A/N. Last chapter a lot of you were a mix of happy and unhappy. Like "YEY SIRIUS AND HERMIONE" and also "Sirius, that cheating bastard." And it's true - Sirius is a cheating bastard. But it would hardly be a story if Hermione and Sirius magically fixed all their problems and lived happy ever after, right?

I've also received comments on the difference in genre between this and TLM. TLM was heavily adventure with plenty of romance mixed in, while this is heavily romance with a dash of adventure. I dunno if you guys like or dislike this, but let me know!

Resa Fun Fact:

As said in the last chapter... today is my birthday *smiles* For which I am doing absolutely nothing special. My last birthday my friend, who was friends with the entire football team at the college, threw me a party (which the team attended) and we had one hell of a time. Granted, I didn't know most of the people there, but I made a lot of friends that night and maybe got a teensy little bit too drunk.

...~oOo~...

Chapter Twenty-Nine: Fake Smiles & False Hopes

"Christ, you smell..." Kiss. "Amazing..." Kiss. A satisfied rumble resonated deep in Sirius's chest.

Hermione couldn't help but chuckle, but the light laughter morphed into a moan as Sirius slid his hands into the waist of her jeans, edging downward until Hermione shivered. She had no clue what had come over her - normally she would have slapped his hands and pulled away, but something about being in Sirius's embrace again was intoxicating.

Unsure of how she got there, Hermione was pressed against the wall of her bedroom, Sirius pinning her with his entire body - and it was more than welcome. One of her legs was hooked around his hip, like how she saw in movies and read in books.

Sirius's fingers were a little cold, but warming up quickly, so when he unbuttoned her jeans, she felt it and stiffened a little bit.

Pausing, Sirius sighed. "You're going to push me away now, aren't you?"

Shaking her head, Hermione gave a nervous shudder and said, "N-no, I'm not... I just... I should probably tell you that I, er, lied before."

Raising a brow, he asked, "Lied about what?"

"About not being a... you know," she said, feeling her cheeks burn bright. This was so embarrassing.

It took a moment, but Sirius pieced it together and whispered, "You're a virgin?"

Biting her lip, Hermione closed her eyes and nodded.

Then, very unexpectedly, Hermione was in the air, feet off the ground and gathered against Sirius's chest, being kissed with more excitement than ever before. She made a shocked little sound, but went along with it, tightening her thighs around his hips.

"Thank Merlin," he breathed when he broke from the kiss, laughing breathlessly. "When you said... God, thank Merlin, Christ, whoever's up there!" He laughed again, louder and fuller this time.

"What are you so happy about?" Hermione asked as he peppered her throat with kisses and bites.

"Just... I'm happy," was all Sirius said, tightening his hold on her then settling her on the bed gently. He propped himself over her and smiled at her. "I had no clue how much I missed you, love, until right now."

"Remus says you kept photos of me," Hermione said curiously. "Why?"

Sirius shrugged. "I'm not sure. It felt right, I guess. I also kept all the notes we passed in class in a shoebox under my bed. Pathetic, isn't it?"

Hermione suppressed a giggle, but couldn't help it from bursting from her lips. Sirius watched as she laughed, almost uncontrollably, and he joined in heartily. These were the moments that he had ached for - Hermione laughing so hard that her face turned pink, her face glowing, and their hands intertwined.

"I'm sorry," Hermione panted through her laughter. "I am! It's just... You're too cute!" And she pealed off into more giggles.

"Cute? Are you kidding? I'm not cute!" Sirius said, mock-offended. "I have been called many things, but no one's dared to call me 'cute'. You'll pay for that." His eyes darkened with a predatory glint in them.

"And how do you think you're going to do tha-MMMmmm!" With his lips coaxing hers open again, Hermione giggled into his mouth and cupped his jaw with her hands. He playfully pinched her bum, she laughed again, and then there was a loud knocking coming from the front of the flat.

With a panicked scream - when suddenly all of her brain cells came together and realized she was doing something she shouldn't be - Hermione jumped up, smacked her forehead into Sirius's by accident, to which she jerked away and then fell face first onto the floor.

"Are you okay?" Sirius asked immediately, crouching down and helping her sit up.

Hermione nodded and rubbed her nose, which was very abused as of late, what with landing on it in Dumbledore's office and now her own room.

Then they both heard the voice calling out from the door. "Hermione! It's Remus! Are you home?"

"Shit!" Sirius hissed.

"Get under the bed! The closet! Something, anything!" Hermione was whispering. "I'll be there in just a second, Remus!" she called out as she shoved at Sirius, pushing him to do something - anything!

