Emily missed Carrie more than she cared to openly admit and the realization that her children were growing up and finding lives of their own made her wistful. She didn't dare share this with Nick since she was the one who had fought to let them explore their independence. Nick, she knew, would not understand; he would consider it a reversal on her part and a triumph on his.
Will spent more time with his uncle, Heath, and neither of them shared what they talked about. With Nick's reluctant approval, he also got a job one day a week at the public library and he loved that; he loved the responsibility and the independence; and he loved the exposure to all that written knowledge.
Tom, too, resumed his social life a few weeks after Victoria's death with his parents' blessing. There were a number of young ladies in the valley within his social circle though there wasn't a favorite – yet. Nick didn't seem to care what Tom did in town as long as he tended to his responsibilities at the ranch but Emily suspected he was involved in hijinks of a more adult nature than an occasional drink at a saloon. She didn't want to know but she was fairly certain Nick already did.
Daniel, too, seemed to spend more time at Heath and Sarah's helping Grace with whatever project she was working on. This was of little concern to Emily. With Leah in San Francisco, she knew Heath and Sarah appreciated having an extra kid around and, anyway, Daniel always seemed happy to see her when he came home.
Emily even missed Audra, though Audra had been a member of the household for a very short time. She had been an enormous help when the executive committee of the Cattlemen's Association met at the house. Emily knew she could have done it without Audra's help but the anxiety beforehand would have been unpleasant; Audra's help and reassurances had made the preparations almost fun. And Audra's social confidence had taken a lot of the pressure off Emily who always found large social events rather exhausting.
It was true, Emily reasoned, she did love time alone and away from people but all day, everyday, with only a four-year-old to keep her company was too much time alone. So she and Julia started to spend more time at the corral, helping Bertie and Florence with the wash and other chores, and they even rode out to bring lunch to Nick and Heath a few times when they were out riding fences.
In San Francisco, Carrie noticed herself standing back and observing more than participating and recognized this response as the same characteristic of her mother's that annoyed her so much but now she understood. It wasn't unwillingness to do as much as it was an ardent desire to understand. And Carrie wanted to understand everything that was happening around her.
San Francisco was overwhelming to her and there was just so much to take in, so much that was new to her, and she wanted to remember every detail. There were trips to Golden Gate Park, The Conservatory of Flowers, and the newly opened De Young Museum. They went to The California Academy of Sciences, which employed lady scientists, some of whom were friends of the family, and who came for dinner and talked with her and her cousins about their research.
Uncle Jarrod took the whole family on a tour of Chinatown, which seemed a city unto itself compared with Stockton's Chinatown.
There was a day trip on the train down to Palo Alto to visit the campus of the newly opened Stanford University as the guests of Mrs. David Starr Jordan, wife of the university's president. She explained to Carrie and Leah how the Stanfords lost their one son to typhoid fever and built the university in his memory for the children of California. They were insistent the university be coeducational from the start and non-denominational, as well. The afternoon ended with having tea with Mrs. Stanford herself. Carrie knew her father had mixed feelings about the Stanfords. Their politics and charitable efforts had redeemed them to some extent with Nick Barkley but Leland Stanford was, when all was said and done, a railroad "robber baron." Carrie said nothing and observed. She thought Mrs. Stanford was a very nice lady and a forward thinking one at that.
Then there was the visit to San Francisco's Hospital for Children (and nurses training school) where Jane Barkley sat on the board of directors and often helped when her daughters volunteered to entertain the young patients. Some of the nursing students introduced Carrie to those patients who needed the most cheering and not all of them were little children, some of them were her own age, and some of them had babies of their own. This was a world of sadness and deprivation she barely knew existed.
At the end of their visit to the hospital, Aunt Jane brought them to meet the founder and director, Dr. Charlotte Baker Brown. Dr. Brown was a kind but clearly very busy person whose eyes twinkled when she saw Vicky and Ellie. When Aunt Jane explained the purpose of Carrie and Leah coming to San Francisco, Dr. Brown's face softened into a gentle smile and she responded with enthusiasm and encouragement.
Aunt Jane seemed most excited to bring her sister-in-law and nieces to the Folsom Street home of her friend, Ellen Clark Sargent, president of the California Suffrage Association. There they had tea and were welcomed by the women present. Mrs. Phoebe Hearst was unable to attend, as was Jane's good friend, Emma Sutro Merrit, the daughter of the ailing mayor, and herself a physician. But Jane and Jarrod were hosting a dinner party the following evening and Dr. Merrit was expected to come then.
The guests at the Mrs. Sargent's tea asked Carrie about her home, about her hopes and dreams. Many of them were aware of her family's ranch and reputation and some commented on how fortunate she was to have opportunities other young women did not. This made Carrie think back on some the girls she met at the hospital: girls who only had a mother and the mother did menial work; girls whose parents were so poor they shared one room among many family members; and girls who were her own age, even younger, who were on their own without anyone in the world whatsoever.
The next morning, Carrie accompanied her Aunt Jane to a local charity which provided food and clothing to women and children in the neighborhood who would otherwise go without. Carrie stood back and observed the people who were there and listened to the stories they shared and saw the pain in their eyes.
Carrie had seen the edges of poverty back in Stockton but it was usually rural poverty and people made do. Her grandmother had been involved in helping the local orphanage and her mother helped raise money for various causes. She knew such hardship existed but she had never seen it before with her own eyes or heard it first-hand. And there was so much of it.
Her mother had given her a journal so she could keep a record of her trip to San Francisco. She thought she might record the sites she'd visited. Instead, she wrote nothing the first night, or the second. By the third night, she started to write down her impressions and feelings about what she had seen. Soon, she looked forward to writing it all down because the process of writing helped her to understand it better. It helped her understand herself better, too.
Nothing more had been discussed about divorcing Charles. Jarrod didn't want to pressure his sister but he was worried she hadn't asked him any questions about her legal options. The day following the dinner party with Dr. Merrit, as Jane and Audra were preparing to take the girls shopping, Audra approached her brother, and, standing tall and strong, said, "Jarrod, I want to divorce Charles on the grounds of adultery and cruelty."
"You're sure about this?" he said. "You know this will probably bring public scandal and you may not get custody of Charles, Junior."
"The scandal belongs to Charles and I think Charles, Junior is old and smart enough; he will understand."
Jarrod said nothing but looked at his sister and knew the Audra he knew long ago had returned. He smiled.
"Jarrod, I've never been so sure of anything in my life."
