Chapter 8: Royal Discovery


Monstro Town

"He was a big nasty thing," Mario said as he chewed on the roast beef sandwich Morton had brought him while he told the young Koopa about the adventures he had so far. "He has four eyes, four strange ears and a huge red tongue. The first time Mallow, Maria and I fought him he turned me into a scarecrow." He and the others were having a late lunch at Monstro Town. After leaving Seaside they journeyed back to Kero Pond where Frogfucious said he believed another piece was beyond Land's End, that people in the kingdom of clouds would know. They had to go through an underground temple first, where they ran into Belome again and after they defeated the monster they found themselves in Monstro Town.

Monstro Town was the home of former members of the Troop who have became as disenchanted as Mario had, or felt they were no longer worthy to serve Bowser. They had made homes in various caves in the cliff side and also built new homes in front of the caves and the denizens had set up shops in both the caves and homes. Mario felt relieved to meet up with more of Bowser's children and his mother. He also met up with some of his former troops.

"Wow," Morton blinked. "What did that feel like?"

"I felt incredibly light and itchy," Mario took a sip of his drink. "We fought that creep again. This time he made clones of us after tasting us." He shuddered at the thought of that tongue rubbing against him. "He said I tasted sour and your father tasted terrible."

"What about the others?" Morton asked. "That little fluffball looks like he would taste like candy." He licked his lips.

"No," Mario's mother pointed at him. "You will not eat Mario's friends."

"I'm just saying he looks tasty."

"Belome thought he was," Mario ate another bite from his sandwich. "He said Geno tasted bitter, but not bad, the princess tasted peachy and Maria tasted salty."

"Bowser," Maria shouted from where she was teaching some young Goombas how to play golf. He entire face was as red as Mario's.

"That is king Bowser," the Koopa king smiled down on her. "You are a member of my troop."

"I will call you king Bowser," Maria was still pissed. "I will call you, your majesty, sire and your highness, but if I ever catch you leering at my backside again I will wrap this club around your head."

"I love it when you are feisty," Bowser chuckled as he walked away from her.

"Why do I want to smack him?" Mario asked.

"Save your energy for Kamek," Mom placed a hand on his shoulder. "I have beat the snot out of him for the murders years ago and for what he had done to you recently, but you still haven't had your turn."

"Trust me," Mario growled. "When I'm done he's going to need a new spine."

"What spine?" Morton asked.

"Good one kid," Mario gave him a pat on top of his head.

"Where are going from here?" Mother asked.

"Up," Mario pointed to the clouds. "After we fought with Yaridovitch we were advised to find the kingdom in the clouds."

"You are going to need help to get there," Mom said. "I hope Monstro Mama will be able to help."

"Here she comes," Morton pointed towards the kind toad woman who was on her way over. "I hope she brought some cookies."

"Travel arrangements have been made," Monstro Mama told them. She was a kind and elderly toad woman who served as the town's matriarch. Mario liked her. She was one of the few toads in the land who was nice to Koopas. "Sergeant Flutter?" She put two fingers to her mouth and blew.

A paratroopa with a dark gray shell flew towards them and was followed by several other winged troopas. "Sorry if we are late."

"Hey sergeant," Mario nodded at him. He remembered the day Flutter left Dark Land. It was a week after their failure at taking over the Mushroom Kingdom. Flutter blamed himself and felt it was the right thing to do.

"General Mario," Flutter saluted him. "What brings you here?"

"They need to get up to the bean stalks," Mama explained. "Could you and your troops provide some assistance for the general and his friends?"

"Anything you ask ma'am," Flutter nodded before he turned to his troops. "You heard her. Move on out."

Mario watched as the paratroopas arranged themselves as jumping steps before he turned to Morton. "I need you to get the others."


The troopa steps had lead them to the top of the mountain where there were several vines and pipes and even though he was curious about them, Mario had to forget about jumping inside the pipes he had to move on and they headed straight a large floating block that was guarded by a giant piranha plant with multiple traps.

"We're in trouble," Peach was ready to strike at it with her parasol.

"I doubt Mario or Bowser might be able to talk sense into this plant," Maria said, just as the plant's largest trap snapped at them.

"You got that right," Bowser said. "That is no ordinary plant. That is a smilax, or in this case a megasmilax. There is a reason we don't use them. They are uncontrollable and unpredictable. They only one they don't try to eat are the one who planted their seed and waters them, anyone else." He slid his finger across his neck.

