Chapter Twenty-Nine: "Brawling in public can be considered an offense."


Sanae absently walked through the markets, inspecting what they had on offer. She'd been through the shopping district on this island just an hour earlier, but that was for food supplies. Now she was shopping for herself.

The Straw Hats had all gone off shopping, after strict warnings from Namizo that the island was home to a navy base and they were not to make any trouble. The navigator had then been generous enough to give them all an allowance to make their purchases – and of course the rest of the crew (with the exception of the splendid Roben) were ungracious cretins to complain about the amount sweet Namizo had deemed acceptable.

Sanae fingered a couple of cooking utensils thoughtfully, but decided against them. They looked fancy, but on closer inspection were clearly bad quality. They couldn't handle any of the more exotic dishes the Merry saw, like Sea King or maybe dinosaur again.

The blonde cook moved past a couple of stalls before curiously pausing at one selling shoes. She picked up a pair of high-heeled boots on display and looked at them.

"You have a good eye," the woman behind the counter told her. "Those would look great on you."

The cook was fairly picky about her footwear. It wasn't necessarily a fashion choice – although she did take pride in her appearance – it was a practical choice. After all, her fighting style was pretty much solely comprised of using her feet. It was too easy to injure herself wearing floppy, strappy shoes.

The boots didn't look floppy, though. They went halfway up the shin, and had a four-inch heel. By the feel of it, they were pliable enough that she wouldn't stub her toes into the tips with every kick, but still sturdy enough that the full impact would be just as filtered as her normal dress shoes.

"Can I try these on to decide?" Sanae asked the shopkeeper.

"Oh, of course," the woman hurriedly agreed.

Sanae swapped her shoes and inspected the new pair thoughtfully. They actually looked pretty good on her, and the black matched her style. Plus, she'd been meaning to get a new pair of dressier shoes for a while now, ever since she'd started wearing through the sole of her last pair.

She'd only rarely had an occasion to walk in high-heels before, but she had excellent balance. It only took a few steps before she'd gotten the hang of it.

"They look absolutely stunning on you," the shopkeeper told her.

"Yeah, I guess." Sanae bent her foot to the side slightly, and then decided. "How much are they?"

It took a couple of minutes of haggling, but it wasn't long before Sanae continued walking through the street, her old shoes in her hand to give her new ones a chance to break in.

The markets started to grow more sparse as she walked, getting closer to the edge of town, the road getting wider. Sanae rounded a corner and stopped dead at the sight of marine flags in the distance.

Shrugging, Sanae turned to go back. There was no reason to keep going if the marine base was that way, and the lovely Namizo had warned the crew not to get too close.

…Which apparently the moss-headed swordsman was having difficulty with.

Sanae stopped and glared as she recognised the girl leaving the bar just up the street, her three swords clinking together as she wiped her mouth with her hand.

"What are you doing?"

Sora's smile dripped off her face at the familiar voice. She looked around to see Sanae watching her, irritated about some stupid reason or another. "I was getting a drink. What does it look like?"

"If you want to destroy your liver, I'm sure you could manage that a little further from the marine base," Sanae told her, pointing at the navy building.

Sora glanced over her shoulder and then raised an eyebrow at the cook. "What, has the fact you've only got one eye screwed up your depth perception? It's miles away."

"Just because you would make twenty wrong turns going down the street, doesn't mean that the marines couldn't get here the direct way," Sanae countered.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sora snapped.

"It means that you're a dumbass who let her guard down in easy distance of a military base! You've already been arrested once this week, remember?"

"Getting a drink isn't the same thing as letting my guard down," Sora growled, her fingers clenching around a sword. "And just because you would be beaten the moment they noticed you, doesn't mean that I'm that weak."

"What did you just say?"

"You heard me!"

"That's it!" Sanae snapped, dropping her old shoes on the ground. She lunged forwards, her new boots flying towards the swordsman.

Sora's swords were up and ready in a moment, blocking the kick.

"Oi, you two!"

"What?!" both Straw Hats snapped at the same time, turning to glare at the man who interrupted them with Sanae's foot still pressing against Sora's sword.

