Chapter Twenty Nine - Hasegawa the Hinata Housemaid

"I quit."

Daichi frowned but remained calm. He carefully removed the cigar from his mouth and placed it on his silver ashtray. It seemed Daichi valued his cigars more than the people working for him, or perhaps in his opinion, the people beneath him. The thick smell of smoke filled the small room, and it was a scent nauseating for anyone not used to the taste of cigars. In the corner was a regular sized plant pot, though the plant itself had seen better days. The plant had wilted, showing dismal colours of brown and yellow.

"And why do you wish to do that, Hasegawa?" He asked.

From her pocket, Chisame withdraw a rolled up copy of the latest edition of 'Play: Planet XZ'; a magazine that specialises in reviewing games for various computer consoles. She whisked through the magazine until she found the page she needed. With righteous power, Chisame slammed the open magazine right in front of Daichi's eyes.

"Must be quite an achievement to obtain a score below zero." She uttered venomously.

With disinterest, Daichi skimmed through the review, looking at the score from the game courtesy of Star Rock Enterprises. After avoiding some heavy criticism, his eyes glanced at the big red numbers. Minus fifty percent.

"So it was a flop." Daichi said as he shrugged. "Not all games we make have to be successful."

Chisame continued the conversational warpath, and pointed to a specific section of the review. "Just listen to this part. 'Graphics and sound aside, Karate Destruction's key flaw is the near inability to execute special moves. Take character Karate Danny for instance. To use his special move; the flying uppercut, you have to hold down four buttons and rotate the control pad 360 degrees. By the time you even attempt that, your opponent would have smashed you in the face a billion times.' Well how about that? I could have sworn I said something along those lines… oh wait I actually did, didn't I? Every game you've given me I've criticised, but all my opinions have been utterly ignored. I'm sick of this bullshit."

Daichi closed his eyes and slowly began to clench his fist. "Hasegawa…" He started to say, but Chisame was far from finished.

"Oh, and what do you mean by 'not all games we make have to be successful?' Do you even care about the games your people design? Of course you fucking don't! You're just in it for the money! You're just a fat, pompous, bigoted…"

Daichi finally blew a fuse. He slammed both hands on his worktable, causing his ashtray to flip upside down.

"THAT'S ENOUGH HASEGAWA." He roared. "GET OUT. YOU'RE FIRED. I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOUR FACE EVER AGAIN."

Chisame did not flinch, nor make any kind of nervous reaction from Daichi's outburst. Instead she took it all very professionally, because deep down, she knew she was far superior to the man who obviously cared about nothing but his own presence. Chisame simply turned the other way and walked four paces towards the door.

Daichi relaxed a little, taking another puff on his large cigar. "Let that be a lesson to me. Never let a girl do a man's job." He muttered.

Chisame stopped walking. She overheard his words. Part of her wanted to walk on and forget what he had said. Part of her didn't.

From the main workplace, everyone stopped their game testing the second they heard a sickening crunch, later heard by a massive thud. When Chisame opened the door, everyone quickly reverted to their computers, none of them uttering a single word. When she was out of sight, one staff member cautiously entered Daichi's room, carrying with him a report summary. When he peeked inside, the man found out that Daichi was slumped in a corner whilst wearing a plant pot on top of his head.

"I'll call back later." The man decided to say.

Chisame impatiently waited as the lift took her to the ground floor and reception. When the metal doors slid open, Chisame promptly stormed out, not even bothering to speak to the female receptionist. She forced the main door open, and at last was greeted by a welcoming breeze of fresh air. The cool air caressed her face, though failed to sooth her anger.

"That prick Kentaro has gone missing for weeks." Chisame grumbled to herself. "Probably off on another vacation, using daddy's money again…"

On the other hand, Chisame was quite relieved not having to see Daichi's son around. Chances are Kentaro would have made a few smartass comments about her departure, and chances are Chisame would have broken him in seven places, starting from the neck.

Chisame looked up at Star Rock's logo. Shiny, golden words were placed on the very top of the tall building. Though she had only worked there for two years, those two years felt like forever. She remembered the day she applied. After her interview, it took nearly three weeks before a letter was sent to her, saying she was successful for the job. After hearing the delightful news, Chisame thought she had her life made. A well paid job and a future to look forward to.

Only after working for a month did Chisame realise she was going through a daily nightmare. The receptionist was an android. It seemed like the young woman was programmed to say three lines; 'good morning', 'how was your day' and 'see you tomorrow'. The actual workplace was often overheated, thanks to the many computer consoles for each cubical, and the lack of air conditioning didn't help the situation either. The men Chisame worked with were sexist pigs, always treating her like she was the missing link. The working hours were dreadful, and Daichi would even demand Chisame to work on some weekends if need be. And of course, there was Kentaro, the self centred piece of shit who she couldn't stand. To make her job even less satisfying, Chisame wasn't even issued with her expected salary, being paid considerably less than what it was supposed to be. After that first month, she had complained about her wages, but even after so much time, her salary remained the same. It was after that first month her life started to deteriorate, fragment by fragment… until she reached the point where she finally had to let go.

Now she was free. Free from the stress, the anxiety and the humiliation.

As she walked and waited at the train station, Chisame wondered if her revenge was satisfactory. Sure, she did a number on her ex-boss, but now she desperately wanted to acquire a crowbar and unleash hell on everyone who bothered her at work… which, to sum it up, was pretty much everyone.

