Chapter Twenty-Eight – The Week.

Part Six.

'I'll be there for you through it all, even if saving you sends me to Heaven.'

-Red Jumpsuit Apparatus – Your Guardian Angel


Friday.

Bella. P.O.V

Finally, I had escaped that annoying thing that called himself Edward.

And I do say escaped because I literally had to command him to walk into the closet and stay there while I left my own house.

It was pathetic that I actually had to escape my own house because of him – because he'd, and I quote 'follow me to the ends of the earth.'

I couldn't stand him.

Every time he smiled that repulsive crooked smile of his I wanted too fling him headfirst into a fire.

It really took every ounce of self-control I had not to kill him. I wanted to kill him. Oh, how tempting it was.

I'd thought about doing it often. Really it was hard not too – though it was times like these I wish he could read my mind. I'd gotten creative.

The scenarios were rather entertaining.

That was how I found myself strolling aimlessly though the lush green that was Forks. No real destination in mind. My feet carrying me.

Maybe the next time those Newborns came to attack, I'd let one slip though my defenses. And they'd dispose of my annoyance for me.

Though, I doubted it would work and it wouldn't be much fun for me either – killing him myself, however, would be.

Aro would see through it though, if it ended up working. He knew me so well. I growled.

I needed to hurry up and end this mission. Edward was driving me insane.

Though, when I ruled Volturi and came out of the shadows, Edward would go. Mission or no, he would go.

It was something to look forward too.

I stopped abruptly, nostrils flaring at the familiar scent of blood. Blood I knew – my blood.

I looked up sharply – surprised – and the dilapidated mess that was my childhood home towered over me, dead and decaying.

But it wasn't my house anymore. Just a mere shadow of my old life.

And I hated this place. I cursed my feet for leading me here, for betraying me.

However, on a small plus side at least Edward wouldn't follow me here; he was too selfishly self-centered to confront the mess he himself had made.

It was funny though – laughable even – that the place I'd died was suddenly a sanctuary from Edward. Oh irony.

With a small sigh, I stepped up the first rotting stair to the door, feeling suddenly washing over me.

This house could do that to me – break me down. Everything that had happened here, I remembered with perfect clarity.

Every detail. I'd never be able to forget.

I stopped at the door, eyes clenching shut tightly – trying to expel the emotions that came with this house. My house.

It'd been left to me in Charlie's will.

I let out a breath and opened my eyes. The door handle was rusted.

A house shouldn't be able to cripple me with vulnerability. But it did. And I hated it.

I pushed the door open with a creek, which was deafening in the still of Forks. I stepped into the house.

The scent of blood hit me like a wave and it was disgusting.

But, not everything was, I could smell something else, the scent of…

My head snapped up.

"Bella."

"Alice."

We spoke at the same time – surprised voices overlapping.

I felt an overwhelming wave of emotion at seeing Alice standing there – eyes shining, watching me carefully.

I didn't know what it was, I couldn't place the emotion, didn't want too.

I just knew it was pleasant – nice- I felt myself relax.

Alice averted her eyes. "Sorry."

She was always apologizing to me. "You're allowed to be here, this isn't my house anymore." I said indifferently.

Golden eyes searched mine imploringly. "Am I?" She asked, I just shrugged, watching her carefully.

Ease. I blinked.

Having her here put me at ease.

I frowned, confused. How was she making me feel safer inside a house that I hated so much?

But, I didn't care how she was doing it, because suddenly, I didn't want her to leave.

I blamed the house.

"How did you slip out?" I asked, curious as to how she'd managed to sneak out without me knowing.

Despite the situation she gave me a lazy half smile, tapping her head. "I have my ways."

I just nodded. It must have been while Edward was annoying me, while I was distracted. Regardless, I was impressed.

She showed potential.

Alice wrung her hands together, fidgeting nervously.

I took a look around – everything was just as I'd left it. Just as it was the day I had died.

"Midnight brought me here; the first time we met." Alice conversed – I nodded, Midnight had informed me of that. "This place Bella…" Her eyes closed.

She seemed to be internally debating something and I watched. She looked conflicted.

