Shikamaru's So-Called Life
He could fly, fly, fly away on the next smoke ring rising out of his lungs, and no one would give a real damn, because everyone wanted to fly anyway.
Right?
Well, maybe his mother would give two shits. She'd bitch and groan and curl her lip in that vicious sort of way that made Yoshino look like the evil stepmother in all those comedy-dramas Ino made Shikamaru watch with her, just so she had a reason to cry once in a while.
Not that he'd ever tell her he was on to her.
Where are you going in life, Shikamaru? You graduate next year, and then what? You can't sleep your day away and smoke like a delinquent (and hell if I ever find this in my house again, I swear I'll send you to your grandfather's farm to go work the dope out of you!). And if you don't show up for work in the real world, someone's going to notice. What does that say if you can't even bother to show up for an easy job like what you had at the boys and girls' club? The boys and girls club, for Christ's sake! You only went a couple days out of the week! God, I just-I just want you to take your life seriously!
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he forgot to show up for a couple of Wednesdays. Or maybe four. No, it was five. Quite frankly, he was amazed when he showed up on that sixth Wednesday that no one did anything but flash plastic off-white smiles, watching as he signed himself in.
So he wasn't really a kid person. They were troublesome, irritating, sticky (with God-knows-what), and a bottomless pit of whys. So when the daycare manager let him go the next week, he wasn't too surprised, but he was surprised it had taken them so damn long to notice he skipped every Wednesday to go chill with the boys and sometimes smoke.
So what? Hell, he was only seventeen. He'd graduate soon, sure. He'd go to college where the nights were long and bright as long as he had his way, and he'd pick something to do eventually. He didn't have to study much anyway to pass. He always passed. Then one day, when he was successful and bored with his predictable but well paying job, he'd pull out a joint in front of his mother and say, guess everything has a loophole.
It's what he thought of every time she gave him that talk. The talk that made his eyes roll to the back of his skull and made him call Ino and complain, just so someone would say you're so totally right, baby. Don't listen to her, she's just bringing you down.
He didn't want to listen. So he blew smoke rings and watched the cold rip it apart and blow it away to the still-gray sky. It looked like slate. It was a boring sky, and he hated it. He hated autumn. He hated winter. He zipped up his bomber jacket, wondering if he'd been outside long enough to turn the tip of his nose red. How long had he been sitting on the bench? He'd left the house to get away from Yoshino. She'd been crying while making dinner (not that he noticed right away from all the yelling), because she'd found the pot under his bed.
He grimaced. It was cold. Shikamaru shivered a little.
He filled himself with a little heat and watched a woman with a nice ass push a stroller down the park's sidewalk. He couldn't even see the baby, it was so filled with blankets and whatever-the-hell is in baby strollers.
His phone buzzed, and he perked up a little, only to deflate a second later.
New text message: Ino
I'm sorry babe. Can't tonight. Having Sakura over.
He bristled a little, fingers tapping on the screen.
Seriously?
She didn't reply to that, and he guessed that was fine, because they would have fought about it anyway, and Shikamaru didn't care to fight with anyone right now. Like a bum without a bed, he swung his legs over and laid down on the metal bench.
Ino and Sakura made for a pair he didn't particularly care for, and Sakura herself was so, so, so troublesome. Always crying. Eighty percent of the time he was sure it was about Sasuke, and his frown turned into a grimace. He knew there was some story behind that stony exterior. One of the most popular senior boys in the school, and he'd drifted from his crowd within the last year, turned into some lone wolf, which somehow made him more enticing than boring and predictable. But, Shikamaru could handle him, even if he sometimes caught him eying Ino. And it annoyed him. Annoyed him to think that at one time Sasuke and Ino had been together. He wondered if Sakura ever thought the same thing.
Then he realized he hadn't thought about it in a while, and he puffed on his joint thoughtfully.
But Sakura...Sakura was always needing other people when someone else wanted them. And when it was Ino she wanted, Sakura was always whispering secrets and who-knows-what, so when Shikamaru caught the girls eying him, he could see Sakura's eyes cut him in a way that made him feel like the wad of gum stuck under the table in study hall. He'd wonder if Ino would, briefly, see him like that too.