Chisame sighed and noticed the cool air turning into a cold crisp one. The train announcement alerted her senses, informing everyone within earshot that, due to a technicality, all trains for this station have been cancelled for the remainder of the day. Chisame groaned and decided to phone for a taxi instead. After one phone call, Chisame waited and waited… tapping her foot as she did so. At last the taxi arrived, one hour later than expected. There was not a grunt of apology from the driver as Chisame opened the cab door.

-0-0-

The heating system filled all of Hinata-Sou with a relaxing warm air, so it seemed somewhat ironic when Makie, sitting on the living room couch, was shaking like a leaf. After the Toudai festival, three weeks have passed by, and for Makie, it was the longest three weeks of her life. Today she had recently finished her final entrance exam, which happened to be mathematics, her least favourite subject. She had to wait until the end of August to find out whether or not she made it through. She would hate to fail, especially because her failure would be sure to disappoint Keitaro. After all, it was Senpai who helped her study, every weekday and every weekend. Any free time Keitaro had, he devoted to her.

She jumped as she felt a hand gently press against her shoulder. She tilted her head up and looked at Mana's smiling face.

"Stop worrying, you'll do fine." Mana said reassuringly.

"Yes, I'm sure you'll pass."

Now Mana jumped as Yue literally popped up from behind the couch. How Yue could appear from nowhere was still a mystery to them. Yue paced around the living room as she proceeded to speak her mind.

"They say lots of great things happen if you manage to get into Toudai. They say you'll make lots of friends and create happy memories, and your chances of getting married will increase to one hundred percent."

Makie began to smile, soaking in all of Yue's positive information. "Really? That's great!"

"On the other hand." Yue interrupted, lifting a finger up in the air. "Should you fail, they say you will live the rest of your life single and decrepit, and no one will ever fall in love with you, and all of your hopes and dreams will be crushed, crushed like a giant hand crushing a can of coke. You will be dissolved into nothingness, thus making your life an eternal void… …but hey I'm sure you'll pass."

As Yue walked away to her room, Mana looked at Makie one more time. Now Makie was on the floor in a heap, white as a ghost.

Mana sighed and made her way to the kitchen. "I'll get the dinner ready." She decided to say.

After ten minutes, the manager opened the main door and walked into the dormitory, wiping sweat from his forehead after another hard working day.

"Good evening Keitaro!" Mana called out.

"Good evening Tatsumiya-san!" Keitaro replied.

"I'm making a prawn salad, and it should be ready in about twenty minutes!"

"Sounds great! You're making me hungry already!"

After some walking, Keitaro stopped and looked at the nervous wreck, centre of the living room.

"Um… Makie-chan? Are you alright?"

-0-0-

As the sky turned dark, the weather remained a cosy warmth. The hot springs were still, save for the occasional light breeze rippling the water. Even in darkness, Hinata-Sou was the majestic dormitory the residents knew and loved. Every window shone with a yellowy brightness…

-0-0-

"Do we have to wait for grumpy grouch?" Pouted Makie. The more she looked at her food, the more she wanted to eat it.

The manager and residents sat around the table, all of them waiting for a certain redhead to show up.

"She shouldn't be much longer." Keitaro said to Makie. "Though she's never usually this late."

"Perhaps Chisame is working overtime?" Mana spoke her mind.

"Yeah… you're probably right." Keitaro replied. "Okay, let's start eating."

"Yahoo! Itadakimasu!" Makie declared, shovelling down the food with her chopsticks. Yue quickly followed suit, and soon afterwards so did Mana. Keitaro sighed before slowly lifting a rogue prawn from a nest of lettuce.

The girls and Keitaro nearly finished their dinner when they heard the sound of the main door, opening and closing in a careful manner. This action caused Keitaro to tense up. Already he sensed something was wrong. Every weekday, Chisame would nearly destroy the main door, blasting a verbal outburst of how badly her day sucked. It was her small way of unwinding before calming herself down. Tonight, Keitaro found her silence… a little unsettling.

"Well look who decided to show up!" Said Makie, as she finished off her last piece of tomato.

Keitaro looked up at her. They all did. Keitaro braved to say something. "Hey Hasegawa-san, how was your day?"

He regretted the moment those words came out of his mouth. Chisame looked at the empty chair, followed by the food presented for her arrival. Lettuce, tomato and cucumber surrounded the plate in an elegant pattern. Inside the circle of salad were many pink, succulent prawns, some small, others big, all waiting to be eaten.

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to have an early night." Chisame decided to say, leaving the food on the table and walking away to her room.

Mana rose from her seat and collected the empty plates. "I'll leave your dinner in the fridge if you want it later." She said.

"Thanks Mana." Chisame replied as she continued her path towards a much wanted solitude.

-0-0-

The door closed behind her. The jacket was promptly removed and flung onto the bed. The shoes were kicked off from her feet, landing with a soft thud near the wall. With those cumbersome objects out of the way, Chisame collapsed into her swivel chair and instantly switched her laptop on. Chisame had plenty of days when she was absolutely livid, but never a time did she suffer in silence. It was a rare feeling for her. She didn't feel like squeezing a stress ball, or squeezing Mosquito's neck.

Chisame plugged her earphones in her laptop and began to listen to a vast selection of her favourite music, all downloaded from CD to hard drive. She stood still as she listened intently to the first track, then the second, then the third. By the time she listened to track four, a hypnotic mesh of music engulfed her mind. Right now, reality could pack its bags and leave for all she cared.

