Date written: Thu 29 Oct 2009
Author: Starway Man
E-mail: theop at hotkey dot net dot au
Disclaimer: The Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar, Kuzui, Fox, WB and UPN; I don't own 'em, and I never will. I also do not own any other characters from any television shows, movies, comics, videogames or literature that I might use. This work is meant merely for enjoyment, and no profit is being made off of it. Some of the text is from various TV episodes or movies or comics or videogames or literature, and so does not belong to me of course.
Rating: Overall R, with mostly PG-13 parts.
Symbols: " " denotes speech, ( italics ) specifies thoughts, and # # indicates phone voice.
Main characters: Xander, ensemble
Warnings: There is some violence, bad language, character death and mention of sexual situations in these stories.
Author Notes: A couple of years ago Night Hunter MGS (a.k.a. Matt) wrote an awesome series of stories called "31 Days of Xanderween" (http://www .fanfiction .net/s/3813208/1/31_Days_of_Xanderween), where he published one Halloween fic for each day of October. I was inspired enough to want to do my own version of the concept, and he has graciously allowed me to use his idea for this series of fanfic stories.
Author Notes 2: Greetings everyone, wow – over 150 reviews! I never expected to get this far when this series started, so thanks for all the feedback. I know I've been saying that a lot over the past month or so, but without it, most likely I wouldn't have gotten this far, gosh darn it! Jason Barnett, I'm sorry you didn't like the previous story but please don't think I was bashing Willow or anything; that's not something which I was aiming for, I promise. Anyway, this latest story idea is based on a XanderZone posting that took place a few months ago, which one of my beta readers told me about. I'm not sure if I've followed it verbatim, but whoever came up with the idea, thanks and I did my best, sorry if I got anything wrong.
Acknowledgments: My thanks of course to Matt for allowing me to dabble with his original idea this way. Also, my deepest gratitude to all my beta readers – Francis Eugene, Greywizard, American Soldier and Nodakskip – for all their help in getting these stories finished on time!
Classification: Alternate Universe, Angst, Crossover, Romance, YAHF
Summary: Thirty-one versions of Halloween, Xander-style. Fic-a-day series.
Title:31 Days of Xanderween Part Deux
***
Story 29: Steele In Control
Somewhere on the streets of Sunnydale, California
October 31st, 1997
"Well, look who we've got 'ere," the vampire known as Spike drawled, as he stared at all his captives – most of who were glaring at him, struggling to get loose from the demons holding them prisoner in the warehouse. "Regular li'l detective's convention, innit?"
Spike definitely had a point; this year for the annual Halloween safety escort program, for some reason known only to the gods above and below, Principal Snyder had listened to the Drama teacher named Mr. Hindley, and decided that the junior year students had to dress up as either historical or fictional detectives. Some kids had dressed up as Sherlock Holmes, others as Sam Spade or Philip Marlowe; but for the group known as the Scooby Gang, it was a very different set of Halloween costumes that had been purchased from Ethan's Costume Shop yesterday.
In brief, Xander Harris had dressed up as the one and only Remington Steele, a Humphrey Bogart-loving thief-slash-con man who had assumed a nonexistent detective's life and later decided to play the part permanently. Buffy Summers, Willow Rosenberg, Cordelia Chase and Harmony Kendall, on the other hand, had all dressed up as members of Charlie's Angels; a group of beautiful private investigators working for a mysterious boss known as Charles Townsend.
Thus, the TV show characters known as Jill Munroe, Kelly Garrett, Julie Rogers and Kris Munroe struggled helplessly as Spike sauntered over to the former vampire Slayer. Taking a moment to smirk at the Farrah Fawcett hairstyle, Spike said to Jill, "Bloody hell. You're not even a Slayer anymore, are you? I could do anything I liked to you, pet; show you just how much of a party animal I can really be – and there ain't a thing you could do to stop me..."
"Leave her alone, you horse's arse!" Remington's accented voice shouted angrily, as he tried to get loose from the...things...holding him prisoner. Steele still had no idea what was going on tonight and how he was going to get out of this alive, not to mention help his female companions escape. But the one-time crook knew he was damned if he was going to just give up and die at the hands of this bleached-blonde nightmare.
