A/N: I don't own Dragon age.

Merrill the master of sarcasm.

(The above statement is sarcastic.)

All I wanted was a chance to say,

I would like to see you in the morning.

Rolling over just to have you there,

Make it easier for a little bit longer.

From The Fear by Travis.

"So how is he?"

"How is who at what?" I asked Isabella as she smirked up at me from her designated haunt at the bar.

"How's Fenris beneath the sheets?" she asked. I felt myself turn painfully red.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I lied retrieving the round from the bartender.

Isabella laughed. She was pissing loving this.

"Oh c'mon Fen' Harel, kiss and tell. Anyway no one can hear us here," Isabella glanced across at Fenris who was trying hard to pretend he wasn't listening.

"Well if you must know, he's very disappointing. He grunts all the time, doesn't believe in any foreplay and is excessively unimaginative. Varric was far better."

"What!" Fenris snapped angrily.

I just laughed.

The world felt different at the moment. Somehow brand new, as if the sun had only been born today. I knew for a fact that the world hadn't changed at all, but I had. It looked different now I was looking at it through different eyes.

Fenris' POV:

I watched as she leaned in to whisper in Isabella's ear keeping her eyes on me the entire time. Little minx. I tried to scowl but a smile kept creeping in instead.

"Fenris," I snapped back into focus. Hawke had been talking to me again.

"I'm sorry Hawke," I apologized, hoping he hadn't followed my line of sight but of course someone else had.

"He was too busy staring at Fen' Harel," Merrill smiled sweetly. Blasted blood mage and her beady bloody eyes.

"I wasn't," I growled hoping not to be put through yet another round of teasing from Kirkwalls murderous flower child.

"You were. I saw you. You're always making goo goo eyes at her when her backs turned," Merrill sighed almost wistfully.

"I do not make goo goo eyes!" I retorted, glaring at her.

"You do! Huge great goo goo eyes. The high dragon of all goo goo eyes," she continued regardless.

"I do NOT make..."

"I think it's quite sweet really," she interrupted me; I felt my jaw clench, "Aww Fenris is in looovvvveee."

"Yes of course Merrill, you're the only one for me and this was a scheme to make you jealous," I spat sarcastically but of course the sarcasm was lost on Merrill.

She stared at me in confusion.

"Oh Maker, no," I groaned.

"I'm quite surprised by this Fenris. I'm flattered but you're not my type and even if you were it'd be unfair on poor Fen' Harel."

I don't think anyone had ever described Fen' Harel as 'poor Fen' Harel' before. Even after all that mess with her father three years ago.

"Yes Merrill I've always had a strong attraction for mages. Blood mages being by far my favourites."

Merrill gave another confused look before Hawke had to describe the concept of sarcasm to her for both our sakes. Their was some truth to what she was saying though. I couldn't take my eyes of Fen' Harel.

"How in Andraste's flaming tits did she manage that?" Fen' Harel mused as I pulled her home. She wasn't drunk at the moment just unsteady on her feet. The elf couldn't hold her drink, it was a well known fact yet she still insisted on attempting to keep up with Varric through sheer stubborn determination. I had to admit I wasn't exactly stone cold sober myself.

"She must have some form of...of...of device somewhere," Fen' Harel schemed. I was content to let her talk; she was in one of those moods. It would have taken the Archdemon itself to shut her up now.

"Or an accomplice. Yes! A co-conspirator, maybe Merrill. I could see Merrill breaking under Isabella's wiry, wiry charms. We must comfort her at once."

I smiled to myself as Fen' Harel plotted away completely oblivious to the real world. She was dear to me. That night when...it was difficult to explain what had happened but something had definitely shifted. I'd never been that close to someone, not physically and not emotionally, and I'd never felt someone that close to me. It was as difficult to explain as it was to sort out how I felt. But she had been there with an unwavering loyalty. For the first time since I could remember, I didn't feel alone anymore.

"Are we going home?" she asked.

"Yes."

"You know Fenris," she looked up at me with huge eyes and a wicked grin, "I'm feeling ever so cold."

"Is that so?" I asked mimicking her smirk. No one was like Fen' Harel in bed. An image floated into my head of her barely clothed on my bed, eyes unfocused in deliria and breathing heavy and hungry. I loved the way that I was the only one capable of getting her to that state, and the only one who ever would. It was the same dark, animalistic urgency she awoke in me.

"Yes, I'm so cold."

"We can't have that."

"No, we can't," she smiled brushing her lips against mine. Skin to skin contact was one of the best things about being alive. I could feel her heart beating through her skin, feel the blood running through her veins, feel her living. As always there was that current crackling underneath my skin when we touched.

"I better get back to the estate then and get the fire going maybe see if Anders is in," she laughed slightly as she broke the kiss and turned towards the direction of the Hawke Estate.

I growled in frustration, grabbing her wrist and dragging the laughing Fen' Harel into the mansion. I found that I was laughing too.

There were no nightmares when I slept. I dreamt of Trevinter but this time without the blood. I dreamt of wine drenched sunlight, flashes of tiny, children bodies as they danced and played in a fountain weathered green and beige by the heat and water. I dreamt of warmth, of a mother singing me to sleep and a world light with only a child's worries. I dreamt of me, a younger me without scars and a girl with bright hair playing.

"C'mon," she smiled pointing towards a partially opened door where an elegant woman stood, waiting for us patiently, her face blocked from my view as she shielded her eyes from the tender sunlight. I felt more than saw her smile affectionately. Mother. I wished I could see her eyes.

"Leto," the girl called laughing.

Her voice was like some far away sound as if she'd called to me from the other side of a cave. I felt myself look behind me. And there was Fen' Harel there, as I'd always imagined her as a child. She was barefoot, clothes slightly too big, her jaw and nose not yet strong but softer in childhood. The same eyes though, the same startling blue, and the same smile but slightly more open and carefree in that younger face. I smiled, offering her a hand and felt her palm slip against mine, the fingers clasping round to grip me tightly.

