Set Fire to the Third Bar- Snow Patrol. Has to be my favorite right now. Fits well w/ chapter. Happy reading.
Chapter 29
(POV CHANGE) Katniss
I wake up with a headache and a sore shoulder. I'm terribly thirsty and I have no idea what time it is, or for how long I have been asleep. I sit up carefully, and then notice a plate and a bowl of water on the other side of my cell. I get up, and take the plates with me to sit against the wall. I know better than just to eat it, so I stir a finger in the mush. I examine it, and then eat just a little off my finger. If they put something in the food, I rather have eaten a small amount, than have eaten the whole thing and go into the effects of drugs or something. I wait a few minutes and then decide it's okay. I eat it quickly, and drink the water in the bowl.
The trackerjacker venom has worn off. I have nothing to do in this cell, so I'm left to have my thoughts run through my head. I tell myself that I'm not going to think how infelicitous my situation is. I'm only going to think what I can do to better my situation; to not go into a depression. They want me to become empty and motiveless, but I won't. I'll have to brace myself for whatever they plan to do, however bad it is. I'm still going to still be me when I come out of this, if I come out of this.
Stop thinking like that.
Their motive is for me to become empty, so that I will succumb to whatever they tell me. I'm not going to let myself. I'm searching my thoughts for something to hold on to, something to remember, or hope for, just to get me through this. I think for a long time. When I can't find an answer for my problem, I think of something else; what made me happy? The first thing that comes to my mind is when I saw my mother dancing at Finnick's and Annie's wedding. She looked happy, so I was happy. I think about collecting dandelions with Prim when we were young. When I was in the Hummingbird Room with Peeta and Prim, I can say I was happy. It's one of those times where I wasn't constantly worried about something. I was distracted with the moment. Peeta and I spoke normally for the first time in so long. Prim made it feel like being back in 12, before that Reaping. It felt like home.
I think about the Quarter Quell, when Finnick and I scared Peeta awake. I remember how hard we laughed even though we were still in such a disheartening place. I think about kissing Peeta for real for the first time, and then I think about the pearl.
I'm jumping around in my thoughts, and realize I'm smiling even though I'm in a prison cell. I start to feel movement inside me. Haven't heard from you for awhile. Since I got here, it hasn't moved till now. I realize I didn't say that finding out I was pregnant made me happy. Does it make me happy? I'm unsure. I just can't see the joy that comes with it at this moment.
I feel it push against my stomach. It hurts a little. It's like it pushing out with its tiny arms.
"Calm down," I whisper, but I don't really mean it. I sort of want it to keep moving. It's that good thing I was looking for, when everything else is so awful. It's one of those experiences in a pregnancy that a woman is supposed to get really excited about, but it does hurt. What do you do to calm babies? Sing lullabies, but I don't know if it works in this case. The baby is not even out yet, but I heard from somewhere that they can still hear you.
I clear my throat and start to sing in a hushed tone:
Deep in the meadow, under the willow
A bed of grass, a soft green pillow
Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes
And when again they open, the sun will rise.
Here it's safe, here it's warm
Here the daisies guard you from every harm
Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true
Here is the place where I love you...
I'm not sure if I'm singing to the baby or rather, myself. Either way, it feels like I have just lied. Safe? Not really, but this is what you tell children, that they're safe. Lies, I think, but that last line wasn't a lie.
I get that feeling in my throat, and my voice begins to break when I try to continue singing. My eyes water, but I stop my sorrowing and pull myself together. I pull my skirt over my knees and lay my head on them. I close my eyes and calm my breathing. I force myself not to think how hopeless this is.
A buzzing sound, the opening of heavy doors, and footsteps get me alert. They're coming to get me, again. The door slides open and two peacekeepers walk over to where I sit. They pull me up and put cuffs on my wrists. One pulls me by the cuffs, the other Peacekeeper walks behind me. We go into the elevator, go up a floor, and then enter the same plain room I'm questioned in. Snow is already seated in his usual spot.
"We have some news for you," Snow says ominously. The Peacekeepers place me in the chair and leave my cuffs on. I'm forced to see his sinister smile, and smell his rose. I'm beginning to feel nauseous.
"From your expression I'm guessing it's wonderful news," I say sarcastically.
"I wouldn't call it wonderful, but it had to be done. It was inevitable," he says. I sit still, waiting for him to continue. "We discovered the squad's whereabouts. Street surveillance captured that squad made up of your acquaintances. They fortuitously triggered a chain of pods, which in fallout killed a member or two. We were alerted, and took the opportunity to activate our own traps to finish them off." He leans just a bit closer, to make sure I hear him right. "Everyone in that squad is marked dead. I have Peacekeepers searching for their remains."