Steele then added cuttingly, "Pick on someone your own size! Unless of course, it's as I suspect – and you simply don't measure up where it counts..."
Now THAT was enough to set Spike's teeth on edge. He strode over to the male captive and slugged Steele hard enough to break ribs. "Y'know, mate, you're beginning to piss me off," William the Bloody said conversationally, as flecks of blood began to appear at the corner of Xander's lips, thanks to his lungs being pierced. "Prob'ly oughta do you in right now, come to think of it. Why the hell should I keep you alive? Don't happen to swing that way, after all."
( Well, apart from that one time with the magnificent poof – no! Don't think about that, bleeding heck, focus! It's time to do what we vampires do! ) Spike thought angrily to himself.
Jill Munroe, the sporty, athletic and most famous Charlie's Angel of them all, saw the enemy coming back towards her. "When I get loose, I'm gonna make you regret the day you were ever born!" she shouted at Spike.
"You tell him, Jill!" Kris Munroe, previously the Cordette known as Harmony, called out encouragingly.
Kelly Garret, the exotically beautiful and sophisticated brunette Angel who Cordelia had chosen to dress up as, almost managed to get loose before the child-possessed demon minion recaptured her. She cursed in an extremely unladylike way, struggling once again to escape.
With a growl, Spike strode over to her and slapped the female detective across the face, hard. "You, the bloody cheerleader. Try that again and I'll hurt you before I rip yer head off with me bare hands, got it?"
William then walked over to Julie Rogers, the streetwise tough-talking Angel who used to be Willow, and smacked her as well. "You think I didn't see that gesture, luv? Cor blimey, but you lot are more trouble than you're worth I'd reckon..."
He gestured to his small army, "Kill 'em all, except for the Slayer. She's mine to deal with, personally."
Just as all appeared lost – the Dark Avenger himself, the ensouled vampire known as Angel, burst into the warehouse and began to engage in a desperate battle with the bad guys. When, all of a sudden – the chaos spell that everyone was under ended, and the five teenagers instantly became themselves once more.
"Oh, GROSS!" Buffy shouted, feeling nauseated. Miss Summers could remember everything that had happened tonight, and she could remember everything about Jill Munroe's life too; even those parts where she'd been an undercover criminal and a Playmate centrefold in the line of duty.
The others were also looking revolted, as they stood amongst the squalling and frightened little children. Harmony could remember Kris Munroe's life, and the thought of being Buffy's little sister made her want to hurl. There were also the memories of being, amongst other things, an ice-skating clown, a trucker, a Keystone Cop, an assistant to a circus knife thrower and a singer to deal with.
Willow felt sick remembering everything that Julie Rogers had done in her life, the crimes she'd committed and the time she'd served before becoming an Angel, as well as acute embarrassment at her new physique; it seemed that for modelling and wearing a bikini like Julie had loved to do, she was definitely going to have to upgrade to a new cup size.
If Buffy, Willow and Harmony felt ill, though, Cordelia literally wanted to curl up somewhere and die. She could remember ALL the horrors of Kelly's life – the orphanage, the car chases, kidnappings, chloroformings, explosions, hostage situations, the murderous post-hypnotic suggestion, the heroin addiction, and even two separate incidents of a gunshot wound to the head. Doing her best to savagely repress it all, Miss Chase just motioned to Willow and Harmony to join her as she grabbed Xander by the arm to pull him back.
Harris didn't offer any resistance, as he was clutching his chest in pain; the man was nursing severe internal injuries, thanks to Spike's sledgehammer-like blows. Add to that the memories of Remington Steele – or Harry Chalmers, or Ben Pearson, or Michael O'Leary, or any of the man's other aliases – and Xander could hardly even breathe.
The battle against Spike didn't last long, though, as he had lost all his minions in one fell swoop. After William the Bloody wisely ran off, one of Xander's friends quickly took the male teen to the hospital while the rest took care of the still-terrified prepubescent kids.
