I see sun…Maybe the smoke has gone away with the guns….
"Daddy, Mommy, watch me, watch me, watch me, watch me!"
"We see you, Jack-y."
"Be careful!"
Jack nods as he carefully swings his body forward to reach the next bar. Perry feels Jordan go tense.
"Its not like this is his first time on the monkey bars, you know."
She glares at him.
"Shut up."
Dr. Cox snorts and goes back to watching Jack, who's almost at the other end of the structure. Its funny that Jordan still worries that their son will kill himself on the playground, but at least its not as bad as it once was. No more football helmets and padding for Jack at least.
"I made it! I made it, I made it!"
Jack runs back to them, cheeks flushed, and arms spread out. Dr. Cox laughs.
"Good job, Jack!"
"Mommy did you see? Did you? I made it all the way without falling!"
"That's great Jack."
Their son nods and plops down in front of Jordan.
"Can I have juice?"
"Sure."
While Jordan rummages through the bag for a box of juice, Dr. Cox watches Jack turn his attention to Sammy, who is happily playing with his rattle in the stroller. Smiling, Jack kneels in front of Sam and sticks out his tongue. Sammy giggles and reaches out to Jack, rattle forgotten. Grinning, Jack continues making faces at him. Perry gulps and looks away, focusing on Jenny who's trying to stand.
A month. Its been a month since…well, since his Newbie died. The hospital was more or less back to normal, save for the fact that people kept asking about naming a ward or something after JD and dear God he was not gonna get misty eyed here out in public. He wasn't. Grunting, he smiles at Jenny, who is with his help, standing. It won't be long until she's ready to take her first steps. In fact, there's a video camera by his side at the very moment. Just in case.
"Here's your juice, Jack."
"Mhmm? Oh thanks."
Sighing, Dr. Cox gently bounces Jenny. She smiles at him.
"Da!"
Perry grins and drops a small kiss on her cheek.
"Of course her first word would be dad. Just like Jack's. Never mind that I'm the one who changes her diapers, feeds her, dresses her--"
"Hey! I changed her diaper this morning!"
Jordan rolls her eyes.
"Because I was changing Sam at the time and Jenny here was screaming bloody murder."
Scoffing, Perry opens his mouth to retaliate when he feels a small body slam into him. Startled, he turns around and nearly groans.
"Hi Izzy."
"Hi!"
Frowning, Dr. Cox looks up. Turk doesn't even glace at him, just goes straight to Sammy. As usual. Carla smiles at Perry in apology, and sits down in the middle of him and Jordan.
"Hi Perry, Jordan."
"Carla."
Perry watches Turk cradle Sam, a huge grin on his face.
"Hey! How's my mini vanilla bear?"
Sam burbles at him and kicks. Turk laughs and cuddles him closer, his eyes darting all over Sam. After a minute or two, his eyes meet Dr. Cox's.
"Sammy's been doing ok right? Not too fussy or anything, right? He's ok?"
Jordan scowls at him. Carla shakes her head.
"He's perfectly healthy, Ghandi. Nothing wrong with him."
Turk sighs.
"Ok. Just….just making sure."
"Baby, Sammy's fine."
"Believe it or not, I KNOW how to take care of a kid."
Turk flushes but nods. Perry looks at Carla, who's biting her lip. Jordan just shakes her head and scoots close to him, arms reaching for Jenny. His daughter whines at being handed over to her mother, but quickly settles down when Jordan pops a pacifier in her mouth.
"So have you two heard from Stick yet?"
Carla shudders.
"Not really. I mean…she called, to say that she arrived ok…but that's it."
Jordan nods but says nothing. Perry grunts and crosses his arms. In all honesty, he never, ne-hee-ever, in a million years, thought that Elliot would run. Hell, he expected her to be dropping by his place at least once a day to see Sammy, as Turk had been doing. He was pretty sure he'd have to physically force her out of his apartment, while trying to make sure she didn't kidnap Sam or something. Instead, she ran far, far, away.
"Where is she now?"
"Still in Maine," Carla pauses, "With her brother."
Jordan scrunches up her nose.
"Barry?"
"No, Bradley."
Dr. Cox wonders if she'll ever come back, and for a moment, he's furious with her. How dare she? For crying out loud its not as if she's the only one suffering. Its not as if Carla and Turk wouldn't be there to hold her hand or whatever. Its not as if he wouldn't have let her see Sammy either.
"Mooommmy! Push me on the swings!"