Dead? No, they can't be. Snow is lying again. "Lies," I mutter.
Snow frowns. "They're dead. We have the evidence."
"It's fake. They're not dead. They wouldn't be done away with, so easily."
He grimaces. "I'm going to give an official statement about the news. I suppose you should be there to give your supportive take on what happen. You'll say it had to be done for peace."
"Sure, I'll say whatever. You may be able to fool the rebels," I say.
He furrows his eyebrows. "You are fooling yourself, Katniss Everdeen. You are in denial, but you won't be when you see the footage," he states percussively. "Take Ms. Everdeen to the stylists. Make sure they cover those blemishes on her arms." These blemishes are actually scars from the poisonous gas, but he really has no concern about how they harm me, as long as it can be hidden.
"After made ready, take her to view the footage," he says. He directs his eyes at me. "You'll see for yourself." Then Snow departs and the Peacekeepers take me out of the room.
They're not dead. How can they be? Snow is just making this up to get me to fall apart. The televising will be a hoax, or at least the "proof" he has will be. We exit the elevator and reach the room for prep. It's the same emotionless stylists from last time.
"Over here," says the male stylists. I'm put on the platform again. "Behave well, or you'll be sedated."
I glare at him, and he scowls back to intimidate me. Fail. The female stylist grabs hold of one of my arms, and raises it up. "What are we going to do about this?" she says in her squealing accent.
"Don't worry, we have a dress to conceal that," he says. "We'll also conceal that bump with the corset. You're getting awfully big." I glare at him and spit on his suit. "Shit! You little-"
"Let's just do what we have to do," The woman says. "The sooner we're done, the better." The man nods, but he continues to scowl for the whole make over.
They cover the light scars on my face and the dark circles under my eyes. They wash my hair, dry it, and leave it down simply. When it comes to the corset, I make sure to hold in my breath to achieve a little more room, but when they tighten it, I exhale suddenly, and they tighten it even more. The dress is put over my head and pulled down. It's black, but this one has sleeves to cover my arms. I wouldn't want to appear as though I'm doing this against my will.
We go into one of Snow's private quarters. It's a study, with a desk, shelves, and bookcases, but there's a large screen on the wall. A cushioned seat is moved closer to the screen. They sit me down and leave the cuffs. "Watch it," commands the Peacekeeper. What else am I going to do?
I face the screen believing that whatever they have to show me is a hoax. The screen lights up and displays a street of the Capitol from an angle of a roof. I don't see anything, until a bomb detonates. Smoke clears slightly and I see Boggs. He lies on a pile of rubble and a small pool of blood is starting to form. His legs are gone. I'm beginning to feel sick.
A voice-over explains what's happening as the squad tries to regroup. I can't tell who is who. A second bomb goes off. There's yelling and shouting, and guns are being fired. The smoke clears and I start to recognize each of them. Finnick is trying to revive Messalla, Gale and Leeg are firing their guns to detonate bombs up ahead. It's a rudimentary attempt at mine sweeping. Then I notice the familiar blonde hair, shaggy and dark with ash. Oh no. Peeta. What is he doing there?
What makes it worse is that Peeta doesn't look like himself. He's in the middle of another paroxysm. Soldiers of the squad are trying to restrain him. My heart sinks when I see him like that. All that time we spent together, thinking that I might have helped him out of it…
He shoves Mitchell off of him. Mitchell lands on a stone, triggering a pod. A net sprouts out of a streetlight and encases him. He's instantly bloody. Gale tries to free him. Pollux and Homes grab hold of Peeta. The squad is failing at trying to take control over the chaos. They dart for escape into an apartment. I watch it all intently, until the wave of black substance blots out the cameras. The screen hums and then it shows Gale, alone on a street, trying to shoot through the cables that hold Mitchell aloft. Who is dead.
Coverage continues from the courtyard behind the apartment where they took shelter. Peacekeepers line the roof of the building across the street. Shells are launched into the apartments setting off a chain of explosions. It cuts to a live feed. A reporter stands with the apartment block burning in the background. Firefighters are trying to put out the fire. The showy reporter finally announces them dead, and the screen is turned off.
No, no, no. It can't be real, but it looks so irrefutable. Could they all be dead? Peeta, Gale, Johanna, Finnick, the film crew, Mitchell, Homes, Jackson, Leeg, Boggs: All dead? Gone, just like that. I don't know what to do. I feel like I've just been punched in the gut. The reality really starts to sink in. I'll never see them again; Finnick's smile, Johanna's sarcastic humor. No Gale to go hunting with. No more sleeping in Peeta's arms to warn off nightmares, or hearing him talk about painting sunsets. Peeta will never have the chance to see his baby. My stomach feels sick again.
