Mostly fluff. I'm not even ashamed.
Callie
"I got you something."
I find my wife in the attendings' lounge, sitting in the corner of the couch scrolling through her phone. She'd come in a little early just to round on a few of her patients, but she's still dressed in plain clothes underneath her white coat. I've always loved the professional look on her - the black slacks, the simple burgundy blouse underneath her jacket, stethoscope slung around her neck. The sapphire on her ring finger catches my eye and I smile. She doesn't wear it every day when she's performing surgery, understandably, usually opting just to keep her wedding band on - but I've noticed that she's developed the habit of wearing it whenever something important is going on. Whenever she's stressed about something.
She looks up after a second, smiling at my voice and slipping her phone into her jacket pocket.
"Hey. I was just about to text you and see if you were here yet."
Holding out the small paper bag and paper cup, I raise my eyebrow a little.
"We've still got twenty minutes, don't worry."
"Ooh, you brought me Dunkin Donuts!"
She sits up and grabs both items, setting the cup on the arm of the couch before pulling out her favourite, maple glazed doughnut with a delighted look.
"Just what I needed."
"I should scold you for not eating breakfast before you left home," I drop onto the couch beside her, "like I seem to remember someone doing when I was pregnant. But I figured today deserved a doughnut. And that awful sugary mocha whatever drink you like so much."
Chewing a big bite of the sugary pastry, the blonde leans back with a content sigh, picking up the warm cup.
"A little mocha now and then is just what the soul needs."
She leans over and kisses my cheek sweetly before focusing on her breakfast again, and I take a minute to study her profile, tucking a wave of blonde hair back from her face.
"Excited?"
"Nervous."
Her answer comes immediately as she raises the cup to take a sip, but her face is surprisingly calm.
"But excited too. I didn't think...I never thought I'd be doing this again, to be honest. That we would," she turns to me and grins, "so yeah, I think excitement is winning out. I just want everything to be okay."
I let my hand slide over her thigh, squeezing lightly. I know I can't promise things that are out of my hands - I know I shouldn't - like I shouldn't have after the plane crash. I can reassure her, but I can't know for certain that things are going to be okay any more than she can. Yet something in my gut tells me that everything is finally going to work out for us. We deserve it.
"I'm sure things are going to be okay. Come on," I climb up, holding out my hand, "let's head up."
The smaller woman downs the rest of her drink and grabs my hand, tugging herself up. I pull her close for just a moment, pressing a soft kiss to her lips, my tongue lightly running along hers for the briefest moment. Pulling back with a grin, I let her step back.
"Chocolaty."
It gets me a laugh, and she leads us out of the lounge and upstairs toward the peds and maternity floor. We're a few minutes early, but Dr. Neale spots us from down the hall and greets us with a friendly smile, waving us toward her as she hands over a clipboard to the nurse at the main desk.
"Arizona, Callie. All ready to go?"
"Yep, ready."
Arizona is all smiles as she greets Dr. Neale, and we follow her down the hall to an examination room set up with the ultrasound machine.
"Now, normally I'd just have a tech do this, but...since I kind of know you personally, Arizona, I thought I'd come in myself. You are okay with that, right?"
She flips the machine on and grabs her tablet, glancing up toward us as she speaks.
"Of course," the blonde replies with certainty, "I appreciate it, Jackie. I know treating fellow doctors can be..." she glances at me and laughs a little, "trying on the patience sometimes."
"Well, I am a woman with a lot of patience. I have three kids under the age of ten at home."
After tapping out a few things and scanning over Arizona's chart, she motions to the exam table.
"Alright, hop up and let's take a look."
My nerves are surfacing a little now that we're actually in here, and I hover unnecessarily close, helping the blonde up onto the table. She tugs her shirt up and, at Dr. Neale's request, pushes the waist of her pants down a little to expose her abdomen. As the other doctor squirts some cool gel onto her skin, her hand finds mine and she glances up, intertwining our fingers tightly.
We both watch as the doctor smoothly starts moving the ultrasound wand over her skin, and the grainy black and white image starts to materialize on the screen in front of her. She takes a few minutes, ensuring she has a clear image, and examines the screen carefully. I can see Arizona's eyes dart to the image as well, scanning it and looking carefully with her own medical knowledge, and I squeeze her hand lightly, a smile tugging at my lips.
"There we are," Jackie speaks after a moment, smiling at the two of us and turning the monitor more fully towards the exam table, "looks like your baby is right on track. Fourteen weeks on Thursday - we know that for certain given that you were inseminated here - and he, or she, is exactly the size they should be. I see no indications of any developmental concerns and the gestation sac is also growing well, so I see nothing to worry me there."
