Disclaimer: I do not own nor profit from this story, it's characters or any other parts of it.
BETA: MIST
A/N: I"m afraid this journey is slowly drawing to a end. Not too many more chapters to go. Hope you guys understand that Bella did not previously understand what the hell "imprint" meant in previous chapters. She was too blinded and blown away with everything else that had been happening that it had not really occurred to her to dig further into the concept.
**Also hope you joined Irrevocable. It's going to be my version of how Vampires/Wolves should act. NO damn shiny glamor boys. It will be a darker side to the story and also be a bit more dirty. It will also be my first Jake/Bella/Jasper story line. ***
Bittersweet Chapter 28: The Bitter Cold Truth
A week later…..
Collin stood in the shower. The cold water spraying over his sore muscles. He knew that hot water would have been better for the soreness but lately his skin was so hot. He was finding it easier to remain in control of his body. He was able to call the wolf out and to put the wolf away when commanded. He knew Jake was testing him to see if he would be able to withstand seeing Bella. He was okay with it. He understood Jake's concerns. Hell, even he had wondered if he would ever get use to the idea of Bella with Jake. Although his heart sang a new tune when it came Leah. He saw her each day and each day the bond between them only grew stronger. So strong that he was pretty sure everyone knew about them by now although they had not come out and proclaimed what had conspired between them.
He knew Jake was aware of it. He had seen him spying on them more than the others. He also started making Leah go on patrol with one of the other members. It irk him at first but then Leah would remind him this was something she had been doing for several years now. She had more experience than he did. He knew she was right logically but his heart hated it. Hated that she was able to protect herself better than he could.
"You need to hurry. Jake wants to speak to you before he goes home." Sam shouted through the closed bathroom door.
Collin sighed loudly as he ran a handful of shampoo through his hair before rinsing off completely. Stepping out of the shower with just a towel wrapped around his waist he walked out to find Jake and Sam sitting on the edge of his sorry excuse of a bed.
Jake stood up in a Alpha stance as he stared at Collin with stern eyes.
"Bella wants to see you. I am not quite sure if your ready for such a visit but …well, I love her and I hate watching her worry herself sick over this confrontation." Jake states honestly.
"She is sick?" Collin looks worried as he glances between the two men.
"She has had an upset stomach and nightmares. I think she is just freaking out a little over seeing you after all this time. She fears your reaction to her being with me now." Jake held back the other half of the story that was really keeping her up at night.
"I get it. I do. I won't lie to you and say that it doesn't hurt me to think of her with someone else. I am hoping that seeing her with my own eyes, hearing with my own ears that she loves you back will help ease some of my worries." Collin replies as he leans up against the wall.
"And if it doesn't?" Sam interrupts the conversation between the two men who both love Bella.
"I will accept it regardless. What else can I do? I can't exactly run away with her." Collin snickers rudely.
"You better not dare try!" Jake's jaw clenchs as he steps up in Collin's face glaring at him with such a heated stare that Collin feels the wolf in him whimper. He isn't a fool. He knows that Jake can bound him to remain here for as long as he wants. Leah had explained to him that as his Alpha Jake had complete control over him. If he ever tried to separate himself from the pack then he could lose his powers forever or worse he would go rogue. No one had ever done such a thing so no one knew what that entailed exactly. Collin did not want to be the first in his people's history to disobey and break the rules of the pack.
"Relax Jake. I won't. I have someone else now. Someone I think you both know whom I am speaking of." Collin wraps his arms around his chest as he glares at Sam with a smug smile on his face.
"Just because you two imprinted does not mean necessarily she can't still love another." Sam rolls his eyes at the immaturity of Collin.
"Oh really. Is that how it is for you?" Collin stood up straighter as his chest grew as he stared coldly at Sam.
Sam look at the floor for a few seconds before looking up at Collin.
"I will always hold a spot for her in my heart." Sam answers calmly as he stands up to Collin.
