BPOV

Pop showed up at the house after The Trash Men's band practice, smiling shyly, wearing dress pants and a button down oxford and a big, straight, gleaming white smile.

"Hey, Perky," he mumbled, glancing not so subtly over my shoulder.

"Rose's in the shower," I offered.

With mention of Rose and the shower, Pop froze for just a split second, but his recovery was admirable. Most people wouldn't have noticed, but I'm observant when it comes to guys. Little tricks of the trade, you know.

"Oh, well, um…" Pop stammered.

"You want to come in?" I asked, stepping to the side to allow Pop to pass.

That's when he actually looked at me, and that's when he froze again. I was flattered, considering that my black cami and Adorable's freshly laundered boxer briefs covered all the important bits. Suddenly, Pop didn't look so sure about coming inside.

It was Rose's footsteps on the stairs that finally moved the mountain, I mean, moved Pop. Rose shimmied into the living room wearing a sparkly tank top and hot pants, and apparently a man magnet, because Pop was drawn through the doorway and right to her side.

Rose needlessly smoothed out her tank and smiled. Pop dug his hands deep in his pockets, and sputtered a bashful hello.

Don't get me wrong, that was cool and all, but I didn't invite Pop over so he could get laid, which if I didn't do something, would probably happen in about thirty-seven seconds, depending on whether or not he froze again.

"So, Pop, did you bring us any news on the man?" I asked, jumping between the two of them.

"The man?" Pop asked, startled. "What man?"

I couldn't help rolling my eyes. "Your lead singer. Edward? The reason I said you should stop by."

"Oh, right, Edward."

"Who's Edward?" Rose asked as she tried to nudge me out of the way.

"He's Adorable," I answered without a hint of irony as I pulled Pop away from her and steered him to the couch. "So, what's up with The Trash Men, Pop?" I asked, plopping down next to him.

Rose squeezed herself between Pop and me. The lamplight glanced off of her tank top and shimmered on Pop's face. He blinked shielded his eyes and ducked a little. Really, he needed a pair of shades if he was going to hang out with Rose on a regular basis.

"Well, Perky, there's definitely something going on. Jasper slipped Ed a gun when I wasn't looking."

"A gun? You're sure?"

"I wasn't at first. It was in his front pocket, and, you know, it could have been…"

"Mr. Ed?" I guessed with a knowing smirk.

"The DVD that came in the mail today?" Rose asked, confused.

"Yeah," Emmett agreed with a chuckle. "Mr. Ed. I forgot about that shit. Anyway, it wasn't Mr. Ed. Jasper flipped out and made Ed carry it in his waistband, and that's when I saw it."

"A gun," I sighed. "Anything else?"

"Just some stuff about wolves and Volturi Waste Management (they're our competition), and uh… how Ed's dad's going to finally let the guy off the hook and stop following him around. How Felix won't be at our next show."

"What?" I tried to jump to my feet in shock, but I was wedged between a sparkly hooker and the arm of the couch.

"Just some stuff about wolves and Vol-" Emmett began to repeat.

"No, no, no!" I interrupted. "What does that stuff mean about Adorable's dad? I mean, is he letting Adorable off the hook for his debt? Is he out of… the family? Or is he actually feeding him to the wolves, or the Volturi, or what?"

"He owes his dad money?" Pop asked. "I don't know, Perky. I don't know about any of that. I could ask, I guess."

Actually, I should probably be the one to ask Adorable anything. If I asked I wouldn't get Pop into any more trouble than he was already in. But if I spoke to Adorable, I'd be jumping in head first with my eyes wide open, and getting more involved with the mob went against my sense of self-preservation. Before Adorable, all I'd wanted was to be a happy hooker until I had my house and some savings. Then I could work towards something good and wholesome. Well, if not wholesome, at least something legal.

"You have Mr. Ed DVD's?" Pop asked Rose, after I dropped out of the conversation.

Rose scooted closer to Pop. I hadn't thought it was possible. "Bell does. They came in the mail today. Why?"

"Well, I've never seen a talking horse."

"Me and Perky were just getting set to watch. You want to join us?" Rose asked.

Pop looked to me for permission.

"Why the hell not," I acquiesced. At least it would give me some time to think things through. Maybe I'd bite the bullet and call the man. I'd call him Adorable, because he really was adorable, and because when it came right down to it, I didn't want him to die.

xXxXx

Which brings us to this moment, sitting on my bed with Pop and Rose and a big bowl of popcorn, watching the first season of Mr. Ed.

The kids are behaving, if you can believe it. They hold hands and their knees are touching. It reminds me of that first date I had with Adorable and my chest aches, and I know I should call. I mean, he sent me Mr. Ed in the mail. How awesome is that?

Over the last ten years, lots of men have told me that they loved me, but Adorable's the first guy in a long, long time that really seems to mean it. And he could be in danger. Actually, I know he's in danger; it's just a matter of degree. Judging from the fact that his dad seems to be a mob boss, I'm guessing he's in deep.

I'm on the verge of excusing myself to place the call, when there's a huge thwack and clank on the roof just over our heads.

Rose jumps into Pop's arms, and in his suddenly frozen state, he holds her tight.