I smile down at Arizona, and see her let out a slight sigh of relief as her eyes remain glued to the monitor.
"And..."
Dr. Neale reaches forward and turns on the audio switch, and immediately the sound of a strong, quick little heartbeat fills the room, the steady rhythm displayed on the screen below the baby's image.
"We have a good, steady heartbeat. Listen to that."
Arizona grips my hand even tighter, and glancing down, I can see tears starting to pool in her brilliant blue eyes before a huge, awed smile spreads across her face.
"There's a heartbeat."
She speaks quietly, tearing her eyes away from the monitor to look up at me. An uncontrollable grin is plastered on my face as I look at her, every bit as amazed and awed as she is. I can hardly believe it. This is our baby. She's in there, and she's growing, and she's perfectly healthy. We are really having a baby.
"Yeah," I laugh softly, grinning at my beautiful wife, "there's a heartbeat."
The doctor lets us listen for a few minutes longer while she makes her notes on the chart, and then she shuts off the audio and has the machine print off a picture before wiping the gel off Arizona's stomach with a smile.
"Pretty exciting, isn't it?"
She tugs her gloves off and hands the photo to the blonde, and Arizona sits up, adjusting her clothes and just smiling at the picture with the same awed look on her face.
"It's amazing. It will always be amazing."
"And you've been feeling well? I assume you would have mentioned anything otherwise. The morning sickness wore off? No unusual stomach pains or cramps?"
"Not at all. I've been feeling really great, actually. Except that I have to pee all the time already."
I can't help the soft laugh that bubbles up as I watch the slight scrunching of my wife's nose.
"I told you that was the most annoying part."
Dr. Neale chuckles lightly as well, pushing the ultrasound machine back against the wall.
"It really is. Unfortunately, you can count on that continuing for the next six months. But if everything else feels good, then I'm happy. Welcome to your second trimester, Arizona."
I peer at the picture that the smaller woman is still holding, smiling at the tiny little image of our baby and running my hand lightly over her back.
"I'll book an appointment for you at twenty weeks for your next ultrasound, and for the amniocentesis if you still choose to have that done," Jackie smiles at us warmly, "take your time in here. I'll see you around soon I'm sure. Don't hesitate to find me or page me if you have any concerns."
The door clicks shut a few moments later and we're left alone in the silence of the room, the small grainy photo still held out in front of us. It feels every bit as incredible as it did five years ago when we were in this room seeing Sofia for the first time; every bit as awe-inspiring and magical - and this time there are no hesitations, no complications in our life.
"I understand how you felt now," Arizona laughs softly, smiling up at me, "I can't believe...I mean I knew there was a baby in there, but seeing this is..."
She glances at the photo again, then down briefly at her midsection as her hand slides over it.
"Wow."
I press a soft kiss to the top of her head and grin again.
"I know. Proof that you're growing an actual human being in there. You'd think being doctors that this wouldn't seem so incredible, but it's kind of freaking amazing, isn't it?"
"Really freaking amazing."
She tilts her head back to look at me and grins.
"And I feel a little less like a Paranoid Patti now."
Sliding off the exam table, she straightens her clothes and grabs her lab coat, tucking the photo carefully into the side pocket of my purse before I pick it up.
"Now you'll just be more like a Worried Wanda - which is totally acceptable."
"I wasn't that worried when you were pregnant."
I pull the door open for her and just glance over with a raised eyebrow.
"You made me drink liquid kale, didn't want me to touch a drop of caffeine, and wouldn't even let me carry a single grocery bag. And you used to steal my chart and double check all of Lucy's notes because you didn't trust her."
"That was simply being cautious, is all. Proactive."
"It was adorable and sweet and I loved every minute of you worrying over us. But I'm just saying."
I slip my arm easily around her waist as we head downstairs in the elevator, nuzzling her temple a little.
"I won't make you drink the green sludge though."
The door dings open and her laugh rings out in the small space as we exit and head toward the locker room.
"God, those smoothies really were awful. I am so sorry about that."
"Uh huh."
She flashes me a grin over her shoulder, dimples on full display, and I'm momentarily dazzled before her words make me erupt in laughter.
"I blame Mark."
Arizona
"What is up with you today?"
I look up as Karev and I exit a patient room on the peds floor, frowning a bit as I tap in a note on the chart.
"What do you mean?"
"You're all bubbly and bouncy and stuff. But more than normal," he loops his stethoscope back around his neck, "you get laid this morning or something?"
