"Howl's Love Advice"
Chapter 29: Situation
Calcifer stared up at the impressive sight that was Suliman Corp.
"The things I do for that guy…" he muttered.
Unlike Howl, Calcifer didn't mind the structure of this multi-faceted business and how everyone seemed to know what to do. If only he could take a smidgen of this work environment and bring it to his own workplace.
The moment he mosied inside, he caught a guy staring at him.
"What? Never seen an Alberian before?" Calcifer demanded. The guy instantly paled and apologized before scurrying off.
Calcifer snickered. He knew the dude was probably just eyeing his tropical-patterned shirt. Drawing attention to his foreign characteristics - bright red hair, bronze skin, and amber eyes - just happened to be a fun way of making people mind their own business.
"Hey, lady, can you tell me how to get to Red Floor?" Calcifer leaned backwards to ask some passing gal in a pantsuit.
She stopped and gave him a once-over, one of those, "You're cute, but you're about as important to me as a piece of seaweed right now" looks.
Calcifer threw his palms into the air. "Got it. Elevator then."
Or not, he thought upon seeing the traffic. The common stairway looked pretty clogged, too. There's gotta be… ah. There they are.
Emergency stairwells. Boy, had he seen his share of those back in his street days. He didn't care to linger with this errand anyways.
As soon as Calcifer entered the stairwell, his instinct made him freeze.
Voices.
Maybe nothin', he thought, quietly closing the door behind him. Two distinct voices: a man and a woman. Calcifer grinned. Ooh, office drama. Then a third, male voice joined in.
Puzzled, Calcifer crept up a few steps to listen.
The woman was saying something he couldn't quite hear, but one of the men clearly answered her, "It wasn't very nice of you to back out on us like that."
"If you weren't going to do it, you should have just told us. You didn't make us look good in front of our supervisor," said the other guy.
"Well imagine that," Calcifer heard the gal answer clearly - and very dryly - this time. "Workers slack off, and the boss gets angry."
A moment of silence. Calcifer frowned.
"She's actually pretty cute for a floor mouse," remarked one of the guys.
"You know, I think I saw a sign on the bulletin board about a new secretary who sleeps around," added the other dude. "Maybe we can get a crack at her..."
"Leave me alone!" the woman snapped.
"Haha, hey William, look. She's even cuter when she's scared."
Calcifer was already on the move. When he arrived at the landing, those two scumbags had the woman backed into a corner.
Calcifer loudly cleared his throat and propped a hand on his hip. The men whirled around.
One of the guys, the blondie, looked him up and down. "Hey, do you mind? We're busy here."
Calcifer sighed. "Hard, ain't it? Dealing with all of that sexual frustration."
The guy scowled. "What?"
Calcifer shrugged. "I get it. Nobody wants to be with two loudmouths. I'll give ya some advice." He leaned forward. He lowered his voice until he whispered, "It's best to start where you're actually wanted."
Boy.
Did that piss them off!
Jaws tensed. Fists curled.
Calcifer hadn't planned on ruining his clean streak today, but eh.
Sometimes you find a chick cornered in a stairwell.
