A super long chapter if I say so myself. I really hope you enjoy!
Gwen was happy once they'd gotten into a plane instead of a boat. She was wondering if her entire journey towards Ireland was by boat or whether she went by plane as well. She probably would never know. The only thing she knew was that whatever was in the sedative, it fucked up her cognitive skills and her perception of time.
The time on board of the cargo plane was killed by playing poker, soft talking and drawing. Gwen hated it when she suddenly drew Patrick's face again, or Sean's. She was hoping she would never ever meet another Sean again, just for his sake. Apparently all the Sean's she met, died. Something closer to truth was; they got killed in a horrible way.
Gwen had kept that comment to herself, but it bothered her. Still. She had awoken from a nightmare a couple of times already, thank god nobody seemed to have noticed. Only Opie gave her a look once.
Gwen hoped she would never ever had to return to Ireland ever again. The place was now filled by shitty memories. The landscape was beautiful and it seemed to be fun to explorer by bike, but the memories would forever leave a stain on the beautiful place.
The trip back home had a sour note. Tara apparently was being hold as a hostage by a man named Salazar. Jax tried to enjoy being with his son, but she could see the worried look that sometimes appeared on his face. She didn't blame him. She just wondered when this shit storm would be completely over.
Jimmy still didn't get what he deserved. Gwen had no doubt about the fact that they would try to bring him down in a different way. She just hoped they would stay safe.
They'd gotten a warning that they would be landing soon. She felt anxious to see Tig again. And her brother. She wondered if they would be able to pick up the relationship from where they left. Gwen heard the story from Juice how her brother and Tig beat each other up the other day. It made her smile.
Gwen apparently disappeared the day when Kozik wanted to get patched in together with Happy. Herman had started the fight in the clubhouse. He started another fight after Tig had called church, because she had disappeared.
To be honest Gwen hadn't even noticed that the Tacoma patch of Happy was now replaced with Redwood. She was happy for Happy, that he joined Samcro. He was good member to keep around and someone who made her feel safe.
"You okay?" Chibs asked as he got seated beside her. Gwen nodded. "How's your shoulder?"
"Still hurts a little. I think it will keep like that for a while."
"The wound is gonna scar though. Sorry about that," he said. Gwen shrugged her shoulders.
"I was so stupid not to take immediate care of it. I will be able to cover it up though."
The pilot gave another warning that they would be really starting the landing now, making Gwen smile. Chibs grinned. He got a pretty good idea of how she was feeling.
The van rode unto the parking lot and she fumbled with the ends of her sleeves. The car stopped and the doors were opened by Tig. He welcomed his brothers. Gwen slowly stood up from the back and carefully walked over to him, giving him a shy smile.
"Come here," he told her. He cupped her cheeks with both her hands and kissed her. Gwen grinned against his mouth and returned the kiss with the same kind of passion if not more. Suddenly whistles were heard around them and they carefully broke their kiss.
Gwen could feel her cheeks turning red when they started applauding. Tig wrapped an arm around her shoulder.
"I'm glad to have you back," he murmured in her ear.
"I'm glad to be back with you," she said with a smile, hoping she wasn't too forward. Tig apparently liked the comment and gave her a kiss on her cheek.
She searched the crowd and saw her brother standing there, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Gwen let out a small laugh and walked to him.
"I still don't get it," he said giving her a hug. Gwen smiled up at him.
"You don't have to," she said. "Nice eye," she said pointing to his left eye. Her brother grumbled something inaudible, making Gwen laugh. "Thanks for trying to defend my honor though."
"You better be grateful sis. I expect a three course meal soon," he told her. "And an explanation."
"Sure and I can't have you ordering take outs all the time," she said with a cheeky grin.
"Come one guys! Church!" Clay called. Herman quickly followed inside. Gwen turned around and looked at Tig.
She gave him a kiss and let him walk inside after that. She noticed the looks she was getting from some croweaters, but she ignored them for now. It was time to get Tara back.
