DISCLAIMER: I do not own "Naruto"

Chapter 29: Change

Naruto lay face down on his bed, his arms hanging over the edge as he carved the floor with a kunai. His thoughts were a vicious circle that knew no end. Sakura's words rang through his head, a tolling, lying bell. It had been a warning, but he hadn't understood. He was so angry that she left him behind…just like he did. They had both left him and now he was alone. Again.

He had woken to Kakashi's silver hair and the flying forest. It took him a moment to realize they were the ones moving and not the world. It took him longer to remember what had happened. When his drug-fogged mind cleared, the memories flooded him and with it came rage…and fear. Instantly, he was seeing red and it took all the control he had to subdue the taunting Kyuubi. He had tried to make Kakashi go back for Sakura, but his old sensei refused. She'd made her choice. They couldn't stop her.

Naruto couldn't believe that she had betrayed them. It couldn't be true. She wouldn't, not for him. Oh, please, not for that traitor. She was smarter than that.

"But she loves…"

Not him. Not like she loved Sasuke. But why would she say all those things? What was her plan? Would she be weak to the love she felt and betray her village? Or would she be strong and…

And what? Could Sakura defeat Sasuke?

How he hated Sasuke right now. They were brothers, best friends, but right now, he couldn't choke down the resentment he was feeling. They were bitter rivals and close friends—as close friends as you could be with Sasuke. And he had thrown it all away for power and revenge. He had injured their bonds. And now…and now he had taken Sakura away.

There was a knocking on his window that pulled Naruto from his thoughts. He looked up to see Kakashi perched outside.

"Kakashi-sensei?"

"The Fifth needs to see you."

They walked in silence. It was heavy and suffocating. He knew something was wrong because Kakashi didn't have his book open. Naruto stared at the pavement as they walked, counting the cracks to distract his mind. Though the distance from his apartment to the Hokage Tower wasn't far, it felt as if their walk stretched on and on. When they did finally reach the Tower, two giant toads were perched outside. Naruto looked up at them in slight surprise.

"Boss Toad and Gamakichi? What're you guys doing here? Did something happen?"

"Yeah, Naruto—"

"Gamakichi! Keep yer trap shut. Tsunade'll tell 'em!" the Boss Toad berated the younger toad.

Naruto's brow furrowed and he looked at Kakashi. "What's up with them?"

"Come on."

Naruto's eyes narrowed. He caught the sorrow in his sensei's eye, though it was slight. When they finally reached Tsunade's office, Shizune, Sai, and more toads were there as well. Naruto entered the room cautiously, his eyes bulging with confusion. The way everyone looked at him, he was certain they had just been talking about him.

"So this here kid's Jiraiya-boy's pupil?" an elderly toad asked.

"Hai, this is Uzumaki Naruto," Tsunade said. "The 'destined child,' I suppose."

"What's going on?" Naruto asked. "What's with the old toad?"

"Be respectful, Naruto," Tsunade said tiredly. "This is one of the great head hermits of Myouboku Mountain, Fukasaku-sama. He came a long way to see you."

Naruto looked at the old toad expectantly. He sighed and his yellow eyes stared back. "So you're Jiraiya-boy's pupil."

"Boy?" Naruto asked incredulously. "Do you think the perverted hermit's your lackey? What's your problem?"

"Watch your mouth!" Tsunade growled. "Need I tell you again? He's Jiraiya's teacher. Fukasaku-sama is great and wise. He taught Jiraiya the hermit-style ninjutsu."

Naruto felt the heat rise to his cheeks.

Fukasaku burst into cackling laughter. "Hahaha! Perverted hermit! Ya got the same attitude as Jiraiya, kiddo."

The corners of Naruto's mouth drew into a tense line. "All right, old toad," he said in a carefully calm tone. "What is it you want to tell me?"

Fukasaku suddenly became very solemn. "Hmm. Where do I begin? I guess I'd better just spit it out…" His yellow toad eyes penetrated Naruto's being. "Jiraiya-boy was killed in battle."

The heart inside Naruto's chest stopped, or that's what it felt like. He couldn't breathe, his tongue was choking him. Sharp pain, like a kunai piercing flesh, savagely attacked his soul. His nose tingled with searing air and salty tears were hiding behind his impossibly heavy eyes. This couldn't be right, but his very body told him it was.

