Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation and I just borrow characters to write a fan fiction story with noncommercial intentions. And I hope I don't offend anyone.
A/N: italics – for Shuichi's song lyrics
PRETTY PLEASE Part2
Aaron's POV
I give the phone to Shuichi. Sakuma Ryuichi is calling. He is extremely strange and carries around that pink bunny…as I know he is actually more than thirty years old. Well, I have seen a lot since I am working in show business. But he is a nice guy and not on the "unwelcome" list, so I hand the phone over to Shuichi.
Seguchi Tohma was trying to call several times today. But he is not speaking to Shuichi while I m answering his phone.
It looks like my little Ice is in the decent mood today. He looks almost happy. I guess his date was fine. Shuichi wouldn't tell me any details. He was a little bit upset about publication in newspaper, but it is nothing new recently. Of course it is revolting when you can't make a step without being followed by the flash lights.
I hope Shuichi will never find out about my role in this. And I hope Yuki Eiri saw those pictures.
Shuichi he is talking to Ryuichi…
Wait a minute…Something is very wrong. His face turns pale, eyes blank and his hands are trembling slightly. He drops the phone and falls down on his knees suddenly looking helpless, confused and scared. Something is wrong.
"Shuichi! What happened? What is wrong? Are you Ok? Do you want some water?"
He turns his head away avoiding my eyes. It looks like he is thinking about something.
"Nothing…" Shuichi whispers barely audibly. "Nothing at all…"
Jeah, right. Nothing…
"And what do you mean by nothing?"
He struggles to his feet.
"I…I am leaving…"
"Shuichi, you can't just…we need you…the movie…Shuichi! Wait! You can't just leave! What happened, please explain at least!"
"It is not your b…I am sorry, I must go. It is an emergrncy. But you don't need to worry."
"Emargency? I don't need to worry? What kind of emergency is it if I don't need to worry?"
"I am leaving. I will be fine. I promise. And don't ask anything now."
He doesn't leave me time to say or do anything. He just storms out of the door.
I don't like it. This is not good at all. I need to call Ryuichi and ask what the matter is. I didn't expected that he of all people will say something bad to Shuichi… I need to find out what happened and what can I do about this. Maybe this has something to do with his friends. Something not really bad and… No. I saw his face. And if it is so simple, why didn't he tell me?
I need to tell Nicholas Jordan that Shuichi ran off. He is not going to be pleased…But what is going on? And where is Shuichi now? I hope he is fine…as fine as he can be. He promised. My poor little boy…
Shuichi's POV
I can go home now. Yuki will not be stalking me anymore, maybe never. Depends on how bad it is. It can't be that bad…he can't be in serious danger or dead…I am a fool. I am afraid. And I have ridiculous ideas right now. Being a drama queen.
Arghh! I just want to go and see if he's all right!
Or hurt someone.
And I don't. I can't go. He doesn't want to see me. Why did Ryuichi tell me this? Does he think that me and Yuki that we… There is no we. Ryuichi found out that Yuki is in the hospital because of Tatsuha. It is not like I was supposed to know. It is not like Yuki called me and asked me to come. Would he? Would you like to see me Yuki?. Why Ryu wanted me to know? Maybe I shouldn't just drop the phone and ask him some questions…
Is this my fault? I came back. Yuki had a lot of stress because of me, because of that TV- show and everything. I have always made Yuki worried. Toha was always coming down on me about that. So I was trying hard. Being nice, sweet, and cheerful and doing whatever Yuki wanted. Being there for him when he wanted, leaving him alone when he wanted, sleeping with him when he wanted. Love slave.
And it was always my fault when something was wrong. Maybe it really was. Maybe I just did it again. Something what I did made Yuki sick. I know that stress usually made his condition worse. I am his "stress factor". Did he see the pictures? My dte with Solo. Could that mean anything to him?
That hurts so much. I don't want him to die because of me. I was angry. He has been torturing me recently, but I don't want anything bad happening to him. It is Yuki…
I just need to be alone and think about everything. I really don't know what to do. I hate… I hate my life! I hate Yuki! I hate everything! I hate myself…
I hate that couch! Hate! Hate! Hate!
Symbol of rejection and humiliation. Rejection which means destruction. My destruction. Yuki rejected me. He humiliated me. And I still care and love.
Pathetic! Pathetic! Pathetic!
