~~Summer Dance Of Passion~~
~~Bella~~
~(The Next Morning)~
"Bella, can I talk to you for a minute?" mum had interrupted my good reading time but the day had been quiet, too quiet for my own comfort and it was only a matter of time before she came around plucked up the courage to tell me all about what she thinks about my boyfriend. I didn't know then when I looked up at her from my book whether she had already spoken to Emmett or not about Rose but, I was preparing myself inwardly for this discussion.
"Yes sure mum, come in" I said adjusting my legs and crossing them underneath me, putting my book behind me and watching her walk over to me slowly and climb on the end of my bed. "What's up?" I asked pretending not to know where this conversation was going because mum suddenly looked nervous which made me nervous.
"I came here to talk about Jasper-"
"Okay, what about him?"
"After what happened last night, and your father mentioned that he and Jasper had a little talk...Well...-"
"Mum, just tell me!"
"Your father and I are happy that he and you are together"
Whoa, seriously? Is she having me on?
"Yes you're surprised and you have every right to be, my darling. We have not been the best parents to you not just this summer but recently in our home lives and having you tell us some home truths helped the opinion to be swayed...Bella, the strength you showed when sticking up to the both of us honestly shocked me to the core...Never had I seen my Bella answer back or express such passion for her own opinion and situation in life. There is every reason as to why the person you love should be protected and now, we can both see why"
"Mum..I didn't mean to be out of line-"
"Don't apologise, please Bell...If anything I need to...Being in love is such a confusing feeling at first and as your mum, I stepped away thinking that you can forget about it because this is the summer and chances are much to all of our upset...Jasper may never see us all again but, like any person persuaded to walk away you stayed and rightly so...Jasper loves you, that much is certain more to your dad – he told me that he didn't think anyone was going to love his little girl as much as him. Jasper has proved him wrong"
"I love him, mum"
"I know, baby...We should have seen it, sooner...I want only the best for you and I have gone about it the complete wrong way...Pushing you away from us-"
"Mum...I know that Jasper and I may never see each other again but, having only a short amount of time left with him...You need to let me spend some time with him-"
"As long as you keep safe and be your usual sensible self then there is nothing wrong with that...The only love I have had in my entire life is your dad and he is the man I married...Having another summer love so powerful is something I cannot relate to and embrace it, Bella that's all I can say to you"
"Be prepared for me to be very upset when we go-"
"Don't worry your father and I will be here...Jasper will not be leaving you for any other reason apart from the fact that we all have to go back home and so...It won't be anyone's fault it's just one of those things"
"So...You really like him?"
"I do...It was stupid to not give him a chance and, I'd like an opportunity sometime to apologise to him from my own back-"
"Jasper respects you...Believe me, I am not saying this because defending him has become a habit but the first thing he ever said to me after my first argument with dad was 'they're your parents and they are protecting you'"
"He is a wise man...It's unfair that he hasn't had the same parental guidance but, he seemed like he has come through it all very well..That takes strength"
"He does have strength...Lots of people have taken him the wrong way or made a judgement about him but he is so beautiful, mum and he makes me feel like there is no one else in the world who can ever be more special than me!"
"Bella can you tell me the truth when I ask you this?"
"Of course what is it?"
"Have you been 'intimate' with one another?"
I should have known that mum was going to ask me this question...Jasper and I had not been together long admittedly but at the same time, my virginity was mine to lose and who I gave it to was my choice and right from the very beginning I wanted my first time to be with someone who I loved unconditionally and who I could trust to show the most sensitive parts of my body and break away my self-conscious opinion to and give them everything that I am. Jasper Hale is that man...The man about three things I was absolutely certain...One he was the love of my life, two there was a part of me and I didn't know how dominant that part might be that wanted to stay with him forever and third he loved me back in return.
"Yes" I replied to my mum, confidently...Nothing she said was going to make me regret asking Jasper to make love to me because it was the most beautiful night of my life and a night I will never forget for as long as I live. "We were careful, we both were careful and we both wanted it"
"I should have guessed...You're old enough and I am glad that you had that experience with someone who you felt entirely comfortable with and never did I have any doubt that you were going to be like Emmett and lose it for the sake of getting a better 'rep'"
"Thanks...Is dad going to be angry?"
