The chapter heading is taken from a piece of the Carmina Burana, namely Estuans Interius. In the song someone is referring to himself as a person with a dead soul. I considered changing it into Mortua, which would be the feminine form, but I didn't want to lay hands on the quote even for the sake of context.
Chapter 29
Mortuus in anima
Núria could hardly suppress her shock when she saw the children. In Lusacan's sphere they had looked somewhere between indifferent and depressed. Those however … The boy seemed defiant - a sentiment Núria could understand, considering Morrigan was standing next to her with a sword in her hand and a challenging look. The girl however … Evil was a strong word, and she was very aware that it most certainly wasn't the right one, but it was the first that came to her mind all the same.
'We are here to stop the dragon from sending armies of monsters into the world,' Núria said. 'Every time one of the Old Gods wakes from their sleep, they bring death and destruction. Surely you understand I am doing what I must.'
'Death and destruction?' the girl repeated. 'Aren't you here to bring that to us?'
'How could something so pure as Razikale bring death?' the boy asked his sister. 'He brings secrets and wonders to his own.'
'When Razikale wakes up, he will not be himself,' Núria explained. 'His soul will be controlled by foul, mindless creatures, and he will do their will, not his own.'
'You killed Lusacan, and now you seek the death of Razikale, trying to convince us of your good intentions with vile lies,' the girl stated without any anger in her voice - or fear, for that matter. 'We will not allow it! Razikale is the last, and he will live.' With a blink of an eye, they were all frozen. She walked up to Morrigan and took the sword out of her unresisting hands.
'What if they speak the truth?' the boy asked his sister, placing his hand on her wrist. 'What if they try to protect themselves, like our people did when we were brought here?'
'So you believe their sordid tales?' she asked, still without any emotion in her voice. 'You really think that Razikale would harm our home?' The boy shrugged.
'We have been here for too long,' he told her. 'Return the sword to them. If time can change this place and us, it sure can change Razikale.' Finally, the girl lost her patience. Her eyes narrowed and she stared at her brother with a fierce glare.
'Time never changed this place,' she said in barely more than a hiss. 'How dare you suggest what formed our new home was anything but our master's will? You are weak. I will defend him on my own, if I must.' With that, she swung the sword as though it were weightless, cutting her own brother's head off remorselessly. Then, without a backwards glance, she ran away at impossible speed.
Slowly, the magic binding Núria and the others lifted, and they could move again. 'So what is our plan B?' Zevran asked Morrigan. 'Now that we've established this isn't going to be just the same again.'
'We follow her, of course,' Morrigan said simply.
'Will she be able to attack us both with the sword and with magic?' Núria asked. 'I mean, in fact, she could have killed us right now.'
'I wonder if she could,' the witch said calmly, looking at the corpse of the boy. It was becoming see-through and Núria guessed it would be gone without a trace within a minute. 'Perhaps she cannot hurt us with her magic but only with the weapon. I do not know.'
'So what are we waiting for?' Núria asked. 'Let's go after her. If we can't catch her we can still think of something else.' Jowan handed Darya back to Morrigan, and they set off in the direction the girl had fled.
'I know you do not care for what I have to say,' Morrigan said, 'but surely you are aware that it takes more than brandishing a sword to be an Arcane Warrior. If it were that simple, there would be some of them around.'
'I bet there's something in the Circle Tower's library,' Jowan said lightly. 'That they don't teach apprentices doesn't mean it isn't there or even forbidden. Perhaps it's just not a popular enough thing. I mean, let's face it, most mages like flinging spells left, right, and centre and don't care for close combat. I just think Zevran's right: It could save my neck in a case of emergency.' Morrigan nodded.
'Very well,' she said. 'So you are going to ask politely at the tower if you might borrow a book?' Jowan sighed.
'No,' he said pointedly. 'I'm going to ask Aisling to get it for me. By letter, if you have to know. When we're at Vigil's Keep.'
'All right then,' the witch said, smiling slightly. 'If you think 'tis worth the bother.'
'Is that all?' Zevran asked. 'No smart comments? Nothing more to get in his hair?'
'I am not you,' Morrigan told him scathingly.
'Ah, the better for me,' Zevran replied with a grin. 'Is it my turn then?'
'Honestly, what is it with the two of you?' Leliana asked in a slightly exasperated voice. Zevran raised his eyebrows at her.
'You must really like him, if you put so much effort into defending him against me,' he said.
'I do,' she replied firmly, her hands on her hips. 'So what?'
'Being a bard, you must have quite some experience,' Zevran said.
'Charming,' Leliana interrupted him. 'You could have taught him some manners, Núria.' Núria grinned.
'Manners?' she repeated. 'Zev? Are you feverish?'
'Must be,' the bard muttered. 'I know I'll regret asking, but what is your point, Zev?'
'Oh, only that he must be quite the stallion for you to be so careful to keep him happy,' Zevran told her in a carrying whisper.