Even though none of the gang knew it yet, the events of tonight were a key turning point on the road of destiny. Thanks to their choice of Halloween costumes, the fates of every single member of the group would be irrevocably altered from what had previously been meant to be, from this point onwards.
***
Just outside the Sunnydale town limits, California
September 25th, 1999
"Goodbye Sunnydale," Buffy whispered to herself, as she, Willow and the redhead's boyfriend Oz sped away in the werewolf-musician's truck. As part of her farewell Buffy took a moment to remember Harmony, who had been killed at Graduation, just months ago. She also took a moment to think of her mother, Joyce, and her Watcher, Rupert Giles; it felt painful leaving them behind like this.
"Buffy? Are you feeling okay?" Willow looked around from the front passenger seat, where she was sitting alongside Oz. "Buffy?"
"Yeah, I'm okay," Miss Summers replied. "I feel a little down right now, but I'm sure I'll get over it soon."
"No regrets leaving the Sunnydale Slaying duties to Faith?" Willow asked, referring to the brunette Chosen One who had acted as a decoy and spy in the Mayor's camp, and had helped bring down this year's Big Bad.
"Nah. If anything, I'm just sorry to leave Giles to Faith's tender mercies," Buffy smirked.
"Could be that she's just about given him a stroke by now," Oz commented sagely. He liked the wild child Slayer, but considered her fascination with how far she could rebel against authority unhealthy.
"Oh, I miss Giles already," Willow sighed.
"Well, I'm sure the whiskey's helping him cope with Faith staying on the Hellmouth, and the rest of us leaving," Buffy joked.
"I still can't believe we're gonna be on our own from now on. It's so exciting," Willow practically bounced in her seat in exhilaration.
Smiling, Buffy remembered the day she'd gone to Willow and suggested they try to get into UCLA instead of UC Sunnydale, before time ran out on the application dates. She'd been missing her ex-boyfriend Angel über-bad, as he had abandoned her after Graduation, just walking off into the mist that day. Anyway, after days of intense persuasion and argument on the Slayer's part, Willow had finally agreed, and convinced Oz to come along for the ride. Not that it really took much to persuade him to do it, as wherever Willow would have led him the werewolf would have gladly followed.
Buffy's only regret was that she hadn't been able to locate Xander to ask him if he'd want to come along, and relocate to the big city. He was still off somewhere in parts unknown, and neither of the girls had heard anything from him ever since his last postcard in August. Miss Summers wasn't sure if Harris would have come or not after returning from his Kerouac-style road trip, given that he had no chance of getting into college with his SAT scores – but still, it would have been nice to ask him.
Finally, the van made it to the outskirts of the City of Angels, and Buffy gazed out the window to stare at the metropolis; which, just a few years ago, she used to call home.
"Wow. We're here already?" Miss Summers asked.
"Yep," Oz said laconically. "Welcome to Los Angeles."
***
141 Embury Street, Los Angeles, California
November 6th, 1999
Xander Harris looked at the furnished rental apartment, and then at the apartment manager before glancing back at Buffy, Willow and Oz. ( I think I like this place, and I'm pretty sure they do too... )
Perhaps not unexpectedly, the young man had eventually followed his friends to Los Angeles after arriving back in Sunnydale the day after they'd all left. His parents had decided to start charging him rent to live in his own basement, and Xander's recent encounter with the girl named Anya Jenkins had convinced him that it might be wiser to get out of town in order to avoid her for the foreseeable future.
The ex-vengeance demon did not take rejection well, and Xander's refusal of her sexual advances – thanks to the remnants of the Remington Steele memories – had definitely annoyed her. So with Faith and Giles too busy doing their own thing, and the job market in Sunnydale less than spectacular, Harris had headed south to find the rest of the gang.
"So what do you think?" the apartment manager looked at Xander, bringing him back to the here and now.
"Getting weird vibes off of this place," Oz commented in his Yoda-like way.
"Oz!" Willow chastised him lightly.
"I'm just saying," the werewolf shrugged. "Buffy?"
"Yeah, there's definitely a vibe-iness thing happening here," the blonde Slayer agreed. "I heard the previous tenant broke their lease and ran off last week, it was practically the talk of the entire campus. So what's wrong with this place?"
