Disclaimer: No, little sleep and caffeine do not mix together and create people into J.K. Rowling, even if that person really wishes they could wake up as that great author. These all belong to her.

A/N: Two more chapters to go before I'm done for the night, morning. I know you all hate me after that last one, please don't hate me even more.

Chapter 29

November 1978

I had been with the team for a month already, and still I had not attempted to fulfill my promise to Remus. The team was very close, which helped them to work as a single unit, as though each of them knew where the other one was going to be before the person with the quaffle did. At first I had been fearful of being seen as the outsider, as the rookie that was trying to fill the place of a person each of them cared for. This fear had lasted all of two minutes, because the team showed me that they wanted me to be included in their unit. They did not see me as someone trying to take a position that could not be filled, but instead as one that was stepping into a new role all together.

The teammate I was closest to was Fletch, a beater with brown hair and blue eyes. He was four or five years my senior, and when he had heard that I was getting married soon, started giving me advice. He had been married for two years himself, and had told me an interesting story of how indecisive brides-to-be could be. His wife had gone through three different wedding themes before landing on quidditch, which meant that her and her husband would marry on brooms. The guests had sat in the bleachers on a cold January morning, as they had watched the ceremony. The reception was then laid out on the ground of the pitch. Fletch had enjoyed it, and was glad that he had found someone that not only loved him, but also the things he did.

The fact that I had yet to propose had not been mentioned to my new friend, nor had it been mentioned to Remus or Sirius. I could not speak of it with Sirius, because every time Lily's name was brought up, the pain was evident on his face. It broke my heart, and Lily herself was beginning to become confused as to what was happening, she and Sirius had become good friends and yet he was shutting her out. She knew it had to do with the fact he hated sharing me with her, and the few times that we had been together showed her that I couldn't do this for much longer either. Remus was another matter, I did not want to disappoint him. I knew he said that I didn't have to do this, but I was having a hard time believing him. He couldn't handle being forced into the world he had painted in my mind so expertly. I would protect him, I just had to gather the courage to do so.

So, one day, about a month into my first year with the Tornados, Lily and I were enjoying a quiet dinner at a nice Italian restaurant. I hated the fact that I could take Lily to place like that restaurant, but I was only allowed to be with my loves in the safety of our home. When I took my pups out, I had to make sure that no one was watching before I could reach across the table for their hand. I despised the freedom I had with Lily, though maybe it was more jealousy then detestation. Lily was casting a wary eye around our settings, and I remembered the look in her eye. It was the same one she had worn the first night that we had been together in the most intimate of ways. I wished that I could adhere to her silent protests, but I knew that I had to do what was best for my Moony.

"Lily," I started after we had eaten our dinner. She had had an elegant plate of Chicken Parmesan, compared to my ordinary spaghetti and meatballs. We had shared a bottle of wine, and talked as we normally did. As though we were nothing more or less then two good friends that loved each other very much. Though still, no matter how many times I had been with her, and I was now at a place where I enjoyed it, I could never admit to being in love with her. My heart was not mine to give away, and even if I was to get a positive answer that night, those that owned it would never hand it over.

"I know that you told Bradshaw that you wanted to wait for a couple of years to get married." I said after a long pause, in which I had to goad my chest into not tightening up as it was doing. "But, he has also said that the Ministry will not leave Sirius, Remus, and I be until one of us is married. We know we have been playing with fate for a long time, and you are possibly the only woman that would help us as you are. If we play with it for much longer, I do not know what they will do to us." I paused, and waited for her to have some reaction. She didn't.

"Lily, you have every right to walk away right now." I reminded her. I don't know how many times I had told her that she deserved better, and it was true, and the longer she stayed just proved that. She was a beautiful woman, red-hair and green eyes, and a smile that lit up the world. She had the world at her fingertips, a training that would take her far, and a build and personality that would help her find the greatest man in the world to love her, to fall in love with her. "You deserve more than I could ever give you. You deserve a man that wants to crawl into bed with you every night. One that, and I am so sorry for having to admit this, that doesn't imagine another when he is with you, but instead wants you and only you. You deserve a man that would do anything to give you the world, not one that needs you in order to give the world to others."