She logged into her website and smiled at all her messages. Thanks to her tour of Toudai, she had received even more messages than ever before, further reinforcing her number one spot as the Internet idol. Even Kenichi (who was dumb enough to post his real name on the net) gave her a quick reply, as well as Tenma (see previous brackets) and a few other people, some more well known than others. Some fans wanted to know if Chiu was going to make another live performance. When she read those kind of messages, Chisame lowered the volume coming out of her headphones. Now the only music in her ears were her thoughts. People liked her, not only because she was young and attractive, but because she was a genuinely kind and lovable girl. Without properly realising it, Chisame had achieved a new wave of popularity.

Her life was a coin, a different picture on each side. One picture showed misery, torment and anger. One picture showed happiness, colour and joy.

Chisame browsed on her website for over half an hour, but was still nowhere near reading all of her messages that were sent today. The glowing screen did not help her tired eyes, especially since all other lighting was switched off. Sleep got the better of her. She closed the laptop, undressed herself, and ploughed into bed, silently thanking Keitaro for not interrupting her.

-0-0-

Though already late at night, Keitaro, bare foot and in his pyjamas, walked over to Chisame's door. He was about to knock on it, but something inside him stopped him from doing so. He decided in the end it would be best to resolve this problem some other time. A time where, hopefully, Chisame would have made an increased recovery.

-0-0-

"Alright, alright I'm up." Chisame groaned, hearing the inferno noise of her alarm clock.

Pushing the off button, Chisame rolled out of bed and slammed face first onto the cold floor, an action which, in honesty, proved far more effective than any alarm clock. Now fully focused she removed her red pyjamas and replaced them with her usual working uniform; shirt, slacks, shoes, jacket and of course her glasses being the universal requirement. She also remembered a few other belongings she needed, money for transport and food being the most essential. In a record breaking three and a half minutes, Chisame was all set and raring to go… well maybe not so much raring to go, but she was still ready. She opened her door.

There were two reasons why Chisame froze at this point. One… Saturday. Unless requested, Chisame never worked on a Saturday. Two… she quit her job, and the truth didn't properly sink in… until now.

Feeling a chill in her stomach, Chisame carefully closed her door again, sitting down on her swivel chair when she did so.

"Oh yeah…" She whispered to herself. "…I don't have a job anymore…"

-0-0-

Keitaro was sleeping peacefully, until the sound of something quickly stirred him awake. He muttered a few incoherent words before rising from his bed, embarrassingly wiping some drool from his mouth. Perhaps he was dreaming about eating Mana's delicious prawn salad… or perhaps… he was dreaming about eating Mana.

"Oh God! I'm so sorry for possibly dreaming about Tatsumiya-san!" He said aloud.

He then shifted into sub consciousness. Mana Tatsumiya. Preparing dinner for him… wearing nothing except for an apron that read 'EAT THE COOK'.

"OH GOD! WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT THIS KIND OF STUFF?!" He clutched his head and shouted, snapping back to reality. "I know I was with Haitani and Shirai for the duration of the festival, but that shouldn't mean I've caught any of their perverted DNA!"

As he said those words aloud, Keitaro knew he lived in a placed called denial city. Since the festival, every night Keitaro has dreamt of perverted dreams, mostly involving the residents, sometimes involving other girls. One time he dreamt of Takane Goodman wearing a dominatrix outfit and wielding a whip enhanced with fire. There were others etched into his mind as well, but Keitaro quickly got himself ready before he could delve deeper into his perverse mind.

Fully clothed and ready, Keitaro walked into the hallway. He could hear those sounds again, louder than before. They were coming from the kitchen. He could hear spits of fire and plates and cutlery being assorted.

"Tatsumiya-san? Is that you?" He softly called out. No reply. Perhaps Mana was too busy to hear anything, or perhaps Keitaro wasn't loud enough. "Hmm… I said I would prepare breakfast tomorrow…"

"Morning Keitaro, is something wrong?"

Keitaro spun around to see Mana standing next to him.

"Tatsumiya-san! Morning!" Keitaro greeted, though still a little freaked out.

"You're preparing food early." She said. "Couldn't sleep?"

"Huh? No, I haven't started. To be honest I thought you were in the kitchen…"

A tired Makie and an even more tired Yue made the group into four. Unlike Mana and Keitaro, they were still in their bed wear.

"What's going on?" Asked Makie as she wiped away some sleep from her eyes. "What's with the noise?"

"Hmmm." Keitaro thought as he regarded all the possibilities. "Well, let's see. It's early in the morning, the four of us are in the hallway… and there's a sound coming from the kitchen…"

He thought long and hard… before slamming a fist in his hand.

"…yes, I know exactly what's going on…"

Everyone looked at him for the answer.

"…WE'VE GOT INTRUDERS IN OUR HOUSE!!"

Makie gasped. Mana's eyes widened. Yue blinked.

"Right! I'm going to take them out!" Keitaro decided. "If I could nearly defeat Kenichi, then I should have no problem defeating… whoever it is that needs defeating!"

Mana blocked Keitaro with her left arm. "Wait Keitaro!" She whispered sternly. "Have you properly thought this through?"

"What do you mean?" Asked Keitaro.

"They could have firearms."

"Firearms?! Oh God! No way! Murderers in my dormitory?!"

"Oh no! I don't wanna die!" Makie wailed.

"Is this a dream?" Thought Yue.

"Settle down! I'll handle this, you stay there and protect Makie-chan and Yue-chan."

"Okay!"