The whole town was shaken-up after Tara managed to get out together with Hale. Thank god Tara was now safe and the family was complete. Throughout the day she slept most of the time. She had taken a quick shower, in her brothers room.
One of the croweaters was so kind to give her some body wash that wasn't for men. It was nice to feel some sort of clean again.
Gwen sat at the bar and enjoyed her drink, waiting for church to be over. "So how do you like prospecting so far?" Gwen asked the prospect name Phil. He stumbled over his words at first. But soon he took a calming breath.
"So far so good," he muttered. Gwen smiled. He was nervous to talk to her.
"Just use your brains and you're gonna be fine," she told him. Suddenly the door flung open and Tig quickly stalked outside. Gwen took another sip from her whiskey and decided to let him be. If he wanted to talk to her, he would have walked over to her.
Not much later both doors went open and they all walked outside of the chapel. She looked at her brother who had a frown on his face. "No?" Gwen asked.
Herman shook his head and Phil quickly poured him a glass of whiskey which he downed in one go. Her brother went out of the door as well. Gwen sighed. Phil was already pouring drinks for everybody, before he made his way back to Gwen.
"What's wrong?" Gwen asked as she saw her brother grabbing a bottle of Jack when he walked back inside a couple of minutes later. He turned around and faced her.
"He still can't trust me after what happened with Missy," he said softly. "He's outside, you might wanna talk to him."
Gwen was about to walk out of the clubhouse when her brother called after her. "Wait Gwen," he called walking up to her. She turned around and he held out a seemingly new pair of keys in his hands. "Got your locks changed," he said.
Gwen gave him a sad smile and hugged him tight. "Thank you," she said. She let go of him and looked up at her brother.
"Go get to your man," he said softly, so only she could hear. She beamed him a smile and walked out of the clubhouse.
She looked over the parking lot that was free from people, everybody seemed to be inside, but Tig. He sat on the swing set that was built for Abel. She walked into the secluded playground and sat on the empty swing beside Tig.
He looked at the picture he was holding in his hands. It was a picture of him and Missy. Gwen looked at him. It took a couple of moments before Tig would look at her and tugged the picture away. "Your brother send you?" he asked, his tone was off.
Gwen took a deep breath before answering. "What is between you and my brother, is between the two of you. Not me. I'm here for you, not because of my brother." Her voice was a little bitter.
"Sorry," he said after another moment of silence. "I should've said that."
"It's okay," she replied.
"I know we need Kozik in our ranks, since we're going inside soon," he saw that Gwen halted her movement on the swing and looked at her shoes.
"Shit," she spat out and looked up into the night sky. Why the fuck wouldn't things go as planned? "I totally forgot. When?" she dared to ask. "How long?"
"In two days we got the bail hearing and we're facing hard-time. Probably up to fifteen years. Lowen might be able to let us do short time. But I think that ain't gonna happen," he said bitterly. Tig wasn't sure if he should give her hope. Jax plan needed to work. He didn't want to be the one to fuck it up by telling Gwen. "We probably will be back inside tomorrow already."
"Shit," she said again. Gwen felt her eyes starting to burn and soon her eyes began to water. "Nothing ever goes according to plan right?" she asked, wiping away the tears that did come through.
"What happened Gwen?" he asked. Tig's latest update was when he had spoken Gwen over the phone, but she never elaborated on what happened. And during the day he simply didn't have the time to catch up with her.
"Not here," she whispered. He nodded. "Not now." She stood up from the swing and looked over the parking lot. "I just wanna be with you right now."
Tig stood up from the swings and pulled Gwen close to him. He could tell she was trying to keep all her emotions inside.
"I can't ride," he said when he noticed her walking towards the bikes Gwen looked up at him with a frown. "They took away my license when I was creating a distraction for Clay and Gemma," he said. "Come on."
He guided her towards he clubhouse and hoped that everybody would mind their own business and wouldn't talk to them. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and they got into the clubhouse where Juice was getting a welcome home present from one of the croweaters.
Gwen didn't even look, but just looked at the hallways in front of her. Soon they entered Tig's room who locked the door behind him.