"Wha?"

"Durin' his fight, Pein crushed poor Jiraiya-boy's throat. Before he fell fer the last time, he left one final message." Fukasaku grabbed his robe and removed it, revealing numbers carved into his wart-covered back.

"A code…" Shizune said.

"This is what Jiraiya-boy died for."

Naruto bowed his head as anger swirled through his veins. His pulse raced with an uncomfortable desire to lash out. He forced his tensing knuckles to relax. He swallowed to wet his parched throat. "Granny…did you send him there?" he whispered.

Tsuande sighed. "Yes…I did."

"What the hell were you thinking?" Naruto yelled, his face contorted with anger. "Why did you let him go on such a risky—"

"Naruto, that's enough," Kakashi said forcefully.

Naruto clamped his jaw shut and glared at those around him.

"Don't you understand how Lady Tsunade feels?"

Naruto turned away. Closing his eyes tight, he forced his limbs to move. "If he'd been Hokage, Jiraiya would never have made you go on that mission, Granny."

Tsunade felt his words like an arrow through her heart.

Without another word, Naruto left the building and began the quietly somber walk home. Memories of Jiraiya came unbidden to his distressed mind. Memories of happier times. He had spent so much time with the pervert…and he had learned much from him. And now he, too, was gone.

His reverie was broken when he heard his name. A familiar, happy voice greeted him, followed by the scarred face of Iruka.

"I hear you're doing all sorts of dangerous missions these days." Iruka smiled and an impressed twinkle lit up his eyes. "Everyone in the village is talking about you. How 'bout we hang, for old time's sake? We could hit up Ichiraku, eh? Get some ramen?"

Naruto couldn't meet his former sensei's eyes. So he carefully walked around Iruka and passed by with a fleeting, "No, thanks." He returned to his apartment and changed into more comfortable clothes before returning to his bed. He sat bent over his knees and let loose the tears that prickled his eyes. The sparkling drops fell free, soaking the fabric of his pants. The sobs he tried to withhold made their way up his raw throat.

He felt so alone.

~.~.~

Sakura held her notebook just inches from her nose. The firelight wasn't enough to read by easily, but it didn't quite matter since she'd been on the same page for the past half hour. It felt like gravity had taken an immense interest in her eyelids. She stifled a yawn.

"Go to sleep," Sasuke said.

Sakura's eyes slowly moved to look at the dark blur she knew was Sasuke. "I'll go to sleep when you go to sleep."

Sasuke frowned. "You don't trust me."

"Should I?" she asked flatly.

The crease in Sasuke's brow deepened. Sakura had always placed her trust in him, no matter what. He knew her trust in him had shattered the instant he knocked her out and he had yet to give her a new reason to trust him. It was startling to discover how that one choice affected so many things. It affected everything, he supposed. His decision had a ripple effect of sorts. Sakura wasn't immune to it. Her everlasting love had boundaries.

"You haven't been studying. You've been watching me."

A single pink brow rose on Sakura's face. "And here I thought I was being discreet."

"I told you I was returning because I want to," he growled. "There is no need to watch me."

Sakura's sleepy gaze cleared with intensity. "Are you forgetting that, according to Konoha, you're a criminal? How do I know you won't change your mind?"

"Are you calling me a coward?"

"When I wake up, will you still be there?" Sakura's voice was low and her face tense.

Sasuke understood now. This had nothing to do with her being a good kunoichi who properly did her job. This was about her personally. She was afraid he would leave her again. He felt a clash of thoughts and feelings as he realized this. He thought she was selfish and annoying. It was always about her. But he also felt guilty for hurting her. He wanted to express that guilt…but that was not something Uchiha Sasuke did.

He smirked. "If I wanted to leave, it'd be that easy."

Sakura's face darkened. Her eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared. "Oh, really?"

She placed her notebook aside and stood abruptly. She stomped over and glowered down at him. He made to stand, but suddenly felt Sakura's palm connect with his forehead. A horrible ache sprouted at the contact and made the world spin around him.

