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Total Drama © PurpleBandit3000 (In my dreams)

The real credit goes to Fresh TV Inc. & Teletoon


Total Drama Redemption

Day Twenty Seven (27)

"You have three hours. Your time starts… now! ESSAYS, MAGGOTS! CAN YOU WRITE THEM!?"

Okay, I swear this man screams everything. Does he ever talk normally? How is his throat not sore?

Never did I think that writing could be so intense.

I had written a lot of essays in high school. Our English teacher used to make us write one every other week.

And I hated it. I hated writing almost as much as I hated sports and socializing.

It was boring as hell, my hand would hurt at the end and I would gain nothing out of it.

I was thinking about writing some bullcrap about how Chef was the best person ever. Most of my school essays were bull anyway.

Chef, you are really awesome. I like your cooking and you are the best- okay stop.

Gag! Seriously? Was I really doing this?

How the hell does this relate to the army anyway?

I can't bring myself to do this. I'm not sucking up to Chef Asshat.

There was no way that I was praising Chef. Not even a shitload of false praise like everyone else was going to do.

I observed the teens around me. Tyler, Harold and Heather had already started. Katie was thinking about what to write, as was Geoff.

Gwen was also deep in thought whereas Duncan was just sitting calmly. It was like he already had this thing in the bag.

Trent was scribbling something onto his paper. I tried to sneak a peek.

"No copying!" Chef yelled. "I catch you again and you will be disqualified!"

And there goes that idea.

I could just sleep.

During most of the other challenges, I had been frustrated after having being awoken so early and was extremely tired.

Perhaps ironically, I couldn't sleep during this challenge even if I wanted too.

Haha. Too bad I'm wide awake.

Thank you, brain, for proving my point.

I had a pencil in hand and a paper in front of me. Writing three-hundred words was no big deal. Writing three-hundred good words about Chef? That's pretty hard.

Maybe I should doodle on my paper. No, I had to be different.

Because I couldn't go to sleep and I couldn't talk or copy, I decided to actually do the flippin' challenge.

An idea crossed my mind. I'll write an essay. Not like Chef wants, but still an essay nonetheless.

I bet all the other people here think my essay will be the best, that it will be filled with big and complicated words. Boy, will they be in for a surprise.

Half an hour had passed, so I decided that it was time to get to work.

I first began planning my essay, trying to recall my thoughts. It's usually a good idea to plan first instead of immediately writing down whatever comes to mind. This way, you won't have to go back and add in an important point later on.

Once I had gathered my thoughts, I began writing them down.

I was probably going to get kicked out after this task, so I might as well go out with a bang.

At one point, I thought I should stop this foolishness and actually suck up to Chef. There was still an hour left.

Nah.

I finished my essay and sat for the remainder of the time.

"It's three o'clock! Time's up maggots!" Chef yelled.

most of the faces looked the same as they were during the Big Sleep. Some guys were extremely tired, but not me.

Most of us were done, but Harold was scrambling to finish his essay.

He was still writing when Chef picked up his paper.

"Gosh!" The nerd yelled in frustration.

Chef noticed that Trent and Tyler had dozed off.

"You two slackers are out!" Chef barked, banging on the table with his fist.

Chef picked up Duncan's paper. The criminal had a smug smile on his face, so Chef decided to read it.

"I love Master Chief Hatchet. Because he is very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very… this is just once sentence with five pages of 'verys' in between!"

"It's three hundred words exactly." Duncan replied. "You can count them if you want."

I tried doing something similar for an essay in fifth grade. Let's just say it didn't end well.

Chef read Gwen's essay next, then Heather's. He followed it up by reading Harold's, which had a lot of long words in them that sounded good but actually meant bad things.

"I feel an immeasurable amount of chagrin in your presence and believe that you should be defenestrated."

Haha, good one, Harold.

He then read mine.

"Dear Master Chief Hatchet,

I accept the fact that we have to sacrifice a whole night in this Main Lodge as our challenge for whatever we did wrong, but I think you're crazy to make us write an essay on how much we love you.

You see us as you want to see us… in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a bookworm… and a jock… and a Goth… and a queen bee… and a musician… and a surfer… and a party animal… and a loudmouth… and a criminal.

