Author Note:
Greetings my dear readers! I have returned! And once again, it is Uzumaki randomness!
What very few knew, was that the Uzumaki and Uchiha clan had one big, massive, enormous common point, and due to this, rarely fought against each other, instead choosing to become allies to prey on other clans. Just … not the Senju. The Uzumaki would die before attacking a clan that made such delightful ramen. What was that common point? Well ….
Senju Hashirama was a happy man. He had all the reasons to be after all. The Senju and Uchiha were now allies, Konoha was prospering, and his wonderful bride-to-be had arrived just today! Then, his day got even better when he located his best friend.
"Hey Madara!" He exclaimed, waving happily at his friend. The Uchiha clan head turned to him, and raised an eyebrow when his eyes landed on the red-haired woman walking next to him. "Madara, this is my soon-to-be wife, Mito-chan! Mito-chan, this is my best friend, Uchiha Madara!"
Mito studied Madara for a moment, before nodding to herself. "He looks more fun than your brother." She said calmly, causing Madara to smirk. He liked this woman already. Then, Tobirama arrived in a panic.
"Brother! The Kyubi was sighted nearby! It could pose a great threat to the village! We have to eliminate it!"
Madara's eyes were burning with a thirst that only and Uchiha could feel, and Mito … Was making a very cute face to her future husband, visibly buttering him up to accept her request.
"Hashi-kun, could please capture the Kyubi for me? Think of it as a wedding present … please." She said in a most cute manner.
"Why would you want something so destructive for your wedding present?" Asked Tobirama in shock. Mito looked at him like he was stupid.
"Why wouldn't I want something so destructive?" Then her face blossomed into an excited grin as she began to bounce in place. "Oh, something of such power surely can produce such explosions!" She squealed happily, latching again on Hashirama's arm. "Please Hashi-kun?"
"Of course my love!" Exclaimed the goofy Senju. "I'll get you the Kyubi before the day is over!" And with that, Hashirama darted away, intent on capturing an immensely powerful and explosion prone fox for his fiancée.
Madara looked at the young woman in awe, and joy welled in his heart as manly tears of happiness flowed down his cheeks. "Oh, Mother Amaterasu, be praised! There is someone not Uchiha that appreciate the beauty of fire and destruction!"
"Oh please." Said Mito, waving her hand dismissively. "The love of explosions is a common Uzumaki trait, even more common than the love of ramen."
Madara's grin turned shit-eating. "Well Mito, why not go to the training ground and compare notes?"
"Sure Nii-san!" Happily answered the fiery beauty.
The symphony of explosions and mad cackling that followed caused quite a few ninja to tremble in fear.
The teacher shuddered discreetly before ordering the small ball of fiery retribution to go to her seat and stop beating her classmates with another classmate. The little Uzumaki huffed in indignation and looked for a seat … Right before a non-descript boy was brutally ejected from his seat by a black-haired girl with the Uchiha crest on her back, said girl waving Kushina over with an excited grin on her face. Kushina made her way over to her despite being weary. After she sat down, the young Uchiha began talking.
"Hi, I'm Uchiha Mikoto! I like your hair! It reminds me of fire and stuff! It's awesome! Say, you're an Uzumaki, right? So you know how to make exploding tags, right? Can we go to the training grounds after class? I'd love to see what your tags can do!" Excitedly said Mikoto, causing Kushina to grin widely.
"Yeah, I know all about exploding tags! I know about 12 different designs, and I can even change the shape of the explosion!" She bragged, causing Mikoto to squeal happily and almost everyone else to shudder in fear. "I even have a tag that imitates a pyroclastic surge!"
"We're gonna be the best friends ever!" Gushed the not-quite-soon-to-be Uchiha Matriarch.
Up in the rows, a blond kid sitting next to the other Uchiha in class was trying to contain his nosebleed.
"Good choice Minato, good choice. A woman that appreciates the beauty of fire, you have taste my friend." Said Fugaku approvingly.
Kakashi looked at his team as they arrived from their classroom. He had studied the files, and he was fucking disappointed. Sakura was a fangirl, plain and simple, Sasuke was obsessed with vengeance and was showing absolutely no sign of the fire-loving Uchihaness, and lastly Naruto was a poor Namikaze and a failure of an Uzumaki, even his pranks lacked in explosions dammit!
"Alright, we'll introduce ourselves. I'm Hatake Kakashi, I like Icha Icha, I currently dislike you all, my dream is to find a worthwhile team of ninja to train, and my hobby is reading Icha Icha. Pinky, you first."
Kakashi almost cried at the fangirlish display. "Alright, you next blondie." He hoped he could show the way to the kid and introduce him to explosions.
"Alright! I'm Uzumaki Naruto! I like ramen …" There was a good point; he was partly Uzumaki at least. " … gardening, and Fuinjutsu!" Oh?
"Why would an idiot like you like fuinjutsu?" Asked Sakura derisively, almost causing Kakashi to sock her in the face. Naruto was on the good way, how dare that bitch try to dissuade him!?
"Because Fuinjutsu lets you make loads of fun sealing tags, like the exploding tags!" Could it be? Oh joy! "And nothing's better than explosions!" Kakashi had to restrain himself lest he hug the kid.
"Hn, you're right on that." Oh dear gods, Sasuke too! "Explosions cause destruction and fire, and I love fire." Said Sasuke with a psychotic grin. Kakashi had to actively restrain himself from weeping in joy at the conversation on the best ways of creating burning mayhem that followed. By the time they reached the conclusion that incendiary tags were the best compromise, Kakashi was convinced.
"I was supposed to give you a test to see if you were worthy of being Konoha genin, but after this, I already know. Meet me tomorrow at training ground 3 at 6 AM sharp to start training. I won't even be late."
Deidara looked at the Konoha team with awe, tears of emotions welling in his eyes.
"Such … Beauty! This is Art! Oh, why, why must I fight two fellow artists?" He mourned regretfully.
"Yeah, why?" Asked Naruto. "Why not join us? I mean, you make some pretty awesome explosions!"
"And the fire created by them looks beautiful!" Added Sasuke.
Deidara took a moment to think … before riping off his Akatsuki cloak. He would NOT fight against kindred spirits!
Sasori turned to Kakashi. "Is it too late to surrender?" Kakashi eye-smiled.
Author Note:
And done, now, onto the next chapter!