"What did you do?" he roared.

A moment later, blacking out, he fell sideways onto his mat.

"Enjoy your nap," Sakura said bitterly.

The next day was not a pleasant one. Sasuke awoke spitting obscenities from his mouth like venom. Sakura knew how to handle venom, and so his words didn't sting like he had hoped. His mood was foul for the remainder of the day. He glared daggers at her, hoping she would start crying and plead for his forgiveness. This thought process only made him feel worse. So he seethed while Sakura ignored him. And that night, when she tried to heal him, Sasuke knocked her hands away.

"Don't touch me!" he said bitingly.

"Don't be a baby. I'm not going to hurt you." Sakura returned his glare.

His eye twitched.

"Sasuke," she said through her clenched teeth. "Cooperate."

It was so strange to see her act so…assertive. When had she grown so confident in her attitude toward him? This was certainly a side of her that had only been hinted at in her letters. Actually, he did recall her being abusive to Naruto. But that was Naruto. He was Sasuke, the one she was supposed to be in love with. This was not how someone who was in love acted. Well, he wasn't exactly sure about that, but it sounded right in his head.

She was frustrating.

However, if he wanted everything to run smoothly when he returned to Konoha, it was in his best interest to get on Sakura's good side. His pride would suffer in the weeks to come.

His scowling subsided and he reached for her hands and pulled them to his face. Sakura gasped at his touch and watched in surprise as he placed her fingers on his forehead. His eyes were oddly soft. After the initial shock, Sakura regained her composure and began channeling chakra to her fingers. Healing always felt wonderful, but for some reason, when she poured her chakra into Sasuke, it felt…

It felt right. It felt wrong. Her calm chakra mingled with his chaotic chakra and it felt like a completion of herself. Her chakra was a constant, like a smooth baseline, while his was changing in intensity like a fierce melody. They complimented each other as they moved to the same beat, the beat of their two drumming hearts. The mixing of their chakras gave Sakura a thrill. She felt excitement and utter joy. With such strong emotion raging through her, it was always so difficult to keep herself professional. The irritation she had been previously experiencing was forgotten in the wake of the healing. She wondered what Sasuke felt. As always, his face gave away no hints.

After a half hour, Sakura reluctantly pulled her hands away from his face. Almost instantly, Sasuke's demeanor changed. He looked tired. She backed away and, though she was still watching, he lay down and closed his eyes, dropping his guard. In only seconds, he was asleep. Sakura gazed at him in wonder. He was so beautiful. She could stare at him all night, but she figured it'd be best to let him sleep in peace.

Peace was one thing he didn't get however. Late in the night, Sasuke began to thrash fretfully in his sleep. He moaned incoherently and growled. His tossing woke Sakura and she watched in mild horror. Working up the nerve, Sakura rushed over to his side.

"Sasuke! Sasuke wake up!" she yelled frantically.

He jolted upright, his arm swinging to strike her. Sakura caught his fist instinctively. They stared wide eyed at each other. He was panting and his skin glistened with sweat. Sakura had never seen such emotion in his eyes. He yanked his hand away from her and turned away.

"I…I didn't mean—"

"Shh." Sakura shook her head. "It's okay."

They sat in silence for a long while. Sasuke's head hung, his dark hair curtaining his face, and his hands were limp in his lap. Sakura sat with him until sleep began to pull her back into its embrace. She yawned and Sasuke glanced at her from the corner of his eye.

"Go to sleep," he said.

"I'll go t'sleep when you go t'sleep," she mumbled.

"I'll take watch."

"A'right," she mumbled back and he thought it had been too easy to convince her.

Sakura curled on the mat right beside Sasuke, her head against the side of his leg. He looked down to see thick-lashed lids hiding Sakura's green eyes. Her mouth was slightly agape as she snored softly and a few stray curls of pink hair fell across her face. Sasuke smirked. He reached down and carefully tucked the rebellious strands behind her ear.