Gwen looked out of place. Her clothing didn't seem to fit the air around her. He could see she was trying to keep her emotions locked away. She didn't want to deal with them right now. He just hoped she would let them out soon.
He gently kissed her lips, she gently kissed him back at first, but soon it turned into a more needy kiss.
Gwen needed him. She needed to feel him. She needed to know she was safe. For now at least. Gwen stumbled against his bed and tried to peel off his cut. Tig helped her and removed his holster as well. Her hands flew towards the buttons of his shirt and Gwen started to undo them. He grabbed her hair and pushed her closer to him.
Their movements became more rushed and Gwen had a hard time undoing Tig's buttons. Her hands reached to his belt instead and unbuckled it.
Tig's tongue slipped into her mouth and was eagerly met by Gwen. He let go of her hair and unzipped the unfamiliar hoody that didn't seem to fit her quite right. He pushed it off her shoulders and she let it drop onto the floor.
He lowered himself, forcing Gwen to lay down on the bed, she looked up at him as she crawled further back onto the bed. He propped himself onto his forearms and looked down at her.
Gwen nervously bit her lip. She was out of breath, her hands went to the last couple of buttons that still needed to be undone, making his shirt fall loose around his body. Tig took of the piece of clothing and tossed in unceremoniously on the floor.
His blue eyes met hers, making her feel naked underneath him, while she was actually still dressed. It felt like he could see right through her. Gwen swallowed back her tears, she wanted to tell him everything that happened, but she didn't want to ruin the moment.
She didn't want to think about what happened, or what was going to happen soon. She just wanted to be. Be with Tig in this moment.
Tig leaned closer to her and kissed her neck. He licked her underneath her earlobe, making her back arch. Soon Gwen was moaning underneath him, having a hard time to stay still. When he pulled away her cheeks were flushed, the usual spark in her eyes seemed to have partly returned again.
"I missed you Gwen," he said. Gwen smiled up at him, her eyes locked with his.
Gwen looked up at him. She felt sad that they would be apart soon again. But the future didn't matter right now. Now did matter. "Show me," she said, looking into his eyes. Suddenly she saw that glint in his eyes again, that particular glint that drew her. Suddenly she felt herself becoming nervous, that feeling became even worse when his hands went to the hem of her shirt.
He slowly made a move to remove her top. Gwen winced as her elbow got stuck in her sleeve, but Tig carefully helped to get her shirt off. When her shirt finally hit the floor, Tig looked intently to her wound that was still covered by a piece of cotton and medical tape.
They slowly removed each other's remaining clothing. Once they were both naked, they took their time. They kissed each other. Gwen let her hands travel over his back, trying to get familiar with his skin again.
Tig locked eyes with Gwen, who pulled his head closer to her so she was able to slip her tongue into his mouth. "I missed you," she whispered before losing themselves in one another.
Gwen was running through streets. Brick buildings were on either side of the road. She kept on running and slipped into an alley. She was out of breath her head felt heavy, but she needed to keep going. She took another turn, but there was a dead end and a lifeless body laid on the ground. It was Patrick. She turned around and saw Jimmy standing in front of her. Blocking her only way out. Behind him stood a woman, Sean's wife. She held one of her children in her arms, the other one clung to her skirt. "You did this," the boy said, who had a striking resemblance with Sean. "You did this," he repeated and suddenly a bullet hole appeared in his forehead.
Gwen jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom. She didn't even take the time to turn the lights on as she emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet. She had no idea how long she was sitting there on her knees, trying to get everything out of her system, when she suddenly felt that her hair got pulled back.
"Easy babe, easy," he said softly. He let go of her hair for a moment and turned on the lights. He walked back to Gwen who now leaned against the wall, her knees hugged to her chest. Tig handed her a glass of water. She mouthed a small "thank you" as she took the glass from his hand. Gwen drained the glass of water in one go, before handing it back to Tig.
