Tato Potato, being ill can make you do the strangest things, though you probably wouldn't have left the front door open if it hadn't been safe. I'm glad your dog's okay! Ethan, on the other hand, isn't very okay. Thank you for your review.
ETWentHome, Ethan's lucky it happened in this story, which is mostly comedy, rather in one of the more serious ones, or Sophie would never have forgiven him! Can you imagine Cal resisting the opportunity to tease Ethan? Thank you for your review.
Tanith Panic, thank you for your review. I'm so glad you like Sophie and Ethan. I hope they're not quite nauseatingly in love! Lily is definitely not perfect - none of the doctors are and that's something I really love about Casualty.
EDSidekick, thank you for your review. Ethan definitely isn't the sort to cheat, though he's also not usually the sort to tell lies and lock himself out! Sophie does have a very wild imagination and she needs to calm it down before she graduates!
"I was so sure she was a time-waster," said Lily sadly.
Cal put his arm around her. "I know. Sometimes all you've got to rely on are your own instincts and the patient's previous medical history. That means you can't get it right every time. There have been loads of times when I've been sure when I've been wrong. Ask Ethan! But it does feel horrible."
Lily's eyes filled with tears. "Do you think she'll be okay?"
Cal stroked her shoulder. "You know I can't answer that. On the positive side, she is young and healthy."
Lily wiped a tear. "Not very healthy."
"True," sighed Cal. He watched in anguish as Lily's tears began to fall. "Lily, don't cry! It's not your fault. It's an easy mistake to make."
"Of course it's my fault," said Lily through her tears. "I should have spotted it. But I didn't even examine her!"
Cal felt further dismay but tried not to show it. Lily knew she'd made a mistake and there's absolutely nothing to be gained by confirming it. "We can't always take the time to examine every patient."
Lily was sobbing. It was one of the saddest things Cal had ever seen.
"Hey, come here," he said softly, holding out his arms. He was expecting Lily to resist, but she didn't. She put her arms around Cal and cried into his shoulder.
"I should have seen the signs," wept Lily.
"The signs aren't always visible," said Cal. "I've missed them before. I'm sure every doctor has."
"I feel like it's all my fault."
"It's not your fault, beautiful," said Cal. He stroked her hair. "It happens, but you'll learn from this and do things differently next time."
"But what if she dies?" wailed Lily.
"It won't be your fault," said Cal. "You couldn't find anything wrong with her yesterday so there was nothing you could do, but you didn't scare her off. She still felt able to come in again today – and that meant she collapsed here, rather than at home, where she might not have been discovered for days. The only thing that really matters is that she was able to get the treatment she needed and the fact she was at the hospital today meant she was treated promptly."
"But if I'd made the correct diagnosis yesterday…" said Lily.
Cal stroked her hair. "Then there would have been only so much you could have done for her. You could have referred her to the stroke department, but there would probably have been a bit of a wait for an appointment. Again, she could easily have collapsed at home. If it had to happen, it couldn't have happened in a better place."
"I still made a mistake, though," said Lily.
"Everyone makes mistakes," said Cal. "I'll go through the list of my mistakes if it'll you feel any better, but it's going to take a very long time."
Lily laughed shakily and wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry for being such a baby."
"Hey, don't be sorry. I'm always here if you need to cry."
Lily sniffed. "And I'm always here if you need to cry."
"I know you are," said Cal. "Don't worry, okay?" He kissed her forehead.
Lily felt herself freeze in his arms. Their eyes met for a long moment. Lily felt her heart-rate speed up and reminded herself that even if Cal did like her, he wouldn't like her for long.
But she wanted his kisses. She wanted to feel his lips on hers. She already knew that she'd like it.
Cal started to move his head towards hers. Closer and closer…
When Cal got a text, the sound seemed to recall them both to their senses. They looked at each other, laughed, and awkwardly let go of each other. Cal read the text. "Hey, you'll never guess what! This will put a smile on your face. Ethan's locked himself out!"
"What was Ethan doing out?" said Lily.
"I don't know, but he's locked out now," said Cal. "He wants me to go and let him in. So I suppose I'd better."
Lily looked away. "I… I suppose I should go and face Mrs Beauchamp."