Tohma's POV
Detective just called me. He said that Shuichi went home. He left work early. I must try to make everything better. I will try.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
Strange. I feel as I usually feel when I am going to talk to Eiri about something important. Ask him something. Persuade him. I am almost intimidated. Intimidated by Shindou Shuichi? That is…hm… No. I more am intimidated because of situation. I am afraid that he will kick me out or will not open the door as Eiri sometimes does.
"Go away!"
I hear someone shouting from inside, no, I am sure it is Shuichi.
"Shindou Shuichi! It is Seguchi Tohma! Please, open the door!"
Silence.
"Leave me alone!"
Some time ago I was able to scare him, blackmail him, persuade him to do something. But now…He is being very Eiri…I kind of know how to deal with Eiri. To certain level of course. I could write a manual "One hundred and two tips or how to deal with ill-tempered and crabby relatives".
"Shuichi! I am not leaving until we talk!"
Nothing.
"I will be waiting here!"
Quiet.
"Please open the door!"
Door flies open. Shuichi is standing in front of it and glaring at me. He looks furious. His hair is disheveled, white cotton shirt crumpled and he has strange gleam in his eyes.
"You will never leave me alone? That would be too much to ask! Fine! Suit yourself! Let's get over with it!"
He walks inside…I think I am allowed to follow.
Shuichi sits down on the floor in the front of couch…black leather couch. Ripped up couch. Oh, god, did he do that? Why? He picks up a knife from the floor and starts playing with it. Eiri never allowed Shu touch knifes, because boy used to cut himself. Then Eiri was complaining about blood all over his place as if he didn't care that boy was hurt.
I want to do something. Make him stop acting like this. I want to make him stop doing whatever he is doing, because it is wrong. But I don't know what to do or say. It is shocking to see Shuichi like this. He was…he was so cheerful and… It was easy to be angry about things he said when we met last time. I don't want to see him becoming like Eiri, hiding his feelings behind hostility and anger. It hurts to see Shuichi like this. And it means Eiri was right.
"Well, Tohma, lets get over with it. Did you come to tell me that Eri is sick and it is my fault? Or…I don't know what else you could say. Go ahead and leave."
"I am not here to blame you."
"Hm," he snorts. "That is something new. Are you not well or something?"
Yes, it hurts. But I deserve that for being oblivious
"I am sorry."
He looks at me with amusement. It is strange, dark amusement amusement.
"No way? Really? About what?"
Here comes sarcasm… I guess I deserve that too.
"I was unfair. I treated you bad. I thought that I new what is better. But I was wrong."
Shuichi drops the knife on the floor and covers face with his hands.
"Why are you saying this? Why! Why can't you just leave me alone?" His voice is cracked.
"Because people care about you. Maybe you don't believe me, but I care about you and…Eiri cares about you…"
"Shut up Tohma! I don't want to hear this!"
I could tell him that Eiri still loves him. I could. But I have no right. I can't say it. Eiri must say it himself.
"I came to ask you…would you…Please, go to Eiri. Visit him in the hospital."
He starts laughing darkly.
"So this is it all about? I don't understand you Tohma. Why did you suddenly want me to go to Eiri? Where is the catch? What do you both want from me? What game are you playing?"
"I know, sometimes I…sometimes I play games, but not this time," well at least less than usually. Hm, I think I am not being honest right now. But, I am as honest as possible. "I have no right to ask you anything. Just think about it. Think about visiting him."
"Yuki is not dying or something?" He tries to be cynical and say it without emotion, but as professional musician I can hear his voice trembling slightly.
"He is not well, but not that bad of course. But still not well. I just wanted to make it better. I can't. You can."
"Leave me alone."
"I will, I am sorry."
I can not make him do anything. I have no right. Maybe I am not fair again. Maybe I should not have came tonight…
Shuichi's POV
So many times I try
to make you understand
You never tried to see behind my smile
If
I didn't know you like I do
I'd get you into the secret in
me
Just because I'm good at fooling you
When no one's
around I walk in your shoes
I'm smiling, while lying to
you
I'm smiling, while lying to you
If you only knew
I
always try to hide behind a painted smile
So many tears the public
never see (1)
TBC
A/N: (1) Credit for the song goes to Mono (Silicone).
I think this chapter is kind of slow ragain. But I think there will be some action next time. And after that I am planning something really...hmm...kind of something big. Of course I am not sure how do you see this, perception differencies etc. But, we will see that!
Thank you for being with me! Your good words make me really happy and I am glad that you enjoy reading. So if you read my story but don't review it – please do it – I want to know your opinion!
