Hello, my wonderful and merciful readers,

Ok, I'll just skip the begging and just put my head on a plate. Here you go, one author's head, served with long waiting months and furious chapter checkings.

Can I amend myself by saying that I'm sorry. And that life's just been getting in the way of the greater good (writing fanfic). Several readers have been PMing me, freaking out that the story is going to an end. Well, don't worry my dears, I still several months to go before this author is going anywhere. I have been sitting in my room, racking my brains out to add more angst to the story.

Those of you who thinks that we have reached the conclusion of the story, and that the angst was over, think again. Because we haven't even reached the climax yet.

Before you read this chapter, and tear my head out, hear me out. Bella doesn't know that Edward knew about Renee's forbidding them to be together (remember, he was eavesdropping). So, naturally, she didn't tell him that Renee has given her the green light. Edward, knowing of Renee's forbidding, but not her green lights, what would he do?

Just keep that in mind as you read this tearful chapter.

And remember, this story does have a happy ending.


Chapter 29- Glaciers

If only she knew then how it would turn out, she'd never say anything to him.

She just couldn't believe.

With the date of the play looming closer and closer, Bella had spent all her time practicing. Whether it was whispering the lines or acting out movements, her life seemed to revolve only around the play.

May 25th was the official date for their play.

The board of judges has been announced. The Departmental Chair, a representative spokesperson from Summa Entertainment, a renowned executive director, a Broadway critic, a respected actress, and Edward Cullen would all be the judges.

Bella was worried out of her mind. But she wasn't the worst of them all.

Nowadays, it took Jasper all his strength just to calm Alice. And Emmett has given up on even talking reasonably with Rosalie.

The prize has been named. The winning team would have a position at several film productions by Summa Entertainment. It was Summa Entertainment's way of recruiting new talents. The winning team would have a chance a working with the most famous director in the industry, Giovanni Galianni. To be working with him was to be on their way to Hollywood.

In short, the winning team would have it all.

Even Lauren Mallory put efforts into this. For the first time, Bella had a taste of competition, of viciousness. Never in her life has she wanted something so badly. Bella's never been a person who thrived on failures of somebody else. She was never the kind of person that, for the sake of her own happiness, wants someone else to fail so she would have a chance.

But she was realizing, little by little, this dog-eat-dog industry. She was finally realizing that in order to secure her own success, others must fall. This was a road where, in order to walk, she must step on everybody else.

She was terrified when she found herself wishing that Angela's group would fail the project. She was so angry of herself to hope that Angela's play would not be as good as hers.

It was no wonder to her now why someone as talented as Edward had no desire to be in this kind of business. Given his nature, he'd probably spend a great deal of time loathing himself for feeling so vicious. Bella knew she did.

Edward.

Even in this whirlwind of preparation, this chaos of wanting and wishing, there was still room for Edward in her mind. The knowledge of Renee's approval nagged in her head. There were several nights when, after her mind's put the play aside, she would just lie down on her bed and drift her thought to Edward.

It was easy, at first, to think about how she would tell Edward her feelings.

But then the doubts started to enter her mind.

Did Edward feel the same way about her? How would she know if it was just her mind playing with her?

Maybe she wanted so much that her mind deluded her into conjuring up the idea that he wanted her too.

She spent many nights debating over this. She wanted to tell him. She wanted him to know that, for quite a while now, her heart and attention have belonged to him.

She thought that she was tired of pretending. She thought that she needed to tell him her feelings, or else her heart would burst. She thought that she must tell him, no matter how he would react to it.

She was kidding herself.

What she wanted most wasn't to tell him.

What she wanted most was for him to feel the same way.

Sometimes she thought he did. Then sometimes she thought he didn't.

But it would be so simple if only feelings were involved. If it was just that, then she wouldn't have as many headaches as she did.

Because she knew, no matter how much her romantic heart contradicted this, that their feelings and love weren't the only thing on the line.

She hated that Renee was right. Their social standing, especially Edward's, would be endangered. Following their hearts meant that they would have to give up their lives now. And if all was to go wrong, Edward's job, his position at the university might not be secured.

All of that was in Bella's mind that evening of March 18th as she prepared for her dinner. She was going the lines of the play over her head, at the same time trying to stir that damned tomato sauce into perfection.

When the sauce was as good as possibly could be, Bella tried to reach for the bowl sitting on the top cabinet. When did that cabinet become so high?