Mana stealthily ran into the dining room and the kitchen. She quickly unsheathed three silver daggers, each one resting in between her fingers. She was just about to launch the weapons at her intended target, but froze dramatically. It was unusual to see Chisame up this early on a weekend. It was extra unusual to see Chisame using a frying pan. Chisame was wearing an elegant blue and white maiden outfit, and her red hair was tied up with a scrunchie. Of course, she had to wear her glasses to avoid suspicion… even though Chisame preparing breakfast in a maiden outfit held enough suspicion already. Chisame turned around the moment Mana concealed her blades. She addressed her with a big smile.

"Morning Mana!" She greeted with a sing song voice. "Lovely day isn't it?"

Mana was lost for words. Keitaro and the others rushed to the scene of the crime, surprised they was no crime… but quite a scene.

"HOLY CRAP!" Keitaro pointed and shouted. "Glasses and maiden outfits… it's like something straight out of a Hentai movie! Ah, not that I watch or read any of that kind of stuff!"

"Woah Chisame-chan! What's with the getup?" Asked Makie.

"Well…" Chisame replied. "…I've lived here for about six months now (six months too long) and I thought I would treat everyone to breakfast this morning! Hope everyone likes fried fish and onigiri!"

Everyone noticed Yue suddenly awake and rummaging around open cupboards and drawers. "Has anyone seen Chisame anywhere?" She asked.

…and so moments later, the three ladies and Keitaro all sat around the table in the dining room, waiting for Chisame's ready made breakfast. Makie leaned over and quietly voiced her opinion.

"Pssst! I don't know about you guys, but I reckon she is up to something…"

"Maybe she's had a change of heart?" Mana theorised.

"She doesn't have a heart!" Makie argued. "Or a soul for that matter."

"I agree with Tatsumiya-san." Keitaro added. "Sometimes when you have a certain person figured out, they can do something completely out of the ordinary! There was this one time where I was seven, and I wanted this really cool action figure, but my parents got me a woolly jumper instead!"

Makie made a confused face. "Uh… no offence Senpai, but that's kind of a strange example."

"What action figure did you want?" Asked Yue, completely missing the point of this debate.

"Oh… it was a Sailor Moon one." Replied Keitaro.

"You wanted a girl action figure?"

"No! I wanted one of the bad guys. Can't remember his name though…"

"Heads up!" Alerted Makie. "She's here! She's here!"

Chisame gracefully and carefully strolled into the dining room, carrying two trays with two plates on each. A plate of equal portion was handed over to all of the waiting people; first Yue, then Mana, then Keitaro and lastly Makie.

"Aren't you having anything?" Asked Keitaro.

Chisame smiled as she replied. "Oh I'm fine I've already eaten!"

Everyone looked at their food with a wide eyed expression.

"Well bon appetite!" Chisame beamed, bowing before returning to the kitchen. Possibly to clean up the mess she made.

What should have been on each plate were two tasty onigiris, complemented with a hearty, sizzling portion of fried trout. What was on each plate was a hellish, deformed hill of rice, and a melting, liquid like glob of brownness.

"Okay everyone, this looks like Hasegawa-san's first attempt, so let's give her the benefit of the doubt!" Keitaro whispered to everyone.

Makie raised an eyebrow. "As apposed to the suffering of the trout?"

"Makie-chan! (ahem) Anyway I'm sure underneath it all is a delicious meal waiting to be tasted!"

"Or deported." Yue suggested.

Everyone continued to stare at their food.

"I think we better use a spoon." Keitaro decided, to which everyone agreed unanimously.

In unison, everyone scooped up a spoonful of what used to be fish. They closed their eyes… and swallowed down the contents. Faces turned green.

"It has a… unique flavour." Keitaro thought.

"This taste is inhuman!" Mana summarised.

"Urk! Is she trying to poison us?!" Was Makie's opinion.

"Hmm… this doesn't taste half bad." Yue nodded to herself.

Chisame returned after cleaning the kitchen. "So what do you guys think?"

Eyes darted around. Hopefully if they waited long enough, someone else will speak aloud.

"It's… REALLY NICE!" Keitaro shouted all of a sudden. He gripped his spoon and shovelled down his food at a rate of knots. The food slid into the stomach the same way a jagged rock coursed its way down a sewer pipe. After emptying the plate, Keitaro stopped breathing, but after thumping his stomach a couple of times, that sudden problem was solved… though the dire taste remained. Mana and Makie looked at him with amazement!

"Wow, guess you were pretty hungry!" Said a happy Chisame.

"Uh-huh, uh-huh!" Keitaro nodded rapidly, tears streaming down his face.

"Well I guess you'll be wanting seconds then!"

"Huh?!"

In one motion, Chisame whisked away the empty plate, and replaced it with a bigger plate… filled to the top with an even larger portion of the same disastrous food. Keitaro grinned nervously as drops of sweat ran through his face. If Keitaro was a soldier, he would have received every medal awarded for courage that ever existed. With a shaky hand, he began to tuck into his second helping…

-0-0-

The Hinata residents were very surprised to see Chisame behave in such a way. They thought the breakfast 'treat' ended there, but Chisame elected to clean the entire dormitory head to toe, apologising when she smashed a few valuables in the process. No doubt this amazed the manager the most, since he would spend at least four hours a Saturday cleaning up the place. This left Keitaro with little else to do. He did the shopping earlier this week, so there was no sense in buying more than what was needed.

Saturday morning was a fairly lazy affair. Makie would normally hang out with her friends on days like these, but today her friends had plans of their own. Yuna and her father were visiting their grandparents and Ako had five a side soccer practice. With studying off her mind, Makie relaxed a little by listening to music and reading a few magazines. Keitaro and Mana were outside, spending most of their time training and meditating. Since her defeat during the tournament, Mana forced herself to fight more seriously against her unpredictable student.