"But it's still a plant," Maria said. "That means it is weak against fire." Her shirt and the trim on her sleeves turned white. "Hey smiley, eat this." She threw several fireballs at the plant.

Mario and Bowser breathed fire towards it and their combined effort had burned off two of the other traps.

"Let me try something," Mallow waved his hands around. A large pile of snow fell onto the plant and formed the shape of a snowman. The snow melted away, leaving behind a shriveled and brown plant.

"Good job, Mallow." Peach said after the last of the snow had melted away and gave Mallow a hug.

"When did you learn how to do that?" Mario asked.

"Just now," Mallow smiled.

"Oh no," a Shyguy with wings fluttered down. "Oh man, the plant got whacked. Valentina's gonna bust my balls for this." He flew around the pot holding the dead plant. "Oh no, oh no. What am I gonna do?" He grabbed his head and danced a small jig. "I'm in deep yogurt now. Wait I just won't tell her." He flew back up through the clouds.

Maria jumped and punched the block from underneath. A large vine sprouted from it and grew until it poked through the clouds. "Going up?"

"Good work," Mario said. He noticed something resembling a bean in the pot where the Megasmilax was. It was a seed, but from what he remembered the seed did not seem like it was the type that would grow into a Smilax. Maybe he could give it to Mrs. Buttons in Rose Town and she could sell it for money.

The vine lead them to an area where they could walk on clouds and there were odd spiral shaped vines in various colors that floated over the clouds. The clouds were soft and slightly damp. They vines looked more like something children would enjoy climbing at various parks were held in the air as if by magic. Geno found a vine he was certain would lead to some place significant.

He was right. They emerged in a pastel colored city on the clouds. The houses and shops looked like giant cupcakes, even the turrets of the large castle appeared edible. There were even odd trees that grew on the clouds. The most interesting part was that the citizens all resembled Mallow.

"Maybe we can speak with the king," Peach pointed to the castle.

"You won't be able to speak with him," one of the white puffy citizens said. "Both the king and queen have been sick for a while."

"Oh," Peach covered her mouth and blushed. "I'm so sorry."

"You don't have to apologize ma'am," the cloud woman said. "Seeing as you are a stranger there was no way for you to know." She scratched the top of her head. "You know you have been the first visitors we have gotten in years."

"Maybe if you didn't have a giant plant blocking the direct path," Bowser suggested.

"What giant plant?" The cloud woman asked.

"Never mind," Mario tapped his former king on the shoulder. "I have a feeling none of these folks knew about that plant or that guy sent to be the care taker." There wasn't suspicious in the air.

"Who is taking care of the royal couple?" Peach asked.

The woman's smile faded. "That would be Lady Valentina. She is the number one advisor of the king. She has been running things for a while. A few of her soldiers even call her Queen Valentina." Several chimes came from the direction of the castle. "Sounds like she is about to make an announcement."

"I want to see this Lady Valentina," Peach said.

"Me too," Mario nodded. He didn't trust this Valentina. That was the name the shy guy said after they had destroyed the Smilax.

"Make way for the troop," Bowser plowed his way through the fluffballs until he was in front of the crowd. Mario and the others followed and Peach and Mallow apologized to everyone as they edged on through. "Best seats in all the house."

"Greetings everyone," one of the bird like guards greeted the crowd. "Queen Valentina has an announcement to make."

"Thank you, and shut up," a slender woman with well endowed breasts in a tight white dress exited from the front entrance. She had a very flat shaped head with wide spread eyes, large nostrils and plump lips. Her face looked like a frog's face and she wore a parrot shaped hat on her head. Mario couldn't tell if she had hair or not. "I have to regret to inform you the king has taking a turn for the worst." She took a sip from her martini while the crowd gasped. "I had hoped that my discovery would make him feel better, but it hasn't, however this leads me to some good news to tell everyone. I have found the long lost Prince Mallow." More gasps from the crowd followed.

"Prince Mallow?" Maria repeated and turned to Mallow who just shrugged.

"That is neat how we share the same name." Mallow said.

"Yeah, neat." Mario nodded and frowned. Something just didn't sit right with him.

"Come on out dear," Valentina turned to the castle. "Don't be shy."

A large and fat black bird with a yellow beak and a helmet tipped in feathers hobbled into view. The bird spread his wings and bowed at the crowed.