Even worse, Ino talked about Sakura so much lately that the little things Sakura had said about him would worm into the conversation, making him want to do anything but listen. Not to mention, that little fiasco with Naruto seemed to be the only juicy thing Ino had to obsess over (well, he supposed she was genuinely angry), and Shikamaru heard no end of it. If Naruto could have just held on to that note a little longer maybe he would have been spared-
Nah. It almost made him feel guilty to admit it, but it made him laugh. Why would anyone put something like that in a note and give it away to someone else who didn't know it was a big secret, let alone what was even inside, and who you didn't know that well?
He blew more smoke rings.
Well, Naruto was chill in his book, no matter what Ino said. Kid had this interesting way of making a dull moment seem less boring. Shikamaru couldn't put his finger on what it was, but there was something about him. Some of that sappy, genuine shit that made you reconsider turning a blind eye, just to see what Naruto would do next. But Ino seemed intent on making the guy seem like a real ass.
Why do you always take everyone else's side? Just give Sakura a chance for once. Take her seriously! Ino had demanded.
He snorted. Yeah fucking right.
"I don't need to take anything seriously," he said to no one as he exhaled, "I already take it all very seriously, unlike some people."
"Talking to yourself isn't very attractive."
Shikamaru jerked upright, blinking at a woman leaning on a tree. She was cradling a cup of Starbucks coffee, and Shikamaru had never seen anyone like her. She was pale, but like porcelain, not in some sick-with-cancer sort of way. Her hair had been dyed a shocking purple, and she had a few piercings.
"I could say the same to people who barge into other people's one-sided conversations uninvited," he drawled back. She chuckled. For a few moments, she didn't speak, and Shikamaru just listened to the shrill laughs of the kids at the playground.
"You should really put that out before one of the moms over there figures out what that is," she said finally.
He blew out another cloud and reluctantly had to admit she was right. Grudgingly, he sat upright and stamped it out.
"They weren't looking anyway."
She smirked. "Doesn't matter. You already look stoned."
"Thanks," he said with a sigh. She shrugged and took another sip of her coffee, shivering in her peacoat and one of those too-thin fashion scarves Shikamaru didn't understand. He put his head in his hands and thought about walking back home.
The girl seemed to sense his impending departure. "Might wanna wait a while. Wouldn't want your mom catching you looking like that."
He swiveled his gaze over to her half-heartedly. "I'm avoiding her. That's why I'm on this bench." He wondered why he'd even said anything back. For some reason, weed made him chatty, and the girl was interesting to look at.
She made a little noise that could have been a laugh or her choking on coffee. Or both. "Well that makes two of us, kid."
"Your mom on your ass too?"
"It's not my mom I'm avoiding," she said shortly. He watched her for a while.
"Boyfriend? Not that it's any of my business anyway," he added. She smiled a little, but it wasn't sincere.
"My husband," she clarified. "I told him I was pregnant so he told me he was dying. Literally." She pulled a face as if to say what an ass, am I right?, but her bottom lip quivered and she quickly sipped on her coffee. Shikamaru blinked, taken off guard by her openness, her strangeness. He whistled lowly.
She nodded. "Yep."
"Well...kids aren't that bad," he said lamely. He saw her smirk. When she didn't say anything, he found he didn't like the silence. "If he's actually dying, don't you think you better, ya know, go talk to him?"
"Maybe." She crumpled her Styrofoam cup and started picking at the peeling black polish on her nails.
"But I think I'm going to go to someone else first." She had a strange look on her face as she said it, something that might have been anger, or sadness, or just spite.
"What are you going to do?" He was as curious as he was hungry.
"Talk to his parents, see what they can tell me about his cancer. Might explain why they were pissed as all hell when we eloped. Maybe they think I knew and took advantage of it? I don't know."
He had nothing to say to that. This random conversation was already getting too serious for him. So he stayed quiet. Sometimes people liked that; just listening instead of prattling off about what they thought their audience should do.
At least, Shikamaru knew he would have appreciated it.
"I've got to know what's really going on." Maybe she needed to convince somebody, or just herself. Shikamaru had seen that on people on a few times-that need to convince yourself what you were doing was right or had no effect on anything else you wanted to do, because hell! You were above that shit anyway, and you could do what you wanted when you were done with it. It wasn't so hard.
Wait.
Maybe that was just himself.