"Alright, ok."
Jordan hands Jenny back to him and takes Jack's hand. Perry watches them go. He wishes Jack had asked him, because he really, REALLY doesn't want to be alone with Carla and Turk. Not again. Well, with Carla really, because Turk is so absorbed with Sam that he isn't paying attention to anyone else; and Dr. Cox is reminded as to why Sam is living with him and not Gandhi.
"So…" Carla slides closer to him, her eyes on Izzy, "how have you been?"
"…Fine."
"Oh?"
"Yes."
Carla hums and edges closer, eyes still on Izzy who is happily playing(or trying to) with Jenny. Dr. Cox moans. He recognizes that mhmmm.
"She took it really hard, Perry. You can't blame her for that can you?"
Dr. Cox growls, but says nothing. He has a feeling that if he were to open his mouth, an argument would break out, and he really didn't feel like fighting. Not now, anyways. Maybe tomorrow.
"She'll come around, you'll see. It'll….she just needs to grieve," Carla sighs, "Its not just JD she lost."
"And yet she's not here…"
Silence. Perry cringes but doesn't turn around. Instead, he helps Jenny stand on his lap, watching as his daughter and Izzy babble back and forth. Turk is talking to Sammy about Izzy and how they'll set up play dates real soon. Dr. Cox rolls his eyes and smirks. Funny how Sam will be spending a lot more time with Jenny than Izzy.
Carla moves until she's sitting next to him, arms loosely crossed, her gaze on Jenny.
"How are the kids coping?"
Perry glares at her before shrugging his shoulders.
"Jenny's not really old enough to know what's going on. As long as someone is paying attention to her, she's fine."
Sighing, Dr. Cox looks up towards the swings, were Jack is trying to convince Jordan to push him harder.
"Jack's ok. Still gets sad on some days, but overall ok," he chuckles, "he likes having a little brother. Say's he's gonna teach him how to play football and cars."
"That's nice."
"Baby, Sam feels a little warm to me."
Gritting, his teeth, Perry turns around. Turk is starring, somewhat panicky, down at Sam who seems ready to fall asleep.
"Does he feel warm? I think he feels warm."
Frowning, Carla gently lays a hand on Sammy's forehead. She replaces her hand with her lips and shakes her head.
"Turk, he's fine. Its just warm out here. He's ok."
"He's drowsy though, I mean, he's falling asleep! Should he be? Didn't he already have his nap--"
"For God's sake Ghandi, sometimes I wonder how in the world you made it through medical school!" Perry looks down at his watch," Three in the afternoon" he mutters "Sam and Jenny usually have a nap right around this time, so yes, he should be falling asleep!"
Turk frowns at him.
"Look, I'm just trying to help--"
"I know how to take care of a child!"
"Hey, hey, hey…come on now, none of that."
Perry watches Carla lay a hand on her husbands shoulder, a small smile on her face.
"Turk, Sammy's just a little tired. He's ok."
Blushing, Turk nods and shoulders hunched, he looks back down at the baby in his arms as Carla reaches for Izzy. Perry cradles Jenny close as she too, starts to yawn and close her eyes, but he keeps his gaze set on Turk. There is still shadows under the surgeons eyes, and he's lost a bit of weight. He rarely smiles, and all in all tends to look like a little boy who's just been told the world isn't full of faerie dust and rainbows. It frustrates Dr. Cox sometimes, but he has yet to say anything.
Sighing, he looks over at the swings, where Jack is laughing as he urges Jordan to push him higher, and faster, until he can fly. Jordan just shakes her head, and even from his spot on the blanket, Perry is sure she is telling Jack to hold on unless he wants to be grounded for a week. Smirking, he looks down at his daughter, who's is very close to nodding off in his arms. Gingerly, he stands.
"I think its time to go home. Put Sam and Jen down for their nap."
Carefully, he settles his daughter into her car seat and waits for Turk to do the same with Sam. Hesitantly, the surgeon lays Sammy down in his own seat, and carefully straps him in, hands lingering on Sam's legs.
"Do-do you guys need a baby-sitter? Must be hard, you know, having three kids especially two babies. Me and Carla would be happy do baby sit. Isn't that right baby?"
Perry ignores Turk and looks up at Carla, a frown on his face. He knows Turk isn't trying to be nice, just trying to find a way to get more time with Sam--even if it meant adding Jack and Jenny into the mix. Carla just looks at him, a sad look on her face, and smiles.
