oh noes! I'm like whimpering right now D; I feel so...sad

Chapter dedicated to Allers3, thank-you for helping me find my inner remorse.

Rowin's POV, sniff sniff ): during the chapter "stupid nuts" I think. reread "They where the victor" If you're confused.

The kid went down fast. An arrow to the shoulder was all it took, and a moment later his cannon was going off. I almost wanted to take a step forward, to make sure, but I knew better. There was a huge chance that there was another, that this kid was some decoy, a distraction. It seemed too obvious to be true.

I whipped around, remembering to string another arrow. Suddenly worried that maybe the decoy isn't here, that they might have already found Ember…

And it's true, partially, because there is nothing. And so the pain takes me by surprise.

It's not really sudden, I fall forward before my mind registers what's going on. And so I just manage to turn around, arrow griped in a way you might use a knife, but there's no time to pull one out now. And it's all too soon before the world goes blurry and explodes into darkness.

Water runs past my fingers, I twitch them in the current, and a moment later groan at the terrible thumping pain that pulses through my skull. I try to reach up with my fingers. No use. Other hand. Nothing. I'm pinned.

The world slowly blobs into focus. First it's the sky. All hazy blue and filled with bruised looking clouds. The tree tops come into recognition, the rock, and the water. I'm by the waterfall. I pull my arms up again, their bound. Somehow or another, I turn my gaze to look, but find myself staring into the eyes of the kid. The guy, it takes me a moment to realize he's dead. Not now, but that he really should be. I don't know if I want him dead, I cringe as a black haze swims over my vision. I struggle to stay awake. I force my eyes to focus, the kid smiles. I grapple the haze for a few more moments before I concour the sucking darkness that threatens to pull me under.

Tizen. That's the guys name. I'd say he's older than me, but something about his expression reminds me of a toddler. He grins. Such a creepy expression that the toddler comparison withers and dies in my mind. This is no kid.

He puts a deadly array of knives to the ground by his side, and leans forward. I strain my hands against the bonds that tie me down.

"hello there." Tizen greets. Like all sing-songy and weird that way. I stare up at him, unpleadingly. This is the hunger games, right now; I'm guessing his main personality trait to be something along the lines of cannibal.

I brace myself as he leans over to collect his "belongings" off the stony ground. I stretch my fingers forward, trying to grasp whatever might be near. My fingertips brush against a blade. I can't reach it right, the bonds are too tight, I wonder again how I could get out of them. One around my neck, holding my limbs to the ground, ten or so in total. I wonder if I could turn his attention away, get the knife or whatever by my fingers-

Pain. It comes fast this time, drowning out the throb of my skull. I clench my teeth together as sharp tingles reach up my hand. Tizen is there. He's not slow, the blade is in his hand. Well the handle that holds the blade.

He sits back and wipes the knife meticulously. I just hope that means his putting it away, and I hope he leaves- no. I don't want him to leave, because I realize what that might mean. If he, per say, stayed on the chain of island waterfalls… I close my eyes, trying not to think about what would happen to Ember if Tizen found her. The dull clink of an array of daggers accompanies my thoughts. I feel blood trickle across the ground.

I can see her still form behind my eyes. This is the hunger games, and I have already seen enough death in my life. Already had enough time to imagine the bodies of each and every one of my family members.

Layla swinging from mothers worn dress. Apple bursting from the door. Father in the yard, green eyes flashing smiles at his children.

Their bodies charred. Screaming. Layla gripping the hem of Mothers tattered dress. What if she were dead by then? I had always imagined Layla alone in the end. Fists pounding stubbornly by the dead bodies, not understanding why they wouldn't wake…

It was not what I had seen, I had seen the ruins. There were no bodies. No trace. But I was all too good at imagining. I could see the scene replay, over and over. I had dreamt of their last moments, terror, pain. I never forgave myself for not dying with them. Although now I wished that maybe I could give myself up now, in place another.

I opened my eyes to stare up at Tizen as he began. But my mind wasn't in the present. It was far away. Sometimes with Ember, we could have been happy. I knew only one of us could have ever won the games, I hoped she would survive, I hoped it would leave her conscience unmarked. It was a delicate conscience that she had. Although I admired her for the strength she showed on the outside. And so, the pain was bearable at first, the way the red slashes bloomed across my vision, I let myself drift… until the end.

The end. When you stop feeling. When you are helpless and everything comes back to you like a storm. Like the rain you always sang to come back another day. You know that someday, it will all come back.

That was when I saw her again. Limp at first. As if she were floating in nothingness. Blood sweeping around in dark tendrils. Staining the golden strands of hair that floated around her face. Eyes closed in peace. Serenity.

But in this vision she was gone. I wished I could disappear too. Until I almost got my wish.

I couldn't see anymore, even when I tried. Even when I fought to escape the bonds that long since stopped imprinting their feeling into my wrists.

Disorientation.

Fear.

Determination.

I had only my imagination to rely on. And in it, Ember woke. But beneath the knife that I was under now. I was sure I could stop it. Stop what was surely happening to her. I my mind, her eyes pleaded, they didn't cloud, they stayed focused on me. Almost as if she were right there. Just out of arms reach. And then the screaming began. Reality no longer existed. Just me and my imagination which became too clear. Inputs from the surrounding world only faintly drifting into my thoughts.

But she was in pain. Whimpering, wheezing, screaming. Just barely holding on. And I could do nothing. While I was floating here, feeling… nothing. Nothing anymore. I wanted to talk to her. I told her to hang tight. I told her it would all be alright. Someday, she would get out of this. Someday, I would be freed from this also. Someday, our outstretched hands would meet. Someday…someday…

Someday we would meet again. Under the darks of this soft black blanket. Under the pull of nothing.

.....................

BWAaaa! DX

since when do I right sadness? I don't even read tragedy. D=

I put that period on the very last line and practicaly burst into tears. No joke. It took a dot... D;

dead Dx

Noooooooooooo

ok, I did skip all the intensive gore, and in case you didn't get the whole getto with the teeth.... refer to reareading previous author note. Remember the teeth? no? well now do you understand why I skipped the gore?

*sniff sniff* ok.... Snowhiskers signing off.