Either way, the girl must not have had anyone to talk to about it, or she wouldn't be talking to the stoned teen who'd just tried to sleep on the park bench instead of going home to face his mother. She must have literally had no one else to turn to at that moment. Or at least, no one else she wanted to talk to about it.
"Yeah, I guess," he agreed. With that, the girl ran trembling fingers through her hair. She took a gulp of air, like she'd been holding her breath.
"I better get going. I'm already late. Told his mom I'd be there for dinner an hour ago."
Shikamaru nodded slowly. "Yeah, okay. Good luck."
"Don't freeze your ass off on that bench, kid," she said with a wave, and Shikamaru watched her go. He'd hadn't even asked for her name. He guessed it didn't matter, but now he was alone again.
He got up off the bench and started walking.
When Shikamaru passed the storefronts downtown, he always secretly looked at his passing reflection. Right now, in his haze, he squinted at the boy in the glass and wondered if that was really himself.
Did he really look as stoned as that girl had said? A police car came down the road and Shikamaru's spine straightened so fast it almost cracked. Did smokers always slouch? Would a stoned person stand straighter? He thought so. He laughed.
Lights had already been strung out on the little trees that lined the sidewalks, the lamp posts, the stoplights. They all blinked like little fireflies stuck in the chill.
He wandered into Starbucks and ordered a coffee. He ended up sitting across from some kid who was scribbling away on a notebook with a fierce look that made him seem like he was attacking the paper with his pencil, and Shikamaru had to snort.
What was this, study hour?
He got a glare from the nerd across from him, a silent fuck you that maybe Shikamaru deserved, but then his phone began to chirp in his pocket.
New text message: Ino
Stop sulking and just come over already. God. Just for you, I'm sacrificing 90210 .
He grinned.
...
Mrs. Yamanaka was the type of woman you saw once and talked about later. She was a stunner for a forty-something, but that wasn't what got you. She had this way of making yesterday seem like it got sucked into a black hole every time he saw her.
Maybe it was the alcohol, or the make-up, or the way she kept trying to look twenty. Maybe it was why Ino was the way she was, and never let him forget his shit. But Shikamaru secretly enjoyed it. Mrs. Yamanaka never seemed to remember if he'd done anything wrong, if he was an ass one night, if he'd taken her Grey Goose the other night in plain sight. And if she had, she just smiled at him anyway, like he was golden.
Every damn time.
"Shika! Ino said you were coming." She smiled that Barbie smile again, and even when he walked away, she kept on talking.
Ino was in the dining room, sitting on the edge of a table that was only used for Thanksgiving and when her father had business partner over, looking Heaven-sent. Just what he needed. And he sighed. Her hair was loose, fanning around her shoulders like gossamer. He almost didn't see Sakura, off in the corner with some Hispanic pretty boy to her left.
"Hey, baby." Ino didn't move from her spot on the table. Only smiled and patted the table with acrylic nails. She nodded at the boy next to Sakura as he hopped up beside her.
"Jon, Shikamaru. Shikamaru, Jon." Ino flipped her hair.
Pretty boy looked up and waved. "Sup."
And there was nothing else left to say after that, because Mrs. Yamanaka wandered in trying to gossip with the girls like she was still seventeen. The boys moved to the living room to get away from saying "sure" and trying to look interested too many times. 90210 was playing, all drama and kissing and ex-boyfriends on the sidelines.
Shikamaru sighed and sank into the couch like he could disappear in the cushions. That left him with the guy named Jon, sitting on the couch, watching the colors and the way the actresses glossy lips moved when they talked.
He sighed again, closing his eyes. "You Sakura's new guy?"
Jon blinked, as if coming out of a stupor. It took him a second to asnwer. "Nah," he said.
Interesting.
"We've just known each other since we were kids. Been hanging out lately."
"Nice."
"Yep."
An awkward silence settled between them. Jon fidgeted, tugging at the leg of his jeans like they were pinching his thighs. Shikamaru sighed for a third time, long and drawn out, and took out the join he'd kept in his pocket. What the hell, right? Mrs. Yamanaka laughed like a machine gun, and the girls weren't doing anything too interesting.
"Wanna hit?"
Jon shrugged. And that's when Shikamaru's boring night got interesting.
...
The window was open, and the cold felt good, oh so good, on his face. Shikamaru let his arm lean out the open window, pretending to catch the wind with his fingers.