'Also, it's good to be in a mage's good graces,' Leliana replied in the same would-be secretive manner. 'So if I really want someone to be gagged, I just need to ask.' Zevran threw his head back and laughed. Núria tried to restrain herself but couldn't help it.
'Leliana, could you help me with something?' she asked, falling back and staring somewhere between the trees. 'I need the eyes of an archer … or her opinion.'
'Certainly,' the Orlesian said and stepped beside her. She glanced in the same direction. 'Now what am I supposed to see there?'
'Look, there on the tree Morrigan took the sword from,' Núria insisted. Leliana shadowed her eyes and tried to see something of significance.
'I can't even see the tree, let alone anything of interest,' she told her finally, giving up.
'I see something very interesting, though,' Núria said with a grin. 'We can talk for a moment. Alone.'
'Oh,' Leliana made. 'I guess I know what's coming now.' Núria grinned.
'Then tell me already,' she prompted her. 'How are you and Jowan … getting along?' Leliana smiled.
'Getting along?' she repeated. 'Perfectly. But that wasn't your question. To answer that … We haven't got there yet. We nearly did, but then Morrigan fell into her cenote.' Núria grinned.
'I thought so,' she said. 'And ever since then, there was no opportunity. To be honest, I'd have thought you'd cross that particular line a lot sooner.' Leliana blinked and started walking after the others again.
'It's just … I am so nervous,' she said softly. 'I shouldn't be, I mean, let's face it, Zev has a point: I'm not exactly innocent. But Jowan … it's been a while since someone has meant so much to me. I had hoped he would be the one to take the lead.' Núria smiled.
'If you ask me, your mage has been with one woman so far, if at all,' she said. 'You can barely expect him to be more confident than you.'
'I know,' Leliana said. They were almost back at their small group. 'And to be perfectly honest, I can't wait till we're done here.' With a wink, she closed the small distance and fell into step beside Jowan, who looked down at her with a sweet, gentle smile.
'I can sense we're near the girl,' Morrigan said softly. 'I wonder about the dimensions of this sphere. Perhaps the death of the boy weakened it and made it smaller.'
'It feels … different,' Jowan noted. 'I have a feeling we should get out of here real quick once we're done. When the child is dead, so we will be unless we retreat at once.' Morrigan nodded.
'True,' she said. 'We will not have much time.' The witch halted. 'We will meet her very soon, and I am certain she knows of our presence as well, so she will be prepared. You can do nothing, so do not act the hero. Jowan, you are responsible for Darya, and her alone. Protect her at all costs. I can look after myself.' Again she handed her child to the mage, who nodded. Morrigan strode on before them.
'I'll keep us all safe, if I can,' the mage told the small babe in his arms. 'You mother included, even if she doesn't think she needs help.'
'Come out, I know you're here,' Morrigan shouted, and out of nowhere, there she was. The sword looked smaller in the girl's hands than it had in Morrigan's, Núria realised now, and also, she looked less solid.
'Killing her brother didn't exactly strengthen her, it seems,' she gave voice to her observation.
'Yes, and the same thing that happened to her is happening to the entire sphere,' Jowan replied. 'If this place was dangerous before, it's like standing on top of a volcano right now.'
'Perhaps you can destroy us,' the girl said in a harsh voice, 'but I will take you with me.' It became clear that she didn't need the sword. She closed her eyes, and Núria had a strong feeling of déjà-vu as Morrigan was ripped into the air with her mouth open and her arms limp at her sides. Jowan gave a yell of shock and stared at the witch with his right hand held out to her, while with his left arm he still held Darya. Leliana took her gently out of his arms, rocking the child that was squirming and wincing. Núria wondered if she felt that two combating powers were tearing at her mother, who was hovering helplessly above the ground. A stain of blood was on the front of her robes, but it didn't look life threatening. That fact seemed to be thanks to Jowan, who had done something - whatever that was - to protect her. The child tried desperately to break his spell, her eyes only on the witch.
'Jowan, end this!' Zevran shouted, and the mage came out of his reverie. He darted towards the girl, who looked nothing short of astounded that a mage would tackle her rather than using magic. With a quick movement, he grabbed the sword out of her hand and rammed it into her chest. A moment later, the ground gave underneath Núria. She saw Leliana holding the now screaming Darya tightly in her arms, Zevran right next to her with a look of shock on his face, Morrigan, crumbling to the floor as Jowan's spell finally broke - and Jowan, still on the ground next to the body of the girl that was dissolving into nothing. He too was sinking into the earth beneath. The last thing she saw before the world swallowed her was his hand closing around the blade.
Núria woke up with a groan on her lips. Carefully, she tested her limbs for functionality. She wasn't even in pain, she noted, but she felt as though an army of ants was crawling over her entire body. Someone was screaming, and Núria shook off the unconsciousness that tried to grip her again. She sat up as quickly as she dared.
