Hey guys, sorry that I've taken so long to update, and I apologise for worrying any of you that I might not finish, that would be really wrong. So, slowly at least, I am going to finish this.
Sorry that I can't reply to all of your reviews, I'm not any less grateful and I promise to mention names and reply to any burning questions every few chapters, it just takes such a long time to write replies, and with all my school work I really don't have the time.
So anyway those are all my apologies, and I'm going to do my best to continue this, I promise!
Also, I apologise if these chapters seem a little weird, I wrote them a while back and didn't have time to post...
29. Fiction
Rock sat on the chair, shifting uncomfortably on the rough fabric and trying to mould his body comfortably against the metal frame. His tired eyes scanned the table in front of him, piled high with American magazines with pictures of the beautiful people living the scandalous life. He closed his eyes for a moment, he was so tired, but he was always tired lately, he hadn't slept properly since that night. He couldn't sleep without her. He could still picture her soft smile in his mind and hear the melodic sound of her voice, he could even still smell that cinnamon smell that seemed to waft from her chestnut hair.
A serious voice broke into his memories and his eyes widened. "Mr. Pyrite, I presume."
Rock nodded, looking up at the man who had spoken. He looked roughly the same as all the other doctors, dressed in a white lab coat, stethoscope thrown around his neck like a scarf and an I.D badge that stated his name: Dr. Phillips. The only difference between him and any of the other doctors was his shining bald head, what a misfortune to lose all his hair, probably stress induced.
"Your wife..."
"Girlfriend," Rock broke in, not knowing why he felt the need to clarify that, maybe it was just something to say to deter the news. He'd had nothing but bad news since that night a month ago when he had found his love spread out on the ground. He had of course panicked and found Hardy straight away and they had done what they could for her.
"Miss Silverstone's condition has not improved, she's comatose Mr. Pyrite, and there seems to be little chance of her waking up," He informed Rock professionally, how could he sound so calm when telling this news? Rock felt his heart sink, as it did every time he was told the exact same thing by every doctor who decided to check up on her. "However we will continue to keep her alive and do what we can."
"So there's a chance?" Rock asked hopefully and the doctor let out a deep sigh. He scanned his clipboard again, looking at her vitals and her brain scans.
"There appears to be no reason she shouldn't wake up, except she shows no sign of attempting to do so. But her brain is undamaged, a miracle from falling from that height," Dr. Phillips said, but the serious expression remained on his face. Miracle, that was what every doctor said it was, but Rock couldn't see how. "And merely a few broken limbs, she is practically healed; even her back seems to have mended nicely."
"So why won't she wake up?" He asked, his voice still desperate, his tired eyes pleading for some signs of hope.
"We can't tell, but we'll keep her alive for as long as we can." He promised. "You may see her now,"
As always after waiting in the waiting room, Rock would go and buy her flowers first, to replace the ones that had only been placed there the week before, it was a ritual that allowed him to brace himself. He arrived back at the big white door that marked her room, a bunch of coloured daisies in his hand. He stopped for a moment, breathing in the far too clean smell of hospital, and looking at the marker for the room. It had to be someone's idea of a sick joke to place her in this room, number 101, maybe this room was the reason for her illness... but she'd been in other rooms, with other numbers, and she still showed no signs of drifting back to the land of the living.
He pushed open the door, observing the light lavender walls with distaste; they were so pale they were almost white, as though to feign a jollier atmosphere. He avoided looking at Lumina for a moment, observing something else in the room, anything else in the room, but the room only contained the bed, a small dressing table on which he placed the flowers and a small painting of a simple flower; apparently this room was not meant to be viewed much by the occupant. He turned to face her, flinching as he always did at the sight of her pale body, looking almost dead. Her lips were so pale they were almost blue and her unkempt hair straggled around her face, thin hairs trailing over her tightly shut eyes, with grey bags surrounding them.
"Good morning honey," he said softly, placing a kiss on her cool cheek. "Rise and shine, sleeping beauty." He joked weakly, helping him to pretend that maybe she was only sleeping. The only thing to add to his fiction was the gentle rise and fall of her chest, as deep breaths still came to her.
"If you wake up I'll show you the flowers I bought..." He coaxed, but he knew it was no good, there was nothing he could do except talk to her. He took a seat in the chair next to her, surveying her small body with a deep sadness. Then his whole body was racked in a sob and the built up tears were let out.