"Well, you could hide from her instead," said Cal. "That's what I usually do. But it doesn't seem to make her calm down: if anything, it makes her even more annoyed." He smiled at her. "But I know loads of good hiding places."
Lily smiled. "Thank you, Cal. But I think it's better to face these things."
"I'll tell you what," said Cal. "I'll walk you as far as her office. And I'll have a coffee waiting for you if you survive the experience. How does that sound?"
"What about Ethan?" said Lily.
Cal looked as though he'd forgotten Ethan. "Oh… well… I'll go and find Robyn and give her my keys. I'm sure she won't mind going – and she won't tease Ethan nearly as much as I would!"
Ethan rested his head against Sophie's shoulder. Then he sat up again. "Sorry. You really shouldn't be too close to me."
"It's impossible to be too close to you, Ethan," said Sophie.
Ethan coughed and put his head on Sophie's shoulder again.
"I definitely can't see you getting to the opera," said Sophie.
"No, I'll be fine by this evening," said Ethan. "My symptoms are just worse because I'm late taking my medication." His phone rang and he looked at it, sighing. "It's Caleb. Probably wants to gloat."
He answered the phone and immediately heard Cal's anxious voice. "What the hell are you doing out of bed?"
"Long story," croaked Ethan.
"Okay," said Cal. "You can tell me later. I'm just letting you know I can't bring your keys. I'm sorry. Lily and I are going to see Mrs Beauchamp."
Ethan heard Lily's voice in the background, though he couldn't make the words. He politely waited until she'd finished speaking. "Caleb, what am I supposed to do: sit out on the stairs all day? In the cold?"
"No, of course not. I'll get someone else to bring the keys," said Cal. "Robyn or maybe Lofty. Don't worry, Nibbles. Someone will be with you very soon."
This time Lily's voice was clear. "He doesn't like being called Nibbles!"
"Well, he called me Caleb," said Cal.
Lily gently closed Connie's door behind her and wiped her eyes. Cal felt something inside him clench. He always felt sad when Ethan or Sophie cried, but he hadn't expected to feel that way about Lily.
"Hey," said Cal softly. He wanted to give her a hug, but he was holding two coffees and he didn't think he could manage both with one hand, especially as there was a risk of spilling scalding hot liquid on Lily. He didn't want to do anything that could endanger Lily – which, he told himself, was a perfectly natural thing to think about a colleague. "Was it really awful?"
"It could have been a lot worse," admitted Lily.
Cal handed her one of the coffees and touched her arm gently. "But the emotion still gets to you sometimes, doesn't it?"
"Yes, it does," agreed Lily.
Cal gave her a quick hug with his free arm. "How about we take these outside?"
Lily nodded and they found a bench where they could sit quietly.
Cal reached into his pocket. "I got you this too." It was a Mars bar. "I don't know if you like them, but they usually cheer me up."
"Thank you," said Lily. She seemed touched. "That was thoughtful. I try not to eat them too often, but perhaps I need one today."
"You won't need to eat them too often," said Cal. "It's not often Lily Chao makes a mistake. We'd better not tell Robyn or it will be all over the ED. Dr Chao makes a mistake… everyone will be running outside to see if they can see any pigs flying."
Lily laughed shakily. "I've never met a guy who makes me laugh as much as you do, Cal." She paused. "Actually, I don't think I've met another guy who makes me laugh."
Cal found this hilarious and decided to tell Ethan later, if he wasn't feeling too ill. Ethan always thought he was the funny brother – that should show him!
They were smiling at each other when Robyn called to them and they saw her walking towards the ED. "Hey, guys. Ethan and Sophie are back in the flat now. Ethan's really not well, is he? I had to help Sophie to get him into bed. He was so floppy."
Cal choked on his coffee. "I should think Sophie needs help with that even when he isn't ill!"
Lily banged him on the back a bit harder than she needed to. "Caleb Knight, that is not funny."
"Isn't it?" said Cal, pouting.
"No," said Lily. "But that stupid look on your face is very funny. Isn't it, Robyn?"
"Yes, it is," agreed Robyn, laughing.
Even though he was the subject of their mirth, Cal couldn't help thinking how good it was to see Lily happy.