The man who'd interrupted was glaring at them in a no-nonsense manner under his military cap, his arms folded. The rest of the navy patrol stood behind him.

All in all, there were a total of twelve marines, every one of them watching them suspiciously.

Sanae gave Sora an 'I told you so' glare. Sora's upper lip curled.

"You two had better consider your actions," the marine told them, glaring at the two girls. "Brawling in public can be considered an offense. If you must fight, take it somewhere else."

Slowly, Sanae brought her leg down. Sora resheathed her swords, glaring at the marines all the while.

"Well, we certainly wouldn't want to break any laws," Sanae said flatly. She gave a sharp look at Sora, and then started to walk off.

"Wait a minute!" one of the marines barked.

Sanae paused and glanced over her shoulder. "What?"

The marine who had talked looked at superior officer leading the patrol, pointing at Sora. "That one has three swords, sir."

Sora glanced at her hip and raised an eyebrow. "Well done. I'm glad to see that marine training allows you to count to three."

"Are you Roronoa Zoro?" the superior officer asked abruptly.

Considering that question for a moment, Sora shrugged. "That depends on who you ask," she answered honestly.

"Answer the question," another marine snapped, folding her arms. "Are you or are you not the pirate on Straw Hat's crew? The one with a sixty million berry bounty?"

Absently, Sora wondered what it was the marines were looking so confused about. Did they doubt that a girl could be a good swordsman, or were they just surprised that 'Roronoa Zoro' was in fact a girl? (Although they probably would have heard the rumours – Sora could see no logical reason Navarone wold have kept quiet about the matter.)

Somewhat to her surprise, she realised she didn't care as much anymore if people thought her pronouns had any effect on her swordsmanship. It still bothered her, but not to the same extent it would have once.

"Yeah. I am. So?"

Sanae groaned. "Oh, admit to being a pirate – that's a good idea, moss-head."

Sora smirked. "You're just jealous because they've heard of me while you're a complete unknown."

"Me, jealous of you?!"

The marine interrupted, glancing between the two arguing Straw Hats. "Am I to understand both of you are pirates?"

Sanae briefly considered trying to bluff her way out. But even if the moss-head wouldn't give her away, she had no intention of trying to skulk away from the fight that Sora was clearly about to get into. Sanae let her lips twitch upwards in a smirk. "And what if we are?"

In a moment a dozen guns were pointed at them.

Pulling out one of her cigarettes from her pocket, Sanae glanced around. Sometime during the conversation the marines had spread out in a circle around the two girls, cutting off any chance of them running.

"Surrender peacefully," the superior marine ordered. "We have you surrounded."

Sanae snorted in laughter, lighting her cigarette. The marines exchanged nervous glances.

Sora let her face break out into a grin. "Surrounded, huh?" the swordsman repeated, amused. Her fingers brushed against her three swords. "You really think that'll help?"

"FIRE!"

The two pirates didn't even glance at each other. Despite their differences, they'd been in enough battles together to know how the other worked. And both knew they didn't need to interfere in the other's fight – they could take care of themselves.

Sora ran for the pirates on the right of the circle, putting her sword into her mouth as she did so. Effortlessly she dodged to the side of the bullets, reaching the marines without so much as breaking step.

In the meantime, Sanae sprinted for the marines on the left, avoiding the gunshots with practised ease. The moment she judged herself within range, she dug her right boot into the ground, using it as a base as she spun her left foot around to collide with a marine's chest.

It wasn't the fanciest manoeuvre she knew. In truth, it was one of her most basic kicks, one she'd done a thousand times before.

But this was the first time she'd ever kicked hard with high-heels on. It felt like she'd stabbed into a half-baked cake with her foot.

Instead of throwing him, the heel dug deep into the marine's chest, sinking past the skin. The marine's eyes filled with pain and he let out a tortured yell.

Sanae felt her breath stop, but there wasn't a chance to do anything. In the corner of her eye she could see another marine running towards her, her sword out. The pirate spun around, bringing her leg up to defend herself.

She'd kinda assumed that the heel would withdraw when her foot did, leaving her bloodied but free. Much to her surprise, however, the marine was dragged with her.

