CHAPTER 29
I remained motionless for just a moment, chest heaving and my entire body quivering. The areas on my face where Fili's moustache braids rested just a moment ago still burned, tingly and bereft. He readjusted his grip on me, hands under my bottom, lifting me closer into his embrace.
He kept on arm under me, and the other one wrapped around my back, resting in between my shoulder blades, fingertips pressed firmly into my skin.
I tightened my legs around him and pulled his face back into mine. I'd waited for this, for too damn long. And now I had no idea how to stop.
It was long, slow, hot and deep. He let out the tiniest moan, moving the hand beneath me up over my hip and up under my breast, almost deliberately careful to come as close to those sensitive areas as he could without actually touching them, before joining his hands behind me and crushing me in a hug. I sighed, relishing the warmth, relishing him.
I couldn't even remember why we were on this quest, and I didn't care. He was finally wrapped around me, just like I'd wanted, and for the first time in a long time my mind was deliciously empty and fuzzy.
A long moment later, he pulled back and we grinned ridiculously at each other. I laughed lightly before saying, 'well, that was worth the wait.'
Fili was all dimpled and pink-faced, and I'd never seen him so carefree as in that moment. They were rare moments for him, then and now.
'Yes.' He said simply, before adding, 'the rest of the company will be quite relieved. Kili especially. They've been waiting since Rivendell.'
I stared, puzzled. 'Why Rivendell?' I couldn't remember anything that significant happening between us when we were there.
'Because that's where I braided your hair.' He said. He was clearly a bit confused as to why he had to clarify that.
I continued to stare, eyebrow furrowed, still not comprehending.
He could tell I had no idea what he was talking about. Smiling softly, eyes cast downwards, he said, 'it is our way of asking…asking you to choose me.' He seemed bashful, and his face went pink again.
'Choose you for what?'
'Marriage.'
Er, what?
He said the word as though it was completely inconsequential, but nevertheless I recognised that this was him laying his soul completely bare in front of me. It shocked me, even more than it shocked me to hear that it was the lady that chose the man, and not the other way round. I honestly expected the dwarven courting process to be rather misogynistic, just like the dark ages of Earth.
For the first time, I felt insanely grateful that I came to Middle Earth as a dwarf. Mahal, you're the bomb-diggity.
Fili continued to glance at me nervously, obviously waiting for my reaction.
My brain kept ticking over. I couldn't think of anything to say yet – I was still processing.
He braided my hair as a sign he wanted to marry me. And everyone bloody saw that, and I was completely clueless about what it meant. Oh my god. No wonder the company started being so nice to me after that. Everything was beginning to make sense…
Fili cut off my internal monologue. 'Bonnie?'
He lifted me by the ass-cheeks (oh, my stomach octopus!) and placed me on the ground, finally letting me go. I was a teensy bit relieved at that – Ringil was still fastened to my belt and had started jutting uncomfortably into my ribs, and I didn't really care for two long swords pressed against susceptible places.
Oh, no, the innuendo. Stop it!
Poor Fili. I felt bad for keeping him in the lurch for that time. He looked a bit horrified by then. Of course I wanted to marry the little bugger – I'd established that within myself back in Rivendell, too, when I first felt that even if I could go back home, I wouldn't want to.
'Yes, sorry. Fili, I choose you.' I said dramatically, making a sweeping motion like I was bowling and letting out a silly little giggle.
Too much?
He watched, a little bemused but clearly quite happy. He gripped my shoulders and placed his forehead on mine once again. 'Thankyou, ghivashel-uh.'
I'd never heard him speak Khuzdul before. Low, gravelly and hot. 'What does that mean?' I asked, quite breathless.
'My treasure of all treasures.'
Wow, um. I blinked a couple of times. Shake it off, Bonnie, before you faint, I told myself.
I took a deep breath, smiled, and he smiled back. 'I'm curious, Fili. What would happen if I didn't want to marry you?'
He shrugged. 'If I can't marry the one I want, I won't marry at all.'
Jesus H. Christ. I couldn't help but feel a little indignant at that odd-sounding statement, like a reversal of the emotional blackmail that so many women are subjected to: 'if I can't have you, no-one can'. It seemed rather backward, on some level.
'Um, right-o.' I couldn't think of anything else to say.
He smiled, and changed the subject. 'Your braids are a mess. Shall I redo them?'
We settled on the ground of our cell, me with my back to him sitting between his legs, resting my forearms and hands on his thighs. He had removed his armour and his big leather coat, since it was fairly warm in the depths of Mirkwood. He now wore just his boots, trousers and brown tunic, and I could feel the outline of his muscles beneath my hands. It made my palms all sweaty.
I felt very at-peace as he re-braided my hair, despite having just been thrown in the dungeons for Mahal knows how long, after an epically prickly encounter with our elvish frenemies. This time, he placed one of his own beads on one of my braids. He didn't tell me what it meant, and I didn't ask. I didn't need to – it was a token of his affection, something to tell everyone else that I was his.
I wondered if the elves had noticed our bond out in the wood, and had therefore put us in the same cell.
We didn't speak much after that. I lay in Fili's arms, feeling completely blissed out and more than a little turned on by the muscled form of him. As the day wore on, he continued to kiss me intermittently, and we listened to the irritable chatter of the other dwarrows, who clearly cared more about the situation than we did. Fuck all we could do about it, might as well enjoy ourselves while we're stuck here, right?
Fili called out to Kili later, who was in the adjacent cell. 'Kili, are you all right?'
The other Durin brother sounded as grumpy as Thorin. 'Yes. Are you?'
'Y-yes.' Fili said back with a laugh. I snorted loudly.
'Is Bonnie in there with you?' He asked quickly, now far more interested than he was a moment earlier.
'Yes.' Fili said again, not even close to being able to disguise the happiness in his voice.
'Mahal!' Kili almost shouted, gleeful. 'It's happened, hasn't it? It's happened!'
Fili and I stayed dead silent. I pressed my lips together, waiting for it…
'Yes! Yes! Oh finally, it's about time, you two! It's happened!' He hollered, loudly. 'Welcome to the Durin family, Bonnie Dunlap. I always wanted a sister.'
Fili grinned in the direction of Kili's voice, and I felt my face heating up. A lot of whooping and words of congratulations filtered down and across to us from the other cells, something for the others to focus on and be happy about in the most unhappy of circumstances. Even Thorin, with a smile in his voice, said 'Mahal bless you both.'
Oh my god, I'm going to cry.
Props to the online neo-Khuzdul dictionary for the help.
I don't know whether to write smut or not - I've never done it! Perhaps a one-shot separate to the main story, in any case not yet, you'll have to stay tuned ;) Thoughts?