She wiped away some strands of hair stuck to her face. She felt hot and incredibly sweaty even though she was naked. Tig walked out of the bathroom for a moment and handed her a shirt. She pulled it on as he slid on the floor right next to her.
"You gonna tell me what that was all about?" he asked as he just let her be. Tig looked at Gwen who just stared ahead of her. He was afraid she would never respond until she looked at him.
"Just a bad dream, that's all," she muttered. Tig didn't buy it and gave her a long hard look.
"That wasn't just a bad dream darlin'," he said. "I know those dreams. You know that right?" She nodded and took a deep breath.
"Can we just go back to bed?" she asked. She looked tired. Very tired. He almost wanted to give in, but shook his head.
"No," he stated simply. "You gotta tell me what's going on."
"Then you need to get my brother. I ain't tellin' the same story twice. Sorry."
"Don't be sorry babe," he said. "I'll go get him. Get dressed."
Gwen followed him obediently and got out a pair of sweatpants out of his drawer without asking. He didn't really know how to feel about that, her snooping around his stuff. But he could imagine that she didn't want to walk around with the same clothing as she did when she arrived yesterday.
After both of them got dressed he walked out of his door and didn't even care to knock on Kozik's door and just flung it open. He was sitting on the edge of his bed as a croweater was working between his legs.
"Seriously asshole knock the next time!" Kozik yelled. "Get out!"
"No," Tig said calmly. "Gwen wants to talk to us both, so hurry the fuck up."
"You heard him," Kozik said as the brunette croweater got up and quickly walked out of the door. Tig watched her ass and thought about his experience with that girl, a while ago.
"She's good," he told Kozik as Kozik tried to get himself looking somewhat appropriate.
"Yeah well, gotta wait for next time I guess…" he said with a frown on his face. He followed Tig into his dorm where Gwen sat on the edge of the bed, biting her fingernails.
Kozik sat down on Tig's desk and Tig sat down on his chair, waiting for Gwen to begin. "What happened?" Kozik asked when he saw her puffy eyes.
Gwen bit her lip and took a deep breath. "I don't know where to start to be honest," she started. Her voice was hoarse and slightly wavering. "Like you two already know, Jimmy got me into Ireland, because he didn't want me to reveal where Abel really was, before he got his hands on the boy. I don't really get why he did that, but I guess we'll never find out. He could've killed me. That would've been a lot easier," she paused for a moment, looking at her hands that were placed in her lap.
Tig didn't miss the bitterness in her voice and neither did her brother who listened to her intently.
"My first location was a warehouse. Later on I got moved somewhere else. I had two people guarding me. Sean and Patrick. Sean left Patrick alone with me, because he needed to take care of his kid and help his wife out. I took the opportunity. I manipulated Patrick… I killed both of them. I strangled Patrick with his own T-shirt. I shot Sean a couple of times. He shot me in the shoulder. I put a bullet into his head."
She was trying to distance herself from the situation, Tig could hear that. However her voice was wavering towards the end of her sentence.
"Then I blew up the apartment."
"You what?" Kozik exclaimed.
"I blew up the apartment by disconnecting the gas and all…" she said with a meek voice. "I wanted to get rid of some of the traces."
Saying that he was surprised was maybe the wrong word. He had to admit he was a little bit impressed. He shouldn't be. She shouldn't have gone through all that shit. Not alone. She could've gotten hurt or killed. It made him angry, knowing she had to do that.
"Jesus," Kozik muttered. Rubbing his face with both his hands. "You talked about this with anyone?" Gwen nodded.
"Yeah Hap. He kinda put things in perspective," she said softly.
"How do you mean, put things in perspective?" Tig asked. Gwen took another deep breath and he could finally see the tears breaking through.
"He told me I did well, but I-I just feel bad… I mean I killed them. I shouldn't have. I took a way a s-son, a husband who was also a father of at least two children. I fucking ripped away pieces from people's lives. I-.." tears started sliding down her cheek.
Kozik stood up and walked over to her. He sat down on the bed next to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "It's okay," he muttered against her hair. "I'm proud of ya Gwen, even though you feel like shit. You did what you had to do. We're both happy that you're back. I was worried about you."