"C' mon," the girl called. I suddenly remembered her name. Varianna. My sister.

Just as I began to run towards that open door, pulling Fen' Harel behind me I awoke. The memories began to scatter back to the darker unknown parts of my mind but the warmth remained. It filled my belly like the exact emotion I'd been trying to capture every night with fire and wine. A bitter sweet mix of love and longing, happiness and sadness. This wasn't the first time I'd dreamt of Varianna. Hadrianna's words had spread like poison, eating me up with the thought that I could maybe know something of who I was. Finding her hadn't been easy but at last I'd managed to. But now I had the information I was torn by the indecision to act on it. It felt as though I was standing on a cliff edge and it was my decision whether to leap or not.

"Hrmm," Fen' Harel murmured in her sleep, pulling me back from dark thoughts.

There she was again, pulling me from the cliff edge or preparing herself to jump with me. I settled back, feeling her eyelashes tinkle my neck and her chest rising and falling with each breath. We weren't constantly touching one another like Anders and Hawke but we had our moments. While Hawke and Anders trawled Lowtown, caressing each others faces, pecking each others cheeks and holding each others hands, me and Fen' Harel had this. Just sleeping. It wasn't that I didn't care but both of us seemed adverted to hanging off one another all the time, saving times like this for privacy. She was so determined not to be one of those mushy people. But Fen' Harel had always been determined when she wanted something.

She could be like that sometimes. She was hard and emotionally cold as ice when you hurt her. She could be temperamental, suddenly changing and was one of the most stubborn people I'd ever met. It took forever for her to even consider trusting you, and if you let her down just once she'd doubt you for what felt like forever. But it was her faults that assisted her strengths. When you did eventually gain her trust Fen' Harel was loyal, almost completely so. She was kind, alot kinder than people first expected, to the people she cared for and a sucker for a charity case. She was strange but always made me laugh because it seemed that life was barely serious to her outwardly.

Fen' Harel frowned and muttered in her sleep. I wondered what she was dreaming. I wondered what she was thinking. I wondered if she dreamt about me like I dreamt about her. I wondred if she thought about me like I thought about her. Or most importantly if she felt about me like I felt about her. I wasn't sure what it was called but it was like drowning without the pain, totally beautifully submerged.

Tomorrow, I decided as if almost from nowhere, tomorrow I'd ask Hawke.

"You asked to see me Knight Commander?"

"Yes Ser Cullen, I'm sure you're aware of our schedule by now and what I expect of you," the Knight Commander cast one steel eye casually over the Templar. She flicked open a book and seated herself, indifferently scanning the words before her.

"Yes of course, Knight Commander my report," he said staring straight ahead, hoping that his lack of eye contact suggested rigid discipline (something he did posses) rather than his reluctance to meet his superior's cutting gaze. She looked like what some imagined the Templar order would if incarnated. Stronge, noble, unyielding and indomitable but Cullen believed she lacked something. She lacked a kindness, a human compassion for the people they were ordered to protect. He was only beginning to see it now and it felt as if the blinkers prejudice and hatred had given him were finally shaking loose. However it didn't mean he was completely free yet.

"Well?" the Knight Commander asked slowly turning a page.

Cullen cleared his throat, "at first Knight Commander, we were unsure of her whereabouts..."

"What do you mean you were unsure of her whereabouts?" she interrupted Ser Cullen sharply.

"...well she is no longer residing at the Hawke Estate Knight Commander, but has in fact found lodging with someone else."

The Knight Commander chewed on this new information, pondering its effects and the possibility of it being the reason behind her own problem with the Templar weapon.

"Who?" she inquired.

"Another elf. He's one of Hawke's companions. They're thought to be lovers."

Meredith knew who he was speaking of. One of the two Hawke had brought into her office while his other companions waited outside. The silver haired elf who'd conveyed information about the escaped mage. Obivousily he wasn't the cause behind this.

"Are your men ready to detain Fen' Harel at my order Ser Cullen?"

"Yes, as always Knight Commander."

Cullen hesitated before asking, "Knight Commander if I may inquire?"

Meredith's head snapped up as if she'd just realized that he still hadn't left her office.

"Why the sudden urgency?" Cullen asked, unsure whether he had over stepped the mark.

"The subject has refused to continue with our previous arrangements. I told you when I first gave you the task that if this were to become the case, you were to detain her and bring her to my custody."

"Yes...but if I may be bold Commander, does she not have the option of a life of her own? Isn't that what the Maker granted to all of us? And we are here to serve the Maker."

Meredith's eyes raked Cullen with a cold distaste as if she had just come across something particularly troublesome.

"No, we are here to serve the people of Kirkwall foremost. The subject should not be considered as a ordinary person, she is not. If I were to command her to do so Ser Cullen she would rip open the throat of a baby. She is a weapon Ser Cullen, not a simple half breed elf. Now I have work to be done, you are dismissed."

Cullen bowed to his superior, her words ringing in his ears. "She is a weapon Ser Cullen." He remembered meeting her in the entrance of Hawke's Estate and for a minute he could believe it.

"Yes Knight Commander."

A/N:

Every time I write about Meredith I want to put an evil laugh in mid sentence :S .I know not much happened but I just wanted to make sure that I established that Fen' Harel and Fenris are in a relationship...even if it is a bit of a strange one. I hoped you liked it. I'm a bit worried that I might have made it too sweet for them both but they love each other and I wasn't sure how to write it while desperately worrying about losing their character -_- So feedback would be really welcome on this chapter please. Thanks for reading, I hope your enjoying it.

THANK YOU ALL! :D