Her legs were easily strong enough to take the weight. Without pausing to think she held her foot up, the gurgling man attached to her foot.

"She's using Private Bain as a shield!" one of the men shrieked.

"You can have him back," Sanae muttered.

Zeff had mainly taught her to balance on her right foot and kick with the left. However, since that wasn't an option at the moment, Sanae slammed her foot and 'Private Bain' onto the ground. Her left heel still attached to his body, she spun around, kicking out with her right foot and hitting the nearest marine square in the chest.

This time, she hit with the side of her foot to avoid impaling again, only throwing the man away from her. However, the foot still stuck into Bain's chest cracked alarmingly, a nasty snap coming from her ankle.

Sanae suddenly couldn't support her own weight. She dropped to the ground, gasping in pain.

One of the marines seized her chance, hurtling forwards to hit the downed girl. With her uninjured right foot, Sanae kicked upwards as hard as she could. Her foot collided with the woman's chin, throwing her backwards.

Hoping that she'd be safe for a moment, Sanae reached for her foot and tugged experimentally on the shoe. It didn't budge, but her ankle screamed in protest and the unconscious man had a spasm.

The man didn't look good, although he was breathing. Still, even if Sanae had Choppa's knowledge she didn't have time to feel guilt over attacking an enemy. She pulled her body nearer her foot, and frantically started to untie the laces.

Sanae kicked herself free of the shoe. For a second she caught a glimpse of her foot, as red as the crap-geezer's must have been in his day.

Then she expertly dropped into a handstand, spinning around upside down to kick with her uninjured foot on the three marines running for her. The heel grazed shallow cuts into the skin of the attackers, but nothing serious for either sides of the fight.

After a few seconds Sanae flipped around, intending on landing in an upright position. However, the moment she tried agony pierced up from her ankle and she folded, hitting the dirt.

The cook glanced up, trying to judge how many more enemies were there. To her mixed annoyance and relief, there weren't. The rest of the marines were already on the ground, bleeding from newly inflicted and probably non-fatal sword strokes.

Sora sheathed her swords, giving an annoyed look at where Sanae was sitting in the dirt. "You going to stay there all day?"

Sanae glared at her, and tried to get up. She was confident that this time she could ignore the pain long enough to get to her feet.

She was wrong. Her ankle gave out and the cook dropped to the dirt, swearing violently in a most unladylike fashion.

After a few seconds she became aware of Sora watching her. There was a flicker of concern in the swordsman's expression, which only served to infuriate Sanae further. "What?" she snapped.

"Yours?"

"My what, marimo?"

"Blood," Sora elaborated, gesturing to Sanae. "Is it yours?"

"Huh?" Sanae looked down at herself and realised what it must look like. Blood had soaked through her shoes, drenching her foot red with splatters all the way up her legs. To add to the picture, she was clutching one of ankles, clearly unable to walk on it. "No. His." She jerked her thumb at the unconscious Private Bain.

The black boot was still impaled in his chest. It would have been almost comical if it wasn't for the dark patch creeping along the white shirt. Although high-heels weren't really the crap-geezer's style (and Sanae now had a good idea why), the shoe still looked more like it belonged to Zeff than his apprentice.

Much to Sanae's relief, the traces of concern in Sora's eyes vanished. "Then get up, dumbass cook," she said sharply. "The navy'll be crawling over the place in a minute."

Sanae glared at her and moved to push up again, before a violent throb from her ankle stopped her trying. Reluctantly she let herself fall back again. "I can't," she muttered.

"What?"

"I said I can't, alright?" Sanae snapped at her. "I think I broke my ankle," she added sullenly.

The cook took a moment to consider if she preferred the previous concern or the current amusement spreading over Sora's face. On the whole, she decided amusement was better, although it was a close one.

With a shrug, the swordsman walked forwards. Her fingers curled around the back of Sanae's shirt and Sora started to drag her off, ignoring the blonde's startled shout and subsequent curing.

"Put me down; I'll do it myself!"

"You can't even stand," Sora pointed out.

"I'd rather crawl," Sanae grumbled.