Gwen started crying out loud again. Tig had a weird feeling inside. He knew he would go back inside today. He would have to leave her behind. Alone. She had to deal with her shit alone. It was unfair. She'd been there for him and he wanted to do the same for her, but it was downright impossible.
He was going to jail. He didn't deserve her. Tig rubbed his face, trying to keep himself under control. He was angry with himself. Because of him she got hurt and had to kill. How could he have been that stupid to pursue a relationship with her? Yes he had let her come to him, because he doubted that he would be capable of being in one.
All the relationships he'd been in ended up in a total disaster and another one could be added to the list. That's the reason why he didn't do relationships. Tig had his occasional lay, if not every day, with sweetbuts, croweaters or hookers. It all seemed to be enough, but suddenly there was Gwen.
She annoyed him. It didn't even matter what she did, she just annoyed him whenever she just walked into a room. At first he didn't know why she pissed him off without doing anything, but later on he realized that it was because she was somehow unattainable.
He had been jealous. He realized that once Juice said that he wouldn't mind having Gwen in his bed. He couldn't keep himself from making Juice believe that he indeed slept with her. It had been a dick move.
They both had needed proof. Proof that they could be together. He was still stunned by the kind of patience she had shown him when he broke down, when he still doubted his own intentions. He had made her wait more than she had let him wait.
Tig snapped himself out of his thoughts when Gwen stopped crying and wiped away her tears. "I gotta talk to Tig for a bit, alright?" Gwen nodded. Kozik stood up from the bed and Tig followed him out of the room.
Kozik rubbed his face once they closed the door behind them.
"She's a mess," Kozik said.
"Yeah I know." He knew she was a mess. And both of them knew that she was in an even worse condition than she was willing to show.
"I gotta go to her house, get her some clothes and stuff. I'm gonna talk to Hap later. He might know more," Kozik said, he almost was about to walk away when he turned around and face Tig. "I know you're gonna go back inside today, but if Jax' plan is gonna work out and you're gonna do short time and you two will be back together, when you get out… What I'm tryin' to say is, if I ever see her hurt like that again, because of you… You and I are gonna have a problem."
Tig nodded. "I got it brother," he told him. Kozik nodded before walking away. Tig leaned against his door for a moment and got greeted by a croweater who came walking out of Bobby's room. Tig opened his door once again and saw Gwen lying on his bed.
He locked the door behind him and walked over to her and laid down beside her, pulling her back into his chest. He kissed the top of her head and held her close. "I'm sorry you had to do that," he told her. "I wish I could stay and help you, like you helped me."
"But that ain't gonna happen," she said. Her voice hoarse.
"No," he said simply. "That ain't gonna happen."
"What's gonna happen today?" She asked.
"Jimmy," he decided to tell her. "I can't tell you a lot more, we need to play this out very carefully." She remained silent and deep in thought.
He scooped her up and she let out an almost unnoticeable squeal. He slowly carried her in bridal style towards the bathroom. He sat her down onto the tiny counter next to the sink and turned on the shower.
He gently kissed her lips, his hands in her hair. His hands went to the band of his sweatpants that she was wearing and carefully tugged them down together with her panties. Her breath hitched when both item dropped on the bathroom floor.
Tig kissed her lips, she returned it with greed and her tongue slipped into his mouth. His hands caressed her thighs. He had missed her. And he would've to miss her again. He pulled away from the kiss and removed her shirt. Tig carefully removed her bandage and looked at the scar that was forming on her left shoulder.
Gwen looked at him intently, her eyes betrayed her insecurity. Tig carefully kissed her shoulder, avoiding the scar. He would make sure he would clean that up for her after their shower. He kissed the hallow of her throat and slowly moved down to her breasts.
Gwen let out a moan once his tongue touched one of her nipples, but he wasn't done yet. He moved further down and slowly spread her legs. Her breath hitched. She locked eyes with him, no words needed to be exchanged.