"There's nothing wrong with it," the manager said stiffly. "It was the tenant who had a problem with the apartment, not the other way around."
"I'll take it," Xander abruptly decided, just before the front door opened – and Cordelia and a guy named Alan Francis Doyle walked in, escorted by a female real estate agent.
"Oh! Estelle, I'm sorry, I didn't know you were showing this place to somebody," the housing agent apologized at once. "I was just bringing these people to look at the apartment-"
"What are you guys doing here?" Cordelia asked, her eyes immediately drawn to her ex-boyfriend. "Especially you, Xander!"
"You people know each other?" the apartment manager looked briefly surprised at the seeming coincidence.
"Hello, Cordelia," Xander replied stonily. Buffy, Willow and Oz instantly looked uncomfortable – well, the girls did anyway – figuring that this was going to be an unwelcome return to the bad old days. "Welcome to my new apartment."
"Your apartment! I thought you said this place was unoccupied?" Cordelia turned her glare towards Doyle.
"It was, until less than a minute ago," Estelle nodded. "Mr. Harris, I'll just go get you the rental forms, I'll be right back." She quickly left out the front door.
"We'd best get going then, princess, don'tcha think?" Doyle asked Cordy after the real estate agent said her farewells and left, knowing there was no sale to be made here. "Angel's probably expecting us back at the office-"
"Angel?" Buffy and Willow demanded at once. "As in MY Angel?" Buffy wanted to know, staring at Cordelia.
"Yes, Buffy, your Angel," Cordelia rolled her eyes. "Your ex-boyfriend, and my current boss – Doyle's, too, for that matter."
"You work for Captain Hairgel? Doing what?" Xander demanded, ignoring Buffy's scowl over the nickname.
"What's it to you?" Cordy asked him belligerently.
"Curiosity over whether he's the only dead weight hanging around that office environment," Xander sniped back.
"Oh, of all the NERVE!" Cordelia snarled.
"Guys, guys! Come on," Willow said nervously. "High school's over now, remember? New start elsewhere and all that. Can't we just put the mistakes of the past behind us?"
Xander and Cordelia simply stared at her for a moment, before answering "No!" in perfect unison.
"You – Doyle, or whatever your name is. Tell me where I can find Angel. I want to talk to him," Buffy said determinedly, deciding to put the childish bickering out of her mind.
"Oh, just take her back to the office," Cordelia gestured, before turning to face Xander. "I want to talk to you, dork – alone."
"Are you sure that's a good idea, Delia?" Doyle asked in concern. But before Miss Chase could answer, Buffy had grabbed him and dragged him out of there, Willow and Oz loyally following after them.
"So, you followed your friends out of Sunnydale? Well, big surprise. You never could stop hiding behind your Buffy, could you?" Cordelia asked nastily.
"Is there a point to this conversation, or should I be asking you to get out of my new apartment?" Xander shot back.
Cordelia fought down the overwhelming urge to let loose at this jerk, guns blazing. She knew it wouldn't help attain her objective, so she said as calmly as possible, "Look, I know you got here first – but, I-I need this apartment more than you do-"
"I don't care!" Xander told her bluntly.
"Damn it, Xander – I've been running around looking at one place after the other, all day!" Cordelia told him passionately, gesturing wildly. "I've been living in filth for the last month, I've been stuck in an apartment that ended up full of cockroaches – all skinny feet and, like, huge antlers! Please – I have to have this apartment, it's the only decent thing I can afford! So what's it going to take for you to back off and let me have it?"
"Weren't you listening to me before? You can't have this apartment. Because you have nothing that I want," Harris told her quite frankly.
"Mr. Harris, I have the rental forms right here," Estelle came back in with some forms in her hand, which she handed over to Xander. When the young man saw how much it would cost to acquire the rent-controlled apartment, though, his eyes went wide.
"You're asking this much per month, as well as the security deposit?" Xander had to say it.
Cordelia grabbed the papers. "I'll pay it!"
"No, you won't!" Xander grabbed the papers back.