A large Peacekeeper comes into the room. I can see he was expecting me to start bawling or something, but I can't. It's just so sudden. The Peacekeeper pushes me out of the room without a word. I just go along willingly, until I know what to do, or what to think.
We arrive at the set. I sit on the same white seat, with a bright light shining in my face. I can't see them behind the light, but I hear Snow asking about my reaction to the news. No reaction. He won't get anything out of me. I don't think I have to keep doing this anymore. I won't talk to be made their puppet.
"Well if she's not emotional, then that will keep the audience focused on the message. They won't be easily persuaded to feel sorry for her. If she acts like it didn't affect her, then the audience shouldn't react as negatively," says a director to Snow.
"Very well then, we'll continue what we had planned. Her lines will be given," says Snow.
"Yes, Mr. President."
Forget the freaking lines. I'm saying what I want. I'm also planning an attempt to escape. I just want to make an attempt, and if I fail, they'll have to kill me. If they plan to kill the baby, I'll find some way to be taken out first. I'll have to do something disruptive. I won't go quietly. I should warn them of Snow's second attempt at taking District 13. It would be like what Peeta did. They know I'm not really on the Capitol's side.
Cameras begin to televise Snow's statement. He congratulates the peacekeepers on a masterful job, honors them for ridding the remaining symbols of the rebellion. He predicts a tide change in the war, with the evidence of demoralized rebels and having a stronger offensive approach.
Then the screens flickers, it starts to display President Coin in 13. She introduces herself as the head of the rebellion. She speaks of the deceased team, and gives a persuasive sedition. While this is going on, Snow is shouting at the film crew. The cameras are pointed at me, and when Coin finishes, I'm shown on the screen. Snow is giving me a threatening look to not screw this up. Oh well.
"The rebel squad…" I look to Snow who's already losing his top. The crew waits for me to continue with frowns on their faces. "They didn't die in vain! We're still in this rebellion, and we're not going to give up!" Snow is furious, he's shouting to stop filming, but just before they are able to, I stand up and fling my shoe at Snow and the operator. Which it hits, I'm not sure. It's stalls enough time. "They plan to seize District 13! Assemble forces. Get ready!"
Before I can look for some sort of escape, the Peacekeepers rush to get me out of the room. I'm hit repeatedly on the back and shoulders with their nightsticks. I kneel on the ground from the impact, but they just pick me up again and drag me out of the room.
I'm back in the study. They leave, leaving my cuffs on, and lock the door. I pace around the room, searching for some sort of escape. None, there's nothing. The vent is too small and there are no windows. I look for anything I could use to defend myself, a weapon. I look through the desk, there's nothing, not even pens to stab them with. I look above a shelf, filled with pipes and framed photos and certificates. I search with my hands on the top shelves, and find nothing, but then I notice something sticking out from under the shelf on the floor. I pick it up. It's a small wooden stick that I indentify as a match. I smile with my discovery and then stick in my hair. I can't put it in my sleeve, or they'll find it.
The doors slam open, I turn around quickly. Snow walks in enraged, followed by Peacekeepers. "You gullible girl! You helped no one with your outburst; District 13 nor yourself. I don't even know where you got that information! Every action has consequences, and you'll be sure to be facing yours. Do realize what you have done? That was our only preponderating strategy left. They'll have to split their forces- Taking them out will just take more time, causing more casualties, more deaths on both sides. You are to blame for it."
"You think you'll simply win over? That it's just a matter of time before the rebellion is stopped? You're too confident, or you're the one that's gullible!" I shout.
"Quiet! You don't have any right to speak your opinion. It doesn't matter."
"If it didn't matter, I wouldn't be here, would I?" I counter. He's fuming. I see his pale, made-up face start to redden. It would be funny, if I wasn't at the edge of my life right now.
"We made a deal, and you broke it. You were hoping for an easy out, well that's not going to happen. You'll continue to work for us till the end of this. You're not leaving yet, but as consequence, that burden of yours will be terminated. It's of no use or importance to us," he says firmly. "Tomorrow evening, you'll have a scheduled abortion."
This wouldn't be the first time I broke a deal with a power hungry hag. He storms out of the room. The Peacekeepers grab hold of my arms, and walk me out back to my cell. I'm not going to be here for that appointment. No way in hell.
I'm left in the attire I was televised in. They didn't bother taking me back to the stylists. They took my remaining shoe, thinking I'll use it as weapon or something. I'm left in the black sleeved dress. I remove the corset with the dress still on, and I breathe in deeply, filling up my lungs for the amount of deprivation. I put my fingers in my hair, hoping desperately that the match didn't fall out on the way here. I search my hair and then see it drop to the ground. I pick it up and examine it.
I only got one shot at this.
Next chapter coming soon. Thanks for any feedback.
-cheezebuns
