AN: One more chapter and second year is over! PoA is my absolute favorite, of the books and the movies, so I'm super excited to get to it. Thanks to the readers and favorites and followers who keep pushing me. Major thanks to reviewers serenityselena, Penny is wise, Eternal She-Wolf, Books are air, Cassandra30, Kairan1979, Narnia and Harry Potter 4 EVER, ginnyandharryluvr, kentrek1, elmoryakhan, red-jacobson, geetac, Spring Raine, Snowball1982, Lightningblade49, magitech, MariusDarkwolf, Tellur, serialkeller, Beloved Daughter, B00kw0rm92, Wonderbee31, and Element Kitsune.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter franchise

A small group of five second years sat huddled by the fire in the Gryffindor Common Room, speaking in hushed voices and throwing covert glances over their shoulders.

"I just can't believe it," Lavender kept saying, shaking her head.

"I knew it!" Seamus kept hissing, though his face was still pale and scared.

"What are we going to do?" Parvati asked.

The other four looked at her blankly.

"You know, about Lockhart?" She tried again.

"What do you mean?" Dean frowned.

"He just tried to Obliviate us!"

Neville whimpered, burrowing down further into his squashy armchair.

"Parvati, there's not really anything we can do," Lavender said gently.

Seamus was not so kind. "What are we gonna do? We don't know any real spells that we can use against him. Are we just supposed to hit him with a Jelly Legs Jinx and hope for the best?" He snorted in disbelief. "It's impossible! He'd just wipe our memories."

Parvati rolled her eyes. "I'm not talking about physically fighting him. I'm talking about destroying his public image."

Dean sat up straight, realization entering his eyes. "You mean through the Daily Prophet?"

"Among another publications." Parvati nodded her approval.

Neville was still apprehensive. "Why can't we just let someone else do it?"

"Because Neville, do you really think anyone else will? We're the only ones who have proof that Lockhart is a liar. We're the only ones who aren't just acting on a hunch or personal feelings. We have evidence!" Parvati paused, breathing heavily. "Besides," She added more calmly. "Father always said that if you want something done right, you should do it yourself."

"And where'd this new attitude come from?" Seamus said sourly. "You were the one who was so against us digging for information. Why are you so into it now?"

"That was before I knew he was such a…such a…a," She struggled to come up with a word.

"Liar?" Lavender suggested.

"Fake?" Dean offered.

"Fraud?" Neville recommended.

"Phony?" Seamus blurted out.

"Such a jerk!" Parvati exploded.

The Common Room turned to stare at the second year girl. She shrunk back, feeling her face burn.

"Maybe we should do this up in the dorms," Dean commented.

"That's probably a good idea," Parvati admitted. "We'll discuss where we should send our story."

"How about we make a story first?" Seamus mumbled.


Meanwhile, in the second year boy dorms, another small group sat plotting.

"Alright, so you know exactly what you've got to do, Ron?" Hermione double-checked.

"I've got it Hermione. You've only gone over it about a million times," Ron snapped.

Harry tried his best to intervene. "I'm sure everyone knows what they're about to do. It's really serious. If we don't get it right the first time, we won't get another chance, because Malfoy'll be so suspicious of us."

"You mean of Cormac," Katie corrected.

"Yes, right. Just, everyone get to your places, and if something goes wrong, think on your feet. You can do it. Now, Harry, call Dobby," Hermione instructed.

"Are you sure this will work?" Harry asked dubiously.

"Well, not entirely." Hermione shifted guiltily. "But I'm pretty sure. Just call him."

Harry, feeling a little foolish, sat on the edge of his bed. "Dobby," He whispered gingerly.

The little creature appeared with a pop, letting out a gasp as he took note of the others sitting around the circular room. "Mister Harry Potter Sir," He murmured. "Does Mister Harry Potter Sir know that there be strange children seeing Dobby?"

"Yeah, I know, Dobby," Harry reassured him. "These are my friends, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Katie Bell, Leann Miles, and Cormac McLaggen. We're going to set you free." Harry puffed up proudly.

Dobby's eyes began to water. He began to hiccup, softly at first, steadily growing in volume. "Mister Harry Potter Sir!" He wailed, launching himself at the skinny boy. He cried all over Harry's shirt, but Harry just patted him on the back and waited it out.

"It's okay Dobby. We'll get you out of there," Hermione said confidently.

"Thank you Missy Grangey," He squeaked out. He sniffled and used Harry's shirt to wipe away his tears and his snot. Harry grimaced.