Does that answer your question?

Sincerely yours,

The Total Drama Club."

Chef immediately started going all apeshit over me.

I was 100% sure he didn't get the reference.

"You didn't even do the challenge, and for that, you're gone!" Chef said.

"Finally!" I said.

"Nice one." Duncan said to me.

Heather was glaring daggers at me, but what the hell could she do anyway?

"The rest of you, report to the playing field now!" Chef yelled.

"Uh, missed a spot there, General." Duncan snarked.

"Boy! Do you want to run fifty laps around this camp right now?"

"I could. But I bet you can't."

Chef was infuriated.

"It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's butt and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress!"

"You're not the only one who watches war movies, Chef." Duncan said. "Let's try to be a little more original next time, shall we?"

Chef gritted his teeth. Even his insults had failed to faze the green-haired punk.

"Let's just go to the next challenge. You kids these days, always talking back to your elders." He muttered.

Tyler and Trent went off to the cabins to sleep.

I still wasn't tired even after this task.

Therefore, I decided to stay and watch the rest of the challenge, intrigued by what would happen next.

Chef led the eight remaining campers to the next part of the challenge.

It was an obstacle course, complete with mud, walls, rope swings, tires and axes.

It was now 3:30 in the night, or early morning. I like to think that the next day doesn't start until 6 AM.

"You will all run this course until you can all complete it in under one minute. Am I making myself clear!?"

"Crystal." Duncan answered back.

Boy am I glad I dropped out in the previous part.

"Go maggots, go!"

They all took off. Gwen, Duncan and Geoff leaped over the wall easily. Bridgette, Heather, Katie and Leshawna needed some more time.

Heather and Katie easily went through the tires, but it wasn't so easy for Gwen, who slipped up a bit.

Meanwhile on the axes, Geoff and Leshawna got muddy but still crept through. Gwen and Katie were on the ropes. Not figuratively, but literally.

Katie slipped and fell to the mud while Gwen finished.

"Just in time, Gothy." Chef said, looking at his stopwatch. "The rest of you, keep going until you finish in under a minute!"

Gwen had already finished the whole course whereas Harold had just climbed over the wall. The lanky nerd face-planted to the ground and coughed up mud.

"Uh, General Crazy," Duncan said coming over to him. "We've got a situation here."

"Too much mud." Harold wheezed

"Ring the bell and report to the Infirmary. Your Tour of Duty is finished."

"Poor guy." Duncan said unsympathetically.

"Back on the course, soldiers. Now! One false move and I'll be on you like stink on a boot-wagon."

"I look forward to it, sir." Duncan replied.

Katie once again climbed the wall. Geoff squeezed through the tires. Heather had somehow tangled herself on the ropes. Haha.

Leshawna was passing through the axes when she started sinking in the mud.

"Fallen soldier, I salute you." Duncan said moving past her.

The punk was stopped by Chef- err, Master Chief.

"You just brought yourself twenty more pushups."

"Thank you." Duncan said cheerfully.

Chef was irate. He looked like his head was going to explode off his shoulders. WTF-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Noah, what does the scouter say about his rage level?

IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAND!

"One night solitary confinement in the boathouse." Chef said.

Everyone gasped except Duncan.

"Big deal." He said. "How scary can it be?"

During the day, the boathouse isn't so scary. But nighttime? Oh no, nighttime was so much different.

Cody would have peed his pants, but I was sure Duncan could handle it.

He would be pretty bored, though. Sucks for him.

With Harold out due to being injured and Duncan out due to being a troll, there were now three people for us and two for them.

Geoff finished next.

Heather also finished.

So that left Leshawna and Katie. Chef said that the next person to finish would be moving on, but the other one would not.

Katie finished easily and Leshawna was gone.

I hadn't seen Harold anywhere so I guess he went to bed.

I checked my watch. It was 4:00.

"It's time for a break, campers." Chef said.

We all went back to our cabins. Why was Duncan acting like such an ass, anyway?

I entered the cabin and saw Trent eating some chocolate.

"Did Cody leave some of those here?" I asked him.