Sora didn't falter, her grip still strong around the cook's shirt.

Sanae groaned. "Where are you even taking me to, anyway?"

"The ship," Sora said, as if it should be obvious.

"Oh, for – if you insist on dragging me, at least go in the right direction, moss-head! This is the opposite of back to the ship!"

The two pirates stop dead. Sanae craned her neck to get a look at the girl dragging her, and was pleased to note that her cheeks had coloured.

Sora turned around, forcibly dragging Sanae around in her circle and probably going out of her way to jolt the injury.

Sanae suppressed a gasp and forced her face into a smirk. "You're getting closer," she said in the most-mocking, least-pained voice she could make. "But you're not there yet. Turn a couple more degrees."

Sora hissed a couple of words that were by no means new to Sanae, before successfully walking off in the right direction. Sanae was amused to note how hesitant she was in the first few steps, as if waiting for another correction. When she didn't receive one, they moved off more confidently.

The cook managed to grab her discarded old pair of shoes as she was dragged past where she left them.

They got through town without incident, excluding the stares they got from every direction. A couple of good Samaritans asked if Sanae was okay, seeing the blonde girl coated in blood, to which both pirates roughly said that she was fine.

On the walk, Sora didn't seem to take any apparent care to avoid jolting Sanae's injury, but somehow managed to avoid the worst areas of the road without appearing to do so. Sanae wouldn't have complained either way.

The cook still thought that she could have made it back to the ship alone eventually, but she also had to grudgingly acknowledge the help. Her vague gratitude didn't completely halt her insults, but she tempered her tongue somewhat and tried to give somewhat civil directions whenever it became clear that the swordsman had no idea where she was going.

Being a pirate ship on an island with a marine base, they hadn't docked in the port. Instead, they'd weighed anchor at a deserted beach that had stayed just as uninhabited since they'd last been there.

Sora easily dragged Sanae through the sand, before pausing at the side of the ship. She glanced at the ladder to the deck, and then at the cook.

Before Sanae got a chance to say anything, Sora picked her up and flung her over her shoulder.

"Hey!"

"Stop wiggling or you're going to fall," Sora said vaguely, starting to scale the ladder.

"Good!"

Sora ignored her protests, landing lightly on the deck.

With less care than recommended, but more care than Sanae had expected, Sora pulled the older girl off her shoulder and placed her on the deck.

Sanae rubbed her ankle, glancing away from her crewmate. "…Thanks, moss-head," she grumbled reluctantly.

Sora shrugged wordlessly, acknowledging the thanks. Then the swordsman turned and headed into the ship, leaving Sanae on the deck.

The cook was just beginning to plan how she was going to get into the kitchen when a yelp ran out over the deck.

"Sanae's hurt?!" a familiar reindeer's voice shrieked. Within a moment hoofprints beat onto the deck as Choppa ran out, not waiting for Sora's reply.

"Hey, Choppa," Sanae said in resignation as the doctor skidded to a stop next to her.

Choppa took one look at the bloodied mess that was Sanae's foot, and proceeded to let out a horrified shout. "Somebody call a doctor!"

"It's not really as bad as it looks, that's not my blo-"

"Oh wait! I'm a doctor!" Choppa realised.

"Seriously, it's not my blood. I just hurt my ankle-"

Choppa wasn't listening, already inspecting the injury. Sanae gave up on trying to explain it, trusting that the doctor would realise how bad it was on her own.

Letting her friend take care of her ankle, Sanae reached around to her uninjured foot and began to tug the boot off. The other half of the pair was lost and probably ruined with blood anyway. Besides that, she didn't really think she wanted to wear this style again anytime soon.


I wanted to have at least one adventure that was entirely due to the genderbend (although I do love the various headcannons that Sanji decided he likes high-heels after he learnt to wear them, but I imagine Sanae would try them on much earlier in life. Also, while I'm talking about that comparison, Sanji had better teachers for high-heels. Sanae might have been taught high-heels some years ago, but probably never learnt how to fight in them, and thus had the problem outlined in this chapter).

Second-to-last chapter. Next one will be final.

Let me know what you think!