The girls had sent the boys on a Red Box run. And get something good, Ino had demanded. I don't wanna watch anything too scary.
Shikamaru liked scary. It made Ino scoot closer. Sometimes she'd dip her hand a little lower, resting on the inside of his thigh, and he liked the thrill of thinking her mother was in the kitchen and could walk in anytime.
But not this time.
There'd be chick flicks. Maybe some obscure drama that he'd never seen out in theaters that probably had Matthew McConaughey in it. He let his head loll on the seat, and goddamn, did Jon have the best fucking seats. His ass almost felt too warm. He could have fallen asleep.
"Dude, you know what would make this night a hell of a lot better?" He was getting bored of the idea of returning with nothing but a movie.
Jon took a left, turning the wheel with one hand. He glanced over at Shikamaru. "Yeah, what?"
"Some guys to chill with," Shikamaru sighed. "Dunno about you, but Ino's mom has a laugh that makes me wanna shoot myself after a while, and I'm fucking sick of hearing about Yuki. Heh, how'd you even end up there?"
Jon laughed. "I'll probably split soon," he admitted. Shikamaru cracked open an eye.
"I'll probably be there till fucking Tuesday," he said with another sigh, putting his feet up without bothering to wonder if he was making himself too comfortable. He looked out the window again, at the lights and the sidewalk and the people clustered on the cement, and he grinned, rapping the door with his hand.
"Hey, hey, hey, pull over! Pull over. Hey Naruto!" he cried, and he didn't notice Jon stiffen, just shot him a weird look when the car jerked and he parked clumsily.
"Dude, you can't parallel park or what? Hey, Naruto!" Shikamaru slipped out of the car, waving, and for once in his life he was glad for he'd decided to be a little spontaneous.
Maybe it was weed. What had that guy called it again?
Naruto was walking down the sidewalk, hands stuffed in his jacket, looking like one of those lost, wandering souls in movies who actually found something important by the end. He'd almost been swallowed by the crowd, an ear bud in one ear, a gray beanie covering his bright hair.
He turned, saw Shikamaru, smiled. They fist bumped, shared a "what's up, dude?" and Shikamaru complained about Ino. Naruto snickered. Shikamaru wondered why Jon hadn't wandered out of the car by now.
"Doing anything right now?"
Naruto wasn't. "Just being dragged around by my grandma." He pulled a face, jabbing a thumb at Macy's.
"Wanna hang?" Shikamaru asked, and Naruto looked relieved.
"Yeah."
It was then, at that precise moment, that Shikamaru's night took a turn.
Naruto put his hands behind his neck, like a runner trying to catch his breath, opened his mouth to say something Shikamaru would never hear as they walked toward the car after Naruto called his grandmother, and something in his face changed when he looked up. It was almost dramatic. The way the carefree, easy going smile slipped and Naruto's mouth went slack, the way his hands dropped to his sides, and Shikamaru thought he looked sick.
Shikamaru looked up from watching his feet, trying to see what it was that had turned his loud friend silent, and noticed that Jon had gotten out of the car and was waiting by the park meter, just watching, eyes wide. Jon said, "hey". He looked like he couldn't decide what to do with his hands, whether to wave, or nod, or do nothing at all.
"I…" Naruto cleared his throat, standing still, and jerked his chin toward Jon. "You know that guy?" his voice was oddly higher, like he'd seen a ghost, strained. Shikamaru narrowed his eyes.
"Jon?" he asked, raising a brow. "You know him or something?" They were still far enough away to look and not be heard.
Naruto blinked, as if coming out of a stupor. He looked away. "No. Look man, I gotta go." He didn't look at Shikamaru once as he turned around. The lights on the spindly trees sprouting from the sidewalks and vined on the stoplights shone brighter as the evening crawled to an end. Had it gotten colder? Shikamaru shivered and walked after Naruto, who was trying to disappear.
"Hey, wait up!" Was he desperate? Shikamaru didn't know, but he knew he had two choices: go back to Ino's, or go back home.
He didn't want to go back home.
"Man, don't ditch me after you already said you'd come, you don't know what I'm going through here/" And the night was just starting to get better. He swung a loose arm over Naruto's shoulder. He watched the muscles in Naruto's jaw tick.