"Cody? No, it's Duncan. He suddenly just knocked on the door and gave me a handful of them. He distributed them to the other campers as well."

I went outside to see that Leshawna, Gwen and Lindsay were all eating cookies.

"I still don't think we should trust that brat." Heather said. "He's pretending to be friendly with us so he can gain an advantage for his team."

"He's giving us some of his food. We should be thankful he's sharing it with us." Gwen argued.

"Hey Noah, you want one?" Trent asked, handing me a chocolate-chip cookie.

I took it. After making sure there were no nuts, I ate it.

Oh man this was so good.

"You put peanut butter on my pillow!?" Harold screamed from inside the Bass boy's cabin.

I could hear Geoff and Duncan laughing.

I'm pretty sure this food wasn't Duncan's. He stole it from Chef's fridge if I recall correctly.

I do recall for sure that this was the episode where Duncan and Courtney hook up, and then Harold gets Courtney out through illegal ways as an act of revenge.

But none of that would happen this time around.

"Attention remaining boot camp troops!" Chef shouted over the loudspeaker.

"The next evolution of your training begins tomorrow morning at O-700 hours."

"What are we, Pokemon?" Harold asked.

"And if I catch the sucker that took my dessert, your butt is mine!"

Chef brought a chill through the whole camp with that statement.

We had about two and a half hours left, so we decided to get some rest.

There were only five people left: Heather, Gwen, Geoff, Bridgette and Katie.

I still couldn't sleep. Too much was going on in my mind right now.

"Hey Trent."

He grumbled. The dude had already gone to sleep.

I lay down in bed and read a book.

-X-

Beep! Beep! Beep!

My alarm sounded. The next challenge was going to start.

"Attention campers! Get your butts down to the campgrounds for the next challenge!"

Right on schedule.

Everyone went over to Chef. The people who were already out wanted to see what would happen next.

Except for Duncan. He was in the outhouse.

"Why has Chip suddenly turned big and black?" Lindsay asked us.

Ignoring the question, Master Chief Hatchet spoke.

"Your final task is to hang upside down from this tree for as long as you can." He motioned to a big tree behind him.

"The last one hanging will win the challenge for their whole team."

"Alright! Hanging from trees! Let's do this!" Tyler screamed.

"Um, Tyler. You're kinda out of the challenge already."

"Watching people hang from trees. Not as awesome, but still cool I guess." The jock said.

"Can Duncan come back?" Geoff pleaded with Chef. "He didn't screw up in any of the challenges."

"Sorry cowboy, but that delinquent needs to be taught a lesson." Chef replied back. "Now let's start this task!"

"I bet Gwen loves hanging from trees. It's a common thing among vampires." Heather said.

"Actually, vampires are-"

"Shut up Harold!" Everyone yelled.

Geoff, Katie and Bridgette hung upside down from one branch of the tree while Heather and Gwen went on the other.

"Hanging on a tree with four chicks? This is so cool dudes!" Geoff yelled.

Things were silent for a while.

"I see you guys are just… hanging around." Trent said.

"High-five, guys. C'mon, don't leave me… hanging." Said Leshawna.

"Once this challenge is done, want to come to our cabin and… hang out?" Geoff asked.

"Sorry about last night over the phone." Gwen said. "I… hung up on you."

"You maggots better shut the heck up or I will personally hang you." Chef said.

"HAHA!" Tyler laughed. "Oh wait, that wasn't a joke."

No it wasn't, Tyler. No it wasn't.

Things went quiet after that. Chef left us for an hour and then came back.

"Ah, I see you're all still here." He said.

"What you are experiencing is an ancient form of torture. By now the blood has begun rushing to your head."

"It's probably filled up Heather's head given how empty it is." Gwen said.

"Oh shut it Weird Goth Girl."

Nice comeback.

"The next stage is nausea, followed by dizziness and a flushed appearance. As the blood begins to move to your eyes, you may experience fainting spells."

This detailed description wasn't helping Katie in the slightest as she fell down from the tree and began to vomit.

"Katie!" Bridgette said, jumping from the tree. She realized the mistake she had made.