"Well, you obviously can't afford it!" Miss Chase retorted, as a tug of war began.
"Well, you're not taking this place away from me!"
"Let go, you loser!" Cordelia began to scream, oblivious to the watching Estelle.
"The hell I will, you airhead!" Xander screamed back, equally oblivious to the apartment manager.
( Are these two insane? ) Estelle asked herself, before she let out a loud, piercing whistle. "All right, that's it. Both of you, out! Neither of you are moving in here, if that's gonna be your attitude!"
"No, no, no!" Xander said hastily, as he let go of the rental papers. "Uh, really, this is just a, a minor misunderstanding. Cordelia and I are actually the best of friends – she was once the love of my life, even!" Harris then grabbed the brunette and held her close, despite the look on Cordelia's face for his unwelcome familiarity. "We dated for over a year in high school!"
"Is that true?" Estelle asked testily.
"Well, yeah..." Then Cordelia slowly began to smile. "In fact, that's why we're gonna move into this apartment together, in order to share the rent and living expenses."
"We're WHAT?!" Xander yelped, letting go and looking at her as if she was crazy. "OW!" he then cried out, as Cordelia kicked him in the shin.
"Could I have a pen, please?" Queen C asked regally, before she put her name on the papers as Xander hopped around on one foot in terrible pain. "It's your turn, sign on the dotted line. Come on, Xander, hurry up!" Miss Chase snapped irritably, as Estelle simply shook her head at the teenagers' antics. "I've got to get back to work before sunset, remember?"
***
Angel Investigations headquarters, Los Angeles, California
A while later
"So lemme get this straight, you two and Delia were actually Charlie's Angels for one night two years ago?" Doyle asked in astonishment, while he and the three Scoobies were waiting for Angel to return. "Why didn't the big brooding vampire or the princess ever tell me that?"
"It's, it's not something we like to talk about much, or even think about much," Willow offered, reminded yet again of the night her cleavage had been mystically enhanced. She glanced at Buffy, whom she suspected was thinking about Harmony; the pseudo-sister hadn't actually become a friend over the years, but she'd no longer really been an enemy, either, before she'd died at Graduation. Miss Rosenberg added, "And I think Cordelia deliberately did something to make herself forget all that, after her family lost all its money. Too many bad memories in the mix."
"And that fella you girls were with at the apartment before?" Doyle asked.
"Xander? He became Remington Steele for the night," Buffy smiled. "That actually helped a lot over the years, whenever we had to steal something to prevent the end of the world or whatever."
At that moment, Angel came into the room from his basement apartment, and he stopped short when he recognized the unexpected visitors. "Buffy? Willow, Oz? What are you guys doing here?"
"Hey, man. Will, I'm thinking that's our cue to leave," Oz commented, staring at Angel and then at his girlfriend.
"Good idea. Doyle, why don't you show us some of the sights of LA? We've only been here about a month, after all," Willow nodded, easily able to read the instant tension between Buffy and Angel, just like her boyfriend had.
Doyle shrugged. "There's this little Irish pub I know, if you guys are interested." He then called out, "Later, Angel!" as he, Willow and Oz left.
Once they were alone, Buffy started to fidget, not sure what to say. "So. Here you are, LA detective agency and all."
"Yeah. Different circumstances – you, Willow and Cordelia might have been calling me 'Charlie' right now. What with that Halloween a couple of years ago," Angel made a weak joke.
"So who would that make Xander, Bosley? Forget it. He's too good a thief to waste on a job like that," Buffy riposted in kind.
"Why are you here, Buffy?" Angel suddenly cut through to the heart of the matter.
"I'm not sure, to be honest," the Slayer admitted. "I just, I heard that Cordelia and that Doyle guy were working for you when we all ran into them today at that apartment-"
"Apartment? Has Cordelia found someplace to move in already? Good," Angel nodded. "I need my space around here."
"Cordelia's living with you now?" Miss Summers couldn't help the note of pure jealousy in her voice.
"Just for one night, and I slept on the couch," Angel smirked, finding his ex's feelings adorable. "Besides, Doyle's already staked his claim to that territory. So, how long are you in town for?"