Tig closed his eyes once he buried his face into her pussy. Gwen grabbed him by his hair and pushed him closer as he started to pleasure her between her thighs.
She let out another moan, her breath was becoming irregular. He looked up at her for a moment, her head was tilted back, her eyes closed in bliss. He quickly focused back on what he was doing and enjoyed her taste.
Suddenly she grew still for a moment and let out a low moan. He realized that an orgasm caught her by surprise. Gwen pulled him back up by his hair and kissed his mouth. Tasting herself on his lips.
The bathroom was clouded by the damp of the shower. Her hands went to the hem of shirt and pulled it over his head. Tig worked on his belt and soon his jeans fell onto the floor as well. He quickly got rid of his boxers as well and lifted Gwen up from the counter.
She wrapped her legs around his middle and let herself be carried to the shower, that was slightly too hot. Tig opened the cold tab a bit more and soon the water had a more enjoyable temperature. He carefully set her down back on her feet.
Gwen pulled his face closer to her and she kissed him as her other hand went between his legs. He already was hard for a while, but her touching him there only made him grow harder. "Fuck me," she whispered with a husky tone in his ear as she pulled away from him for a moment.
Tig let out a groan. That woman could probably make him do anything when she used that voice. Before he could lift her up, Gwen turned around and leaned with her for arms against the tiles of the wall.
Gwen looked over her shoulder towards Tig and licked her lips. Maybe on purpose, but he honestly thought that she did it unconsciously, which was even a bigger turn on for him. He saw how the drops of water slowly trickled down her body and over the rounding of her ass.
"Fuck," he muttered.
"That's what I'm waiting for," she said with a smile.
He grinned back at her as she pulled her hair over one shoulder and kept looking at him. There she was. Some humor had returned. He took a step closer to her, his hands traveling over her back, over her ass.
She whimpered underneath his touch and let out a low moan. "You're so beautiful," he whispered in her ear before slowly moving inside of her. He let out a groan in bliss. He continued to move inside of her when she started to meet his thrusts. "Somebody is eager," he stated. Gwen gave him a look from over her shoulder. He stopped moving.
Gwen let out a desperate sigh. "Please," she begged.
"Please what?" Tig decided to ask, trying to annoy her a bit.
"Please fuck me Tig."
"Not like this," he told her. He moved out of her and turned her around. Her breath hitched as he lifted her up against the wall. She wrapped her legs against his waist and held on tight. Tig guided himself between her folds and started fucking her against the wall.
Gwen let out a loud moan and leaned her forehead against his shoulder when picked up the pace. She felt herself losing her mind. She clawed at his back, trying to get some grip. Tig grunted in her ear. Both lost their sense of time when they felt the shower turning a little bit colder.
Tig started to move a bit quicker and was able to burry himself deeper inside of her when she started to meet his thrusts once again. Both were panting, moaning, muttering incoherent things to each other. "I- I'm so close," she suddenly muttered in his ear.
"You can hold on for a bit?" he asked between his grunts. He felt her nod against his shoulder, but when she started to lick him underneath his earlobe he was about to lose it as well. "Never mind," he grunted.
That seemed to be enough for her as she loudly called out his name. He could feel her clench around him and he lost it as well. Suddenly she started laughing and Tig gave her a look.
"Just wow," she said with a smile as she slowly came down from her high. Tig grinned and kissed her.
The rest of their shower was rather rushed, afraid that the shower would even turn colder. However Tig took the time, helping her rinse out her hair.
She let out a soft moan as he started to massage her shoulders, carefully avoiding the wound on her shoulder. When she shrugged him off, he turned off the shower and kissed her on her lips.
She was about to walk out of the shower when Tig stopped her. Gwen gave him a confused look for a moment, but kept her mouth shut when she saw he was trying to form his thoughts into words. "I might be a little late, but I realized… I never said that I loved you. Maybe once, but that ain't enough. I love you," he saw her eyebrows furrow a bit, but she kept silent. "And it might be too late, and-,"
Gwen shut him up and kissed his lips. "I love you too," she said as she pulled away from him.
