laughter - the coldness in her tone seemed to wane as she felt more secure that she was among friends. Meanwhile, Sirius' demeanor shifted visibly, but it was also clear that as he grew more and more anxious to speak with her himself, he was less and less willing to Remus hushing him.
"The Ministry in Bulgaria - the resident Seer warned all of the Aurors of a hostage situation in the mansion," Davie explained in a slow, hoarse voice. "We didn't know that it her vision involved us being the hostages - we were set up -- where are the others?"
"Dead."
"Severus?" Davie said in a near-wheeze when she recognized the voice - Sirius bristled at having beaten by Snape again. "They can't be -- there were ten of us --"
"Six mauled beyond recognition, one beheaded, two killed after excessive exposure to the Cruciatus, and," Snape said bluntly, "you."
Davie was silent, and Molly Weasley settled near her, looking scandalized by the ease with which Snape was recounted the circumstances of Davie's rescue. "Davina? Dear --"
"Molly," Davie said with a deep breath, a smile trying to work its way onto her face. "Molly, is that --"
"What's ailing you, dear?" Molly asked, dabbing at the woman's face with a washcloth.
"What isn't?" Davie retorted with a frail chuckle. "The Cruciatus, more times than I can count -- haven't eaten in about a week -- my head --"
"All can be remedied," Molly said gently, touching her wand to the wound on Davie's scalp
"Where is the Order hiding?" Davie asked breathlessly, "Does Dumbledore know I'm here? You can't risk your safety bringing me here without --"
"The Order's relocated to Grimmauld Place - you're safe here," Remus explained. "We have plenty of wards in place." And then, he moved aside slightly, as if he had already foreseen the way her brow would furrow in recognition.
"Grimmauld Place - is it --" Davie said as her breathing began to steady to an almost normal rate, and she started attempting to open her eyes despite the throbbing pain that remained. "This place belongs to --"
By the time she had managed to open and focus her eyes, Sirius had nudged his way past Remus, situating himself directly in Davie's line of sight -- her voice cracked, and she fell silent, staring at him in near-confusion. With all that the years had done to them all, she nearly failed to recognize him, but those grey eyes --
"Who did this?" Sirius insisted, leaning anxiously over the woman in a manner that seemed to startle her. "Davie, who did this to you?" She looked away from his intense gaze before she answered in an avoidant manner that was all too familiar from their years at Hogwarts, from the years Sirius spent dealing with her unwillingness to be seen with him. All too familiar.
"The Bulgarian ministry --" Davie said in a confused, choked voice as she shook her head as much as she could without provoking an even worse headache. "Death Eaters --"
"Which?" Snape interrupting, hovering stiffly at the rear of the chair in which Davie was lain. "You're not making --"
"You don't understand," Davie hissed, eyes narrowed in determination to get the statement out despite the fact that she was completely exhausted. "The Bulgarian Ministry - it's already been taken. That's the reason they've been trying to slaughter all of the Aurors our ministry sent there."
"Of course," Snape said, raising a hand to his forehead in trying to reconcile how he did not know. The other occupants of the room turned to face him at one of the rare instances where he did not sound condescending. "You can no longer return to Bulgaria --"
"Obviously," Davie interrupted with a shadow of a smirk.
Everyone in the room gave a mild chuckle, save for Severus, who tensed and looked quite tempted to roll his eyes. Clearly, even now, many things about Davina Maddux remained the same - her snark, her attitude - but it did not go unnoticed that she seemed to be barely clinging to consciousness. Molly retrieved a plate she'd brought in on the tray and help up a slice of toast slathered in cinnamon and pineapple jam. Davie took it, and despite being on the verge of starvation, she ate gingerly in wariness of being watched by everyone.
"I'm alright," Davie insisted, once she was able to lift the goblet of pumpkin juice steadily on her own. A bit of color had returned to her cheeks in consciousness of all the eyes that were on her "You don't need to do all this --"
"After over a decade," Snape interrupted. "You have gotten no less stubborn. One would think that they'd eventually have beaten it out of you."
"If they'd beaten the stubbornness out of me, I'd be dead," Davie said matter-of-factly.
Sirius broodingly noted Davie's inability to meet his gaze for any significant amount of time. Silently, he conjured up a pair of cushions and laid them near where she sat, then stormed silently back to his own room, leaving the others to continue their interrogation of her.
Remus noted the way Davie stared wordlessly at Sirius as he left, and he placed his hand on hers with a knowing expression, which was shared to some degree by the other inhabitants of the room. The last time they'd all spoken, things had been very different. Sirius was not aware of the way Davie had been the only one in their midst to think he was innocent, the way they'd all alienated her for it. He was unaware of what Davie had been through for his sake, and was at the same time, hurt by her cold reception.
"Always did take you both a bit of time to come to your senses," Remus said encouragingly, giving Davie's shoulder a small squeeze - she flinched slightly, feeling slightly strange being back among everyone again. "But it always happened in the end."
***
A/N's
Ah! I know everyone wanted to know what exactly Davie did after she left Azkaban at the end of the last chapter, but that part is revealed bit by bit in the next few chapters.
Certainly not the romantic reunion one would have hoped for, but that's what makes for good drama, isn't it? Anyway - we have a new story arc to follow! In a couple of chapters, we'll also see Harry and the others, though I'm still working on that chapter.
I received a very prompt review from d12hpfan, less than half an hour after I posted the last chapter, asking if there would be a sequel. I don't think the ending I have planned for this story necessarily is conducive to a sequel, but I also have been playing around with a new idea of an AU story in which Davie says yes when Sirius first proposes, and they have a child who participates in the storyline of the HP series - I've been doing a little bit of brainstorming and quickwriting, but I'll wait to gauge interest in it before actually going anywhere with it. To lilmisspurpleshinee, I cried writing the last chapter! It was such an intense scene, I just hope the big scenes in the future can live up to it. Also, thanks to Ithilya, Wateranddarkness666, dancingqueensillystring for reviewing! I always love hearing back from everyone! And also to another returning reviewer, Angel-son of Caesar, who wondered why Andromeda was cleaning Tonks up with a napkin since she was a witch after all. I figured to characterize them that way since Andromeda married a Muggle, she'd have picked up doing some things the Muggle way as well.
Thank you to Padfoot'sPixie, dolphinlover101, AdaraBlackPotter and ApollosBaby for favoriting/subscribing.
Lots of feedback on the last chapter, it really helped me get through yet another rough week at school. Sorry again for the delay, hope no one thinks I've forgotten about writing! Next chapter, we'll see an actual conversation between Davie and Sirius, but not the joyful, tearful reunion you may have been hoping for. Until then, cheers!