There's another clank, and then a thud from somewhere below my bedroom window. I pause the Mr. Ed episode and we all hold our breath. There's another thud, and if I strain, I can hear music… I think.

I get up to go to the window, and Rose throws herself across the bed to try to stop me. "Bell, no!"

"Jesus, Rose, get a grip!" I shake her off, hop off the bed and open the blinds.

Nothing.

There's another thud, but I can't see directly below the window, so I open it and I'm overwhelmed by music and lyrics I've only heard once before:

And baby we'll go

As far as we can

I'll be your garbage man

And I'll take out your junk

And I'll crush it down…

"Adorable?" I call.

There's another clank and thump below.

"Perky?"

Oh my god; it's him! I lift the screen. That's when I notice the taut rope next to the window. It shimmies and strains. I follow it downward until I see him: Adorable. He's suspended halfway between the ground and my bedroom window, making his way methodically upward, one hitch at a time.

I can't stop smiling. He's scaling a wall because I don't have a fire escape.

In my garbage truck

I'll never throw you away

When you're old and grey

Just roll it away

The music's coming from an old, white limo parked in my driveway.

"Your bedroom had to be on the second floor, huh?" he asks as he struggles slowly upward, a daisy and a periwinkle clenched in his teeth.

White and purple.

Sigh.

"Where else would my bedroom be?" I ask shaking my head in heart-warmed disbelief.

Adorable stops his ascent and gives me an incredulous look. "Dude, I know bedrooms are on the second floor. I'm doing Pretty Woman, Perky, so bear with me."

I can't help smiling. I'd never admit it out loud, but I know the end of Pretty Woman by heart. I hate that movie and everything it stands for, but there's a little girl buried deep inside that loves it to death, all at the same time. As much as I know that a hooker can't depend on anyone else to save her, every one of us secretly hopes, deep down, that some guy will care enough to try. And maybe I'm dense, but it takes Adorable rock climbing up the side of my house, re-enacting Pretty Woman, to see that he's the one.

My smile seems to spur Adorable on. He closes the space between us like he's been climbing walls his entire life. Finally in front of me, deliciously close, he rubs his thumb across my cheek, and then he wipes the sweat from his forehead.

"So what happens after he scales the house that's going to be repossessed by the bank?" Adorable asks as he tries to catch his breath.

"She scales him right back," I reply, wrapping my arms around his neck.

And his kiss… goddamn. My knees go weak. I'd forgotten how much force Adorable puts into kissing, and I grab hold of him so that I'm not knocked back into the bedroom. I love it. I do. He's so earnest, and so strong, and full of so much raw, unrestrained power. I want to feel that raw power - in bed. Immediately.

I start to unhitch his harnesses, and Adorable struggles to pull himself through the window without getting tangled. We're forced to break the kiss while I help haul him over the ledge. That's when he gets a good look at me. That's when I get a good look at Mr. Ed. That's when the ropes and harnesses and carabiners crisscrossed over Adorable's body make me grab hold of the curtains for support.

His enormous hands run over my hips and around to my ass. He snaps the waistband of his boxer briefs. "My god, Perky. Are these mine?"

Adorable nuzzles my ear as he waits for an answer. It's a long time coming. I have to catch my breath. The harnesses make Adorable look like he's all muscle and cock… and clasps and ropes and…

"Dude, Edward! What the heck are you doing here?"

Emmett.

"Is this your trash man, Bell?"

And Rose.

Adorable looks up from his boxer briefs to Emmett in his formal wear, to Rose in her sparkly tank top and hot pants, to Mr. Ed on the big screen.

"Wilburrr!" Mr. Ed whinnies.

"What the fuck, Perky?" Adorable asks, looking hurt and confused and like he's contemplating jumping back over the ledge.

"It's not what it looks like." I grab onto Adorable's shirt like I might be able to hold him in place.

"Well it looks like Emmett's having a Mr. Ed sleepover with you and another half-dressed friend."

"No, I, uh… I saw Emmett this morning," I start to explain. "And I, uh -"

"She's worried about you, dude," Emmett jumps in. "Really worried. And I am too, man."

"You're worried?" Adorable asks, his dusky green eyes searching mine.

"So worried," I murmur. It comes out in a whisper. I don't know who I am or where I'll be living anymore, but I know I'm worried about Adorable. And I know that I want him in my bed and in a harness so bad that it hurts.

"I didn't know if you even cared," Adorable murmurs back, pushing my hair behind my ear. I shiver - head to toe.

"I do care, Adorable. I do. A lot."

"I'm so sorry," he pleads.

"I don't want you to die."

"I don't want to die either, Perky. Not as long as I have you."

"Hey, Emmett," Rose coos from somewhere across the room. "There's something I want to show you in the guest room. Come on."

I guess they leave; I don't really care. All I care about are the large hands that lift the cami over my head. All I care about are the lips that shower slow, soft kisses over my neck. All I care about is Adorable, who's too trussed up in hooks and lines do anything besides unzip a fly and pick me up in his hands and pin me to the nearest wall.

That's where I wrap my legs around him. That's where I call out his nickname. That's where I tell him I love him - no if's and's or but's. That's where he tells me he loves me too. And he uses my real name. And I don't mind.


A/N: Next update... tomorrow morning. xxx, M