"No," Valentina tapped on his helmet. "You don't bow to them. They bow to you." The bird turned to her and appeared to whisper something to her. "Oh my. I am flattered. Prince Mallow has just proposed to me." She had her hand over her mouth while she blushed. "Oh my. You all may carry on while I have a wedding to plan." She followed "Mallow" back into the castle.

"Wow," Maria blinked. "That was something."

"Yeah," Bowser nodded. "Looks like she is going to be the queen after all."

"We need to find out the location of the sixth star piece," Geno said while the crowd dispersed. "I suggest we split up and speak with the shop owners."


Mario and Mallow had entered a store with a sign that had painted with the words for Garro's Studio. There wasn't a large variety of artwork inside. It was mostly golden statues of Valentina.

"Sorry folks," a man said. Mario had assumed he was Garro. The cloud like man stepped in from the back room and wore a green visor and an apron. "I can't really do any custom orders, Valentina has kept me busy with just making statues of her."

"Mario look," Mallow was pointing at a golden statue that looked just like him. "This one looks like me."

"Yeah it does," Mario turned to Garro. "Why is there a statue of Mallow?"

"Mallow?" Garro laughed. "That is a statue of king Nimbus when he was a boy." He stopped laughing and stared at Mallow and the statue. "By the sky, you are a spitting image of Nimbus." He blinked again. "You said you're name is Mallow?"

"That is my name," Mallow nodded and stared at the statue.

"Uh Mallow," Mario couldn't believe it took him this long to figure it out. He should have realized it when he heard the prince's name. "You look like the king and you share the name with the prince. You were also adopted."

"So?" Mallow scratched his head until his eyes widened with realization. "Are you saying I'm the long lost prince?"

"Praise strata," Garro placed his hands over his chest. "You are Prince Mallow."

"I'm a prince?" Mallow blinked. "But if I'm the prince then who does Valentina have?"

"A fake," Mario scowled. The clues finally fit together. "She's trying to usurp the throne. Think about it, we are the first visitors to this land in years, there was a giant monster plant blocking the entrance, the Shyguy who took care of it said he was in trouble with Valentina. She introduces a large bird, pretending it's you and then said fake prince asks her to marry it. I wouldn't be surprised if she has your parents locked up somewhere." They could also be dead, but Mario didn't want to tell him that. "That could be why she blocked the vine to this land, and why she won't allow anyone in the castle."

"I was suspicious at first," Garro nodded. "I couldn't say anything without proof though."

"How are we going to free my parents?" Mallow asked. "Nobody is allowed in."

"I'm allowed in, but only when making a delivery," Garro scratched his chin. "One of you could pretend to be my assistant or apprentice, but the other one." He stared at the statues. "That's it."


The plan was for Mallow to wear a similar apron and hat to Garro and pretend to be his apprentice. Mario was to be a gift. He held his breath and kept his eyes closed while they covered him in gold. He hoped the crap would wash off easily. After painting him they put him on a cart along with a few other statues and took him to the castle.

Mario didn't hear what they said to the guards but the clouds had convinced them to take in Mario as well as the other statues. He wished he could see, but he couldn't risk being discovered and kept his eyes shut.

"Garro," the voice belonged to Valentina. Maria fought to keep from shriveling up his nose in disgust. She smelled like a human, but just a little bit worse, and she smelled like alcohol. "What is the meaning of this?"

"Just making some deliveries. This is Mal, my new apprentice."

"Nice to meet you, Lady Valentina," Mallow greeted in the most sugary voice Mario had ever heard.

"Charming, I want to know about this Koopa statue."

"Oh this?" Garro asked. "This is General Mario of the Koopa Troop, a part of legendary military figure series I decided to do on my free time. I wanted to give you the first one as a gift."

"A gift?" Valentina asked.

"Yes," Mallow said. "Master Garro slaved on this one. Look at the scowl on the Koopa's face and the way he holds his fists. Only a fool would want to mess with a figure like him. Check out the detailing on his horns and the spikes on his shell, not to mention the moustache. Do you know how hard it is to capture facial hair down?"

"Hmm. He isn't much to look at, but then again all reptiles are ugly."

'I can say the same about you, lady.' Mario thought.

"I do appreciate fine art." She clapped her hands. "Dodo, show the apprentice where to put my new statues."

Mario kept silent while he was wheeled to another room and lifted off the cart and put on a pedestal. He didn't move or say anything until Mallow nudged him.

"We are alone."