"I wouldn't mind," her eyes drift over to Sammy, "It be ok."
Dr. Cox stands and grimaces.
"I'll talk to Jordan."
"Talk to me about what?"
"Ghandi here offered to baby-sit."
She looks at Turk, eyes wide.
"When?"
Turk shrugs, "Whenever."
Jordan frowns, and Perry doesn't miss the way her eyes dart to Sammy. Turk isn't exactly subtle.
"Guess we'll have to set a date night then, huh Per-per?"
Ignoring Jordan, Dr. Cox carefully picks up the car seats and starts to walk over to the car, Jack on his heels.
"Daddy, I wanna stay! How come we gotta go?"
"Jen and Sam are tired, Jack-y. They need their nap."
He can hear Jack pouting.
"That's not fair! I wanna stay."
Perry turns around slightly, eyebrows raised.
"Tell you what. After we put your sister and Sam down for a nap, we'll watch a movie together."
His son smiles.
"Really?!"
"You betcha."
Jack squeals.
"Can we watch 'Finding Nemo'? I wanna see the birds!"
Wincing, Dr. Cox nods. "Sure kid."
Soon, he was opening the car door and settling his daughter, who didn't seem to pleased at being disturbed from her almost nap. As Perry sooths her, Turk comes up from behind and picks up the seat carrying Sam.
"I'll settle him in for you."
Dr. Cox grunts but doesn't say anything. Before long, both babies are settled, and Jenny had stopped fussing and gone back to sleep. Turk was still at Sam's side, his hands petting the sleeping boy. Perry coughs to get his attention.
"We need to go."
Reluctantly, Turk closes the door and goes to stand next to him and Carla, who's holding a somewhat drowsy looking Izzy. Apparently, its her nap time as well. Smiling, Carla places a small kiss on Perry's cheek and then on Jack who giggles and wipes at the lip gloss residue.
"Call us when you set up a date night."
Before he can answer, Jordan speaks.
"Oh, we'll be calling. Would be nice to spend a couple of hours away from the little terrors."
Laughing, Carla gives waves them good-bye, and pulls a unwilling Turk away from the car.
"Well, hop in. You gotta put the kids down."
Perry raises an eyebrow.
"I have to put the kids down?"
Jordan nods as she turns on the car.
"Its been your turn for a couple of weeks now," she scoffs, "You know Jenny settles quicker if you're the one tucking her in."
He shrugs and leans back into his seat, listening to Jack's near silent singing. It doesn't take long to reach the apartment, and soon, he's quietly setting down Jenny in her crib, a smile on his face. Carefully, he runs a hand through her curls, and down her face. No medical emergencies yet. No late milestones. So far so good. Sighing he turns and eyes the crib on his right. Licking his lips, he quickly goes to the open door of the nursery, and looks down and up the hallway.
Slowly, he moves towards Sam's crib, eyes darting to the door to make sure Jordan won't sneak up on him. When he reaches it, Dr. Cox takes a deep breath and looks down.
Sammy is twitching lightly in his sleep, which Perry has come to realize is normal for him. He strokes a hand through Sam's hair and cheek, much like he did with Jenny and his chest tightens. The kid shouldn't be here. He should be at "home" with JD, or with Elliot. Not here. Not with Jordan and him.
"And yet here you are…"
Groaning, he tugs at his curls and closes his eyes. Sometimes….sometimes he wonders WHY he said yes so easily. Why he allowed Sam to move in with them to basically become his SON; but then he looks down and Sammy is smiling or laughing, or just staring at him with those big bambi eyes and he looks SO MUCH like JD that his mind shuts up. It should worry him but it doesn't it. Ok, so maybe it does kind of worry him but not enough. Not nearly enough.
"Daddy?"
Dr. Cox startles at the sound of Jack's voice, but he quickly recovers. He turns and grins.
"Hey Jack," he whispers, "ready to go see that movie?"
Jack nods and reaches out to grab his fathers arm. Perry lets himself be led away. At the door, he lets Jack run ahead and lets his eyes settle upon Sam again. Dr. Cox takes in a big breath and slowly, quietly closes the nursery door and goes to the living room, where Jack is searching for the DVD.
Just another day in this new life.
A/N-So I have about 5-6 chapters done...and yea, this fic? Will be HUGE. There will probably be 20 more chapters to come...holy cheese. Next chapter will be from Jordans POV--to see how's she's coping with trying to raise JD's son....but yes. Huge fic will be huge.