Gwen was dressed in the clothes her brother had picked up from her home. The clubhouse was packed with members, friends, family and she finally saw Tara again. She had given the brunette a hug and a small smile before she got seated at a table.
She was going to face a difficult time as well, since she was pregnant and Jax was going back to prison. Tara could use a friend and Gwen decided she would be there for her when the time was there. Laughter erupted from a table.
Gwen sat down at a table and played with her food for a bit. "You're not gonna eat that?" Tig whispered in her ear. "Don't tell me you aren't hungry, cause I know you lost weight." He told her. He placed a kiss against her neck and sat down next to her. "Plus you don't wanna piss off Gemma."
That made her laugh. Gwen smiled at him before taking a bite from her scrambled eggs. "I'm gonna miss having breakfast with you," she admitted.
"Which part?"
"The part where you eat me out," she managed to say without blushing. Tig looked at her, his mouth hanging open a bit in surprise. Gwen let out a chuckle.
She hadn't noticed that Phil was standing behind them and he almost dropped the pot of coffee, before pouring some more coffee into their cups.
"Hey, Lyla got something she wants to say," Opie announced to the crowd.
"We're getting married!" She exclaimed and held her hand up in the air, showing off her ring. The crowd erupted in cheers and Gwen walked over to Lyla.
"Congratulations girl," Gwen said as she hugged Lyla. "I'm so happy for you."
'Thank you," she said with a smile, showing off her ring.
Suddenly it seemed like a normal party, with normal people. They were normal people, but they just did things that didn't really fall under the normal category.
Gwen congratulated Opie and made sure she had a shot in her hands when they brought out their toast on the couple.
Gwen entered her home with her new keys for the first time later that day. She hated to see how Tig was taken away together with all the other men. Jax had ratted. Or that was how it seemed. She genuinely thought he tried to do the right thing. Now he was going to die in a prison cell.
Gwen felt scared when she felt the rage surging through the group once it became clear that Jax had been doing Stahl's dirty work. Stahl had given Gwen her typical smirk when they placed Tig into the truck. How badly she wanted to wipe away that fucking facial expression of her face.
Still it was weird. I'm done listening to dead men. She still wondered what that meant. Gwen thought it had to do with JT. But who knew? Her insides churned. She wanted to cry, but right now she was just too empty to do so.
She already found it difficult when the rode off to Jimmy and she wasn't able to help. Tara had taken that task on her and she could understand why.
However things didn't work out. Jimmy was now back into the hands of the ATF and he wouldn't meet the kind of faith Gwen wanted him to.
She had no idea how long she would have to miss Tig. She probably just should move on and forget about everything. It was good for how long it lasted, but there wasn't really a scenario with a future in which she would be together with Tig. Unless they were really doing short time instead of long time. But would she even wait for him if he was doing short time? Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.
She just needed to cherish the moments she had with him. She needed to move on now. Gwen truly felt happy this morning. Knowing that she had two people who truly cared about her, here in Charming.
Gwen held the phone in her hand and doubted whether she should call Julia. Maybe it was the time for Gwen to leave Charming for a bit, to find out what she needed to do in order to get her life back on track. After a couple of minutes she finally hit the call button.
"Gwen? Seriously what took you so long to call me!" Julia yelled over the phone. "I was worried about you!"
Gwen smiled. She did care about her. "I'm sorry Jules, a lot of shit happened in the past couple of months. Every day it hit a different level of crazy… I just need to get away from here for a bit."
"You know you're welcome here anytime. How long do you plan on staying?" she asked. There was no doubt in her voice. Julia was determined. She would be there for Gwen.
"A month? Maybe two… I dunno. I need to figure some things out."
"You just get over here alright?"
"Yeah, I'll deliver my commission tomorrow and then I'll head up to Portland."
"Good, see you soon hun. Take it easy." Gwen wanted to say thank you, but Julia already hung-up.