Thinking back briefly to this morning before we woke Sofia up for kindergarten, I smirk a little at the younger man.
"Well, yes. But that happens most mornings, so that's nothing new."
I watch his eyes widen briefly before he mutters something about wishing he was a lesbian, and I grin to myself, pulling up the file for our next patient check-in.
"I'm having a good day, that's all. It's called being in a good mood, Alex - try it sometime."
I shoot him a mega-watt smile and push open the door to Tyler McLean's room - a kid we had to perform an emergency open-appendectomy on yesterday evening. Alex just shakes his head, trying to contain his smile as he follows me in.
"Hey, Tyler!" I greet the small seven -year-old in the bed as he looks up, "how's that belly feeling today?"
"It hurts."
His adorable blue eyes look up at me, and he pouts slightly, laying back into his pillow as I approach the side of his bed.
"But I bet not as much as it hurt yesterday, right? Now you've just got this big old cut that needs to heal."
As gently as I can, I lean over the bed and shift the blanket and his hospital gown, exposing the small wound on his side from the surgery.
"I'm just going to take a look at your stitches, okay?"
"Okay."
He peers down, watching as I carefully and gently feel over his abdomen - noting there's no reaction to pain anymore from within. I lean over further to check his stitches and everything looks perfect - no swelling, hardly any redness, no sign of infection.
"Looks pretty good, slugger. I think you'll be ready for baseball camp this summer."
At that the small boy perks right up, eyes widening and a dimpled grin appearing on his face, all traces of his previous pout disappearing.
"Yeah? I can't wait for baseball camp! I'm gonna get so good."
"Yeah well, when you get so good that you're a big, famous baseball star, you better come back and sign something for me," I wink at him, smoothing my hand over his unruly blonde hair, "deal?"
He beams and nods.
"Deal."
I pull the covers back up over the boy and smile at his mother, who hovered a little anxiously in the corner while I examined her son.
"Dr. Robbins-Torres, how long do you think Tyler will have to stay in the hospital?"
"Not long at all, provided he keeps healing as well as he is," I move around the bed to speak reassuringly, "I expect we'll be able to discharge him tomorrow afternoon, and he'll just need to be mostly on bed rest at home for the next week or two."
The younger woman looks relieved, and she nods in reply.
"Thank you, doctor."
I grab the tablet from Alex on our way out and add a note to Tyler's chart, turning down the hall to head back to the nurses' station. It's just about time for a lunch break, and if I'm lucky, maybe even time to leave early for the day and go catch up with Callie and whatever she's up to on her day off.
"Dude, you're totally knocked up, aren't you?"
Alex's words stop me in my tracks, and I spin to face him just around the corner, eyes shooting up to his face in surprise.
"What? What are you talking about? I'm not...where did you get that idea?"
He glances me over and raises an eyebrow, pointing his pen toward my chest.
"I thought something was a little different about you, but you bent over that kid's bed in there and," he waves his pen toward the neckline of the shirt I'm wearing, "your boobs are definitely bigger."
Jaw dropping a little, I'm about to be offended when the younger man cuts me off.
"Calm down. Yes, I look. Not as much as I used to, sure - you're like my best friend now. But they're still great boobs."
I tug at the collar of my lab coat a little, pulling it shut a little more.
"It's just this shirt, that's all. And stop looking at my chest."
"And you were even weepier than normal when that baby's parents sent you flowers a few weeks ago - and!" he points triumphantly, "you didn't have a single drink last Friday at Jo's birthday. You never pass on a glass of wine. I thought maybe you were on-call or something but now it all adds up. Torres totally knocked you up, didn't she?"
Smiling politely and somewhat awkwardly at a couple interns who pass by and glance our way, I wait until they're out of earshot before smacking Alex on the upper arm.
"What are you, a detective all of a sudden? Okay..yes. Yes, Alex," I lower my voice a little, but can't help the smile that's tugging at my lips, "I'm pregnant. But nobody except Callie knows yet, so keep it to yourself."
His expression changes completely in the span of a second.
"Dude, I was just trying to mess with you. Are you serious?"
A laugh bubbles up from somewhere inside me at the stunned look on the other doctor's face.
"Fourteen weeks yesterday," I smile softly, "we had our first ultrasound this morning."
Alex grins, glancing down at my cleavage and being intentionally obvious about it. I swat him again, but laugh at the mischief in his eyes.
"Well congrats. I didn't even know you guys were thinking about more kids."
I start walking again and he falls into step beside me, heading toward the desk.