"He probably will be at first, I mean the thought of you doing those things with another person is never what he wants, he wants you to keep on believing that you and Emmett were made by the stork but perhaps leave it from him unless he asks"
"Thanks, you're probably right"
"Anyway...That was all I came to say, really...Emmett is out with Rose and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me to lunch"
"Oh mum, thanks but I was just going to stay here and have a rest from all the drama"
"Of course, your father and I will go out...Do me a favour and just make sure that the living room is tidy for me won't you?"
"Sure, mum"
"I love you, Bella"
"I love you too, mum" I replied pulling her into a hug. A much new-found respect radiating from me to her because of her admittance of the wrong she had done and also her final acceptance of my Jasper Hale. Smiling and fighting away the tears of pure relief threatening to pour from my eyes.
With a stroke to my cheek "I'm so proud of you, Bella" mum added standing up from the bed and walking out of my room. That was the first time in such a long time that she had ever said that she was proud of me and I had changed from the girl who had come to this hotel at the beginning of my summer break...I was not going back the same person and for once I could hand on heart say that I liked who I am.
Glancing behind me at the book, I shook my head and stepped off of the bed the sound of the front door closing ringing through the house for a moment and, when the coast was clear...I skipped down the stairs and began to hum in the silence as I stepped into the living room and started to gather a few empty glasses and tidy up a few little areas, it was not a big job and I was not a person to refuse to help tidying up anyway and mum knew that.
"Bella?"
I turned on the spot and found dad in the doorway...He gave me a small smile and I frowned, not meaning to look so confused as to why he was here.
"Dad...I thought you were going out with mum-"
"I am going to, but I needed to come and say how sorry I am about the way I have treated you and Jasper these past weeks-"
"Honestly there is no need-"
"There is...Listen to me, Bella...You're growing up but the way you stood up to me in defence for the man you...Care so much about shows me that I am no longer staring at my little girl but more so of a young woman"
"Thanks, dad"
"Can you forgive me, Bella...Can you forgive your mother and I?"
"Sure...Just listen to me next time when I am pouring my heart out to you and needing to tell you the truth about what is going on in my heart...This is all very confusing because Jasper is probably going to be separated from me and I need my parents...I know I am not an adult, yet but I know what I want...I want Jasper"
"I know, sweetheart...I am sorry"
"I forgive you, dad"
I closed the distance between us and he wrapped his arms around me crushing me to his chest...The two of us hadn't hugged since coming on the trip and dad needed it as much as me...He wasn't an emotional man but everything was said when he hugged me and rested his chin on my head...Dad was not an expresser instead letting the actions speak his feelings.
"I am going to lunch...Are you sure you don't want to come?"
"Yes, dad I am fine here"
"Okay, see you soon" dad released me and kissed my forehead and walked out of the room...My day was going to be quiet and I did have a choice to spend the time I had whilst my parents were out to lunch to sit here and read or to find Jasper, the weekends were not so busy for him and Rose as they had slowly gotten back into their routines, Carlisle had not wanted to let them go and seeing as Emmett and I were going away – he found Jasper and Rose too good to get rid of because of not finding anyone else quickly to replace them and well, our relationships with Rose and Jasper had to be kept under wraps which we all agreed to and of course my parents were not going to go against Em and I again after everything that all of us had gone through as a family and as brother and sisters in love.
The book was no longer appealing and Rose had swapped shifts with Jasper so that he could have the evening off and she the morning to spend time with my brother and I so, without thinking twice..I walked to the front door, climbed into my shoes and took the spare key from the hook behind the front door and stepped out into the midday atmosphere for the hotel.
I had no idea where his class was but I tried the three main places that I had known about already of where Jasper had danced, sometimes Rosalie as well. At the beginning, because it was closest I went to the shack, where Jasper and I had shared a beautiful reconciliation when he had to go away from me because of being suspended from his job...But, no luck the shack was empty for a change and the next location I tried was in the hotel, itself the room where I had first seen Jasper dancing and unable to take my eyes off of him, God knows what the guests were thinking seeing me run around the hotel a little stupidly but hell, there was only one person on my mind right now.
The room was already occupied with what looked like people in karate outfits with different coloured belts for each person...Rolling my eyes and running back out again...There was one more place where he could be, now.
The theatre where the two of us had shared the most awful of memories and times in our relationship, I had not stepped in there since it happened but for Jasper...I'd face my fears over and over again if only to see his face.