"James, I love you, and I have loved Remus." Lily interrupted me. "You give me the things I need, and when I accept your offer, I know you will continue to do that. You give me a purpose, a true purpose. On some levels I agree with you that I am being used, but I knew what I was getting myself into when I accepted your offer in Sixth Year. Honestly we've been doing this for so long, I have to wonder if I would know what to do if I walked away. I don't know how it will work, because I would never wish to take you that far away from Sirius and Remus. They love you more than I could ever dream of loving you, and that is because they are your soul mates.

"When I first caught you three, I wondered how it could be possible that you could have two soul mates. Then I got to watch you three over this last year or so, and I remembered something important. You three are not normal, and you have always been three parts of a whole. When Remus realized how he felt for you two, I knew it was just a matter of time before a puzzle was completed. That's what it is with you three, a puzzle of a beautiful picture that snapped together easily." She trailed off here, and I realized that it was finally my time.

"Lily," I said as I dropped to my knee beside her. I knew I had to do at least this right, because it was one of the things I could give her that she wanted. "I can't make any of the promises that are traditionally made in this setting, because I have already made them. I still think you should get out of this before it's too late, but if you're willing to stay...Then Lily Marie Evans, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" I thought this was the best way to do it, because I was already married. Sure I had never really proposed before, but I wasn't asking a question I didn't have a right under the Law I was willing to live under. That thought was just another of the many that showed me how messed up my life was. I was willingly living under the law of the books in moments where I did the typical couple things with Lily. I was just refusing to abide by that same law when I was in the privacy of my own home.

"Yes," Lily answered nearly immediately after I had asked my question. The other patrons at the restaurant were clapping and wolf-whistling, and so we shared a theatrical kiss for their benefit. When we pulled away from each other we laughed. Other couples would have kissed each other in the happiness of the moment, we were kissing so that we could put on a show. Lily and I should move to Hollywood and become actors, we were professionals at work. I guess a year and a half of the same game will do that to a person.

"We'll have to have a muggle wedding," Lily said. I had paid for the meal, and we had started out walking towards her flat. It was just a few blocks away from the restaurant, and the walk would calm us down. That was my excuse for deciding against just appariating to her complex. "My parents know I'm a witch, but the rest of my family doesn't. We're pretty close to them all, and they'll be thoroughly disappointed if they aren't invited."

"That's fine Lily," I said with a shrug. I had done the proposing, and really didn't want to think about anything else. If it was up to me I'd give her the reigns to the whole thing, and just be where she told me I was needed on the day of question. I wanted to be fair to her though, so I would show the proper amount of enthusiasm for the day that was supposed to be the best day of my life. It wouldn't be though, because it would just be a pretend anniversary. My true anniversary fell in February, though I don't think either Remus, Sirius, or myself actually knew the actual date. To mark the first one though, we had sneaked out of Hogwarts and spent a day in Hogsmeade instead of going to class.

"I was thinking September," She continued as we neared the next block that separated her flat from the restaurant. "That will give us plenty of time to plan everything, but it will also fall in a time where you aren't busy with your Quidditch. You're already pretty involved in the practice season, and then scrimmages start in February, followed by your matches in March till August. I was talking to Mandy, that's Fletch's wife, at that last practice I was at. She told me that they don't get a lot of down time during the actual season, so that rules a wedding out for those months. It's already well into November, and three months is too short a time to plan something my mother would accept for my wedding. I hope you don't mind that it'll have to be big."

"No Lily, we'll it do your way." I muttered, and smiled apologetically at the look she threw me at my comment. "I wish I could be more excited, I really do." I assured her. "It's just, I don't think anything we could plan is going to be as amazing as a golden ball with a bunch of other lights binding our souls together." She chuckled at this. I had finally told her just before we left Hogwarts that Remus, Sirius, and I were married under the Law of Magic. I think it was a lot more than she let on, but sometimes she would show how upset the injustice of the whole situation made her feel. The day I had told her about my pups and I's very own little ceremony, she showed her reaction to the "stupid, bigot Ministry, and their stupid, bigot rules," quite animatedly.