"So I was thinking that we could—" Parvati stopped dead upon finding Harry and friends surrounding a house elf. "Um…"

"You can't tell anyone!" Ron ordered, jumping up as though ready to fight.

"We won't," Lavender told him.

"That is, as long as you do something for us," Seamus insisted slyly.

"Really? Resorting to blackmail?" Dean said incredulously.

"That depends on what you want us to do," Cormac replied, rising to stand next to Ron.

"We need your elf to go get something for us. He needs to be able to slip in and out without anyone knowing he was even there. Once he does that, we'll turn a blind eye to anything you do."

Harry began to nod in agreement, but Ron quickly stepped in.

"Hang on. What do you guys need?" He asked, curious.

"Why should we tell you?" Seamus retorted.

"Guys, stop!" Katie shouted. "Aren't you all supposed to be friends now?"

Dean looked down at the floor.

Ron shuffled his feet.

"So shouldn't you guys just be able to tell each other what's going on without worrying about anyone telling?" Katie said logically. "If you just lay it all out for each other, I'm sure everything will be fine."

"That's not a bad idea," Neville muttered quietly.

The others slowly began to agree.

"So…who goes first?" Parvati wondered.

"Considering we weren't the ones who had a house elf in the dorms…" Dean trailed off.

Harry sighed, certain that he was the one to explain it all. "This is Dobby. He's the Malfoys' house elf, and he's being mistreated, so we figured that we should try to get Malfoy to free him." It was an abbreviated version, true, but he didn't feel like wasting too much time on it.

Seamus seemed to have the same idea, for he gave a rather bare bones retelling of the events. "We found out that Lockhart's a fake, and we have proof, we just need to get it out there. The only problem is, the proof is still in his office."

"Why don't you just go back and get it?" Leann piped up.

"Are you kidding me?" Lavender exclaimed. "He tried to Oliviate us! I'm never going to be alone with him again."

"It's Obliviate, but yes." Parvati agreed with the sentiment.

"No way!" Ron gasped.

"What's Obliviating do?" Harry asked, feeling out of the loop.

"It's a spell that removes someone's memories. I can't believe he would do that." Hermione stared vacantly out the window.

"Good thing Professor Burbage was there to save us," Neville mentioned hesitantly.

Harry shook himself, trying to chase away the thought of what might have happened had she not been there. "Alright, so we need to work out some details. What have you guys got so far?"

As the kids brainstormed, Leann leaned over to whisper to Katie "Is it normally like this?"

Katie thought for a moment. "Well, last time there was a lot more running involved, but yeah. I guess it is. Do you like it?"

"I think I do." Leann fell backwards on to the bed. Katie slammed down next to her, and the two girls burst into giggles.


"Malfoy." Cormac greeted the younger boy coolly. He had heard stories about what the brat called those who weren't purebloods, and he hated him for it. He was doing this for Katie.

"McLaggen," Malfoy spat back, a confused look on his face. Cormac was certain that Malfoy couldn't figure out why Cormac was talking to him. Crabbe and Goyle flanked the blonde boy, but Cormac didn't bother to look their way.

"What do you want?" Malfoy continued.

"Why do I have to have a reason to hang out with more civilized wizards?" Cormac shot back, the words leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. His disgust must not have shown on his face, for Malfoy preened. Cormac flopped down on the grass next to the Slytherins, watching the Giant Squid attempt to tickle some nearby first years. He nodded every so often, to give the appearance of caring. Hurry up, he thought impatiently.

Pop!

"Is that your elf?" Cormac asked, feigning disinterest.

Malfoy scowled. "Unfortunately. The thing's bloody useless, can't do anything right."

"Young Master Malfoy." Dobby bowed so low his nose touched the ground.

"What is it, elf?" Malfoy barked in his best imitation of his father. His voice had not yet matured, which meant he sounded like a small, whiny child.

"Mistress has a message for Young Master," Dobby informed him.

Malfoy's face turned pink. "Not now," He growled.

"But Mistress told Dobby to deliver it immediately." Dobby stood firm.

"Fine. Get it over with." He prayed it wouldn't be something too embarrassing.

Dobby straightened up immediately.

Cormac tried to hide his grin.

"Mistress said that Young Master Malfoy must tell her when he needs more underwear. Mistress apologizes for sending oatmeal cookies instead of chocolate in Young Master Malfoy's goody bag. Mistress would like Young Master Malfoy to start courting Missy Parkinson, and if he does not, she will tell Master. Master is ashamed of Young Master Malfoy's class standing, and says he must improve."