"The next four years. I'm a student at UCLA now," Buffy admitted, noting his surprise at hearing that.
Just then, Xander and Cordelia came storming into the office in the middle of an intense screaming match. It was full-on, hard-core flying insults, back and forth. It was also embarrassing, considering how old they were, but when these two really got going, it often took the equivalent of an upcoming apocalypse to distract them from it.
Taking no notice of Buffy or Angel, Xander yelled furiously, "I can't believe you, Cordelia; you almost broke my leg when you kicked me like that! You are the nuttiest, the-the biggest fruitcake I've ever met!"
"And you, Xander Harris, are the most arrogant, self-centred, son of a-" Cordelia shouted back.
"You call me something like that, and I will kick you out of our apartment before you're even moved in!" Xander roared.
'Our apartment?' Angel mouthed at Buffy who just shrugged.
"I can't believe how obnoxious you've become ever since Graduation!!" Cordelia shrieked.
"Oh, hey, you've become WAY more obnoxious than me!" Xander fired back.
"Well, I'm just glad we never got back together after Prom!"
"Not half as glad as I am!"
"Oh, really?!" Cordelia sneered.
"REALLY!" Xander said before they stopped, staring at one another. Harris looked shocked and added, "Are you as turned on as I am right now?"
"Yeah!" Cordelia admitted, the old high school feelings having returned with a vengeance. Before doing something stupid like succumbing to the temptation of sucking Xander's tonsils out, the young woman quickly turned to Angel and said, "Good news! I found an apartment, so I can move out of here tomorrow."
"Xander, I thought you already got that apartment for yourself?" Buffy asked with an upraised eyebrow.
"Cordy kicked me and signed her name on the papers, while I was hopping around on one foot," Xander admitted. Then he sighed, accepting the inevitable before looking at Angel. "By the way, pal; you're not invited into the apartment – ever."
"Hey! I can invite whoever I want into my house!!" Cordelia said, looking mad.
"Oh, no! No way am I going to live in fear that this guy will come in and snack on my neck, if Angel suddenly gets a happy and goes completely psycho again," Xander glared at her. "What's the matter with you? A few months here in Los Angeles, and you've completely forgotten what Angelus is capable of?"
"XANDER!!" Buffy shouted, deeply offended by her friend's words.
"No, he's right," Angel admitted, to everyone's surprise.
"He is?" Cordelia asked in astonishment.
"There's an old saying about how familiarity breeds contempt, and Xander was the only one in Sunnydale never to succumb to that," the ensouled vampire noted. "He never once forgot what I was. Just about everyone else did, and people died because of that."
Angel turned to his ex and said, "It's one of the reasons I left, Buffy; I could feel Angelus getting closer and closer to the surface, whenever I was around you. That's why we shouldn't see each other socially, now that you're living here in this city. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it's going to have to be."
Upset, Buffy simply turned around and left the detective agency. Deep down she'd been hoping they could reconcile, but now all her hopes had been dashed all over again. ( I guess it really is over forever, huh? )
Xander saw her depart and said to Angel, "Well, you really have been working on your people skills, haven't you?"
"And you obviously haven't changed much," Angel replied in kind. "Why is it that no matter where I go, Xander, I can't seem to avoid running into you? I'm beginning to think it must be part of the soul curse Willow did a few years ago, a safety measure regarding the perfect happiness thing."
"Ha, ha," Harris scowled as Cordelia giggled helplessly. "Just don't think I'm going to become friends with you anytime soon, Overbite. Even if I won't be able to avoid you on occasion now that your secretary is my roommate, I'm not gonna be socializing with you unless there's an apocalypse happening."
"Fair enough," Angel admitted. "Just as long as you don't hurt Cordelia again like what happened with that rebar last year, that's fine with me."
Xander's glare was almost enough to incinerate the ensouled vampire, right on the spot.
***
An alley somewhere in Los Angeles, California
December 20th, 1999
A lot had happened over the last two months, some of it not exactly good.
