A/N: So I noticed some people are getting confused by Eren and Armin's relationship within the story. I thought I had made it clear since chapter 2, but I guess not. ^^' So I'm just going to come out and say it so it's out there, and then you can make a decision of whether you want to continue on with this terrible story.

Yes, Eren and Armin are lovers. Well, I wouldn't call them "lovers" per say, but their relationship falls around that spectrum. This is not a brotherly relationship you're seeing despite the fact our original trio consider themselves family, but this is based off of their hardships. So yes, they are a thing. However, you've got to keep reading to find out what happens. ;3

-Misty

P.S. A big thanks to Lady Mari chan for being such an awesome beta! Imma get you something awesome in Japan!


Lost Cause

It's his job. Being in this special operation requires apathy, a cold heart, and dead eyes, making him just the man to do it. Of course this doesn't mean he likes it. However, when he runs into three young teens in the worst possible situation a life could lead, it turns out that he isn't as heartless as he once thought he was. Modern day AU: Officer Levi, Prostitute Eren. (Lots of trigger warnings. You're going to hate me so much for this fanfic.)

Rated M for adult themes, sexual content, adult language, violence and gore, child abuse, rape, drug abuse, oh so much more that I can't even list.

Main pairing: Riren. Other pairings with side pairings.

Anime: Shingeki No Kyojin (Attack on Titan)


Chapter 29: Gun and Badge


Levi wasn't looking forward to walking into that office. He wasn't looking forward to the odd, strange, or disgusted looks he would surely get, only if news had gotten around. He wasn't looking forward to meeting with Erwin, and he wasn't looking forward to setting his badge down for the last time.

Erwin was a man of business. He wouldn't blurt all of what happened out to everyone, would he? No, he wasn't that type of man, and he'd definitely want to keep the truth hidden. God forbid word of this got out. They'd all lose their jobs.

Levi sighed. The elevator doors opened, letting him out to walk down the now seemingly long corridor to the office. He wanted to turn back, but he knew he couldn't. Knowing that, he reinforced up the walls he usually held up and walked into the office, head high like he owned the world, though he knew better.

He wasn't greeted with looks of disgust or hate. Instead, everyone seemed to smile in his direction, friendly gestures or waves and nods towards him.

"Afternoon Captain!" Marlowe called from across the room, a box in his hands a filled to the brimming with belongings.

Belongings of his squad. Looking over to the desks, even the one Hitch currently occupied with her feet sitting on the open drawer, they had all been cleared. Everything from the paperwork to the photos of their families was gone, leaving behind only computers and phones

He hadn't seen those desks so empty in years. In fact, even six years ago, his squad, though they didn't belong to him at the time, sat there. The only newbies to come in were Petra and Ouluo, the youngest to come into the squad.

They had been too young to die.

"What are you doing here?" Hitch asked while looking up from the desk she sat at. "You're supposed to be home with Eren, aren't you?"

"Not for now." Levi answered. He could see their expressions changing with confusion, and he knew that their minds were trying to figure out the answers. "Where's Erwin? I need to speak to him."

"He's in his office with Hanji." Marlowe told him as he walked over.

"And boy is she pissed!" Hitch laughed as she tosses some papers into the desk.

"She's upset?" Levi asked. "What's wrong?"

"Don't know. Not my business." The curly haired woman said with a shrug.

"She walked in very angry." Marlowe explained softly, quietly, as if he didn't want to be heard. "They've been in there for half an hour screaming at each other."

Levi looked over to Erwin's private office, and even from across the room, he could hear them arguing.

"It's nasty. I wouldn't go in there if I were you." Hitch openly joked.

"I've got a death wish." Levi responded. Again, more odd looks were exchanged, but Levi ignored them in lieu of walking to Erwin's office. The closer he got, the more he could hear of their argument, and Hanji was really putting up a fight. In fact, most of the yelling was coming from her.

"I don't condone what he did! Levi slept with a victim and it was wrong, but what you've done to Eren is far worse than what he's done!" Levi leaned against the wall, listening to their argument with his arms crossed over his chest

So Hanji knew then. That must have meant that either Eren or Erwin broke the news to her. He couldn't imagine it being Erwin, because he wasn't the type to gossip. However, Eren was probably in tears to the point he couldn't even speak. He was probably so furious that he wouldn't say anything to anyone. Maybe it was a possibility that Erwin had spoken up, but only to Hanji. She would have needed to know why Eren was suddenly with her.

Or maybe Eren told Mikasa. His niece would have said something had she felt it important (Because she was more like her mother than she realized). Would she have spoken up about it though? Would she have said something the teen wouldn't want her to say?

He couldn't be sure who said what anymore.

"He can't stay in an environment-"

"Fuck environments! The only thing you did was take him out of something he considered a home with someone he trusts! He doesn't trust anyone else like he trusts Levi!"

Hanji wasn't the type of woman to curse, but when she got to a point of severe anger, which ever so rarely happened, it came out as easy as it was to breathe.