Every visit was the same, he would arrive, make his little jokes, then cry his eyes out. Finally he would tell her everything that had happened, which was never much as his life now revolved around her vegetative half-life. Now Tim, Ruby and him had moved to the states, they were managing to make ends meet and pay for her hospital fees. They rented a small apartment, and each of them would work every day, mostly for the money but partly to take their minds of her. Ruby was the chef at a small restaurant called "the Spicy Dragon" and Tim worked as the assistant manager of some fast food restaurant. Meanwhile Rock was stuck as a life guard at some swimming pool, because apparently a trained life guard would be too expensive. But at least they had taught him some basic first aid, which meant that he wouldn't end up killing some poor drown victim.
Even with their busy new lives in the city, they missed the valley and they missed everything that their lives had once been. But Lumina was their life, and if she needed the very best doctors, that was what she would get, there was no way they were willing to let her go. At least the Pyrite family still received letters from Vesta letting them know roughly what was going on in the valley, but they were sure there was much more to speak of. Rock would tell Lumina what was going on, even if she wasn't listening or even hearing what he was saying, at least he felt he was helping her in some small way. But it was still hard to talk of life in the valley that he missed so much.
Celia giggled loudly, before covering her mouth quickly and hiding back beneath the fort she had made out of the bags of compost. Gustafa returned with her, kissing her to stifle a laugh.
"Shh, we don't want Vesta to hear," he whispered, stroking a hand through her chestnut hair that smelt suspiciously of drugs, weed to be precise, his favourite scent.
"No, no of course not," she whispered, shaking her head and suppressing another giggle. Then her face turned serious and her grey eyes seemed to turn darker, more of a dark brown colour. "Gustafa, do you ever feel... guilty?"
His smile faded and he converted to the solemn tone of the conversation, leaning back against a compost bag, his eyes meeting hers sternly. "All the time,"
She sorted out her hair again and buttoned up the last few buttons of her dress, glad that Marlin was away in town so that he wouldn't see her looking like this. "Then why are we doing this? I love Marlin and you love Nami..."
Gustafa looked down, thinking deeply. He had often reflected the answer to that question, whilst playing his guitar or sitting to watch the fluffy clouds stream across the sky as though racing playfully. But he couldn't quite discern an answer, of course he loved Nami, more than the world, and he'd rather die than hurt her. Yet he found her company somewhat... overpowering, everything she said was so deep and meaningful and everything about her was so striking. Even her thin, angular figure and her sharp blue eyes were harsh, yet beautiful in their extremity. It was what he loved about her, her stubbornness and her refusal to give in, her courage, even her silence was stunning; there was nothing he'd change about her.
But Celia was completely different, in personality and in looks. In place of Nami's boyish figure was a curvy yet slim figure and her soft, brownish-grey eyes held warmth in them, like the dark part of a flame. She was so caring, so loving and although she was not exactly deep, neither was she shallow. She was down-to-earth and she put others first, willing to compromise and allowing for talk about pointless nothings. Nami spoke when absolutely necessary, she glared at stupidity and even though she and Gustafa seemed joined at the soul, she was still unpredictable as the autumn weather. Around Nami he felt awed, complete and part of something bigger but with Celia he felt warm and cherished, he had fun. He knew Nami was his soul mate and if asked, he would always put her first, but he loved the time with Celia to take off the pressure.
"It's fun and somehow it makes me happy," came his answer, stating how meaningless their relationship was and yet showing he didn't want it to end. Celia nodded, she knew their relationship wasn't about love or any feeling that went deeper than a good time, and surprisingly she was okay with that.
She loved Marlin for his brooding ways and for his dependency on her, she loved feeling needed and like she was the only one who could cheer him up. She was a mother by nature and Marlin was in need of mother, Gustafa needed no such thing. Marlin was cold a lot of the time, his azure eyes reflected the deep blue depression of his soul, but she liked knowing she could warm him, and when he was warmed he seemed to glow, like light shining through a sapphire. He was strong too, not only physically but mentally, he had been through a hell of a lot and he had retained some wisdom so that he guided her a lot of the time, but she liked having someone's example to live by. She loved the fact that her husband was her role model and that she always felt safe and protected when she was with him, and loved. His love was a rare thing to receive, which was what made it extra special, like platinum.
Gustafa was the opposite, although he held wisdom, it was the sort that didn't guide or help in anyway, merely pointing out something you might now have noticed before. He was never brooding, merely calm and relaxed, he needed no one to care for him, because nature would do that for him. She didn't feel needed, not like with Marlin, and of course she didn't feel loved. Even if she did she would not consider it special, Gustafa threw his love around as though it were flowers, sweet to receive but not something you'd expect to hold onto, unless you had never before received some like Nami, who had taken his love and pressed it in the scrapbook of her heart. Gustafa didn't need her warmth, he was constantly at the temperature that he liked most and needed no warming, she knew she wasn't anything special to him, but they had fun and she liked that. She liked Gustafa because it gave her a break, a break from being responsible and living by rules and a break from being needed, she was wanted, but not compulsory.
