Song Suggestion: "Take It All Away" by Red
Chapter Twenty Seven
"I'm Breaking, I Can't Do This On My Own"
I gripped the wheel ever so tightly. Acting as if the wheel was controlling my life, not just the car. I had unspoken words to say to every one at this point. I wanted to tell Fitz how much I hated him. I wanted to tell KC that I wanted our friendship back. I wanted to tell Clare that I'm in love with her, but I was so mad at her for leaving me. I wanted so many things, but what I had. I was unhappy with the life I was provided with. I hated all of it. Every last bit
I could feel my foot pressing down on the pedal too aggressively, I was over the speeding limit - but it didn't bother me. Crashing was the least of my worries at this point. I heard my phone vibrating; I grabbed it, pressed talk, and put it up to my ear. Clare's voice filled my ears -
"Where are you?" Clare questioned me
"Why do you care?" I rudely responded, "You never cared - I was just another boy-toy for you to mess with in high school. You stuck with me until things got too rough; then you left me"
"Eli, I left you because you scared me. You were acting like you were crazy"
"But you acted like you loved me just as much as I loved you"
"I did" I could hear the tears begin to fall out of her eyes, as her voice turned in to a raspy tone "You pushed me away"
"You never tried!"
"I did, every day! I based my entire life off of your happiness and your stability"
"Stop talking to me like I'm crazy!" I yelled, with so much anger in my voice, "I was stable - I wasn't 'losing my mind', I was protecting myself. I kept trying and trying to protect myself from Fitz, when all along.. I should've been protecting myself from you"
"You don't mean that" She sounded so heart-broken, "One minute you're in love with me, the next you hate my guts"
"You're messing with my head!" I yelled, "I can't take it Clare. I can't sit around and watch you associate yourself with Fitz and KC. I just can't"
"I'll stop - I won't talk to Fitz or KC" She told me "And me and you will have space to ourselves, we'll take a month or longer to clear our heads and figure things out"
"How 'bout I just figure things out for us now?" I pressed the pedal down so incredibly hard that Morty immediately took off speeding.
"Eli" Clare yelled my name "Eli!"
"I love you" I spoke those words to her, before closing my eyes - continuing to speed
As I felt the impact of the crash
-Clare's POV-
I paced back and forth. The white walls blinding me, as I could hear my shoes clicking step after step. The tears streamed down my face as if it was nothing. I couldn't stop crying, I'd been crying for hours. Hours and hours.
The clock struck 1:23 AM. I glanced around the room, for once recognizing my surroundings. I had failed to do so before - I was too distracted, too much in shock. I was too scared.
His parents were seated, holding hands -so tightly that their knuckles were white. Mrs. Goldsworthy cried tears after tears; Jack stared forward, with the blankest stare - as if he was too heartbroken to move.
Then there was me - I paced back and forth, I was shaking, my hair was in a mess of curls, my mascara drizzled down my face - I was broken. I've never had this empty of a feeling inside me before. I felt like some one had taken every thing out of me. I felt like I was nothing
I looked down at my phone, in order to check the time - 1:25 AM. Time passed fastly, but at the same time - it seemed as if it was taking forever. I wanted to hear the doctor's voice. I needed to be informed on Eli's condition. I needed Eli.
I've never realized how much he meant to me. I care more for him then I care for myself. I need him right now - I need him forever. He's the only person to ever truly care for me. I can't lose him
Suddenly, a woman approached us.
"Hello, I'm Doctor Harrison. You're the parents of Elijah Goldsworthy?" Immediately, Jack and Eli's mom stood up - awaiting to see the news the doctor had to share with us. My heart stopped
"I've been operating on your son all night" She continued to speak
And I listened
The next chapter is the last chapter :(