Bringing my shaky hand up to the bar on the door, I pushed it down and the door swung forwards taking me with it...The sound of a beautiful samba song filled the room but gradually got lower and lower in volume as the song finished.
"I can't believe how much you have all improved since our last lesson!" Jasper's voice, I'd know it on my last breath...Smiling, I emerged from the wing curtain and stepped onto the stage the guests immediately turning up to look at me one by one as they partnered with one another in front of my blonde angel...With his back to me.
Jasper turned and beamed his white teeth blaring under the theatre lights above our heads, his smile was my home and I smiled back just as wide none of us saying anything in that moment...Jasper clearing his throat backed up his body leaning against the stage and held out his hand to me.
"Ladies and Gentleman, I have invited a good friend of mine to the lesson, today...Everyone meet Miss Bella Swan...She is an expert in the waltz-" ignoring my introduction completely, I took his hand and he lifted me one handed off of the stage and down to rest my feet on the floor. "Seeing as you guys have done so well...We are both going to treat you to a dance of our own making"
Oh hell, why was I going to protest to him...This is the man who had made my father appreciate me for who I am – never could I deny him, anything?
"Hello" I greeted the lookers on who had made themselves comfy on the seats of the theatre and all their eyes on Jasper and I, I only got a few hellos in reply but there were enough smiles to make me feel comfortable...Taking a deep breath, Jasper switched songs on his dock and took a step to the side standing strong, we were going to do the show choreography that had made us win and keep Jasper and Rose's jobs...The only dance I have ever done in my life but now, never going to be the last. Another slow song started up, what was so nice about Jasper's choice in music is that he never uses the same one during rehearsals and the performance, we both knew the song for the performance which was by an American country band called 'Rascal Flatts' but the dance never got boring because the song was on loop over and over again...Always the same beat, the songs he chose which was handy for the speed of the steps.
I look at you
Please don't walk away
I see you're about to
As soon as the lyrics of the song came through the speaker and the moment Jasper strode over and took me tightly in his hold...Everything around us disappeared...I did not have to worry about remembering the steps because they are always going to be somewhere in the back of my mind like riding a bike – when you haven't done it for a while, you pick it back up again because of the amount of work it took to learn it in the first place. This dance took blood, sweat and tears out of me but it also gave me the greatest gift that anyone can have...Love.
There is just something, I'd really like to say
So please don't walk away
Effortlessly and beautifully, Jasper lead and glided me across the small space between the stage and the audience members pivoting and spinning keeping our arms locked and our eyes deep within one anothers..No matter where I end up in my life after this summer and beyond in the future those eyes are going to be there – whenever I am down or upset, I will picture that blue beauty of a perfect and caring soul within and smile.
I know you're still there
Still you pretend you're not
Yes I know it hurts
I have also felt the pain
Spinning me on the spot, Jasper released his hold on me and climbed up onto the stage, having the right thought as me about how much space we had to move and looking up at him he smiled and bowed gentlemanly holding out his hand, without hesitation or the reality that maybe fifteen guests may see me fall on my face, I wrapped my hand around his and he lifted me into the air, my feet on the stage once more and brought his arms around my stomach...My back to him and rested his head on my neck as we rocked slowly from side to side.
There was no one else here, no one else but Jasper and I – in our own little world doing the very thing that had brought us together.
So should it matter?
What I do or what I've done
As long as in my heart
You're still the only one
I hear you say it
But I don't think you understand
I can be trusted now, I swear to you I can
Jasper ran his hands down my arms as we continued to waltz without the frame, breaking away from the usual guidelines but keeping our feet movements in harmony with one another...I spun and reached my arm out to wrap around his neck and with his arm around my waist we spun, nose to nose around in a spot.
The great thing about the dance was that it was a romantic one, expressing some kind of love story and Jasper and I had our very own one to draw upon so no one guest-wise can be uncomfortable with what we were doing on the stage because waltzing is romantic and smooth...Dance is an art – which I had never once realised or appreciated before until this summer.
It's been a year...A memory from my past
I know I did wrong
I wish to change...Just to make it last
But I guess it's been too long
Easy to move on to forget about it all
Is that what you do...Hoping I'll be gone
The dance picked up, the lifts involved in this section of Jasper's beautiful choreography, once looking back in a memory about a girl on a stage so scared to be lifted by her strict dance teacher and partner was long gone...Dad was right, I was a woman..A woman with a woman's heart capable of love and the greatest sacrifice – death for the man she loved. I'd die for Jasper, I'd go to the ends of the earth and back and I'd face anything to have him in my arms for the rest of my life...But how is that possible of a woman to hope..That is a young girl's dream and fantasy?