"So you both will understand that I feel the same about Bella. I will do whatever I can to protect her." Collin glances between them.
"Good. Just remember she is mine now. She will always be mine." Jake growls softly but effectively to make it clear that he will never give up what belongs to him.
"Fine." Collin answers.
"When do we meet?" Collin asks curiously.
"Tomorrow morning. I will bring her to the practice field. You better remember your training. If you hurt her or scare her I swear I will beat you down." Jake warns him as he walks out of the small hut with Sam behind him.
Collin sits down on the edge of the bed. Tomorrow can't come soon enough for him. At last he can see her face, feel her hands in his, and know in his heart that all of this that had come to be was truly worth it. After all, if Bella was happy at last then he would be able to accept all of this with a much better heart.
Jake ran his hands through her hair as his lips covered hers. He was struggling with the idea of letting her go face Collin even though it was the right thing to do. He loved her. He knew she loved him. He also knew he had the added insurance of her being his imprint to assure that love remained between them.
"Jake, honey…..we have to go." Bella cups his face between her hands as she looks up into his face.
"Do we?" Jake teases as he places a soft kiss on the tip of her nose.
"Yes." Bella laughs softly as she releases his face.
"Remember if I sense him phasing you run, run as fast as you can behind me." Jake warns her for the hundredth time since he agreed to the meeting.
"I will." Bella salutes him like a solider. Jake rolls his eyes at her as he takes her hand and leads her to the field.
Quietly they walk through the woods. Jake can feel her nervousness. His own nerves are frayed.
They had already found several new vampires in the area in the past week. Carlisle warn them there would be many more. More with special powers and very strong survival instincts.
Bella feels her heart soar between fear and love as she stares at Collin a few feet in front of her. She can see the changes in his physical form since he joined the pack. He had always been an athletic person but he was way more buff than usual. She felt like weeping when she saw the way he look at her. He was as scared as she was about this meeting. They both had so much to gain and lose but only she knew that.
"Be careful Bella. He will not take the news well. Not like you did." Jake warns her before he releases her hand. She reaches up kissing him on the cheek. Slowly she walks toward Collin.
Collin can feel his heart beating heavy in his head as he walks toward her. He notices immediately how nervous she appears. He wonders if it is due to her knowledge of the wolf in him.
"Hey stranger." Her voice was soft but shaky.
"Hey. Long time no see." He jokes back.
"I can't believe we are here. I mean who knew." He continues to joke as he reaches down to take her hand in his.
Bella gulps hard. She knows he is just wanting to make sure that she is real and not some sort of mirage. Glancing down at their hands as he slides his fingers in between hers.
"It's really you." Collin's eyes shimmer with unshed tears.
"Yes." Bella replies as she smiles happily at him.
"Why Bella? Why did you come here?" Collin had decided before she showed up to ask the first question, the most important question that had been burning in the back of his head since he learned she was here.
"It's a long story Collin. It's one that I want to share with you but….well…" Bella releases his hand as she glances back at Jake for a supportive look before turning back to face Collin. Jake grins at her. She knows he will be there in a second if she needs him. Feeling a little less scared she continues.
"I got a visit from someone who had some bizarre and upsetting news. You see the day that we went into the hospital to have Colleen, Jake and his girlfriend Sienna were there. In fact Jake saved my life that day. But that is another story." Bella inhales deeply chewing on the corner of her lip.
Collin stands quietly listening to every word she speaks.
"Anyways, well…ummm…it seems that this guy who I spoke with feared that our daughter, Colleen was not dead. Well, the one named Colleen was dead but she was not actually ours." Bella pinch the bridge of her nose trying to make her explanation sound reasonable and hoped like hell that she could get threw the whole explanation without him phasing on her.
"What?" Collin squint his eyes as he lean in closer to her. He was not sure where this was all leading. How in the world could their daughter's death have brought Bella here?