Yue slumped against the corner of her room. So far Yue has read ten out of her 346 Manga comic books, all of which were won inside the Comic Convention Cavern. As well as her usual clothes, in her wardrobe were a couple of cosplay outfits, including the witch outfit with the pointy black hat. So far, there hasn't been an occasion where she wore them. She tilted her head when the door opened. Yue was a tad surprised to see Chisame enter her room, armed to the teeth with a feather duster and other cleaning equipment.

"Hi Yue-chan!" She sung again. "I was just dropping by to see if you wanted your room cleaning up!"

Yue curiously looked at her before giving an answer. "No, I'm okay thanks."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

"Really sure?"

"Really sure."

"Well, okay! Let me know if you change your mind!"

Chisame took one step into the hallway.

"Wait."

Chisame stopped like a statue. "Wow, she makes her mind up fast. Yes, Yue-chan?"

Yue said nothing but pointed to the opposite corner. Chisame's eyes followed Yue's finger, only now noticing Yue's room consisted of twenty percent bed, seventy six percent books, and four percent Yue.

"I want all my books piled up nicely… in alphabetical order."

Chisame's face became a picture, but she quickly shook her head and smiled again. "No problem!"

The minute hand on the clock moved its steady, circular journey. The living room was so quiet one could hear the repeated ticking sound coming from the second hand. Nearly half an hour passed by.

Back in Yue's room, Chisame had accomplished her first real task, which was a feat for her considering she doesn't do anything housework related during a weekend. She wiped some sweat from her forehead before feeling satisfied with the finished outcome. All books have been moved, altered and arranged in alphabetical order.

"Where's the door?" Yue asked.

"The door?" Chisame repeated. "What does she mean?"

As Chisame turned around, she realised there was no door, because the door was completely concealed with 346 Manga comic books.

"Oh." She said, wilting like a dying flower.

-0-0-

Lunch time… and everyone stared at the food handed to them, courtesy of a Hasegawa production. Today's poison this time was a fried chip sandwich. When it came to food, delicacy and preparation did not belong in Chisame's vocabulary. Inside the sandwich were three different kinds of sauces; mayonnaise, brown sauce and ketchup… all merging together into a delightful pinkish beige. The bread was already soggy thanks to the chips, so just holding the monstrous thing together was difficult enough, much less trying to eat it. This time Chisame joined the group, since she was as hungry as everyone else. At the same time, everyone bit slowly and deeply into the most unhealthiest sandwich in the world. Chisame narrowed her eyes and waited for their reactions. The suspense was hell.

"TOO SALTY!" Keitaro, Makie and Mana all shouted. They left the table in a blur and tried to drink as much water from the kitchen tap as possible. Chisame's eyes were fixated on Yue, the sole survivor of the four.

"So… what do you think, Yue-chan?" Chisame slowly questioned.

Yue's answer was not immediate. Her eyes moved from angle to angle as she contemplated this unusual tasting sensation. After swallowing her mouthful, she looked at Chisame, and gave her a big thumbs up.

Some sweat dropped from the back of Chisame's head. "I'm not sure whether Yue's approval satisfies or scares me."

-0-0-

Some time later.

"…and I also need the latest trance'n'dance album… oh! Can you get me a coffee flavoured milkshake from that really cool restaurant? Maybe a bag of banana flavoured sweets! I really like those! And another thing…"

Chisame lowered her jaw as Mosquito trailed off with an everlasting ammunition of words. "All I did was ask if she needed her room tidied up."

Chisame took this unlikely opportunity to scout around Makie's room; a comfy bed, a large florescent green beanbag, some exercise equipment, a few CDs scattered around, a swivel chair identical to hers and a desk which on top was a small stand-up mirror, a pink mobile phone, a brush and a book with a pink cover, labelled 'Makie's Diary'. By contrast, Makie's room was the complete opposite of Chisame's. It was bright, colourful and everything one would expect from a typical girl her age. Chisame thought Makie's room was too cliché and childish.

"Um… Makie-chan, I'm only here to tidy your room, okay?"

"Pfft! What sort of housemaid are you?" Makie huffed.

"Yeah… housemaid." Chisame replied, feeling the fire burn within. "Housemaid, by translation, means maiden of the house. A woman employed to do housework. Get it? Housemaid, however, does not translate into Makie's bitch!"

Makie looked at Chisame with big puppy like eyes. Tears were starting to swell up, and if Chisame wasn't going to act fast, she was going to be the first victim of a gigantic pink haired tsunami.

"Alright! Alright! But you gotta give me the cash up front!"

"Deal!" Makie said, who was faking the tears all along. "See you later, Housemaid-chan!"

Acquiring her jacket and a will to live, Chisame bid everyone goodbye before going outside.

"Okay, there is no possible way my day could get any worse than this." She thought, with extra pessimism.

-0-0-

…and it was not before long Chisame was walking in the city before venturing into a supermarket… well actually it was the third supermarket she visited. Chisame suspected Makie was leading her into a wild goose chase, because thus far she hasn't found a single bag of banana flavoured sweets. Bananas, yes, sweets, yes, but not banana flavoured sweets. She approached a member of staff and asked him if they had any around.

"Banana flavoured sweets? As in sweets that are…"

"Banana flavoured, yes." Chisame finished off his question. The staff member looked no older than eighteen, and his face was riddled with zits.