"Like I said, we haven't told anyone we were even trying. It's something we've both wanted for awhile though."
"Does this mean I'm gonna get to be head of the department again when you take mat leave?"
Rolling my eyes a little at the eagerness in my protégé's voice, I set my tablet in the charging dock and laugh as I turn to face him.
"Most likely. Who else would I trust?"
"Annnnd everyone wins."
I shake my head at him, an amused smile on my face, but he nudges his shoulder against mine gently, his voice softer when he speaks.
"Seriously though, I'm happy for you guys."
"So Alex knows about the baby."
I wrap my arms around Callie from behind as she stands at the counter waiting for the kettle to boil, and lean my chin on the taller woman's shoulder.
"Wait, you told him?"
"He guessed actually."
She turns her head a little and gives me a questioning look.
"I know," I laugh, "he's like the great mouse detective. Apparently he stares at my breasts and they gave me away. And I just couldn't deny it after he asked."
My wife turns in my arms, eyes narrowing a bit as she glances down at my cleavage.
"They're not that much bigger yet. Karev is looking a little too closely at my wife's chest."
"Don't worry, I hit him for it. Twice."
I tilt my head up and the brunette captures my lips softly, sliding her arms around my waist. The kettle clicks off a moment later, but she only sighs contently, pulling me closer and deepening the kiss, the velvety softness of her tongue tracing the contours of mine for several minutes.
"Mm," sighing softly as she pulls back, I can't stop my fingers from trailing through her silky hair, "do you think we should tell Sofia she's going to be a big sister?"
A bright smile takes over Callie's face at the thought.
"I think we should. She's going to love it."
"I'm not entirely sure about that..." I laugh a little nervously, "she's been an only child for nearly five years, Callie. A very doted on only child. We should be prepared for her to be a little hesitant about the idea."
"Tim adored you though; you were inseparable."
"I was also only two years younger than him - he didn't remember a time when I wasn't around. I mean, I hope our kids end up with that kind of relationship too, but it might take her some getting used to is all."
The brunette sighs softly, leaning back on the counter with her arms still linked around me.
"I guess you're right, she's used to having us all to herself. Aria and I had six years between us and she couldn't stand me growing up - we were never friends until we were adults."
I brush my fingers through her hair again, fingering the soft strands as she speaks.
"Is it wrong that I just wish we could go back in time a few years? That we were having this baby two or three years ago?"
"It's not wrong," I reply softly, "I wish that too. And if I hadn't gotten on a plane to Boise three years ago we probably would have."
Her eyes flicker to mine with a bit of surprise, but I just shrug a little.
"I'd been thinking about it. Sofia was about to turn two, and I knew I wanted another baby with you. But then..." I trail off a bit, "I never had a chance to bring it up. The Nick thing happened, and then the plane happened and..."
"Hey."
She speaks softly now, the warm skin of her palm sliding across my jaw.
"No regretting, and no dwelling on the past, remember? We promised that to each other. So let's stop this, and just think about the fact that we are doing it - we're doing it now."
A smile tugs at my lips.
"There was a heartbeat," she continues, sounding every bit as awed as she did this morning, "there's a baby...our baby."
Her eyes drop down between us, and she slides her hand down over the faint swell of my stomach, caressing it almost reverently.
"We're going to have two kids, Callie, " I can't help chuckle softly, "remember how terrified we were to even have one?"
"No no - I was terrified, Mark was terrified, but you were pretty much calm and collected the whole time. You were a natural."
"Yeah, why don't you ask Teddy about that? I'm pretty sure that poor girl bore the brunt of my freak-outs over parenting that first year."
Callie lets out a laugh, curling her hands around my waist again.
"Well, freak-outs or not, you were still a natural. I can't wait to see you do it again."
I just grin at the beauty in front of me, leaning in again for a soft kiss on the lips.
"Come on, let's go tell kid number one she's about to have some company."
777*
"Mommmma, I was colouring."
"You can go back to your colouring in a minute, sweetie, I promise. Mom and I just have something we want to talk to you about. It's pretty exciting."
The little girl's pout at being beckoned away from her papers and crayons on the floor is replaced with a look of curiosity as she climbs onto the end of the couch across from Callie and I.
"Are we going to visit grandma and grandpa?"
"Nope."
"Are we going to the zoo?!"
"We just went to the zoo two weeks ago," Callie laughs softly, "so nope, not it."
Her small features take on a look of contemplation as she considers other options for exciting news, and I reach over and smooth my hand over her loose, dark hair. I really have no idea how we're supposed to introduce the idea of a new sibling to our four-year-old - I've spent a lot of time thinking about it, but I'm finding it really hard to judge how she's going to react.