She talked about different things that had to do with wedding plans, and I listened with half an ear. I felt like something inside of me had been bent, as though it was well on it's way to being broken. The fact that it was in the center of my chest gave me an idea of what it could be, but it was impossible. The bond couldn't be broken, at least that was what Remus had said after he had researched the golden ball. We were stuck together forever is what it said, and we were all supposed to be thrilled with that. There could be nothing better then getting to spend forever with my pups.

I was just about to appareate after I had walked into the alley not far from Lily's complex when the pain became nearly unbearable. I slumped against the wall and rubbed my chest hopping that eventually it would stop hurting so much. When I had eased the pain, with a helping dose of thoughts of my Moony and my Padfoot racing through my mind, I heard a low chuckle in the alley. I turned my head, and saw him. He was still as good-looking as he had been on the night my parents had died, but the evilness that rolled off of him had only increased. He walked up to me, standing a breathe away and ran a paler hand across my face. His eyes seemed to be changing in color as well, turning to a shade that was nearly red.

"Hello James," he said in a low voice that I knew was supposed to sound seductive. The thing that caught me was that it sent chills down my back, and I don't think they were all from disgust. My hand moved to my pocket, in a frantic search for my wand, but his own caught mine and pinned them against my hips. "No, no," he chided in a sickly-sweet voice. "We're not here to duel. If we were I would have brought more of my followers. We're just going to chat."

"I don't want to chat with you," I said shakily, "Tom," I added with the largest amount of fierceness that I could find in myself at that moment. He snarled at the use of his name.

"You know that the last man that dared called me that died." He didn't ask me if I knew this fact. His tone was that of a disgusted reminder, and I had to control myself from lashing out at him. "I won't kill you, not yet," he assured. His face was still much to close to mine, and the way his nearly red eyes were looking at me twisted my stomach into very tight knots. "If I wanted you dead James," I hated how he was using my first name, the way he said it in this dark alley, was in the tone of a lover. This man was not one of my lovers, he was a killer, a murderer that had stolen my parents away from me. "I would have done it the same night I killed your parents."

"No," I growled, "you just want to give me the same offer that you did that night. Well guess what?" I didn't give him a chance to guess. "You're disgusting, vile, evil, and you killed my parents." I shouted the last four words. "I would rather die than join you." I said before I did a very grave mistake. I spit in his face, and made sure my target was one of his reddening eyes. He roared back, moving almost as though a cobra that was about to strike, before his hand that had been cupping my cheek so softly moments before, slapped across the same cheek hard. My head rolled to the side from the impact, and slammed hard into the wall I was pressed against.

"I will only give you one more shot Potter," he growled as he let me go. "After that, the fourth time we meet you will not be so lucky." With that he walked out of the alley, and I appearated home. Thinking about my lovers lying in our bed waiting for me. The next time I opened my eyes, I saw nearly the scene I had envisioned. Sirius was laying on his stomach across the bed, a notebook in front of him as his pen raced across the pages. Remus was propped against the headboard, his sketchpad resting on his bent knees, and his hand making soft tracks across his page. They looked up when they heard the pop of my entrance.

"She dump you?" Sirius asked when he saw the angry red mark against my face. I shook my head, and raised my hand to the spot where it had slammed against the wall. When I pulled it down, I was relieved to see that I wasn't bleeding.

"No," I said, more to test out the shakiness of my voice then to answer his question. They both continued to eye me with concern. "I ran into Tom Riddle before I came home." At this they were both out of the bed, at my side, and pressing me into the sheets. "He asked me to join him, tried to seduce me if I can be considered and expert in the art." I said with a smirk that was supposed to be sexy, neither of them were amused. "I told him no, spat in his face, he slapped me. He hits really hard."

A/N: Okay, so we have evil murdering psycho Voldie, Voldie. Then we have, let me see if I can entice you with offers of pretty favors, Voldie, Voldie. What are you guys thinking about my Voldie, Voldie? I'll stop now. Now, how many of you hate me for that proposal?