"…well… we have bananas… and sweets…"

Chisame smacked her forehead. "Oh for the love of…"

"HEY LOOK FUMIKA-CHAN! IT'S THAT WEIRDO WITH GLASSES!"

Confused and startled, Chisame turned her head around. Too late. Two pint sized girls ran manically towards poor Chisame and greeted the girl with a double flying kick to the face, which in turn caused Chisame to collide into the staff member, knocking them both out in the process. Thankfully the staff member's face didn't detonate.

"GOOD AFTERNOON WEIRDO WITH GLASSES!" The twins both chimed, staring down at a recovering Chisame with big wide smiles.

Chisame was in a kneeling position when she watched another Sasaki member run towards her; a gigantic pair of breasts attached to a very flamboyant woman. Miwa ran up to Chisame and gave her a big friendly bear hug. Guys were starting to stare.

"Hello Chisalami-chan! It's been a while since I've seen one of Makie-chan's good friends!" Miwa chirped.

Chisame couldn't reply because her face was crushed against two orbs of death. Miwa luckily released the hold, but then took advantage of Chisame's sense of decency… by squeezing her breasts like two plush toys. Guys were starting to take photographs.

"Wow Chisalami-chan! Your breasts have grown since I've last seen you! Mind you, you still have a long way to go to reach my size!" And Miwa indicated this by feeling her 'twins'… and the twins were feeling hers as well. In the space of ten seconds, all of the tissues and toilet rolls have been purchased from every man in the shop (for their bleeding noses, not… uh, never mind).

In a red haired blur, Chisame somehow managed to find the sweets and purchased them in an instant before getting the hell out of there.

-0-0-

After visiting the necessary stores, Chisame at last returned to Hinata-Sou, the place she knew and 'loved'. She stomped her way upstairs and dramatically pulled Makie's door open. Chisame didn't bother telling Makie that she visited her family. Just recollecting that memory made her feel… violated.

"So did you get the stuff?" Makie asked excitedly.

"Here." Chisame said, giving Makie the bag of goodies. "Hope your satisfied."

"Hmmm…"

Makie checked off the items one by one. Everything seemed to be correct, save for a single item in particular. She inspected the carton of coffee milkshake carefully.

"…oh, did I say coffee milkshake, I meant to say toffee milkshake!" Makie realised.

Chisame frowned.

"Well, come on housemaid-chan! Exchange the coffee milkshake for the toffee one please!"

"You mean go all the way back to the restaurant?" Chisame asked.

"Mmm-hmm!" Makie nodded.

Chisame made an eyesmile. Makie also made an eyesmile.

There was a combined sound of a crush and a splat as Chisame later left the room. Makie stood dumbstruck as a crushed carton lay on top of her head, with coffee milkshake dripping all over her hair and face.

"Maybe I went slightly overboard." She said to herself.

-0-0-

With her hands around her back, Chisame paced back and forth in her technological chamber. So far today, the only objective she achieved was total chaos.

"Well, so far, so shit." She said, voice heavy with frustration. "How does he do it? How does Keitaro do it? Every day he overexerts himself. He cooks, he cleans, he helps Mosquito study, he trains and meditates with Mana… and during this time he smiles, as if he enjoys doing the things he does."

Chisame stopped and stood rooted to the ground. She clenched a hopeful fist and looked at the ceiling.

"No! I can't give up just yet! Let's see… soon it'll be time for dinner, but what can I prepare for them? Damn it! I knew I should have studied my mother's cooking! Wait… I could order a surprise takeaway! Sure it'll burn a hole in my pocket, but it's either that or I'll burn everyone's meal!"

She collapsed on the bed, thoughts swirling in her head. Trouble is, she didn't know any take away joints in Tokyo… but then an anvil called 'stupid' landed on top of her.

"Of course! The Internet!" She said, and flung herself on the swivel chair.

Logging onto a well known search engine, Chisame keyed in the words 'Tokyo Take Away'. She watched the screen as a long list appeared, but the one that caught her eye was at the very top. She clicked on the link and was presented with a nicely designed webpage with all the necessary details. Jackpot.

Chisame soaked in the information, her glasses showing the screen's reflection. "Right, according to this I have the option of choosing Meal 'A', the family size feast… or Meal 'B', where you have to manually select what portions you want… I get it, it's A for no fuss and B for specific choice of food."

She clicked onto 'A' but got nothing for her results. She groaned a little inside, looking at the phone number below.

"Hmph! Some website!" She grumbled. "Can't even order your food online!"

She snatched her mobile phone from its container and rapidly dialled in the number. She waited a few seconds before someone picked up the receiving end.

"Hiya!" A lady greeted. Chisame couldn't place her voice, but she definitely did not sound Japanese. Perhaps she was European or American? "Do you wish for our special services?"

Chisame scrunched her face. "'Hiya'? What sort of telephone greeting is that?!" Nonetheless, she gave the speaker the address to Hinata-Sou, and afterwards asked for Meal A.

"Oooooh! You selected A? That's a popular one! Most guys go for that!" The lady answered.

"Um, that's nice." Replied Chisame.

"So who is the lucky man?"

"Uumm… pardon?"

"Who is the lucky man?"

"Oh… uh… well that would be Keitaro Urashima, the manager of Hinata-Sou."

"Oooooh! A manager? Kinky! Well, we will arrive in fifteen minutes time!"

"Okay, thanks, bye."

Chisame pressed the off button on her mobile.

"Well that was weird. Lucky man? Kinky? Was she drunk?"

