Chapter 29: Never Forget Regret
"Spyro, this is bad!" I yelled, my clenched fists shaking. Any second now, our next two opponents would appear. And I was prepared to bet that this time we wouldn't be able to beat them so easily.
"No shit!" Spyro growled back, a note of panic in his voice.
"We have to get out of here!" I insisted desperately, without any idea how. Then I had a brainwave.
"Spyro," I said, hope colouring my tone, "I think I can phase us out of here!"
"Where are we?"
"About two hundred miles north of Warfang and thirty miles south of Boyzitbig," I replied automatically. Spyro stared, completely dumfounded as to how I knew this.
"I'll ask later," he said quickly, "just get us the hell out of here!"
"Grab on!" I yelled and they clutched at my arms as I began to glow. For a split second I saw the image of a huge, hideous creature that I assumed to be the Golem. It gave a terrible screech that pierced my eardrums. Then the world flashed around us and disappeared.
We popped up near the destroyed mole village near the base of the ruined volcano of Boyzitbig. Spyro and Cynder released me and I bent over, my hands on my knees as I got my breath back. We were safe, for now.
"Now what the hell was that about?" Spyro asked bluntly, moments later, "You seemed to know a lot about that place!"
"I really don't want to remember that part of my life," I murmured, straightening up and looking away. I felt Cynder's eyes on me and knew she understood how I felt.
"I know, Cole, but we need to know," she pressed gently.
I looked at Spyro, "Spyro, the three most important things anyone can have is love, compassion, and regret." Cynder bowed her head and stared at her feet, understanding. My voice was thick with bitterness, "I could kill you now and not feel any pain about it. Promise me, promise me, Spyro, that you will never become like me."
Spyro was stunned and stuttering, "C-Cole you…you can't mean that."
Cynder looked up, "Yes, he does, I'm afraid."
"Love is what shapes us, compassion is what shapes others around you, and regret is what makes us who we are. You wanted to know? Well, here it is."
7 Years Ago
We had left Warfang less than a month ago. The deaths of our friends and families had hit us hard, but we all had different ways of coping. Gust just didn't think about it. I don't know how he did it. Rumbler became as emotional as a rock. Flash became a clown, a joker, in his efforts to push the pain away. And Specter… to this day, I still don't how she coped or what she did to lessen the pain.
I steeled myself by showing love only to my friends. I became ruthless. We didn't have any food and we weren't good hunters, so we started raiding small villages, stealing food and gems. At first it was only enough for us to survive, but then we began to become greedy.
One time, a guard caught Specter stealing food. I was the only one with her. He was going to kill her. I went after him and started hitting and didn't stop. I had planned only to knock him out, but I killed him. His blood stained my hands. I made Specter promise not to tell the others. I said I would in time.
Every time I closed my eyes I saw his dead body and my bloody hands. Specter was able to put a block in my mind so the visions would stop. A few weeks later, we were approached by a fiery orange dragon. His name was Nova. He offered us food and a place to sleep. All we had to do was kidnap dragons for his Underdrome.
We accepted. We were assigned to 'recruit' fighters and guards. The first one was the worst. Specter was able to paralyze her, but couldn't stop her from talking. She was screaming about her family and kids. Her words hit like hammer blows.
After that, the screams meant less and less until that horrible day when I didn't feel anything at all.
Spyro was speechless. Cynder just looked sad.
"Cole, I'm sorry…" Spyro looked stricken. In his eyes, he had just made me relive a living hell.
"No, I needed to tell someone about that," I said, shaking my head.
"Cole, I know how you feel," Cynder said consolingly.
"I know that you do, Cynder," I looked at Spyro, "But I hope thatyounever EVER know what it feels like."
Spyro looked very concerned and whispered, "Cole, I've killed so many…"
"I know, Spyro, but they all were in self-defence," I assured him. I looked towards the horizon, towards where the Dragon City was situated, "Come on, we need to head out."
We began the journey back to Warfang, but Spyro trailed a little ways behind. I thought I heard him whisper.
"Not Gaul. Not Gaul."