Sirius, however, had no clue what the hell she was expecting him to do and was trying to ask her, but she kept shushing him while she looked for a shirt.

Finally, Hermione ripped the comforters off the bed and dropped them over Sirius, who was kneeling on the floor. Flushed and anxious, Hermione said, "Now just... stay... there!"

Looking like nothing more than a person hiding under a blanket, Sirius said, "It isn't like he's going to come in your bedroom." Then he paused and asked suspiciously, "Right?"

"SHUSH!" Hermione snapped, dragging a camisole over her head and running out to answer the door. She flung it open, breathing heavily, trying and failing to look casual and put on a smile. "Hello, Remus! How are you this lovely day?"

Raising an eyebrow, Remus said, "I'm... alright. I rather thought your day was going less-than-lovely, though?"

"Oh, well," Hermione said, waving it away nonchalantly. "That's life, isn't it? All water under the bridge now, though. After all, it has been..." She trailed off, looking around for the clock.

"Two hours?" Remus filled in for her. He looked inside the doorway and said, "What are you packing for? Trading this dingy space for a new flat?"

"Um..." Hermione scratched the back of her head, looking at her trunks and boxes. "Actually, I was considering maybe just moving again, you know? Back to France, or something."

Remus frowned. "Was your row with Sirius that bad?"

Pursing her lips in thought, Hermione nodded and the dread settled in her heart. "Yeah... it was," she sighed. "But there are other reasons, of course. See, Dandy's already killed all of the mice in this flat and she won't do well without something to do, so... we'll move on." She looked up at Remus and said, "Was there something you needed help with, Remus?"

"Actually, yes," he said. "Sirius said he was coming by the apologize and I wanted to know if that went well, but seeing the trunks and whatnot I'm going to assume he made an arse of himself again?"

"Something like that, yes," Hermione answered. More like I made an arse out of myself.

"I'm sorry, Hermione," Remus said, sounding so sincere it made Hermione feel guilty for lying. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Hermione paused. She kind of did, but Sirius was in the bedroom hiding...

Sirius was in the bedroom hiding. A devious thought creeped its way into Hermione's head. What if she had a nice long cup of tea with Remus while Sirius was left half-naked and nervous?

While she was rationalizing with herself why that was wrong and mean, Remus was saying, "Come on, let's put on some tea. And if you don't want to talk about Sirius, we'll talk about books, okay?"

Suddenly desperate for the warming, comforting company that was Remus, Hermione reasoned that Sirius was a wizard and if he wanted to leave, Apparition was one flick of the wand away.

Hermione nodded and Remus walked in, strolling towards the kitchen when she knew she was forgetting something important...

"Uh, Hermione?"

"Yes, Remus?" Hermione answered, still wondering what that something was.

"What is Sirius's jacket and shirt doing on your kitchen floor?" he asked, sounding accusatory. He turned to her with a blunt expression and a disapprovingly raised eyebrow.

She smacked herself in the forehead. "Brilliant," she muttered. "I don't suppose you'd believe I've gone back to laundering his clothes?"

"I'm afraid not," Remus said. "Alright, you can come out, Sirius! I know you're in here!"

It was about a half-minute before they heard the creak of Hermione's bedroom door and the heavy footfalls enter in from the hallways. Sirius stood in the kitchen, looking not even slightly ashamed at his half-nakedness or at getting caught, but maybe a little disappointed. He was shaking his head.

"Hermione, Hermione," Sirius sighed. "Always clean up the evidence."

"I'm sorry that I'm not familiar with the protocol of unexpected clothing removal before being interrupted by your best friend!" Hermione hissed.

Remus's arms were crossed and his glare was enough to even make Sirius's bravado flicker. "Both of you. Couch. Now."

A few minutes later, they all had fresh tea at the coffee table and Sirius - still shirtless, his firm, toned, muscled body displayed shamelessly - and Hermione were sitting on the couch side-by-side, not touching, while Remus stood in front of them. He looked every bit the disappointed professor catching two students pant-less after curfew in the dark.

"You two have possibly the most horrendous history I've ever seen," Remus began, his tone firm and unforgiving. "First Sirius is a big bully, then you two enter a mutual hatred, then that hatred became mild dislike, and then you both started dating. Then you dated for months where Sirius became sex-deprived and annoying and Hermione remained distant and never spoke about anything that involved depth. Then Hermione broke it off, Sirius punched a wall, went on to pretend he never cared. Hermione disappears. Sirius sleeps his way through half of England, eventually moves on, enters a relationship. Hermione comes back out of the blue, you two scream at one another, Sirius tries to apologize, you two have sex. Am I missing anything?"