-0-0-

It was a quiet spell for the time being. Mana and Keitaro returned to their rooms after training, and Makie returned to her room after washing out the milkshake in her hair. Yue was watching an anime show in the living room. Keitaro made sure his door was closed all the way. On his computer screen was his spiritual, childhood friend, Sayo.

"…maybe she's had a change of heart?" The ghost suggested.

Keitaro replied. "That's what Tatsumiya-san said, and I agreed with her… but now that I think about it, Hasegawa-san seems a little too eager. I mean she works full time on weekdays, and sometimes most hours on weekends as well. I mean if I were her, I would relish every bit of time off I had."

"Well… you work hard as well Kei-kun."

"But Hasegawa-san… she always gets stressed out after work. I admit I'm a hard worker, well… I'm a fairly hard worker, but my job is completely different from hers. I'm my own manager, but she works for other people."

As Sayo paused to think things through, Keitaro wondered if he was loading too much of his problems onto her.

"Last night, Hasegawa-san was awfully quiet." He added.

Sayo's response surprised him. "Perhaps something happened to her at work?"

"You… think so?"

"Maybe."

There was a loud knock on the main door. Keitaro briefly wondered who it could be. Makie's friends, perhaps? Maybe it was Haitani and Shirai?

"Gotta dash!" He said. "Thanks for your help Sayo-san!"

Sayo made an eyesmile. "No problem Kei-kun!" And with those words she faded away, reverting back to Keitaro's original desktop screen.

Preparing to welcome the additional company, Keitaro rushed to the hallway and into the living room. During that short distance, he heard a small group of female voices. Yue must have opened the door to greet them… though they didn't sound anything like Yuna or Ako. Something was up. As he set foot into the living room, his heart stopped.

"These women say they wanted to see you." Said Yue, unsurprised as always.

Keitaro swallowed a lump in his throat. Three woman, five foot ten in height, all stood in superior stances, like they were some kind of freedom fighting force. They all had their hands on their hips, and their long legs were nearly half a metre apart. One had green hair, one had blonde hair and the other had purple hair, all untied and flowing down to their backs. Each of them wore very tight and seductive nurse outfits, each with a skirt that was criminally short considering their height. On their feet were red high heel shoes. Their busts were around Miwa size… perhaps shockingly larger. If one of these women so much as breathed, their outfits would probably explode.

"Um… c-can I help you?" He asked.

The purple haired lady acquired a small piece of paper from her cleavage. "Is your name Guitar Urine Cheetah?"

Keitaro was taken back with her language. Probably American, he assumed.

"Close enough." Keitaro replied.

The trio formed into another stance and started to kick their long legs into the air. Keitaro pinched his nose. Underneath the skirts were not panties, but thongs.

They all cheered as one. "We're Tia, Maria and Nina… and together we are… THE NAUGHTY NURSE BRIGADE!"

Before Keitaro could react (i.e. run away), 'Tia' escorted him to the couch where he was pushed violently into the middle of it. 'Maria' placed a CD in the player, which at once, filled the room with a thumping dance track. Keitaro watched in fear as the three Americans danced all over him, swaying their long hair and performing a whole manner of sexual poses. One minute of dancing later, they did the unthinkable. They clutched their nurse outfits… and tore them open. In a flourish, skirts were flung across the room. Underwear was revealed.

"What the hell is going on?!" Chisame demanded as she ran to the hallway and to the living room. When she watched the display, her eyes popped out of her smashed glasses. "WHAT THE FUCK?!"

"They appear to be strippers." Yue stated, watching the show with a mild interest.

"I CAN SEE THAT, SHERLOCK!" Chisame blared out.

"They call themselves the 'Naughty Nurse Brigade.'"

"Wait a sec…" Chisame said to herself. "…I have a real bad feeling about this…"

As Keitaro continued to witness the titillating horror, Chisame flipped open a pocket sized laptop, as big as the palm of her hand. Using a stylus, she logged onto the search engine and keyed in Yue's said words.

"Naughty… Nurse… Brigade…" She said as she browsed through the website. She looked at the phone number and turned white. The number was exactly the same as the takeaway website… except for one number at the end.

"I dialled the wrong number." Chisame realised, completely exasperated.

Makie and Mana ran to the scene. Both were equally as horrified. "Th-these are… str-strippers?!? S…S… SENPAI HOW COULD YOU?!?!" Makie cried out.

"It wasn't Keitaro, it was me!" Chisame defended. Keitaro would have made a protest, but was too stunned to answer.

"CHISAME HOW COULD YOU?!?!"

Whilst Makie and Chisame engaged in a fierce argument, the manager's little Keitaro had grown to adulthood. If any more clothing were to be removed, all of his vital organs would implode here and there. Mana came to the rescue. Just as bra straps were about to be unhooked, Mana palm slammed all of the girls to oblivion. Three semi-naked corpses lied on the floor.

"WAAAAAAGH!!" Makie screamed. "THEY'RE DEAD! THEY'RE DEAD!"

"HOLY SHIT! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO KILL THEM!" Chisame barked.

"They're not dead." Mana replied. "I temporarily erased their memories."

"OH, IS THAT IT?! GREAT! NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT THEN! NEXT TIME YOU CAN TURN THEM INTO VEGETABLES!"

"I'm taking them to the hospital." Mana informed, ignoring Chisame's boiling rage. "You three make sure Keitaro is alright."

With strength and speed, Mana swiftly carried the Americans and rushed outside. Keitaro opened one eye, his hands shivering on top of his head. Both nostrils were bleeding, and it looked like his ears were starting to bleed as well.

"So what's for dinner?" Yue asked.