The others, she observed, were still on the floor, but at least Leliana and Zevran were stirring. The screams were coming from Darya, and Núria, not quite trusting her legs at the moment, crawled over to her. She looked her over, and as far as she could tell, the child was in terror but unscathed. 'Is everyone fine?' Leliana asked slightly weakly, sitting up cautiously herself.
'I've been better, but I'm not dead, I think,' Zevran said in as light a tone as he managed. He recovered with a speed Núria admired, walking to Morrigan and Jowan. When he looked back at Núria and Leliana she knew there was something terribly wrong.
'Zev?' she asked carefully. He walked back to them in silence and sank to the floor beside them.
'Morrigan is dead,' he said at last. 'And Jowan is injured. Badly.'
'How badly?' Leliana asked breathlessly, scrambling to her feet after gathering Darya from the ground and hurrying over. Núria followed her without a moment of hesitation.
He didn't even look so severely injured. There was a deep cut in the palm of his hand that was still curled as though it was gripping something, but other than that, he had no visible wound. Still, his face was pale and contorted, his eyes squeezed shut. His breath was shallow and quick. Leliana was kneeling next to him, for once lost for words. 'Zev, what's wrong with him?' Núria asked softly, and the Antivan huffed.
'Other than that he's dying, I don't know,' he said. 'It eludes me what killed Morrigan, but my guess is he got the same. That and more.' He indicated the cut in his hand. 'He did as she told him. He saved Morrigan's daughter from whatever hurt her and him.' Leliana gave a soft sob and Núria put an arm around her shoulder.
'Is there no way of saving him?' she asked in a whisper, and Zevran shrugged.
'I don't know one,' he said. 'With Morrigan dead, we can only hope. We will bandage his hand, keep him warm, and wait.'
Leliana lit their fire again, and Zevran carried the mage to it as though he were as light as a child. Then he brought Morrigan's body to the edge of the camp, placing her on the floor as gently as if she were alive.
Afterwards, Núria wouldn't have been able to say how long they sat there before one of them moved or spoke. At one point Zevran asked vaguely if they were hungry, but when they just shook their heads, he simply nodded. He didn't eat, either, though. After nightfall, Núria and Zevran retreated to their tent while Leliana remained outside, keeping the fire going. Núria offered to take Darya, but the bard insisted that she keep her.
After waiting for any change in Jowan's condition for two full days, Núria started wondering what they were going to do if he was in some sort of magical shock. They couldn't carry him out of the Donarks, but leaving him to be eaten by animals wasn't an option either. Leliana was keeping Darya alive by grinding anything edible until it was a fine powder she then formed into a paste by adding water. At first, the child refused entirely, but after a while, she became hungry enough to eat.
It was on the third evening Núria decided that they had to move on - even if that did mean leaving the mage for dead: Darya wouldn't survive this kind of nourishment forever, and if Jowan had to die, his sacrifice shouldn't be in vain. She glanced at the mage lying curled into a tight ball next to the fire and opened her mouth to ask Zevran what he thought they should do. Quickly, she closed it and looked again. 'Leliana,' she called softly. For once, the bard was in her tent with the child, but she came at once. 'Look,' Núria said simply.
'Is he dead?' Leliana asked tremulously.
'Look at him,' Núria insisted. Finally, Leliana glanced at the figure on the ground.
'Maker,' she breathed.
'Would someone enlighten me how this is different to yesterday?' Zevran asked. Leliana swallowed. Her eyes were overly bright, the fire giving them a keen shimmer.
'He moved,' she whispered, sinking to her knees beside him. 'He wasn't that curled.' Her hand brushed through his hair, caressing him. Very carefully, she turned him on his back and stroked his cheek, calling his name softly but insistently. After the fourth time a tremor ran through his body and his eyes flickered open. For a moment he looked utterly confused, then his eyes found Leliana holding Darya.
'Are you two fine?' he rasped, and Leliana nodded. 'Morrigan is dead,' he said then. 'She was already dead from the girl's spell, I could only stop her from using her life-force.' He struggled to a sitting position helped by Leliana. 'I never thought the twins would wield such power. If this one had grown up and become a fully fledged mage, and not a demented guardian of a sleeping god …' He looked at his bandaged hand and gave Núria an apologetic look. 'I know I said I was done with blood magic, but I had no other way to save Darya. I needed more power than I could muster in the short time.' Núria stared at him for a moment before she burst into a mad fit of laughter.
'Like I care,' she said emphatically. 'Like I said, use whatever you have. Especially if it saves people.' Jowan nodded. His eyes turned to Leliana.
'And you?' he asked almost timidly. 'I swear I would never hurt a hair on your head, but I understand if you'd rather I stayed away from you. Magic freaks people out even when it's healing magic.' Leliana placed Darya carefully on the ground before she leaned down to kiss Jowan gently on his lips.
'Don't you dare and stay away,' she whispered in a quavering voice. 'Actually, you can barely be close enough to me.'