"I'm second! And Parkinson's ugly. And what was all that other stuff about anyway, you stupid elf?" Malfoy couldn't stop looking over at McLaggen. "Get out of my sight!" He ordered.

"Hey Dobby," Ron said casually, strolling by. "I'm kind of hungry. D'you think you can go get me a snack from the kitchens?"

Dobby bobbed his head up and down before disappearing.

Malfoy couldn't believe his eyes. His house elf was tending to a Weasley? It was preposterous.

"Thanks a ton," Ron said gratefully as Dobby reappeared, his arms overflowing with food. "Here, I'll just take that, ooh, and you got some pie!"

"Mister Wheezy's favorite," Dobby replied knowingly.

"Dobby, I was wondering, have you seen my Quidditch gloves anywhere?" Harry asked, popping up from around the tree.

"Yes, Mister Harry Potter Sir!" Dobby trilled, disappearing to get them.

Malfoy began to sputter in shock.

"Great!" Harry brightened upon finding his gloves. "We don't have any more practices, since we won the Cup, but I still wanna fly, y'know?"

Cormac struggled to contain his laughter.

"One last thing, Dobby. Could you go get my Potions book for me? I think I left it in the Common Room. I really wanna study for exams," Hermione requested politely.

"Yes Missy Grangey!" Dobby beamed enthusiastically.

Malfoy felt his blood begin to boil. As soon as Dobby got back, he stood up and stomped over to the elf childishly. "What do you think you're doing?" Malfoy demanded.

"Dobby be getting things for his friends," Dobby responded, a confused look on his face.

Malfoy let out a strangled sound. "Friends? You can't be friends with them!"

"You know what I would do if I were him?" Cormac said loudly to Crabbe and Goyle, knowing Malfoy was listening in. "I would give that elf clothes right now. He can't just go and become friends with my enemies, doing stuff for them and not me. What gave him the right? I would just fire him now. It's what any respectable wizard would do."

Malfoy stiffened.

The trio held their breath.

Dobby stared up at him beseechingly.

Crabbe and Goyle watched dumbly, drool dribbling out of their mouths.

Malfoy quickly ripped his tie away from his shirt and threw it at Dobby, who caught it and gaped.

"Get away from me you filthy elf! Father will find someone better than you, someone who actually knows how to do their job." Malfoy gestured to his bodyguards, and the three boys lumbered up to the castle.

Dobby waited until they were out of earshot to attack Harry with a hug. "Mister Harry Potter Sir!" He screeched, sobbing. "Mister Harry Potter Sir has freed Dobby. Mister Harry Potter Sir is good and just."

Harry blushed furiously. "Well, y'know I had help," He mentioned gently.

Dobby flew at Cormac next. "Mister McLaggy is so great to face Young Master Malfoy for Dobby!"

Cormac snorted. "He's not honestly that scary. You don't have to thank me," He said, attempting to be modest.

Dobby let go of Cormac's legs and instead began babbling incoherently to Hermione and Ron.

"Really?" Cormac huffed. He heard two girlish giggles, and turned to find Leann and Katie, who had watched all the events unfold.

"That's what you get for trying to be humble," Katie teased.

"Is there any way I can get thanks and not seem conceited?" He asked jokingly.

"For other people, sure. For you, definitely not." Katie laughed.

"Gee, Katie, you're sure a great friend," He said sarcastically, throwing an arm around her shoulders.

Katie froze as she realized what they'd just done in front of Leann.

Cormac groaned inwardly; he'd just screwed the whole thing up.

But Leann, surprisingly, smiled at them and approached Dobby with kind eyes.

"See," Cormac nudged Katie. "You guys will always be friends."

"Yeah," Katie whispered, swallowing the lump in her throat. "Yeah, I guess we will."


Lee Jordan wandered the halls of Hogwarts, feeling more than a little lonely. Fred and Alicia were off snogging in a broom closet. George and Angelina were 'talking about their feelings', which was the biggest load of tripe Lee had ever heard. Cormac didn't seem to need any more help, for he had gotten mighty close with Katie out by the lake. Penny and Percy were having a study session, which Lee thought was really just code for more snogging.

It seemed everyone either had someone or didn't want someone. Oliver cuddled up with the Quidditch Cup at night. Even Bernie Benson, the other boy in the Gryffindor fourth year dorms, had a girlfriend. True, it was a girl from Hufflepuff with a smashed up face and a nasally voice, but still! The point was, Lee Jordan was single, and he needed to do something to rectify the situation.