"I feel the same," she replied, content with their understanding and placing a kiss to his lips. She knew that there would be consequences if they didn't give up this affair soon, but she would cross that bridge when they came to it.
Jack dropped the letter as though it was on fire, he had read it over for the eleventh time, it was yet another letter from Rock. Ever since the first one he had received, god knows how Rock had found out where he was (though the inn at Mineral town seemed to be where everyone went and wasn't exactly surprising), Rock had been mailing him more, commenting on Lumina's progress... or lack of it. Every letter Jack would burn after reading it thoroughly, wishing he could go to the States and see Lumina himself. But he knew it was the last thing anyone needed: the ex-boyfriend who had lost two lovers to the same murderer and had disappeared completely in their time of need and added more pressure to Lumina, yeah that'd be a real help. He scrunched the letter up in his fist, fighting back tears that never seemed to come.
"Another letter," the sunset haired innkeepers daughter stated after seeing his reaction. She wrapped a thin arm around him and pulled him into a rough hug, everything she did was a tomboyish thing.
"Should I go to America, Ann?" He asked her, as he did every time he received a letter.
"Hell no! And put them under more stress, wait till she wakes up!" Ann said, giving the reason she always did. Always concealing her true reason, she wanted him to stay, forever if possible.
"You're right Ann," he said with a weak smile. "Besides, I'd miss you too much." That comment spread a pink blush across her face, her eyes darting quickly to look at something else. He waited for a reply so she settled for her usual tomboyish punch on the arm.
"Aw shucks! Well sure me and Dad would miss the company too," she smiled, adding her father in there to take the personal feeling away. Jack smiled, he always found it cute how she would blush at every little joke he made about anything other than friendly feelings towards her. Truly he found that his feelings for her were definitely growing, but with his track record with women, it'd be safer for her if they remained friends.
"Anyway, there's a festival this Friday that I am not going alone to" he said, at least he could still ask her out as a friend... "Ann... go with me?" He put on a whiney voice and a cute face, which always got results.
"Fine, if you quit your belly aching!" She replied curtly, but with a secretly happy smile on her face.
Lumina could feel the warmth all around her that had been a constant for... however long she'd been in wherever the hell she was. Time was non-existent wherever it was and she had been drifting in some strange, dreamlike world. She felt warm, safe and loved, but yet something wasn't right, she felt trapped.
"Where am I?" She asked, her voice echoing across the plain of wherever she was. For as far as she could see were sunset coloured clouds, soft and fluffy yet like the rolling hills of a desert. The sky was pale pink and there was no sun or moon or anything really, just expanse. "Is this heaven?"
"Not exactly," she heard a familiar voice and whirled around, unable to see where it came from. Out of nowhere appeared a woman that she recognised but hadn't seen in person for so long, her mother.
"Am I dead?" She asked, not sounding worried about it, it was hard to feel anything wherever she was.
"Not exactly... you're sleeping, but you're in such a deep sleep you can't wake up. You're trapped." Her mother told her in her gentle, soothing voice.
"What's trapping me?" She asked in confusion and her mother frowned.
"You are my dear, you're holding onto your imagination. But it's more than that, this is a mixture of imagination and reality, this is limbo." Her mother explained and it was Lumina's turn to frown.
"So is any of this real? Are you real?" She asked, looking around at her unrealistic surroundings.
"It seems unreal, but it's a mixture, it's a mixture of life and death, real and unreal, freedom and restriction, imagination and limbo." Her mother explained, of course Lumina couldn't be sure, but it didn't matter whether she believed or not, what mattered was getting away.
"But I want to leave, so how can I be trapping myself?" She pointed out, making her point by pinching herself in order to wake up.
"Because a part of you wants to stay, to find out about your loved ones that have passed over and to be safe. Your mind has sealed you away from the pain of living, the trauma won't let you escape, not yet." The golden eyes of her mother surveyed her kindly. "Not until you see the good in this world that you are forgetting."
"I know the good, the good is Rock!" She shouted back stubbornly.
"Yes, he is the tie that holds you to this world, but it is not enough to break through, you need more."