"Do me a solid. C'mon. Whatever shit you got with that guy," he nodded towards Jon, "can't be that bad. Besides, there's no way I'm hiding out at Ino's with no one but her mom and Sakura and 90210-"
Naruto wriggled in his hold. He shook his head and took a deep breath, so his exhale fogged out like a cloud. "Look-"
"Just for a little while-"
"Why-"
"You just gonna leave me hangin'?"
"Naruto," called Jon, who seemed to finally decide to do something with himself, and this time Naruto swatted Shikamaru away with a little force than was really necessary.
What was this, the zombie apocalypse? Damn.
"Calm your shit, dude, geez. What's your problem? C'mon, don't make me go back there, my day's been fucking stupid as it is-"
Naruto was getting impatient, but Shikamaru didn't really care just then. Naruto's hands were still in his pockets, and he gave Shikamaru this look like anyone did whenever they thought he was being ass. "Dude, you ever not think of your fucking self for just a minute?"
Shikamaru stared at him.
"Aw, fuck you," he said, and Naruto shook his head again. "Alright, fine, go shop til you drop with your grandma. Don't know what you damn deal is."
He watched Naruto walk away quickly, too quickly, disappear in the crowd like he'd never been there, and Shikamaru wished he'd come back, so he could elbow him in the gut. Jon caught up with him then.
"What the fuck did you ever do to him? Thought he didn't know you?" he wanted to know. Jon didn't say anything.
Well. This was just perfect. No friends tonight. Kiba was busy doing whoknowswhat, Shino was with a girl, and Chouji was actually studying. Which was stupid, because Chouji never studied, and Chouji never ditched him.
The thought stung, and there was no one else but Jon to complain to.
"Whatever man, just take me home, I'm not going back there. Done with this shit." He kicked at nothing on the sidewalk, and Jon drove him home in silence.
When they pulled into the driveway Shikamaru stomach did a flip, and it almost hurt.
You ever not think of yourself for a minute?
Next time he saw Naruto, he was going to give him hell for this. Jon had long ago stopped being even remotely interesting to Shikamaru. The guy hadn't said a single word since they got back in the car, and that look on his face-like a kicked puppy!- was starting to piss Shikamaru off.
"Well, thanks or whatever. Just tell Ino my mom called me home." He got out of the car, took his time walking to the door, opened it up slow.
It was nearly nine by then.
He found his mother sitting in the living room, reading some historical romance novel, the kind she never got enough of.
"You're home," she said, without looking up.
Shikamaru swallowed. "Yeah." He wondered if what he was feeling was guilt. He sighed. The seconds kept ticking by. Yoshino didn't say a word. Just kept reading.
"I'm sorry," he said finally, patting the wall with his hand, and trudged back to his room. He collapsed on the bed, called Ino and talked to her in a low voice, texted Chouji, hoping for a response that too long to come by, and finally, found one from Naruto.
New text message: Naruto Uzumaki
Didn't mean to freak.
Shikamaru sighed.
It's all good.
He fell asleep staring at the ceiling, pretending he was already dreaming when his mother peeked in.
A/N: This was a pivotal point, for more than just one reason. We will see Naruto next chapter. He and Sasuke and perhaps Itachi are next. We're also starting to see more of Naruto being centered around characters, and him having an effect on them. That's why my cast is so large, so many PoVs. Eventually, Naruto will be in every single one, and they'll each come to know something about themselves after him. Yes, there's more to this, but I decided to put some up early since this hasn't been updated in...forever, so here's a bit of it. Why have I been gone from this site for like...six months (since June...I think? I returned to it in general last week)? Well there's a story to that, and frankly, the last half of it is just depressing. So I'll spare you, and me. I started writing again in the midst of it all, like. Last week. I'm alternating between fics. I just finished Pitch Black's Midnight Fright, and I was so happy I was actually sad when I was done, am fixing up the introduction for the end of Fortune because quite frankly I have a love-hate relationship with that one lately, and redid the entire first chapter of Your Heart in Black which will be up soon and completed. I've been busy. Also, an outline for Euphoria now has a skeleton. Now, onto BTW!
I'm not happy with Sasuke's intro yet. Here's a line for next chapter that is not changing:
It was like a secret ritual between the brothers, some rite of passage. The approval. If Sasuke never looked twice at Itachi's new girlfriend, Itachi would pause to reevaluate. If Itachi took one look and chuckled, Sasuke would pause to wonder what the hell was so damn funny.