The girls in Gryffindor were either taken, too young, or too old. And there was that small category of girls who wouldn't even look his way because in a second year prank, Lee had to prank the girls' dormitories, and Fred and George pranked the boys'. Lee didn't think it was really fair because they must have known that it would backfire on him, and most girls would end up hating him.

The Slytherin girls were automatically out, because they were Slytherins. Lee really didn't think he needed to explain that any further. Ravenclaws were generally against pranking, and they were sticklers for the rules, which meant he wasn't about to pick up a girl from the house of the intelligent. This left Hufflepuff.

The twins had shown him once where the entrance to the Hufflepuff Common Room was, and he thought that would help an awful lot in this situation. Perhaps he could enter mysteriously, and make them think that he was some sort of all-knowing man. Yes, that would be perfect. Girls loved mysterious, or so his many female cousins said. Lee's whole family was made up of women, bar his Uncle Dirk, who usually fell asleep anyway.

If Lee ever had kids, he wanted to have a ton of boys and one girl, a little like the Weasley family. One girl, because then he could do the overprotective father act on her future boyfriends. Boys, because he really wanted some masculine company at his own home.

But before he could do all that, he needed to find an actual girl first. He was just about to enter the Hufflepuff Common Room when Cedric Diggory, in all his glory, stepped out.

"Jordan, what are you doing here?" Diggory asked sourly.

"Trying to pick up some girls," Lee said truthfully.

"Why don't you just go back to your own house?" Diggory sneered.

"All of them are taken," Lee complained.

"I'm not going out with Angelina anymore," Diggory pointed out.

"Yeah I know. She's going out with George," Lee told him.

"What? But he—at Hogsmeade he—"

"No, that was Fred," Lee said. "George and Angelina are going out, and they don't seem to want good ol' Lee to hang around, so I figured I better find myself a girlfriend."

"Good luck trying to find one here," Cedric scoffed. "They aren't doing anything. I was gonna find a Ravenclaw instead. Wanna come?"

Lee waved him off. "Nah. Ravenclaws don't do pranks, and I need pranks. I guess I'll just have to convince some of the Gryffindor girls to stop hating me."

"Good luck," Cedric told him, setting off down the hall towards the Great Hall.

"Yeah, thanks." Lee thought it highly unlikely that he could make up for…that incident. He'd never been very good with girls anyway. Even his family thought him awkward and uncomfortable. He couldn't listen to girls talk about bras and feelings and makeup. He didn't understand them, and so, he ignored them. They were just too weird.

In his musings, he'd accidentally wandered into the second floor corridor, which he didn't realize until he saw the girl's bathroom door.

"Oh no," He whispered. He backpedalled furiously, intending to leave as soon as possible.

"Lee!" A high pitched voice shrieked from behind. "Did you come to visit me?"

"Um," Lee scrambled around for an answer. "Only just for a minute, because I've got to study soon, y'know. Exams are soon, so…"

"Come on in," Myrtle giggled and flew through the door.

At this point, Lee really would've wanted a goody two shoes Ravenclaw instead.


Harry Potter calls Lockhart's Bluff

The Boy-Who-Lived Not Impressed with His New Professor

Gilderoy Lockhart and the Deceiving Smile

Puddlemere's Newest Player Dishes on a Certain Professor

The Quibbler, the Daily Prophet, Witch Weekly, and Which Broomstick had all published stories on the same day, all about Lockhart. Dean had tried to remember what his step-father always wrote in his notes, and set them and the notebooks that Dobby had fetched into several media outlets.

Harry and Oliver, though mostly Oliver phrasing Harry's ideas politely, had written out responses to different journalists requesting information, and it seemed to be working. Lockhart had walked into the hall in the morning, totally unaware that he had just been destroyed. All around Harry, students were reading all of his lies and secrets. Witch Weekly couldn't believe they'd been duped and given out their "Most Charming Smile" award to someone who hardly knew a proper Expelliarmus. Which Broomstick swore they had known the whole time, and simply didn't have the proof to back it up. The Quibbler claimed they'd been the first on the scene, and The Daily Prophet said the Ministry was looking into the matter.

But Harry's favorite reaction by far was the look on Lockhart's face as he realized he'd been caught. He read every piece on him, before fleeing the room. McGonagall rose, and the students turned towards her expectantly.

"Students of Hogwarts, I'm afraid that Professor Lockhart shall no longer be with us here at Hogwarts. As you all know, exams are next week, and all of the professors will administer the Defence Against the Dark Arts exam when we can. Thank you for your understanding."

Harry couldn't help but laugh as the majority of the people in the room let out whoops out that.