Willow, Oz and Doyle had been attacked by a Kailiff demon named Griff as they'd left the Irish bar that day, and the half-demon seer had gotten killed; his gift of sight lost without being passed on to Cordelia, which mightily pissed off one of the higher beings up there.
Actually, perhaps it would be more accurate to say that that was just the beginning of the fallen Power getting completely pissed off, as Cordelia had gotten back together with her ex-boyfriend as well, by this point.
It had all started with the apartment they'd gotten, which had turned out to be haunted. Obviously, their old Sunnydale luck had followed them to the big city.
After a brief Charlie's Angels-style investigation by the girls, they'd discovered that the poltergeist was most likely Maude Pearson, the former owner of the place who'd died decades ago. The evil spirit had almost killed Cordelia, before Xander had saved her life; and during the attempted exorcism, Miss Chase had rediscovered her inner bitch and unleashed the ghost of Dennis Pearson, the son Maude had murdered, to deal with the bad guy.
There had been other incidents, such as Buffy almost getting shot by a group of overly-sensitive cops, and Oz almost getting killed by a Mohra demon. But it was when Angel had saved a bunch of half-demon refugees from a Nazi-esque cult called the Scourge, and Xander had saved everyone's life after unlocking the cargo ship doors just before a bomb had been about to go off, that Cordelia had finally realized how life was too short to hang onto the mistakes of the past – and she'd eventually moved into Xander's bedroom.
Right now, though? Buffy, Willow, Oz and Xander were at a crime scene, having discovered a dead girl with a cross carved onto her cheek.
"Vampire," the Slayer said angrily, checking out the bite marks on her neck. "Third one this week with this 'signature', too. Man, this guy is starting to piss me off!"
"I did some research to try to profile the vampire, but, uh, I didn't get far," Willow admitted. "Buffy, don't you think we ought to consult with Angel on this? He might know something about this so-called Pope killer."
Buffy waited for the automatic objection from Xander, but oddly, it never came. The young man was still examining the corpse, a frown on his features. So Miss Summers said, "Okay, let's go see him..." The howl of a police siren could suddenly be heard. "In fact, now might be a good time!"
So saying, the Scooby Gang left the murder scene before the cops could arrive. But when they arrived at Angel Investigations, the group saw Cordelia holding a cross up to keep Angel at bay. "What's going on here?" Harris demanded.
"Xander, you were absolutely right about not inviting this guy into our house!" Cordelia exclaimed. "He's been going around killing people!"
"WHAT?" Buffy refused to believe it without proof.
"Cordelia, I didn't say that. I said that I have no memory of actually doing any of the killings that have been reported in the news, it's just I've been having dreams about them every night lately."
"Oh. What sort of dreams?" Cordelia asked, as she lowered the cross and Xander quickly came over to her side.
"Killing dreams. They're always the same," Angel visibly swallowed. "I-I stalk those people, toy with them, then mark them with Angelus's old signature while they're still alive. And before they can die from their fear, I feed on them."
"Okay. So you've been having nightmares, that doesn't mean you-" Buffy started to say.
"They're not nightmares. I've enjoyed them," the ensouled vampire admitted.
"Oh," Willow said numbly.
"I gotta second that," Oz nodded.
"Look, Dead Boy, there's only one thing I want to know: did you do it, or didn't you? Because I never heard of a vampire sleepwalking," Xander said acidly.
"Vampires can't sleepwalk. Angel takes one step out the front door, and he'd, like, burst into flames!" Cordelia reminded her boyfriend.
"Unless it's happening during the pre-dawn hours. Which, according to the papers, is when all these murders took place," Buffy noted. She hated to say it, but her prior experiences with Angelus had taught her that she couldn't afford to simply hope for the best anymore.
Angel shrugged. "There's only one way to be sure."
***
3336 Channel Avenue, Los Angeles, California
December 22nd, 1999
Angel had quickly been cleared of suspicion, after being strapped down to his bed for the night and another murder had taken place. After yet another seriously disturbing dream, Angel had identified the killer as Penn: a 200-year-old Puritan vampire Angelus had sired back in the 18th century. Due to the physical proximity, the sire-childe bond had been strong enough for the undead detective to mystically 'see' what Penn had been doing lately.