"They slept together!"

"And I already said it was wrong, but Eren can't stop crying! He's scared, Erwin! He's scared and miserable!"

Hearing about Eren's condition didn't bring him any relief. It didn't make him feel any better to know that the teen was falling apart, and he wasn't even there to make him feel better. He wanted to be there for him. To pick him up into his arms, hold him, and promise that everything would be okay. He couldn't though. This had nothing to do with him anymore.

He'd be lucky if he ever got to see him or Mikasa again.

"You took him away from the one person who broke through every built up wall and gained his trust! It doesn't matter about the case anymore! What you did was wrong, and you've done something far worse to him than Grisha had ever done!"

For a moment it fell silent within the room. At first Levi thought maybe they had caught on to his snooping, but that was until the office door slammed open with such blinding speed and fury that the older man had to move out of the way. He barely missed the, what would be, painful impact of the office door as Hanji stormed out of the room and out of the office all together, not a single word or glance given by her except for out of the room. The whole office went quiet, eyes following her until she disappeared, and even a little after that. When she was gone, eyes fell to the door she had just stormed from, some on Levi even to see if he knew anything. Levi simply ignored the stares he got and looked into the room.

Erwin was pacing by his desk, looking upset and out of sorts. Levi didn't see why he wouldn't be. It was very hard to get Hanji angry, but when she was, she was worse than any psychopath they had come across. That, and he had to fire someone he'd trusted for years. Levi was his best, and that was what he was. He was his best.

Now he wasn't.

Levi stepped into the room, and when the commander turned to continue pacing, he stopped at the sight of him. The frown the man had on his lips seemed to deepen, the furrows by his eyebrows becoming more intense. Levi looked down, his eyes hiding from Erwin's stare.

In all of their years of knowing each other, Levi had never looked down from the man. He always faced him head on with his eyes, never backing down, and now he was. Levi thought that he deserved it in a way. After all, what he did wasn't pardonable, and he knew it. He didn't deserve to look directly into the man's eyes.

To avoid that glare that was pushing him into the ground, Levi walked over to the man's desk and reached into his pocket. He pulled out his badge as requested and set it down on the desk beside a yellow folder. He then took his gun out from under the waistband of his pants and pulled the clip from it. When that was done, he set the gun on safety and put it beside his badge and the clip of bullets. With that and one last passing glance to his items, Levi turned to leave.

"Thank you for everything..." He muttered and grabbed at the door.

"Levi," Erwin spoke up, making the older man stop halfway out the door. Levi turned back in, but he kept his head down. "Shut the door and sit down." He commanded in a gruff tone.

That tone he only ever used when talking to criminals.

The older man did as told, no hesitation to follow the blonde's rules. He wasn't going to go against Erwin, though he didn't know what else the man wanted for him. He lost his job and he handed in his gun and badge. What was he forgetting? Or rather, what more did Erwin want from him?

"Yes sir..." He mumbled. He sat down in the chair in front of Erwin's desk, and in return, Erwin sat in his own chair. He set his elbows down on his desk, his fingers lacing together so he could lower his head down on his chin. This was something Levi had seen from the man, but that was only when he was interrogating criminals.

Was that what he was categorized as now? A criminal? He had been there once before, but he remembered not giving a shit let alone two about being one. Now, however, after spending years of getting himself high up and making himself worth something, he forgot how much being looked at like this disgusted him.

He was disgusted in himself.

"Alright," Erwin began, voice low and deadly to his ears. "I want you to tell me everything that happened last night. Every little detail. I want to know what happened that got you to sleep with an eighteen year old."

"You'll jeopardize the case." Levi spoke, looking up to Erwin's hands, but not his eyes.

"It's off the record." Erwin told him. Levi was skeptical about that, but he knew that Erwin wanted Grisha in jail just as much as he did. He didn't want to mess everything up.

"... Last night, Eren came into my room saying he couldn't sleep. He didn't want to be alone. Eren's been very... Childish for the last few days. I can understand why he's like that though. He doesn't need to be immortal and inhuman anymore." Levi began explaining, though he could tell he was babbling a bit.

He figured it must have been his nerves. That, and he had never been one good for words. He was trying to explain his thought process in hopes that Erwin would understand him better.

"So I let him lay down with me to help him sleep. I held onto him and just let him cry off all of his frustrations."

"What happened next?" His commander asked.

"Eren... He kissed me while I was talking to him. I told him no, because I knew what he was getting at, but he insisted."

"So you gave in just like that?"

"Of course not," Levi scoffed. "You're thinking too lowly of me, Erwin. I told Eren no, but he... He said he wanted to be clean. He said... That he was sick and tired of belonging to him, and he thought that sleeping with me could fix it. He wanted to feel like he didn't belong to them anymore, to Grisha."

One look up confirmed the man was still staring at him with a berating glare.