Sirius and Hermione exchanged a look.

"All true, except for the last bit," Sirius said. "You interrupted before we could really get anywhere."

"Oh, lovely, let me just step out and let you get on with it," Remus said sharply. "Time for a reality check, you two. You have problems. So many problems. This is not healthy. Sirius doesn't know how to act or think rationally around you, Hermione, and I don't think you can either. You're dating Marlene, Sirius, you have been for more than three months. And while I don't completely approve of your new taste in obnoxious blonde women, you seemed happy, and so did she. This isn't fair to her, and it isn't to Hermione. You can't make promises to Hermione when you're still with Marlene, who I'm fairly sure has been faithful... unlike you."

With a sigh, Sirius dragged a hand down his face, nodding. He looked like a kicked puppy now. "Yeah... I know."

"And Hermione, you don't deserve this idiot," Remus continued. "Think about it. If he's willing to cheat on Marlene, what does that mean if you two got together again? What would happen if someone he thinks he loves more than you drops out of the sky? Will they engage in a steamy tumble in the kitchen?

"The way I see it is, if either of you plan on making this incredibly dysfunctional relationship - if you can even call it that - work, Sirius is going to have to break up with Marlene and you two are going to need to sit down to a long, sex-less dinner and just... talk. And stop all the lies - from both of you." He gave them both hard, serious looks.

Raking a hand back through her tangled mess of hair, Hermione was shaking her head. "Remus is right, Sirius. We're dysfunctional, but with no chance of functioning. You know that."

Crossing his arms, Sirius said, "I don't think that's true. We've made it work before, we can again."

Leaning forward, Hermione propped her elbows on her knees and rubbed her temples. "I don't think you should break up with Marlene. I had no right just stepping into your life again, expecting us to somehow just..." She swallowed. "I don't know what I was expecting, really."

"And I shouldn't have expected you to just want to come back to me," Sirius admitted on a sigh. "I shouldn't have yelled at you, then kissed you... I fucked up."

Hermione nodded. "I did too."

Remus was watching closely and said, "Guys, I didn't mean do... this, I just meant get your shit together."

"Some things can't be fixed, Remus," Hermione said, her chest hurting. "Like you said, we have problems."

"But everyone has problems," Remus went on. "It doesn't mean you shouldn't try."

"I'm sure that Sirius cares very deeply for Marlene," Hermione said, looking up at the sandy-haired young man. "What happened before, in the kitchen, was probably a rush of... I don't know. A surge of hormones and nostalgia. It didn't mean anything. Right, Sirius?"

Sirius stared at his hands. The same hands that'd been roaming Hermione's soft, creamy skin only minutes ago. The same hands that had fully intended on making love to Hermione slowly and gently and to hold her after her first time and rub her back when the soreness settled in. He was going to take a nap with Hermione and when they woke up, he was planning on kissing her and leaving to go to Marlene's and confess everything and end it with her.

It wasn't hormones. It wasn't nostalgia. Sirius just wanted her back. But he was obviously going to have to prove that to her and he wasn't sure how yet. He wasn't sure if her could, in the end.

And Remus's words echoed deep in Sirius's skull. Hermione didn't deserve and idiot like Sirius.

Scratching his chin, Sirius nodded slowly and agreed, "Right. Didn't... mean anything."

Remus shook his head. This wasn't what he'd meant. He'd just wanted them to actually try for once instead of all of this complicated hate and jealously games nonsense. He'd wanted them to be happy...

But he wondered if maybe they were making the right choice.

Their conversation ended with Sirius retrieving his shirt, pulling it on with his jacket, lighting a cigarette and leaving, but only after he gave Hermione a hug goodbye. She'd returned the hug and Remus couldn't help but feel his own sadness for the solemn expressions they both wore.

Remus left as well, ruffling Hermione's hair lightly, and walking out into the streets of Diagon Alley. And he considered what might have happened had he not decided to drop by Hermione's at that moment. Would they have slept together? Would they have regretted it? Or would they have smiled and laughed and been happy? Would one bout of honest lovemaking solved their problems, put things into perspective, made them strive to mend their troubles?

Looking up at the front-facing window of Hermione's flat, Remus waved at the girl standing in the window. Hermione smiled and waved back, but even he could see, her smile never really touched her eyes.

...~oOo~...

Challenge: 1. Favorite part and line? 2. What will happen between Sirius and Marlene? 3. Will Hermione still leave?

~ So Long And Thanks For All The Fish ~