Artemis Fowl: The Book of Ages

Her Rules


The Next Day

Captain Holly Short landed gently on the ground next to a large oak tree which stood beside a modest dirt path. The ground had just a few traces of tire tracks running down the path. Holly unshielded and her wings folded and clicked shut automatically as she looked around. The leaves of a few of the surrounding trees were starting to change color, even though most of them were still a bright green. Just down the path, a small house stood in the middle of a clearing.

The outside of the house was designed so that it looked like it was a real, old-fashioned log cabin, but Holly was fairly sure that the 'logs' were just decorative, and had little to do with the actual construction of the house. Still, the thought of it being a secluded little hideaway in the mountains of England bothered her more than it assured her.

She walked the remaining hundred yards or so to the main door of the cottage. Her wings would have been fine for that task, and she could have probably just landed right in front of the door, but for some reason, Holly just felt like walking.

There wasn't a car in sight. Curious.

The elf knocked twice on the tall wooden door and waited.

It took a bit more than half a minute for someone to open the door.

Holly looked upward, expecting to see Minerva Paradizo greeting her at the door. But it wasn't Minerva who opened the door. It was Artemis, and he looked a bit flushed.

The elf narrowed her eyes immediately.

"Hey Holly," greeted the boy with a slight smile, pulling the door aside to let the elf in. It was probably an improvement from a formal 'hello Captain,' but it was still obvious that Artemis' social skills weren't going anywhere fast.

"What took you so long?" she asked, the slight annoyance in her tone surprising her slightly.

"Oh, uh, that," stammered Artemis, muttering now, "well, Minerva's out, and I ah, forgot I had to open the door." He looked away. "Usually Butler or Juliet does it. It was a brief lapse on my part, my apologies."

The suspicion dropped from Holly's features. It was a stupid answer, but it made perfect sense, considering it was Artemis Fowl. He probably never had to answer doors himself before. It must have been quite the novel experience.

"Oh."

Artemis coughed into his fist.

"Minerva has to go to her shift with the volunteer ambulance service," said the boy quickly, changing the topic, "but as you're already here, I can show you what the plans were."

Holly nodded, somehow glad that she got here before Minerva came back. "Sure," she answered easily now.

As the elf stepped inside the house, she made sure to pause to check whether Artemis remembered to close the door. He did- but barely.

"We're leaving tonight," announced Fowl as he led Holly past the living room (which she thought was a little overdone for what was supposed to be a tiny country cottage). "We'll arrive in Kathmandu and proceed to the surface site of Shambhala in the morning."

As the pair arrived in Beau's bedroom, Holly immediately noticed the cutaway projection of a mountain. It was kind of hard not to notice it- it was floating above the C Cube on the desk and about two feet wide, after all.

The Captain didn't even bother asking how Artemis had gotten the schematics of what looked to be Shambhala's entire city layout. Whether or not Foaly had actually given them to him didn't seem to be an issue.

"She agreed that quickly?" Holly asked instead, still surprised despite the fact that she already knew about the planned trip several hours ago.

"Indeed, she did," agreed Artemis with a slight tone of skepticism, "She seemed all too eager to find out more about the demons and our timeline once she spoke to Nº1."

Holly's eyes narrowed as she looked again at the city plans. Minerva Paradizo and demons were never a good mix. If it weren't for the fact that the demon in question was Nº1, any creature who had been kidnapped by her would hardly have agreed to speak with her at all.

Artemis noticed the elf's expression and seemed to stare at her face for a little longer than absolutely necessary, as if observing her. Holly wondered if any part of her betrayed what she was feeling just the night before.

"I don't know why she has such an interest in them," Fowl added, "but it doesn't seem malicious."

"What if it's all a sham?" asked Holly quietly, "Joining the Humanes, helping Commander Root out- all of it?"

They both knew what the unspoken prize would be for the Minerva they once knew if she was truly just faking it all.

"We're in a bit too deep to worry about that at this point," said Artemis with a small frown, "but I've agreed to tell Minerva our side of the story on the way and she says she may do the same. An exchange of information, obviously- but information can more valuable than gold."

Holly didn't like this turn of events. The way Artemis had put the situation showed his criminal roots probably more than he had intended but it didn't seem like there were many people they could trust in this world at all. Putting their faith in Minerva Paradizo was more than a little unsettling to the elfin Captain.


Evening

Minerva got a brief chance to speak to a demon the previous night. She called it brief, but few other people would. It was brief though, because it even as it convinced her (somewhat, at least- a lot of it felt more surreal than anything else to her) that she was actually talking to a live demon, it made her want to ask more, and to say more.

Minerva carefully sidestepped many of the things she would have wanted to say. Maybe later Nº1 would know, but not now, she had decided.

For her, the day at the Manchester ambulance service served more as a way for her to clear her mind than anything else. The one call she had gotten involved a fairly mundane car accident downtown and she worked more or less automatically through it (the one middle-aged man who had been injured would recover quickly enough).

'But there are no mundane accidents,' she reminded herself quietly as she turned her car onto the dirt road that led to her temporary home.