-0-0-

The rest of the evening fell quiet. In the hospital, Mana took some time explaining what had happened, but thankfully the Americans were quickly escorted (and covered up) so they can recover. When Mana arrived back, Keitaro elected to do the dinner, to which Makie breathed a sigh of relief, as if to rub it in Chisame's face. It was amazing how things quickly reverted to normality, but such was the way when one lived in Hinata-Sou. Just a temporary visit was enough to store memories for a lifetime… good, bad or frighteningly insane.

It was midnight, but Chisame remained awake. Her arms hung over the balcony as she stared at the crescent moon. It was the first time she stood still for a while, considering she was always too busy working or cosplaying. Observing the scenery was a refreshing experience.

"Hey." Came a familiar voice.

Keitaro could not sleep either. He was concerned about her wellbeing. During dinner, Chisame was silent, much like last night. Maybe it was best to leave her alone. No… he wanted to help her somehow, but how could he help? He felt his stomach turn in knots. Stealing his nerves, Keitaro walked over and rested by the balcony, next to her. Over six months they have lived under the same roof, but still the relationship between Keitaro and Chisame remained awkward. Keitaro could not remember many times where he had a proper conversation with her, especially when they were alone. So in all actuality, it wasn't even a relationship… more like, at the best of times, a mutual acknowledgement.

"I used to relax here when I was five." He said. He waited for an answer but didn't receive one. He got the impression he wasn't wanted. One guy too many. He considered turning back and walking away.

"Keitaro… …I quit my job." She said at last. Even though Keitaro had his suspicions, her words were needles piercing into him. He could only imagine how much she was suffering.

"I'm sorry." Was all Keitaro could say.

Chisame intended to smile, but it came out as a short, pain-stricken laugh. "Sad when you think about it, but that was my dream, to be a games tester. To enjoy playing games and get paid for it. Sounds more like fun then an actual job… …but it wasn't the job that made me quit, it was the people I worked with."

She stopped resting now, and turned to directly face Keitaro. She continued to speak, opening more of her heart.

"No one would listen to me! I was just mud to them! All my opinions would get tossed aside like bits of rubbish! That's why I quit! I quit because I couldn't stand those… those bastards!"

She lowered her head, feeling a little ashamed. Why would she think Keitaro would want to hear her problems? Keitaro's life was a cycle of challenges, two of the most important ones being to keep the tea shop out of business and making sure his residences were satisfied. Chisame felt pathetic. She couldn't even maintain a single job.

"Hasegawa-san… it's okay…"

"No it's not okay! I can't pay the monthly rent anymore! I should just leave now!" Chisame shouted, though her dry voice softened her normal loudness.

"I'm sorry about your job, but I'm not going to throw you out just because you have some financial difficulty." Keitaro replied softly.

Chisame swallowed a small lump in her throat. "Really?"

"Really… and stop worrying! Take as much time as you need! You'll find another job… and… I can help you… if you want."

They locked eyes, and Chisame had a muddled expression, unsure how to express her gratitude. With the exception of her family, no one has ever been this kind to her. "Well… if you say so…"

Keitaro nodded. "I am saying so."

"Okay… um… thanks, listen I better call it a night."

"…Me too."

"So… I guess… um, goodnight, um, Ma… uh Kei, uh yeah goodnight."

"Yeah…Chis… g-goodnight."

With mixed feelings, Keitaro and Chisame parted their separate ways. Only when she walked into the hallway had Chisame acknowledged the cold, shivering as she did so. She approached her door, but didn't open it. She heard his door open and close. Already Keitaro was preparing himself for sleep.

"Yeah… I can really see why Makie and Mana like him so much. I hope he chooses one of them… then hopefully he can forget about me."

'Her name is Chisame'. Still she remembered those bold words. She was Chiu and he was Keitaro. Keitaro confessed. Chisame shook her head, praying Keitaro was just confused that day.

"He wouldn't want me… … I would make a terrible girlfriend."

She entered her room and closed the door. Solitude once again. She looked at her bed, but something told her not to go to sleep, at least not yet. By instinct, Chisame walked over to her wardrobe and swung it open with both hands. She feasted her eyes on a recently acquired lime green outfit. Her grin stretched from ear to ear.

Tonight… Nurse Chiu was going to make her first exclusive appearance…

Author: Yep you guessed it, I got the idea from when Motoko became a housemaid… only this time it's Chisame instead of her. I felt tempted to rename the chapter to 'wrong number', because of… well yeah that. See you in the next chapter… though before I go, you may be interested in the crappy omake I made…

OMAKE!

Haitani and Shirai lived in their small but comfy apartment, both of them rubbing their hands with glee. The door knocked and the two knuckleheads ran manically, shoving each other in the process. Together they swung the door open.

"Hiya!" Ku Fei beamed. She was wearing an ornate Chinese outfit. "Here is your family feast!"

"AWESOME!" Shirai shouted at the bag she was carrying. "We get food as well!"

Haitani grinned like the most mischievous schoolboy who ever graced earth.

"Is there problem?" Ku Fei asked.

"No problem at all!" Haitani replied. "So… … when are you gonna strip naked?"

Ku Fei flushed red. Perhaps it was anger. Perhaps it was embarrassment. Most likely both. One colossus laser blast later and Haitani's head crushed through the ceiling and he flew into the sky. You could still hear him screaming in the distance.

Shirai looked at the massive hole. He then looked at a mightily pissed off Ku Fei. He scratched his head and dared to ask something.

"So… um… we still get to keep the food, right?"