A few days later, as they walked side by side, Sakura wondered how long had she dreamt of this? Years. Three and a half. She was seventeen and finally walking side by side as equals with Sasuke. Or…she hoped he considered her an equal. And though everything was finally falling into place, she couldn't help the feeling of turmoil growing inside her stomach. Something wasn't right and she couldn't ignore it. Perhaps it was just the guilt of leaving Naruto returning to torment her. Perhaps it was the awaiting punishment Sasuke would face that was worrying her. Perhaps it was the silence between them that was making her paranoid. Maybe it was all three or none of them. One thing was for certain and it was that Sakura's nerves were screaming.

She'd gotten very good at masking her emotions—depression is a cruel teacher—but to Sasuke, who'd been doing that his whole life, her attempt was a poor one. He could see right through her.

"What's wrong?" His voice appeared as if rising from the depths of an ocean of silence.

She glanced at him and smiled. "Nothing." Her brow furrowed slightly. "Why?"

Sasuke frowned. "Don't be an idiot. I know something's bothering you."

Sakura's eyes narrowed further in suspicion. "You're concerned about what's bothering me?" About me?

Sasuke's jaw tensed. He heard the unasked question and, though he wanted to look away, he trained his steely gaze on Sakura.

She sighed. "I've just got a lot on my mind."

"You were never really one to be so quiet," Sasuke remarked.

A dry laugh escaped Sakura's lips. "You were never one to be so talkative." She looked at him, green eyes sharp with an unnamed emotion. "We've both changed. Perhaps it's time to stop expecting each other to be who we were."

Sasuke studied her carefully. She certainly had changed.

Her gaze left his and she looked out as far into the distance as she could. "We'll be home soon."

Home. Unwanted nostalgia filled Sasuke for a brief moment before he smothered those emotions. He couldn't allow himself to think of Konoha as home. He would leave again once the elders were dead. Konoha was simply another destination on the road to the completion of his goal. He hardened his eyes and looked onward.

Sakura glanced at him from the corner of her eye. "Are you…nervous?"

He returned the sideways glance. "Don't ask stupid questions."

"Why is that a stupid question?"

He turned to look at her with an eyebrow raised as if that too was a stupid question.

Sakura stopped in her tracks and turned toward the raven-haired man who towered over her. "Sasuke, do you honestly think you'll get away with just a stern lecture and a slap on the wrist?" Her face was hard. "Haven't you thought about what will happen once you enter those gates?"

"Hn," he smirked.

Sakura's eyes became wild. Pulling her fingers through her pink locks in frustration, she said, "Maybe you haven't changed." She turned and started walking away briskly.

Sasuke was surprised that she would get frustrated by him so quickly. Her previous words struck him and he realized how stuck in his ways he truly was. It was time to start fresh. "Sakura," he said softly.

She went rigid.

He sighed. "I have thought about it." And then, reluctantly, "I am…apprehensive."

She glanced over her shoulder with tenderness in her green eyes and a small smile on her lips. Sasuke kept any trace of emotion from his face. He was beginning to realize how difficult this girl was going to make his life. She wanted him to be honest. She wanted him to open up. Those things made her feel important. Those things made her proud of him. Those things were so difficult for him to do.

Her smile broadened to a grin and she gestured for him to join her. He rolled his eyes but obediently obliged and took to the road beside her.

"I know you don't want to talk about—"

"But you do."

Startled, she blinked. "Y-you don't mind?"

"I didn't say that."

"Right." She bit her lip as her eyes darted away from him.

Sasuke sighed. "Don't worry about me, Sakura."

"How can you say that?" She passed in front of him and took a seat against a tree. "I've always worried about you." Her eyes looked at him accusingly. "Didn't you…" she stopped so she wouldn't embarrass herself.

"Worry about you?" He looked down his nose at her.

Her mouth parted with unspoken words. A slight hurt drew her face into tense lines. She looked down at her fingers. They were dry and callused and the skin around her nails was cracked and torn. She felt like her fingers were a fine representation of her heart at that moment.

Sasuke's mouth tightened. Slowly, he lifted his foot and then the next until he was standing in front of Sakura. Hesitantly he lowered himself down beside her and crossed his arms. He closed his eyes briefly as he fought with himself about what he was about to say. He didn't like how fragile their conversation—relationship—was. What was she doing to him?