The gang had started to research anything they could find on the soulless demon, and they'd discovered that this vampire hadn't changed his act in two centuries; namely, killing his human family over and over again. Thus, once they knew what they were looking for, Penn had been spotted canvassing his latest victim – and he had holed up in this abandoned warehouse with the Scoobies hot on his trail.
"Why does it always have to be warehouses?" Willow grumbled, as she and her friends spread out to look for the enemy. "I thought that that was just a Sunnydale thing."
"Gotta respect the classics, Will," Xander replied, cross and stake in hand.
"Thinking he's right," Oz nodded.
"Vampires and warehouses go together like a chicken and...another chicken," Buffy smirked, recalling a long-ago conversation with Giles. "Everyone keep an eye out, this guy could be-"
Suddenly a figure dropped through the floor above to land between them in a cloud of dust. Penn instantly grabbed Cordelia and said, "No closer, or I open up her carotid!"
"You do that, and guess where the first one goes before I stake your ass!" Xander shouted, aiming directly for Penn's crotch with his crossbow.
"You got one chance, vampire – let her go and I'll give you a five-second head start. Or else you and Mr. Pointy here are going to get very closely acquainted," the Slayer promised Penn.
"Slayer," Penn sneered, but still dragging Cordelia backwards.
"Slayee," Miss Summers replied, her Slayersense suddenly tingling. ( Wait a minute... )
"Hello, Penn," Angel greeted him as he dropped down out of the same hole which his childe had used, and headed towards the other vampire.
"Angelus! My God, it's been over a lifetime," Penn said in delight, not objecting to the other vampire's presence as Angel arrived alongside him. "I'm glad you're here – could you take care of this Slayer for me?"
"That's not why I came here," Angel replied, letting a stake slide down his sleeve into his palm.
Penn looked confused, even as he held Cordy tighter when she started to struggle. "Yeah? Then why are you here?"
"To kill you." Moving faster than the eye could see, Angel staked Penn in the back and he exploded into ashes.
"UGHH!" Cordelia coughed out the dust that she'd automatically inhaled in disgust. "Oh, God, I hope that stuff doesn't give me cancer..."
"Are you okay?" Xander looked very concerned for his girlfriend, grabbing and holding her tight, checking her for any injuries. "Honey, are you all right?"
"I'm fine. Just, just take me home," Cordelia suddenly sneezed, getting rid of the last of the dust. "I need some Midol, not to mention a long hot shower!"
( Well, thank God for that, ) Xander thought to himself as the relief washed over him. As he and Miss Chase left, Willow and Oz followed them; but Buffy stayed behind as she saw Angel staring at Penn's ashes.
"You okay?" Miss Summers asked the vampire carefully.
"Yeah, it's just..."
"What?"
"You saw the police files Xander somehow acquired – Boston, 1908. Los Angeles, both 1929 and 1963. Penn killed so many people because I taught him how to do it so well," Angel admitted. "You heard what he called me just now, right? Angelus. He had no doubts that that was who I was, he could still sense that I was his sire-"
"But that's not who you are, Angel. At least not anymore," Buffy insisted. "Yeah, Angelus is still in there, and that's why you dreamed those dreams. But that doesn't mean anything as far as I'm concerned; because your soul is also in there, and you should keep that in mind!"
Buffy paused. "Xander and I had a...a conversation about it once, I guess you could say. I wanted to know why the hell he was always so down on you all the time, and he said that when I looked at you all I saw was the soul of the man I fell in love with; but he saw the huge trail of bodies you've left behind you. So I told him that people can change, that people DO change-"
"Penn didn't," Angel interrupted, gesturing to the dust on the floor.
"He didn't qualify as people. You do," Buffy said dismissively. "People can change for the better, even though the monsters can't. Now let's get out of here, huh? I still have some studying to do, and you've got a business to run. Tomorrow's gonna be a brand new day for both of us."
Angel let her grab his arm and guide him away from the warehouse, wondering if his beloved Slayer would ever really change either.
***
Next: Story 30 - Necromantic twist