Lumina sighed, gazing around the empty expanse of the place, everything was the colour of a sunset and everything was warm and bright. "So how am I supposed to see the good then?"
"I am going to show you."
"Oh, that's helpful then... could we get on with it?" She asked, not meaning to be rude to her mother, but finding the situation a little too hopeless.
"Yes of course, let me show you everything good in your life..." her mother said, offering her smooth, glowing hand to Lumina which she accepted immediately.
Rock watched her a little while longer, unable to take his eyes off her still form, wishing it would be animated once again.
"Do you wonder what it's like?" A man asked, walking into the room. He was dressed in blue scrubs and so Rock assumed he was a doctor or nurse of some kind, reading the name tag he realised he had assumed correctly: Adam Phillips.
"Living in a permanent imagination, where everything is nothing more than fiction?" Adam clarified and Rock nodded. "I'm Dr. Phillip's son by the way." He held out a hand which Rock shook slowly, his eyes darting back to Lumina almost immediately.
"I wonder all the time, can she even hear me?" Rock asked, looking doubtfully at the little fallen angel.
"Sometimes, chances are she's barely aware of what's going on around her, she can probably hear but not discern what is being said. But anything has a chance of helping her wake up, so keep talking to her." Adam suggested kindly, before running a hand through a thick mop of dark hair.
"I couldn't stop, it's the only thing that gets me through." He admitted, his dark eyes shining lovingly onto Lumina's pale face. He held back a sob, wishing he could be strong for his family's sake, but they all knew how difficult he found it.
"I... I wish I could tell you that she will wake up, but we don't know, she should wake up. It's like she's in the deep sleep to escape reality, and you should talk, to bring her back." Adam said, he was really only a helper in the hospital, mainly speaking to the patients, so his views were more philosophical than medical.
"Thanks," Rock said numbly, not even looking at him any more, too absorbed with watching his statue of a girlfriend.
"So what are you planning to show me...; my memories, my future, what's happening around me?" Lumina asked with curiosity, she was interested to know how her mother was planning to take her back. As much as she wanted to go home, she still wanted to spend some time with her mother, whether she was real or just imagination, and the time they spent would be precious.
"A mixture, yet none specifically; I am going to show you the people in your life and in what way they need you, and how much they love you." She said, smiling softly. "So first I'll take you around the valley."
Suddenly the cloudy scene zoomed past them and they were standing in the valley, but it was not the valley as Lumina had left it. A few of the houses were not there, and every house that was there looked brand new, even the mansion looked clean and fresh.
"Where is this?" She asked, looking around at the valley in its earlier form. The cobbles of the only street were less worn and protruded more, they were still a dull grey but they were rougher and had not been buffered by the passing of feet over time.
"I'm surprised you don't remember, this is Forget-Me-Not valley twelve years ago, you would have been six and had lived here for a few years then." Her mother, led her gently by the hand up to the mansion, where scales could be heard played on a grand piano. Lumina's heart lurched when she saw Romana, old even then, but less so; it was good to see her when she was alive. "This is merely a memory of her, but later I will let you meet her again."
Lumina surveyed the room, a great many of the artefacts accumulated over the years had not been bought yet, and so it looked rather barer than it did in her own time. Lumina then cast her gaze over her younger self, a small white dress clung to her petite frame and the innocence of youth surrounded her like a veil. Her chubby cheeks dimpled as she smiled, tiny fingers skittering across the keys of the piano, often making mistakes, but she would merely laugh them off.
"So who am I supposed to be seeing?" Lumina asked her mother who smiled.
"Patience my dear," she replied. Soon she saw the person who needed her, Sebastian shuffled out with a tray in his handed, handing her younger self a plate with a slice of cake. Romana frowned at him and he smiled back, handing her a cup of tea.
"You'll ruin her appetite," Romana pointed out, folding her arms over her chest and trying to remain firm as Sebastian smiled sheepishly.
"Oh it won't harm her, you'll eat dinner anyway, won't you Lumina?"
Young Lumina nodded hastily, backing up the man she saw as a father figure. "Thank you Sebastian!"
Romana sighed and gave a nod that it was okay that Lumina ate the cake. "I know you care for her as if she were your own."
"Of course, she's my little light, I don't know what I'd do without my angel!"
Young Lumina beamed at him, biting into her cake and letting Sebastian wrap his arms around her.
Lumina looked upon her memory with bittersweet feelings on her face, she could not believe that she had actually suspected Sebastian. She should have apologised, but she was too comatose to do it and she knew she couldn't let herself die without apologising to him first.
"Right, what's next?"
