All characters, etc from Sons of Anarchy belong to Kurt Sutter.
Ashleigh Carter is my own small piece of warped imagination.
Any mistakes are my own. Feel free to point them out but please be nice.
CHAPTER 29:
Gemma saw Happy come storming back into the club house, barely an hour after he'd left, in possibly the vilest mood she'd ever seen. She knew Ashleigh was due back in town today. She decided to go and see what the damage was.
Gemma found Ashleigh still on the kitchen floor, crying soundlessly, staring at scattered carnage.
"What happened baby?" Gemma asked stepping carefully across the kitchen. When Ashleigh didn't answer she sank down to sit next to her and put and arm around her pulling her close.
"Tell me what happened." Gemma said soothingly, stroking Ashleigh's hair with her other hand.
"He wanted me to give up my work. I don't understand why." Ashleigh whispered.
"Because of this?" Gemma ran her hand lightly over the bruise and the bandage.
"Yeah. He left. Oh God Gemma what happened?"
"He's at the club house baby. He's OK. Mad as hell but OK."
"He was so angry. Oh God I hope he's not fucking some crow-eater." She put the back of her hand to her mouth and Gemma felt Ashleigh's body retch at the thought.
"I don't think anyone's goin' near him in that mood honey, never mind what you did to Carrie."
They sat in silence for a while.
"Why would he ask me to do that?" Ashleigh asked quietly.
Gemma sighed. "Sweetheart that man loves you to death. He just doesn't want anyone else to kill you."
Ashleigh looked up at Gemma for the first time. "But this is me, it's what I do. It's my job and I'm good at it. If I give this up because he tells me to, I'm giving up my independence."
"You're just going to have to find a way to work it out with him darlin'. He'll come round. He's just scared for you. He's riding out to the coast with Jax tomorrow. Give him chance to cool off. You can talk when he gets back."
Ashleigh took a deep breath and nodded, wiping her hands over her eyes and down her cheeks. "Any chance you can give me a hand clearing this mess up?" She asked as they both scrambled up.
Ashleigh lay in the lonely bed later that night. Missing him was a physical ache. She was curled in a ball around on of his t-shirts, breathing in his scent and feeling like she was falling into an abyss. She'd been looking forward to getting home. When the job had started going downhill all she could think about was making sure that she made it back to him and their little girl alive.
She understood his concern, but what she did was so much a part of her identity that she didn't think she could just stop. For most of her life people had treated her differently because of what she did, and the way she sometimes did it, but she liked that she was good at it. She liked that she had the ability to take care of herself and her family. Maybe they could come to some sort of compromise. But how far was she prepared to go? How much would she have to give up?
She thought about him drinking at the club house. The thought crossed her mind again that he might try to fuck his anger out of his system and she retched again. If he went running for pussy every time they had a fight there were going to be some serious problems.
Things had been going so well. They were a family. Living together after living separate lives for so long had been surprisingly easy. It felt so wrong now when they were apart. He made her feel like a normal life was possible, that she wasn't a freak to be kept at a distance and treated with extreme caution. She stared into the darkness for a long time, but sleep did not come.