"Jake's daughter was born on the same day at the same hospital as ours. His daughter, Lizzie was diagnosed with a cancer that required a bone marrow transplant. When he went in to see if he was a match he learned that she was not his biological daughter." Bella suck in her breath as she watch him grow restless.
"That is sad and all but what the hell does this have to do with YOU coming here. " Collin runs his hand through his hair scratching the top of his head as he stares at her with a sad grin. He hates hearing that Jake's daughter was deathly ill. Hell, he knew how it felt to lose a child. It was a nightmare he hoped to never have again.
"I'm getting to it. Just wait." Bella covers her face with her hands rubbing her eyes as tears begin to burn the back of her eye lids. She knows what she will say next is going to blow his mind. It could trigger the wolf in him.
Jake is here. He will not let Collin harm you. Not that Collin will mean too but just in case.
Inhaling deeply she drops her hands to her sides and stares boldly at him.
"Collin, his daughter, Lizzie is ours. Someone swapped the babies by accident. Our daughter, our flesh and blood daughter has been raised here for the past year. No one knew about the swap until her illness." Bella gulps hard as she watches his eyes widen as what she has told him sinks into his head.
Taking a step toward him she grabs his hands, placing a comforting smile on her face.
"Our baby is alive Collin. I was a match. I helpped save her life." Bella spoke with earnest but her eyes were filled with tears of joy.
"Your telling me that the child we buried. The child we mourned over. That baby was never ours." Collin spoke slowly as he gulped hard.
"No." Bella shook her head.
"Who would have swapped her? How is that possible?" Collin glances behind Bella at Jake who is still standing firmly in place.
"The hospital did not know. They started an investigation but still have no answers." Bella sobs.
"But she is alive Collin. That's the most important thing here. Focus on that. WE get a second chance with her." Bella cries out as she watches his jaw tightening up in his usual stubborn and pissed off way.
"WE? How long have you known Bella? How long?" His voice cracks as he stares deep into her eyes.
Bella stares into the bloodshot eyes knowing what she is about to say next is going to be just the thing to piss him off.
"A month now." Bella whispers.
Collin slings her hands away from him as he steps back turning away from her.
Jake takes a step toward them. He can feel the emotional whirlwind in Collin already brewing.
"Would you have EVER told me?" Collin asks with his back toward her.
"Yes. Jake and I were going to contact you once we knew she was well. We were more concerned with her health at the time that we learned all of this." Bella prayed he would understand that she was more concerned with Lizzie's health than informing him. Hell, who was she kidding she was afraid that Collin would take away her daughter. She was not ready to share her with him. She had just got her back. She knew it had been selfish on her part.
"So Jake has been raising her as his own daughter." Collin's fists curl up by his side.
"Yes, she has been raised by him and the other people here. They love her so much Collin. She has not suffered." Bella hopes he feels some peace at knowing she was here among his people and not with complete strangers.
"I can't believe this. First YOU….." Collin turns slowly as his eyes pierce into her soul.
"Me?" Bella frowns at him.
"YOU have to be the one. HIS imprint. You belong to him and now MY daughter too. When does it stop?" Collin shouts as he takes a step to the side staring boldly at Jake who is drawing closer.
"YOU took everything from me! Are you happy now Jake! ARE YOU? " Collin's body tenses up, his face turning red Bella moves further away from him like Jake had instructed earlier if she had seen these exact signs from Collin.
"I did not do it on purpose Collin. I swear to you. It was just as much as a shock to me as it is to you. I love them both. I can't help how it all came to be. I told you that I saw her and I tried to fight the imprint. Lizzie was something I had no freaking clue about until her illness. I swear to you as your friend and your Alpha." Jake's voice grows loudly as he nods at Bella to move aside. Standing in front of Collin where Bella had been just moments before.
"MY FRIEND! Really Jake, come on your father murdered my family and YOU well you just stole MY other family from me." Collin shakes his head as every muscle in his body begins to squirm and tightened up. He can feel the wolf. It is screaming to be released.