"You can ask me, Alice." I encouraged, voice softer then I'd intended it to be.

Her eyes opened and she snorted, bitterly. "What did we do to you, Bella?"

I met her gaze steadily; this is what Midnight had meant about asking the right questions. I didn't hesitate, when I answered her though, I didn't need too.

"You killed me."

Alice's eyes closed in pain, as if she couldn't look at me. Her jaw clenched tightly – she took a deep breath. "What happened here?" She managed to choke out.

And I didn't want to tell her. Why? Usually I'd love the chance to hurt the Cullen's. So why didn't I want to tell her?

How in hell did this one Vampire manage to confuse me so much?

"Why?" I asked, curious as to why she wanted to know.

Pain and regret filled her eyes with an intensity that I had to look away from. It was painful too see her like that.

"Because I'm not stupid, I know this happened because we left you. I'm not just going to ignore it."

My eyes flicked back to hers, emotions welling in my chest at her words. She wanted to take responsibility.

She was taking responsibility.

Damn this house, for making me feel things….

"It's my fault. I have no right to know what happened here and I'm not expecting an answer. I'm hoping for one."

Those golden eyes shimmered in pain. She was blaming herself and wanted to take responsibility. She wanted to understand.

And I just wanted her to stop looking at me with those sorrow filled eyes.

"Sometimes the greater burden is not knowing." I said; willing the string of forced emotions I seemed to be feeling down.

Because, I shouldn't care that she was here, in pain and regretful, I shouldn't care about her.

Everything that had happened to me happened because of a family she was apart of. Still apart of.

But I did care, because there she was, standing there looking at me with those sad eyes – filled with pain – and making me feel things I shouldn't.

Making me feel at ease, making me feel safe.

Alice flinched at my words.

"You're right. But I want to know you, I want to understand, I want to help."

My anger flared at the implication behind her words.

"I don't need fixing." I snapped, eyes flashing dangerously. Alice didn't look scared - didn't flinch - just continued to watch me with those sad eyes.

"I never said that you did." Her voice was apologetic.

I shook my head, sighing. "You're an idiot." Alice twitched a smile.

"Maybe so." She shrugged. "Doesn't change my position on the matter, though."

Why did she care so much?

"Why do you insist on befriending me?" I demanded. Needing to understand her – why she cared, why she wanted to know me.

"I'm not losing you again." She snapped back defiantly – looking more confident as soon as the words left her mouth.

My chest clenched in pain – pain for what, I wasn't sure, I wasn't sure if it was even pain I was feeling. I ignored it.

"You lose already lost me." Alice flinched again at my words. Like I'd slapped her physically.

Regret coursed through me – painful regret at seeing her so defeated – so hurt. Because of me.

"Then I can only try." Alice, always the optimist – I suppose that would never change.

I shook my head though, wondering why she'd want to even try, I wasn't Bella Swan anymore.

Though, looking at those expressive honey gold eyes I felt my resolve slipping. I clenched my jaw, angry – angry that I was so weak around her.

Those eyes – painfully understanding – seemed to look right through me. Saw the 'me' I had become and understood.

Cared.

Walls that no one but my Daughter could demolish; were cracking – chipping away with her every word, with her every look.

They had been chipping away the moment Alice had reintroduced herself to me, that first day at school.

And before I could stop myself – lost in those honey colored eyes – the words fell from my mouth, regardless of me not wanting them too.

"Victoria."

Alice's eyes widened at the name and I could see the thoughts behind her eyes – realization setting in.

I watched in fascination as emotions flickered across those eyes of hers – quickly – always shifting before I could recognize them.

Alice's eyes made me believe that Vampires really did have a chance at making it to Heaven if they were killed – or whatever was up there.

"What…" Alice choked, voice stumbling. "What did she do to you?"

I smirked – I couldn't help it – my face twisting at the memories.

"What didn't she do to me?"

Alice looked away, biting her lip, hard. "Tell me?" She whispered, stepping forward, to brush a stray lock of hair behind my hair.

My eyes widened at the bold gesture, breath hitching at the familiar burning sensation that coursed through me at the touch.