"Good," Mario opened his eyes and jumped down. "Now to find where this lady is."

"I just realized a small flaw," Mallow frowned. "How are we going to let the others know?"

"Good question," Mario went to the nearest window. "I can blow smoke rings and they can come to the window and we lower something." He looked out and down. There were several more guards on the ground. "Ok forget that."

"Maybe she will be scared when she sees that it's a real Koopa and not a statue."

"I like that," Mario smiled. "Lets go."

They wandered around trying to avoid the guards while they snuck around in search of Valentina, or where Mallow's parents might have been kept. They didn't have to bother sneaking past the green Shyguys. For some reason they were fascinated by the large fans, either those guys were stupid or they have an addiction and were smoking something they shouldn't be smoking.

"Someone said Valentina might be in this room," Maria was heard in a hall they were about to enter.

"Considering it was guarded I think she might be in there." Geno said to her. The four of them were dressed in white aprons, even Bowser.

"Hey," Mallow was the first to greet them. "How did you get in here?"

"The princess convinced the guards that we were the caterers for the upcoming wedding," Maria chuckled. She stopped when she saw Mario. "What happened to you?"

"Long story," Mario held up his hands. "We found some important information about the king and queen."

"I'm the real prince Mallow," Mallow said.

"We already guessed," Bowser turned to the doors. "We just fought a nasty birdo guarding these doors. Mario, ready to help me open it?"

"You bet," Mario ran backwards along with Bowser and struck the doors shell first. Once again they used too much force and rolled backwards along the floor.

"Here they are," the winged Shyguy pointed at them. "They defeated Shelly."

"Dodo," Valentina handed her glass to the Shyguy. "Get me out of here." She climbed onto the back of the large bird that pretended to be the prince and the two of them fled the room.

"Oh crap," the Shyguy trembled. "Uh, run away." He flew off and left a small bag of funny smelling stuff behind. Fertilizer was written across it.

"Come back here," Mallow ran after Valentina.

"Hey wait up," Mario ran after him, only stopping to pick up the bag of fertilizer

Valentina and Dodo were in front of the castle, being blocked off by several of the citizens. Garro must have spread the word because they were questioning their authority.

"Get away from us," Valentina shoved through the crowd.

"You are not getting away from us," Mario jumped in front of her.

"Yeah," Mallow stood beside him.

"Dodo," Valentina screeched and stomped the ground. "Help me"

Dodo jumped over Mario and snatched Geno in his claws before they bounced off somewhere.

"Blizzard," Valentina waved her hands around. Hail and snow rained down on Mario and the others. "Too cold for the lizards"

"Dumb bitch," Bowser said before he threw a spiked link at her. "We are warm blooded."

"Ouch," the weapon struck Valentina with enough force to cause her breasts to jiggle.

"Wow," Mario and Bowser gasped. When was the last time they saw breasts do that?

"Ugh," Peach slapped Mario upside the head before she struck Valentina with her fan.

"Men," Maria gasped and slapped Bowser before she hit the usurper with a hockey stick.

"How dare you," Valentina waved her hands and large chunks of ice fell on Mario's head. "You never hit a lady."

"You are not a lady," Mario struck her in the face with his fist.

She screeched and sent two snowflake buzz saws at Peach.

"Peach," Mario grabbed his princess.

Bowser roared at Valentina while Maria hurled fireballs. It was enough to push the usurper to the edge.

"Get out of my kingdom," Mallow walloped her.

"No," Valentina cried out as she tried to keep her balance. "Dodo." She fell over the edge.

Dodo bounced and hopped from where he carried off Geno and jumped after her while flapping his bedraggled wings.

"Peach," Mario continued to hold her. He could feel and smell the blood that was seeping through her wounds. "We need a doctor."

"It's not too deep." Peach smiled weakly. "I'll be fine. I'm more concerned about your head."

"My head will be okay." Mario said as several cloud people came running up to them with a stretcher. "She needs a doctor now."

The paramedics placed the princess on the stretcher and carried her off to a large building.

"Mallow, go check on your parents," Maria said. "We will catch up after we get Peach and Mario checked."

"I said I was fine," he felt a few beads of sweat trickle down. "I didn't get a concussion this time."

"No," Maria ran a finger across his sweaty forehead. "But you did get cut." It wasn't sweat. It was blood and there was enough to coat the tip of Maria's finger.

"Okay," Mario swallowed. "I'll go see the doctor."