'This Sean fellow and his odd friends are really turning out to be quite something', she decided.


"It's so nice to meet you properly, Captain," said Minerva with a smile as she bent down to shake Holly's hand. "Always a pleasure to see a time traveler," she added with humor in her voice. Whether or not it was sarcastic though, Holly honestly couldn't tell.

Instead of responding in kind, Holly simply looked the woman straight in the eye, giving her a piercing look with blue and hazel irises.

"Then you believe us?" she asked almost defiantly.

Minerva answered the elf's stare with a curious, but wary look.

"I haven't decided yet," she answered, "but I sincerely wish I could. If I do, you absolutely must tell me what being in a wormhole is like- all I get to stare at all day is numbers."

The way she said it made her sound like a housewife asking a friend about a cake recipe she had been having trouble with.

Minerva didn't comment further on the Captain's eyes- or much else for that matter. Instead, she took off her jacket and began making tea.

"We can leave for the airport in about an hour," she announced without turning around, "I don't suppose the Captain has much to pack, but why don't you go pick up a few outfits from my brother's wardrobe, Sean? I'm sure he won't miss them, and it'd probably be a good idea to be traveling in the Himalayas in something other than an Ike Behar dress shirt and jeans. We'll pick up more appropriate clothes along the way."

Holly glanced towards the Irish teen and saw him raise an eyebrow slightly before silently walking off. She quietly followed him. Leaning against the wall out of Minerva's hearing range as Artemis began pulling out articles of clothing, she quietly spoke.

"Why the sudden generosity?" she asked.

Artemis gave her a quick look and shrugged.

"Oh come on," urged the elf, "what ever happened to Mr. I-got-a-psyche-degree-while-in-diapers?"

The Irish teen rolled his eyes visibly and went back to picking clothes. It was only when he had a pale green sweater pressed against his chest to see if it would fit that he answered her question.

"I think she feels guilty," he said finally, but with a bit of uncertainty and none of the clinical tone that Holly would have expected.

Holly's brow furrowed and her bottom lip twisted slightly to one side.

"Minerva? Guilty?" she asked in a voice that had more than a little skepticism in it, "What makes you say that?"

"The laughs?" said Artemis, folding the sweater and throwing it into a bag, "They're not all as sincere as they sound."

He picked out a pair of pants and began folding them as well.

"She also told me- indirectly, at least," he continued, "that she once tried to stop the Hybras landing."

"What?" asked Holly, eyes wide now.

"That's what I initially thought too," Artemis said, sending Holly a little smile, "but I think there's quite a bit to this Minerva that we don't know."

The teen glanced towards the door as he pulled a jacket from the wardrobe.

"I do intend to find out what happened though."


Aboard a Learjet 60 XR- 45,000 feet above sea level

The Learjet 60 XR was designed for 8 to 10 passengers and a two person crew. The fact that there were only three people onboard (and one of which who clearly didn't have the weight to really count much towards the plane's capacity) and that they had climbed up to cruising altitude at a ridiculously fast pace for a plane this size disturbed Artemis' environmentalist side a little. Holly seemed to enjoy the takeoff though. It wasn't like she wasn't used to flying, but LEP-issue wings could only go so fast, and they didn't have comfortable plush chairs in the cabin (or even a cabin at all).

Artemis decided not to ruin the moment by telling her about carbon emissions from private jets.

Surprisingly, Minerva didn't call anybody at Heathrow to pilot the plane. She had apparently gotten a private pilot license while in her late teens and took the occasional international solo flight. And so, she was the one at the proverbial wheel.

The plane's PA system (why such a small plane was fitted with a PA system at all escaped Artemis) crackled to life as the pilot's voice floated into the passengers' cabin.

"Good evening lady and gentleman," came a friendly, professional-sounding voice, "and welcome to your nine-o'clock flight from London, England to Kathmandu, Nepal. If you'll kindly look out the window to your left and right, you will realize that there is absolutely nothing of interest in sight unless you can see through the cloud layer immediately beneath us. As such, it would be in your best interest to come forward to the cockpit to explain to your pilot precisely who the hell you are. Thank you, and have a nice flight."

Holly stared at the PA as it clicked silent.

"Brilliant. She should get her own show," she commented dryly.

Artemis suppressed a laugh and instead, got up.

"She has a point though. You can sleep if you want," he told the elf, "I'll… go explain."

"Oh no," said Holly, taking off her seat belt and getting up as well, "I think I'll come with you."


"That was an excellent takeoff," commented Artemis, "And you fly the plane yourself- very nice."

Artemis was, at the moment, sitting on the edge of the copilot's seat, his body tilted towards the woman he was talking to and his eyes scanning her face for any and every reaction to his words. Holly, who had insisted on coming with him, was sitting sideways on the large armrest of his chair, also facing Minerva.

Amazingly, Artemis had actually remembered to offer her the seat first, but she brushed him off. The boy couldn't tell why she would want to sit like she was (it didn't look all that comfortable and was probably against flight regulations), but he didn't say anything about it. The way Holly was sitting hid any of her reactions from Artemis, but he could have sworn he saw her crossed arms tense slightly at his last comment.