So should it matter?
What I do or what I've done
As long as in my heart
You're still the only one
I hear you say it...But I don't think you understand
I can be trusted now, I swear to you I can
If you got to know me again
Maybe then...Maybe then.
Splitting up, the first lift was heading our way...Jasper nodded at me from stage right and throwing my arms back into the air, I stepped to him gracefully in a small ballet run and he took my waist...Not lifting me all the way as he had done in the other hotel but his arms stretched out in front of him and he spun with me, swan-like position around all of the stage, causing me to smile at the change he had made to the choreography – these people we did not have to please and we were not being judged.
We could see what we should do
But that's all up to you
I'll be waiting for you
Placing me down on my feet, he added the lift my legs sprawled out one bent toe-pointed and the other out long my eyes locked with his and one of my arms around his neck and the other wrapped around his free hand to spin around waltz-style once I was placed down, again...The audience we had could not be seen or heard – Jasper and I were in our own world that only we can create and never had he looked or been so stunning with me, his care for me and love radiated from his eyes as much as my own did.
So should it matter what I do or what I've done?
As long as in my heart you're still the only one
I hear you say it but I don't think you understand
I can be trusted now
I swear to you I can
Coming to the end of the song, Jasper lifted me up unexpectedly onto his shoulder and held my hips as he spun us around in a circle, the smile permanent on my face at how safe I felt now with the lifting and how only weeks ago, I was practising them in the lake with Jasper in a wet-shirt...Hmmmm! That is my heaven!
So should it matter what I do or what I've done
As long as in my heart you're still the only one
Finishing on our ending position of a one armed fall...My body balancing on Jasper's hand my body inched to the floor and his other arm came up to stroke my face as he smiled, his eyes twinkling under the lights and the applause broke out snapping us from our world and bringing us back to real-life.
Taking a deep breath I took his hand and curtsied allowing me to bow along with me, the guests were on their feet and nodding with assurance that what we both had shown them was enough to make them feel like they were in the world with us.
Dance was beautiful...Enough said.
"Now, everyone..You may go..Those of you coming for Rosalie's class later on it is at five at the shack the rest of you I will see tomorrow" it took all the strength I had not to throw myself into Jasper's arms and kiss him with so much passion that the room spined around us – he had done so much for me, taken me back to the world of dance and also shown me that I could be the person that I truly wanted to be no matter who says otherwise.
As the last guest finally left the theatre, Jasper dragged me behind one of the wing curtains and crashed his lips to mine, the same amount of need evident in his mouth movements as he indulged and caressed my lips...My response was not much better, gripping onto his shoulders and moaning against him, his mouth opening for mine and mine to his...Our lips dancing like our bodies had just done.
"My Bella, my beautiful angel" he breathed moulding my lips to my face...I leant into him feeling the fire from his lips inching through the pores of my skin and down to my bones.
"I'm sorry for interrupting"
"Never be sorry...I have wanted to dance with you again for such a long time...You're amazing, my love" Jasper moved his mouth to my neck causing understandable speech to slowly deteriorate from my brain as he held on to me so tightly around my waist.
"I love you...I came here to say that I will always love you...Jazz?"
"Hmm?" he hummed bringing his head up to look at me, I ran a hand through his hair bringing one of them back from his shoulders.
"How are we going to be able to be without one another after the summer is over?"
Jasper sighed and shook his head "we're not going to worry about that my Bella...This is our moment and I want to spend all my time with you before we have to worry about those things"
"Take me back to yours, my darling Jasper...Please?"
"Of course my Bella"
Kissing me once more, he took my hand and led me back to his place...The rest of the time away from my parents whilst at lunch to be with each other.
My Jasper, my life and my soul.
I was immediately reminded about a line from 'Wuthering Heights'...
'I cannot live without my life...I cannot live without my soul'
Jasper is my life and my soul and Heathcliff was right, sometimes a love so strong can never be re-lived again through someone else.
**Song is 'Should it matter' by Sissel...One of the most beautiful and emotional songs and one of my all-time favourites...Look it up on youtube...It helps to picture what is going on in the scene with the song in the background**