"Oops. Sorry."

"I expected more from you, soldier." Chef said to Katie.

"Whatever. I think you need to take a chill-pill." Katie replied.

That left everyone shocked.

"Go Geoff!" Bridgette said, trying to bring us back to the challenge.

"No worries babe, I got this." Geoff said back.

"Good luck Gothy." Heather said, getting down from the tree.

"Seriously? You're just leaving me here?" Gwen asked.

"I had to make it fair." Heather said in response to our angry looks.

"So it's down to cowboy and Goth girl."

"You got this Gwen?" Trent asked her.

"Oh yeah. I could hang here all day." Gwen replied confidently.

"Rock on sister! I live for the head-rush." Geoff said.

Ten minutes had passed.

"It feels so… good." Geoff fell to the ground.

The daredevil may love thrills, but this challenge had just been too much for him.

The Screaming Gophers had won again. Leshawna and Trent ran over to Gwen and lifted her up.

"Gwen. Congratulations soldier. I'd go to war with you anytime." Chef said.

She'd kick way more ass than you, that's for sure.

"I'll keep that in mind when choosing my career." Gwen replied, somewhat disturbed.

"You do that, soldier! You do that." Chef saluted the girl.

We carried Gwen off happily.

"And as for you Fish-heads." Chef said, turning to the Bass. "One of you suckas is going to get sent out."

I was going to follow the rest of the Gophers back to camp, but then I stopped when I heard Katie bawling. Okay, I knew they had lost the challenge but what the heck was she crying for anyway?

The rest of the Bass ran up to her to see what was wrong.

It had struck me that the Killer Bass had been acting very different for this entire challenge. Duncan had talked back to Chef on multiple occasions, they had continued to pick on Harold, and Katie had started crying more and more.

It almost seemed as if we were having it better than them.

I knew that I shouldn't care, but what the hell was going on over there? Was Duncan picking on Katie or something?

Whatever it was, it wasn't really my place. Something was going to go down tonight. Who would be getting the boot?

Let's just hope Harold doesn't tamper with the votes again and get Duncan or Geoff kicked off.

I went back to camp.

"Where were you?" Heather asked me when I got back.

"I disappeared to a magical universe full of rainbows and butterflies only to arrive back here to find the She-devil standing before me." I replied, walking onwards.

That shut her up.

I went into my cabin.

"It feels so empty in here without Cody and Owen, doesn't it?" Trent asked me.

"Yep. But not Justin though."

"He wouldn't say anything anyway."

"Agreed. So how are things going with you and Gwen?"

"It's going pretty well. She's a really cool girl. I'm thankful to Cody for what he did."

"Yeah."

"You really miss the guy, don't you?"

"I'm trying to get over it."

"I miss him too. Not as much as you, but still."

"At least you're still here."

"That, I am."

Unfortunately, one person would not be here much longer.

We were going to find out who.

The Killer Bass had come back from their elimination ceremony.

There was Bridgette, Duncan, Geoff, Harold and Tyler.

Katie was gone.

"She was really sad after being away from Sadie for so long. She requested us all to vote her off." Bridgette explained to the other Gophers and me.

"Aw. Poor thing." Leshawna said.

"Chris said that this was the first time that the voting was unanimous." Bridgette added.

"Well, I don't know about you guys but I'm beat." Duncan said, heading off to bed.

We all went our separate ways after that.

Once again, we had more members.

I can't even begin to imagine what Katie was feeling. I had never had a best friend for more than two years.

I guess they're not really my best friends then, are they?

I am absolutely positively unarguably infinitely sure that the voting went like this:

Bridgette – Katie

Duncan - Katie

Geoff – Katie

Harold - Katie

Katie - Katie

Tyler - Katie

Total: Katie (6)

Eliminated: Katie

And this time, sleep actually came.

Hey Beavis, he said "came"


Yeah so that's episode 12 for you. Was it good, okay or downright awful? Reviews are appreciated but not required.

Suckas Sent Out:

Screaming Gophers: Beth, Cody, Izzy, Justin, Owen

Killer Bass: Katie, DJ, Courtney, Sadie, Eva, Ezekiel