Gwen looked over to the piece she made for Saint Thomas. It wasn't her best piece, but she just hoped that her client would be happy with it. She walked towards her bedroom and started packing her suitcase. Gwen felt actually a little bit guilty for leaving, but she had no idea how else she was going to go back to normal.
Suddenly her cellphone went off and Gwen picked it up "Hello?" she asked. She immediately regretted her choice when she heard Anton's voice.
"Maybe next time, when somebody says it's important that you call them back. Call them back," he snapped.
"Sorry, I just had a lot on my mind," Gwen replied, already feeling her insides beginning to churn.
"Yeah, whatever," Anton said with a tone telling her that he didn't believe a thing she said.
"So what is so important?"
"Dad has been mentioned in a police investigation by some drug dealer. The police are now investigating what kind of role he played and where he went," Anton said.
"Yeah so? I don't want to have anything to do with him. I mean… we all know that he was into something shady. And if it can be confirmed by the police… I am glad he's gone."
She heard Anton give a mirthless laughter.
"Really? Do you know how hypocritical you sound right now? You look up to Herman who is in a gang, but you already condemn our father? Get a grip!"
Now it was Gwen's turn to let out a chuckle. "Fuck you Anton. Really. You weren't there when our so called father started to get abusive towards mom. Thank god I never gave him the opportunity to take it out on me, but it was damn close a couple of times." Anton remained quiet. "Look I get it that you look up to him. But you don't know him, like I know him. Thanks for calling me, but I don't need to know. I really don't care."
"I see."
"Good."
"Where did you move? I drove by your house the other day and suddenly there is somebody else living there."
"I really gotta go now Anton. Take care." Gwen immediately hung up the phone and started pacing through her house.
She pushed the news aside and started packing. She needed to go somewhere else. A place that wasn't called Charming. She had the feeling that things would quiet down a bit now they were inside, however she just couldn't stay. She needed her space.
Gwen walked into her bedroom and started packing. She wanted to be out of Charming as soon as possible. She would just give Saint Thomas the commission, hoping they would agree with her it was finished.
She had one suitcase full with clothing and one crate full with art supplies. Maybe it would be wise for her to hop by Bruce, telling him where she was with her art project. She wondered if she would have to choose another theme, or maybe look around in Portland for willing participants. Gwen decided she would catch Bruce on her way out of town. It was on the route anyhow.
She dragged her suitcase into the living room after she closed it. She stood nailed to the ground when she heard a bike. Gwen slowly walked her way over to her front door and saw her brother stepping off his bike. He looked tired. Relieved. He stepped into her house and she closed the door behind him.
"Sit down," he told her. Gwen nodded and sat down at her spot at the kitchen table.
"What is it?"
Herman gave her a tiny smile and sat down in front of her. "They're doing short time. Jax never ratted. We all knew what he was doing. You were at the garage right when they picked the guys up?" Gwen nodded. "We killed Stahl and also the deal that would bring the club down. But kept the deal that will give them short time and parole within 14 months if they behave. Jimmy is dead too."
Gwen's jaw dropped. Herman looked around and saw her suitcase standing next to the dresser. "You gonna leave?" he asked. Gwen nodded.
"Just for a while. I need to get things back on track," she said softly, feeling bad about leaving. Apparently her brother had noticed that she felt guilty and grabbed her hand.
"I get that," he said. "Just don't do anything stupid and just come back alright? I missed you. You gonna head to Portland?"
"Yeah, I'm gonna stay at Jules', need to work on my art. Figure out some sort of a game plan."
"I understand if you want to leave for good. Just tell me, alright?"
"I'm not gonna leave for good. I think. I just need to sort shit out. I can't do it here. I just can't. Maybe I'm not cut out for the life. Maybe I just don't belong here."
"I think you underestimate yourself. Most would've run already. You didn't and stayed. You might not see it, but you belong here."
Gwen felt her eyes starting to burn once again and she wiped a tear that had escaped from her eyes. "Thank you," she whispered.
The end of this monster chapter. I really hoped you enjoyed. Please leave me a review, telling me what you think (:
