Author's Note: I will never, ever be happy with this chapter, but it's time to put it out there. :(
On the day of his fifteenth wedding anniversary, Erik became a widower.
Gaia had been ill off and on for several weeks, and had continued to dismiss the worries of her teenage son and his father. "Would you two stop fussing already? You're going to worry Cadence," she insisted, coughing flecks of blood into her handkerchief. "I've been ill a hundred times before. I haven't gone anywhere yet, and I'm not going anywhere now," she insisted stubbornly. "Now where is Cadence, we're suppose to go pick out a new kitten today."
The cat Erik had given his wife had lived a long, full life, and had passed away quietly in her sleep. Gaia and her five year old daughter had been heartbroken, and the woman was forced to explain the principle of death to a girl she felt was far too young to be hearing such things. "I know you're sad, my little dove, but she loved us as dearly as we loved her. She is probably hunting mice for us in heaven right now," Gaia promised with a sad smile, wiping at her own eyes. "Do you remember that time she brought you that mouse right to your bed? You were her little kitten just like you are mine."
Cadence nodded tearfully. "Do animals really get to go to heaven like people do, Mama?" The girl asked, large brown eyes looking dolefully at her mother. The woman nodded confidently.
"I am certain of it. We'll all be together again someday, no matter what happens. You, me, Papa, Adrian, even Angel and Sophie," Gaia promised, glaring at Erik a little when he hung his head from the doorframe; that had not been the story he was told when his precious dog Sasha had been murdered by a group of angry village boys, but he said nothing. Cadence hugged her mother tightly.
"I'm glad, then. Heaven sounds so beautiful. I'm sure has lots of warm laps to sit on, and plenty of people to stroke her," Cadence said so sweetly Gaia could not help but chuckle.
"I'm sure you're right, my little dove. Come now, we'll find a new kitten to love and to terrorize the mice," the woman smiled, picking up her daughter and carrying her on her hip, pecking Erik at the door as she stepped out.
Erik touched his lips gently, brow furrowed curiously. "Gaia, wait a moment. Cadence darling, why don't you go see if Adrian needs anything from the market before you go."
"Yes, Papa," smiled the girl, stepping down from her mother's arms to go and see her brother, whom she adored just as much as Adrian adored her. As soon as she was gone Erik kissed his wife again, more deeply. Gaia returned the gesture and smiled on his lips.
"Someone's in a mood today," she smiled coyly. "Maybe if you promise to be good I'll pick up a nice bottle of brandy and some pears while I'm out and we'll share some dessert after supper," she offered, knowing it was one of her husband's favorite treats.
"You taste like blood," he announced, and Gaia's smiled turned immediately to a frown. "I don't want you going out today."
"Nonsense, Erik. It's probably just the lamb we had for lunch-"
"I know what blood tastes like, Gaia, and you taste of it," Erik told her firmly, having been struck about the face more than enough times to recognize the sickly metallic taste. "You've been coughing blood again, haven't you been?"
"Only a little. Honestly Erik, every time I sneeze you're right behind me checking me for a fever-"
"Coughing blood is different, Gaia. It is a very, very serious matter," he told her firmly. "I'll take Cadence into town, I want you to stay home today."
"This is important to me, Erik. Angel was near and dear to my heart, you know that. I know it seems silly to you that I am mourning over a cat, but my heart aches, and so does Cadences."
"I understand what it means to mourn for a pet, Gaia, but your health is more important to me than any animal."
"Then rest assured when I tell you that I am fine. This is important to me," she reiterated. "And for Cadence. We won't be gone long," she promised, moving past her husband down the stairs. "Cadence darling, time to go!"
Cadence ran into the room into her mother's arms. "Adrian says he would like a new quill, since the nib of his is broken."
"Well I think we can take care of that for him," Gaia smiled, kissing her husband where he stood on the bottom step. "Was there anything you needed, Erik?"
"Only for you to come back to me safely," Erik told her, and Gaia kissed him again before Cadence grabbed her father's face and kissed him also. "You as well, my darling girl," the man promised to his daughter, who smiled so brightly Erik could not help but return the gesture. As close as he had come to Adrian as the boy grew older, sweet little Cadence would always hold an untouchable place in his heart he suspected every father held for his daughter.
Five hours later when Gaia had not returned, Erik began pacing like a wild animal. Adrian, now thirteen years old but as mature as any man, dared to grab his father by the arm to stop his wild movements. "Papa, please. You're making me nervous. Let me go and look for them. You can wait here in case they return," The boy offered, his voice finally starting to suit his adult appearance.
Erik waved the boy off. "You can't go into the city alone, they'll murder you."
"You do fine when you go alone, and I'm not any more horrible than you are. Please, Papa. I'll come back before dark, and I promise I will have them with me."
"My answer is no. If anyone goes into Modena it will be me," Erik told him firmly, and Adrian moved to the window with a frown. Another hour passed, and Adrian perked up. "Papa! Someone's coming up the road!"
Erik immediately moved outside to the road with Adrian in pursuit. Sure enough Gaia and Cadence rode into view, and Erik moved to the stable. "Where the hell have you been? We've been worried sick about you all day!"
"I'm sorry, Erik. I was held up," Gaia apologized, passing Cadence to Erik as she dismounted and moved to collect a small kitten from the saddle bag.
It was then Erik caught sight of her wrist, which had a red spot on it. "You've had blood drawn! Did you go to the hospital?" Erik demanded, and Gaia glared at him.
"Can we please go inside, Erik? I'm exhausted," Gaia pleaded, and Erik bit his tongue and moved inside. Erik set Cadence down, and Gaia handed the girl the small tabby-type kitten. Adrian came inside behind them and hugged his mother tightly before moving to Cadence.
"Cadence, come and show me your new pet?" He asked, eager to draw her away from their parents and from the fight that would undoubtedly ensue.
As soon as the children moved into the study, and Erik rounded on his wife. "What the hell happened, Gaia?"
"…I collapsed in the market. I woke up not too long later in the hospital. A physician was in the market on his day of and brought me in. I left the moment they would let me, Erik," she promised, and Erik frowned.
"Well, what did the physician say?"
Gaia bit her lip. "That I ought to stay. That my heart was weak, which is why I fainted. Brilliant man diagnosed me with consumption, which I told him I had as soon as I woke. Now if you don't mind, I'm quite exhausted. Do you think you could handle supper tonight?"
"Of course. Go rest," Erik told her with a bit of a sigh as she kissed him and moved upstairs.
Gaia's condition never improved. The next morning she did not wake until nearly noon, drenched in sweat and coughing deeply. A day later, she could hardly breath. Erik took care of the children as best he could while trying to take care of his wife as well. Finally Cadence and Adrian came into their parents bedroom to wish Gaia goodnight before Erik put them to bed. Gaia smiled and wished her son and daughter sweet dreams. Adrian sensed something was different about her behavior that night, and frowned deeply as he left the room with Cadence and Erik for bed.
Erik returned before long and moved into bed with his wife, who immediately moved into his arms. "Adrian is upset," he told her quietly, and Gaia nodded.
"…He knows I'm leaving soon," Gaia whispered, and Erik frowned deeply; this was the first time he could remember Gaia ever admitting she was truly ill. "He's always been terribly perceptive, that boy."
"He has been. You're not… you're not leaving too soon, I hope," Erik ventured, and Gaia closed her eyes tightly.
"Only God can say… But it hurts, Erik," she admitted quietly. "Every breath is like breathing fire. I have to think about breathing, it doesn't come naturally anymore. I'm so afraid I'm going to fall asleep and forget to breath…"
Erik wiped fiercely at his eyes and kissed his wife soundly, disheartened by the taste of blood on her lips. "Don't sleep then. Stay up with me. You don't even have to talk if it hurts too much, we'll simply be awake together," he promised, and Gaia frowned.
"Erik I'm so sorry. I never, ever wanted to see you like this…"
"Like what?" He asked. "So completely in love that I cannot bear to let you go?" He kissed his wife deeply, again and again as she began to cry. "Please don't leave me, Gaia."
"I don't want to, Erik," she cried painfully, returning each and every kiss. "I never want to be apart from you. Erik I'm so afraid I won't ever see you again."
"Don't say that, Gaia! Don't even think such a thing. We will be together again, My Love. I swear on my life, we will be together."
"Please, Erik, don't make a promise you cannot keep-" she begged, and Erik shook his head tearfully.
"I will keep it, Gaia. I swear I will see you again. I will never be happy again until I do."
Gaia shook her head. "Please don't say that… I don't ever want to think of you unhappy. Our children need you to be happy…"
"I can't, Gaia. I simply can't. I need you."
Gaia shook her head and coughed heavily before she could protest, crying quietly. Erik stroked her hair and kissed at her tears. Ever so softly he began to sing a gentle little Italian lullaby that she had used to sing to their children when they had trouble sleeping. Gaia's tears quieted before long, nestling into his chest. "I love you, Erik," she whispered quietly into his chest, closing her eyes.
"I love you too, Gaia. Get some rest. I'll see you in the morning," he told her softly, and she nodded quietly.
When Erik awoke the following morning, Gaia was gone. She was still nestled into his arms, eyes closed gently and lips parted slightly in a subconscious attempt to ease her breathing that had not availed. Erik wailed in anguish and pulled his limp wife into his arms, shaking her firmly in a desperate attempt to coax her to breathe. Adrian bolted into the room and collapsed on the floor in grief at the sight of his father in tears, cradling his mother who simply would not respond.
Cadence walked into the room, holding her little kitten carefully with one hand as she wiped the sleep from her eyes. "Papa? Mama? What's wrong?"
Adrian pulled the girl into his arms and put the kitten gently down onto the floor to hold his little sister tightly as he cried.
"Take her away!" Erik shouted in anguish, burring his face into his wife's hair. "Take her out of here!"
"But Papa-"
"Do as I say, Adrian!" The man barked before sobbing, and Cadence began to cry.
"Adrian what's wrong? Why is Papa angry?" Shaking, the young man stood and took his sister's hand after she picked up her furry little bundle.
"Come downstairs and have some water, Cadence," Adrian insisted, walking downstairs with sister in tow as the upstairs erupted in noise. Glass shattered, wood splintered, and Cadence's cries of fear prompted Adrian move back upstairs, throwing open the door of his father's bedroom and shouting at the man.
"Papa, stop this! You're scaring Cadence!" The young man commanded, ducking as his father hurled a clock at him viciously. "Father STOP! She wouldn't want you to be like this!" Adrian told him tearfully. "She would never want you to destroy everything you have!"
Adrian's insistence did nothing, and finally the young man rushed forward and grabbed his father by the arms in an attempt to restrain him. Erik fought ferociously, but the boy was strong like his father an the man was weak from grief. Erik finally collapsed to the floor in tears, clutching at his son desperately. "I can't live without her. I can't live. I want to die," he wailed in anguish, and Adrian hugged him tightly, greatly unnerved by his father's unusual display of emotion.
"You have to, Papa. Cadence needs you. I need you. You're our father… without her we need you more than ever," Adrian told him, tearfully.
Erik cried and cried until Cadence appeared in the doorway again, wiping at her eyes. Erik spotted her and frowned deeply, opening an arm to welcome her. Cadence moved into his arms and Erik held her children tightly.
If he was ever going to survive the loss of his wife, he was going to need his children as much as they needed him.