The woman shrugged.

"I prefer to do things on my own," she said nonchalantly, "the whole bodyguard, pilot, chauffeur, cook and maid thing really isn't for me."

Artemis thought he might have been able to guess why.

"But enough about my flying abilities," Minerva said suddenly, "I did call you up here for a reason."

The Irish teen didn't say anything immediately but rather looked out towards the dark, featureless sky in front of them.

"What do you know about Artemis Fowl?" began the boy carefully.

Minerva paused for a moment before answering, as if silently composing her response. She turned to stare at the Irish teen for a few seconds before looking back to her instruments.

"A brilliant inventor, head of his own energy company, son of the European crime lord, Artemis Fowl the First…"

Artemis bristled slightly at that, but consciously stopped himself from expressing too much.

"… though Junior hardly has any criminal connections- at least, none that anyone can trace back to him. I met him once- at an art exhibition in Madrid. He knew much more about art than I expected from a person in his position."

"What happened to his father?" asked Fowl, trying to keep tone within the range of detached curiosity.

"Well, at least we know you're not trying to impersonate Fowl," smirked Minerva, "But really, what rock have you been living under? Any idiot knows the story of Artemis Fowl the First."

"Let's assume I've been living under a particularly large and… media-proof rock…" responded Artemis softly.

The woman shrugged. "Kidnapped during a business venture in Russia; Mafiya job- very nasty."

'No surprise there…' thought Artemis.

"Artemis Junior actually mounted his own rescue mission," continued the blonde, "managed to get pretty close too, once he gave half the ransom. But then the Russians panicked at the last minute, shot Fowl Senior and ran with what they already got. Nobody ever recovered the man's body. It fell into the Bay of Kola and… well, I guess it's gone by now. The bay was about as radioactive the old-style fission chambers and nobody was stupid enough to try to recover anything from that nuclear cesspool."

"What did you think of him personally?"

Minerva shot him a look.

"Aren't you supposed to be the person telling me what's going on?" she snapped, "Just how much does Fowl have to do with this whole time traveling business anyway?"

Artemis heard Holly let out a barely-suppressed laugh.

"Please," implored the boy, "I'd like to hear your answer. I will tell you immediately afterwards."

Minerva didn't look towards him, but he saw her eyebrows rise just a little. Maybe it was Holly's response that made her finally answer.

"He is… an incredibly arrogant man," she said slowly, "but perhaps he is right to be. Other than that, I can't say too much."

'A measured answer,' noted Artemis, 'She's waiting for me to tell her how much he… well, I'm… involved until giving a real assessment.'

Artemis took a breath and saw Holly turn to look at him. He shrugged a little and mouthed the words "here goes nothing."

"My name is Artemis Fowl the Second," he said carefully, pronouncing each word delicately, "Artemis Senior was," he paused and corrected himself, "is my father."

Artemis thought he saw a surprised look come over Minerva's face, but it was too brief to tell whether or not he had just imagined it. He waited for a response, but the blonde didn't immediately give one. The thrum of the plane's engines seemed to get louder by the second.

Artemis forced himself to breathe normally, knowing that holding his breath for an answer wouldn't grant him any particular advantage. Holly remained silent, but from what he could see, she seemed to be boring her gaze into the side of Minerva's skull.

"Fowl told me something during that art exhibit," the woman said finally, looking at the Irish teen from the corner of her eye, "He hinted that he had seen a legendary piece of art before, one that very few people even know exists."

She didn't say any more, but simply waited for the boy to answer the unasked question.

"The Fairy Thief, an Impressionist piece by Pascal Herve," answered Artemis immediately. "It's likely in his possession," he added.

"Really now?" asked Minerva in a tone that made the boy think momentarily that the conversation was about to turn to his art collection.

"Fine," she said after a moment, "what we are going to do is this: I will sit here and fly this plane, and you two are going to have from here to Kathmandu to tell me exactly what is going on and convince me that I should be helping you. If I'm not convinced, I turn you over to Nepalese authorities when we land."

Artemis saw Holly's hand automatically go for her Neutrino and immediately reached out to grasp her shoulder.

"Oh, and Captain," continued Minerva casually, but with a slight edge to her voice that Artemis had never noticed before, "don't try for the gun. If you stun me, who will fly the plane?"

'I would,' thought Artemis instantly. Apparently, Holly knew too, as she once again made to unclasp her hip holster.

"Holly," he said, gripping her shoulder more tightly now, "let's… trust Minerva for now."

She turned back to him and he saw a bit of anger flash across her face.

"But why-" she began.

"Please," Artemis added, cutting her off.

He thought he saw the blonde smirk and gave her a hard look.

'Alright Minerva,' he thought quietly, 'we'll play by your rules. I hope you know I'll still beat you.'

Then he made his first move.

"As I've said, my name is Artemis Fowl the Second," he began, "and in my timeline, I'm a close friend of one Minerva Paradizo."