"Here, let me get that for you."

Bella didn't need to turn around to know whose velvety voice that was. She could feel her body physically reacting to his voice. Her heart beat faster; her body grew hotter as she felt his presence behind her, towering to reach for that bowl. The proximity of their bodies made her breathing grow heavy. She could feel the heat, the warmth of his body next to her.

"Here you go," Edward said, setting the ornate bowl on the counter.

Bella turned to face him. So close were their bodies that her eyes were at the level of his neck. She could smell the spicy, dangerous cinnamon of his scents. At this angle, she could see the slight scar on his chin.

"Bella?" Edward's voice sounded far away as he regarded her.

Something was happening in her. Suddenly, the world stilled.

This was it. This was the moment.

Her body acted on its own accord. Her mind barely register the fact that she was going to tell him her feelings now when her hands reached his face and pulled it towards hers.

Oh, screw society and its rigid rules.

The moment her lips touched his, everything was right again. All the worries, the heartaches were soothed. His lips were soft of silk.

He didn't react for a moment. For a moment he was shocked.

Then, without the consent of his mind, his body reacted to her.

She found his hands encircled her waist. His lips began to move against hers in a gentle, conflicting manner at first, but gradually turned urgent. He captured her lower lip between his. Her hands found their ways around his neck, toward his luscious hair. She clung to him, refusing to let him go. He tightened his grip on her, so tight that she thought all the air would leave her lungs.

It was a kiss of a lifetime. The yearning in her swelled until it was white hot.

Edward broke the kiss for much needed oxygen.

With a grunt, Edward picked Bella up and set her sitting on the counter. His hands reached behind her back and tangled in the mess of her hair. His tongue sought hers, and she readily gave in to him. Oh, the taste of him, of his dominance. His tongue stroked hers, gentle strokes that burned her mouth, burned her body. His mouth didn't leave her when she needed breaths; they moved down her neck in small licks.

She decided that it was time. There was no way he could kiss her like that if he didn't love her.

There was no way he could fake that kind of passion.

It was time.

"Edward," she moaned his name, "Edward, I love you."

The moment the words left her lips, he froze.

Then he pulled away, his face full of horror.

"What?" His voice was far away. Why was he reacting this way? Wasn't he supposed to be joyful?

"You don't love me, Bella." Edward said, sighing and turning away from her face. The look on his face was now calculating. And sort of painful.

She hopped down from the counter, and somehow she felt like the ground was crumbling under her feet. "Yes, I do love you."

"No you don't love me. You just have a crush on me, Bella."

"I know what I feel. I love you. Don't you love me too?" Bella didn't like the sound of her voice, small and desperate.

"Love you?" Edward asked. Slowly, hesitantly, the calculating eyes turned into a smirk.

She didn't like the look on his face at all. "But I thought... I thought…that you love me." she stammered.

A cold laugh left his perfect lips, so cold that it chilled Bella to the bones. "Love you? Love you? You're just a child, Bella." He said, the emeralds of his eyes were glaciers.

"But you k-kissed me…" Bella reasoned with him. That was right. If he didn't love her, then when did he kiss her so tenderly? Why did he care for her so much? All the evident were there. The meaningful gift he gave her for Christmas, the glances he gave her when nobody was looking, that life-shattering New Year's kiss. Every smile, every gesture was for her.

What she dreaded most was happening. Annoyance flashed in his glacial eyes. "Bella, I'm a man. My beautiful girlfriend is away. I have needs. You're sort of cute, and you were willing. Like any other red-blooded man, I'd kiss you." He smirked, but his eyes were now hateful. "But there is no way I'm in love with you. No. Way."

Alice was wrong. He didn't love her. How could he? She was nothing special. And here she was, daring to hope.

"I don't believe you." Her defense sounded weak.

"Well, believe it." The hatred in his eyes shattered her heart. "You know what? I don't even like you that much."

The disgust in his voice was too much to handle. Grabbing her keys on the counter, she ran for the door, ran away from the cold eyes and hateful expression.

She couldn't see the pain in his eyes the moment she turned away.

Away from him.


Those who really don't like me right now, I understand you. You have every right to.

Those who have no idea why Bella didn't just tell Edward that Renee has given her the green light, read the authour note above. It explains.

Just remember, there's a happy ending.