"I can understand where Eren is coming from. I mean, you know where I came from, so you know I can make that connection. I tried telling him that sleeping with me wasn't going to do anything, but he started crying, saying he couldn't take feeling so dirty, so disgusting. Erwin... I couldn't let that kid think that way about himself. Eren is too fucking important to think that way, especially when it wasn't his fault to begin with. He never did anything wrong, but he seemed to think that way."

"Is this something you used to wish for?" Erwin asked, his hands laying against his desk. "To be clean by someone else's doing?"

"... Why do you think I had Farlan in my life?" Levi asked and finally met his blue eyes. "I know where Eren comes from. It's disgusting and dirty and the most degrading feeling, and I know that I'm not the only one to ever think that way. Hanji has said so herself that people can get these kinds of crazy ideas."

"So you had sex with him to help him?"

"... Mhm." Levi hummed quietly. Erwin sighed to himself, his fingers beginning to rub at the bridge of his nose at the oncoming of a headache. "I think there's a difference in our mentality. You wouldn't understand where Eren and I come from unless you were there too."

"Can Hanji explain it in the same way?"

"Probably with some bigger words and a psychotic episode, yes."

"Okay..." Erwin mumbled. His hands pressed into the desk firmly, his body leaning forward in a serious posture, much like his expression. "So can you tell me that last night didn't mean anything to either of you?" He asked gravely.

"... No." Levi responded.

"You can't?"

"No, I can't. Last night meant something to both of us, probably a little more than I'd like to admit. It wasn't just sex. I wouldn't categorize it as making love, but it wasn't a simple fuck either." Levi explained, but that was a lie.

He had blatantly stated to the teen that they were making love. Telling Erwin the truth, however, would only deepen his grave.

"And that's it?"

"Unless you want me to give you every single detail, such as if we broke a sweat or that Eren can't hold his voice back, then yeah, that's it." Levi stood up and pushed his chair in. "So if that's everything, I'll leave you be."

"Levi," Erwin reprimanded. Levi barely suppressed a groan, his shoulders slumping over. What more did this man want from him?

"Yes...?" He asked and turned around. Erwin stood up and walked around his desk to face the man. Levi kept his eyes down again, but he couldn't help following Erwin's arm as it moved back to his desk, his hand picking up his badge and gun.

"You forgot this." Erwin said and held the items up to him. The older man's eyes darted up to look at Erwin, shocked and confused. He took the items back, but as he looked at them, he just couldn't figure out what the man was thinking.

"Erwin, what are you doing?" Levi questioned him with a look that said he had lost his mind.

"Giving you your things back." Erwin told him.

"Why...?" Levi asked. "Erwin, I know I broke the rules. I fucked up badly, and I don't deserve to keep this job."

"You're right about that, but you're also right when you say that I can't possibly know what you or Eren thought at those low points in your lives. I'm going to go over this more with Hanji, because it's something that needs to be discussed, but I'm not losing my best because he was human for a night."

Levi watched him closely, still trying to figure him out. The older man had always been trying to figure him out, but even to this day six years later, he hadn't come up with an answer. The words were there, but they didn't seem to make sense to him in his head, just like always.

"... You're too nice of a person, Erwin." Levi mumbled while putting his badge away in his pocket.

"This isn't going on without punishment though."

"I figured."

"You're off the case completely, and you're to hand over any and all notes taken during this investigation. You're going to be on probation, though I can't say for how long. I guess it'll be that way until I know I can trust you fully again." Erwin explained to him.

"I'll work hard to gain it back, sir." Levi muttered. Erwin put a hand on Levi's shoulder, giving the man a kind smile.

"I know you will, so I know it won't be long."

"So... What about Eren?" Levi asked quietly, like the topic of the teen was taboo to even speak up.

"He is still going to stay with Hanji. It's no longer a risk to have him and Mikasa together, but keeping him with you is an absolute no." Erwin said while walking around his desk. "And you can't have contact with him either. You're not allowed to contact him in any way, not even on the day we go to court."

"I understand." Levi said curtly and nodded his head.

"However..." Erwin began and the older man's frown deepened. "We'll pretend that my ruling was said tomorrow. For now I'm ordering you to go see him."

"Sir...?"

"What are you waiting for? Go see Eren. Hanji says he's losing his mind right now, so I'd be quick about it." The blond said while sitting down. He chuckled at the way Levi's mouth was open, his brain still trying to process the information that was coming at him too fast.

"... Uh... Y-Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Erwin." Levi said and tucked his gun back into his pants. "I won't mess up again."

"I know you won't."


A/N: This was a difficult chapter. It's been written for months (Almost a year), but when I first wrote it, Levi's squad hadn't been killed yet. Levi was originally talking to his squad, not Marlowe and Hitch, so I had to go through and reformat it to fit the timeline. ^^' Anyway, this will be the last chapter for a few weeks. I leave for Japan tomorrow, and I'll be there for a week. I hope to hear from you all soon though! Keep being awesome, and I'll see you all soon! ^^