"Our surprise isn't about going anywhere, Sof, but..." I glance at Callie, "it's about something that's going to change in our family soon."
The little girl looks between the two of us, and at once her little brow creases in worry, small fingers twisting the hem of her top.
"Is momma going to live with Uncle Alex again?"
I see Callie's expression immediately shift, and she's quick to respond.
"No, baby - I promise. Momma isn't going anywhere. She's here for good, okay?"
"Okay."
Relieved, she nods her head and watches us expectantly again.
"You know how Zola has a little brother, Bailey? And her mom is having another baby soon?" I start again, smiling as she watches me, "well, Mom and I thought you might like a little brother or sister too."
Sofia's eyes widen quickly.
"Bailey is coming to live here?! He steals all the red crayons!"
I glance back and grin at my wife, who I can tell is barely holding back a laugh.
"Not quite, baby...Bailey is staying with his family."
"But," Callie continues, grinning at the little girl, "you're going to have your very own little brother or sister. Momma is having a baby."
I hold my breath slightly as I watch our daughter quickly process this information, her dark eyes widening in surprise.
"But you don't look like Mer-dith does!" she scoots over closer on the couch, peering at me, "she has the baby in her belly."
She actually seems okay with the news, so I let out a slight sigh of relief and smile, resting my hand low on my stomach as I talk to her.
"I have a baby in my belly too. It's just very, very small right now. Our baby still has to grow for six months."
Her small hand lands on my stomach, and I move mine out of the way for her, watching as she curiously and gently pats at me.
"It doesn't feel like anyone is in there."
I hear Callie laugh softly beside me, and she leans down closer to Sofia's level.
"It will very soon. Right now the baby is only about this big," she holds out her fingers in a span the size of a lemon, "but it's growing every day, and you'll see momma's belly grow too."
"Why do you want another baby? Why did you get it?"
"We...uh...well..."
Callie looks at me, a little lost for an answer, but luckily I manage to pick up for her with relative ease.
"Because mom and I love you so much, Sofia - so, so much - we have so much love to give we wanted to share it with another baby. And we knew that you'd be a really great big sister."
"How did you put it inside?"
"Sof that's not really-"
"Well," I cut Callie off, raising my eyebrow slightly at her, "sweetie - when two grownups love each other as much as mom and I do, they can make babies together."
"But how?"
"Um, well..."
This had all been going so well. I had not intended to have the sex talk with our daughter today, however.
"You see," I think quickly, seeing my wife glance a little helplessly at me, "usually it takes a woman and a man to make a baby. They each have part inside of them, and when they put those parts together a baby will grow."
I am a double board-certified paediatric and fetal surgeon, and 'parts' is the most appropriate explanation I can come up with on the spot. I groan a little internally, but I know I have to continue now because our curious, precocious little girl is looking at me expectantly.
"But...when two mommies love each other and want to make a baby, a doctor can help them get the second part inside too."
She contemplates this for a moment, looking down at my stomach again. But she's grown up around enough doctors and spent enough time at the hospital that the explanation doesn't even seem to phase her.
"Did it hurt?"
Smiling, I smooth her hair back again and reassure her.
"Not at all."
"It's gonna be in there for six whole months? That's a long time, momma."
I grin at her again, unable to help myself at the slight exasperated tone in her voice.
"The time will go quickly though and the baby will be here before you know it. That's why we wanted to tell you now."
"Can you make sure it's a girl baby? I would like a sister, I think."
"Well," Callie starts again, "we don't get to choose, sweetie. It will be a surprise whether it's a girl or a boy baby. But you'd love a little brother just as much as a sister, right?"
The young brunette contemplates this for a few minutes too, her brow furrowed in concentration in a way that is so like Callie, but eventually a smile comes over her face as she looks up at us and replies.
"Yeah. That would be okay. I would still share my toys."
I feel Callie's arm wrap around my shoulders and I lean back into her a bit, happy at how smoothly this went and how easily our daughter seemed to understand, at least for now.
"Do you have any questions, Sof?"
"Nope."
She shifts on the couch, leaning down towards my lap, and her little fingers tug my shirt up just a little so she can peer underneath. In a simple, innocent motion that has my heart swelling with love, she leans in and gently kisses my stomach.
"See you soon, baby."
She sits up again, but then pauses and leans back down, tugging my top up once more as she speaks to my belly, her breath warm against my skin.
"Try to be a girl, okay?"