His words were heavy as they crawled from his tongue and out his mouth. "Of course I worried about you." He heard her tiny gasp, but she remained fixated on her fingers. Not meeting her eyes, he licked his chapped lips and forced out more uncomfortable words. "I was afraid Itachi would hurt you."

She looked at him then with eyes that sparkled with understanding.

"I thought that if I killed him, you would be safe."

"It wasn't just revenge?" Sakura's voice was a mere whisper.

"It started out that way." Sasuke stared into the distance, his eyes unfocused as if lost in his thoughts. "Team Seven," a droll snort escaped him. "An annoyance I can't get rid of."

A tear fell from Sakura's lashes and tumbled down her cheek, leaving a glistening trail behind. "You missed us, too," she said with a smile.

He looked at her with a strange softness. "How can I miss something that never left me?"

Sakura's eyes widened.

He smirked at how quickly he could make her speechless. "Do you realize how annoying it is to have hawks hunting you down everywhere you go?"

She giggled. "Probably just as annoying as never getting a reply to your letters."

He chuckled.

Sakura looked at him, really looked at him. He was just as handsome as ever, even the dirt clinging to his pores couldn't hide that. But, though his mouth had the slightest tilt upwards, she could see a lingering emotion in his dark eyes. It was the purple bruises beneath his eyes that told of insomnia, it was the hollowness of his cheeks, the strange color of his skin. He was…suffering. Something haunted his soul, some evil tormented him. She could see the ghost hiding behind the attractive man with raven hair. A darkness masked by indifference.

Sorrow filled her. She wanted to understand, she wanted him to tell her what was plaguing him. Slowly—cautiously—she lowered her head onto his shoulder and instantly felt him stiffen. She winced and was about to retreat when he began to relax. She smiled sadly. They'd been travelling together for weeks now and it was drawing to a quick close. Konoha was only days away…and they would be separated. It hadn't been a smooth journey, but she wasn't ready to let him go again. She had just gotten him back. He was still guarded around her, but he had also opened in a way she never thought possible for him. He had been cooperative in answering any questions she had about the Akatsuki or Madara. Team Taka was a sensitive subject, but he didn't hide any information from her. The oddest thing, the most unexpected change, was that he spoke to her almost kindly and he tolerated her touch—which she reserved for the healing sessions. Now, however, she was being weak in drawing comfort from his presence.

She didn't want Tsunade to take him from her.

"You could be executed," she whispered.

"Are you having second thoughts about me returning?" His deep tones resounded through her.

"No." She closed her eyes and drew in a slow breath through her nose. "I'm just warning you."

"Do you think the Hokage will make that order?"

Sakura thought for a moment before answering confidently. "No."

"Then don't worry." Sasuke turned so he could look at her face. She seemed so despondent.

She looked up at him making the distance between their faces shrink. Her breath tickled the skin on his neck and he swallowed. Her eyes were inquisitive and nothing more. He didn't see anything more in her face, nothing to betray discomfort or nervousness. Had she grown so comfortable with him in these past weeks?

"Why are you being so nice to me?"

Sasuke turned away.

"Tell me something, Sasuke."

"Hm?"

"You keep asking about my worries," she paused and frowned. "What is it that's making it hard for you to sleep?"

His eye twitched. "That's my business."

"As are my worries," she replied without missing a beat.

"You are so annoying."

She smiled fondly. "So are you."

He looked at her with furrowed brows.

"Fine, don't tell me," she replied. "I expect you to stop harassing me though."

Sasuke snorted. "Harassing? Nice."

She snickered. And then she sobered. "But…when you're ready to tell me, I'll be here."


A/N: Sorry for the slow update. I wasn't quite satisfied with the end result of my first draft, so I took some time to revisit and revise. So the scene with Sakura and Sasuke at each other's throats in the middle wasn't even there. I added that to add depth to their relationship. When I originally wrote the chapter, it felt like a lot had happened between them already, but we'd missed it all. So I added that scene to kind of show how their journey had been going. So...what do you think? I'm happy with it, but more importantly, are you happy with it?

Next chapter will be updated on schedule, hopefully. Hopefully I like the chapter on the first go.

So thanks for all the reviews as always. And as always, thanks to Sakura's Indecision for beta-ing.

Peace!