Her fingers brushed my face – I twitched away, the sensation unnerving – though not unwelcome. And that was what made it all the more unnerving.

That I didn't mind her touching me.

Alice's face twisted in pain – her hand dropping to her side. She stepped back. "I'm sorry, I should go."

Emotion welled through me – overtaking me as she stepped back – my hand reached out for hers, suddenly, and my fingers wrapped around her slim wrist, stopping her.

"Don't." I commanded softly – fingers tingling, where they touched her soft skin.

I didn't like seeing her in pain. I didn't like it when those golden eyes dulled in sadness – looking broken. I didn't want her to leave me.

"Bella?" She asked, looking down at my hand, soft look on her face.

"Don't leave." I breathed, in a moment of honesty, a moment of weakness.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

"I'm not going anywhere, Bella." Alice intertwined our hands, giving a small squeeze.

I felt the tension leave my body with her touch. And I couldn't look away from those annoyingly beautiful eyes, to pull away from her hand.

"And I'm sorry…" Alice smiled, softly. "For putting you through all of this. For doing this to you."

"Don't flatter yourself, Alice. It was all of you." My tone was soft, taking the edge off my words. Like I was trying to take some of the blame off Alice.

She shook her head and laughed bitterly. I didn't like the sound – it wasn't her. "I could have come back."

She ran her thumb over the back of my hand, lightly. The touch was relaxing, soothing and my eyes fluttered closed without my content.

"I should have come back."

Her voice was plagued with an intense guilt and remorse. She blamed herself, for everything that had happened to me, she blamed only herself.

And I understood – she wanted to take responsibility for what she believed for what she believed was solely her fault.

Her thumb continued to caress the back of my hand – I didn't stop her.

"I should have come back to you." She whispered.

I didn't open my eyes. "Why do you care so much?" I breathed back, absurdly thinking that raising my voice would break the mood.

"Why do you think I care?" Alice chuckled softly, kindly. That wasn't an answer.

My eyes opened. "I'm not the same Bella you remember, Alice." She already knew that, I know, but it was the only reason I could see. Alice gave me a small sad smile.

"And I'm not the same Alice." She breathed, stepping closer – her other hand reaching out, slowly – I didn't pull back this time and she cupped his cheek.

I sighed, relaxing into the touch, my body wasn't listening to me anymore.

How is it that she could do this to me?

Her eyes never left mine. "Let me in, Bella." I took a shaky breath – cheek tingling pleasantly.

What was she doing to me?

"You'll just blame yourself." I managed to utter.

"I already do." She admitted, smiling.

What was I feeling?

I closed my eyes once more, not understanding. The urge to tell her was so strong, too strong and I didn't feel like fighting it. Fighting her.

I unconsciously leant into her touch, so soft…

"Follow me." I said, finally, opening my eyes. There was a question on her beautiful face.

I tugged at our joined hands, the hand on my cheek lingered for a second longer before it dropped. The loss of contact made me feel cold.

Keeping our hands intertwined, I lead her outside, opening the back door to the overgrown backyard I used to share with Alice.

Alice stepped out into the dull light with me.

The other hand flew to her mouth as she gasped. Looking grief stricken, almost ill, her hand tightened around mine.

Because there, in the middle of the overgrown yard lay two gray tombstones.

Plain, except for the names and inscriptions written in elegant cursive.

Isabella 'Bella' Swan.
1986 – 2008
Beloved Daughter, Friend – taken too soon.
You will be eternally missed.
I'm sorry.

Charlie Swan.
1963 – 2008.
Beloved Father, Friend, Husband, Protector.
You will be missed.

"Bella…" Alice choked – she was shaking.

I knew the headstones by heart; I'd seen them so many times, over and over.

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath, preparing myself – Alice waited, eyes vacantly watching the stone, as if they held all the answers.

Alice's fingers fit perfectly between mine, it was comforting, I needed that – I needed her. I didn't understand…But another part of me did.

That distracting, minuscule part of me, understood.

I opened my eyes; the light of day was fading into night, spilling colors onto the horizon while the black tried to overcome them, slowly, silently.

"It was three years after you'd all left Forks…"