"I did no such thing Collin. Listen to me. Calm down. Think about this with a clear mind. Go! Go run it off." Jake orders him.
Collin shakes his head furiously, turning to look at Bella with lethal eyes before the change slips out of his control. Seeing Bella crying and shaking in fear was not enough to stop him. The phase took over and he was now a large wolf. A large pissed off wolf.
Bella's hands shook as she covered her mouth from screaming. He was the same wolf. The very wolf she had seen in her nightmares. The same coloring, the same size, everything was just as she dreamt it. Was he going to attack her now like in the dream?
Jake's phase took less than a minute as he began to growl louder than Collin. His alpha powers began to radiate off his skin, the mystical powers electrified the air.
YOUWILLSTANDDOWN. SHEDIDNOTHINGWRONG. REMEMBERCOLLINWEPROTECTHUMANS.
Jake could see the images flashing through Collin's mind. He was remembering her round with child. The way he would tease her while pregnant that she wobbled like a duck. Then he saw her broken. Her heart filled with grief. He then saw Collin recalling the day they took their vows. The way her eyes look into his. The love she had shown him. The way her skin felt against it.
COLLINSHEISNOTTHEENEMY. REMEMBERHOWMUCHYOULOVEDHER. DONOTMAKEMEHAVETOHURTYOUTOPROTECTHER.
Jake warn him that he would cause harm to him if he tried to hurt Bella. Collin's head move in the direction of Bella. He saw her tears. He could smell the fear she was sending out. She feared him. She truly feared him. He hated this. He hated ALL of it. How could he be expected to not over react to the news that Jake had imprinted with his ex-wife, had been raising his thought to be dead daughter, and now the two of them were raising her as their own. Where was he in this picture? Would he even be allowed to get to know his own daughter? Did Bella not see him as worthy enough to be the father of his own child? Could Jake's Alpha powers keep him away from his child?
"Collin please don't do this. I'm sorry. I am sorry that I did not tell you right away. It's my fault not his." Bella cries out as she watches as he paws the ground preparing for a fight to the death with Jake.
YOUDON'TWANTMEHEREDOYOUJAKE. YOUWANTTHEMBOTHFORYOURSELF. YOUWILLNEVERLETMESEEMYDAUGHTER.
Jake heard the pain in Collin's voice. He was starting to understand why Collin was really so pissed off at him. He feared that Jake was going to keep him away from his own child because he had the power to do so. Collin felt powerless. It was not a particular feeling that Jake liked himself. When Lizzie was diagnosed he felt powerless. Powerless to help his own child. He did not want Collin to feel that way.
IWON'TLIETOYOUCOLLIN, ITSUCKSFORMETHATIHAVETOSHAREMYDAUGHTERWITHSOMEONEELSEBUTINALLFAIRNESSILOVEHERENOUGHTOGIVEHERTHECHANCETOKNOWHERBIOLOGICALFATHER. ASLONGASYOUDONOTCAUSEHERANYHARMIWILLNEVERREFUSEYOUFROMSEEINGHER.
Collin claw at the ground making Bella tremble and shake, taking a few steps backwards.
ITHURTSSEEINGHERANDKNOWINGSHEBELONGSTOYOUNOW. ITHURTSBUTIKNOWITSMYEGONOTMYHEARTTHATHURTSSOMUCH. ILOVEHERJAKE. IWILLALWAYSFEELANEEDTOPROTECTHER. IDESERVETHECHANCETOKNOWMYDAUGHTER. IWASALOUSYHUSBANDBUTTHATDOESNOTMEANTHATIWILLBEALOUSYFATHER.
Jake agreed with him. It was not fair to judge Collin based on his infidelities. His marriage had ended. His heart no longer stayed loyal to Bella but that did not mean he would hurt his own child. He was a human being. He was capable of making poor decisions. Jake nodded his head in agreement.
IKNOWWHATYOUMEAN. ICHOSETHEWRONGWOMANTOREVEALALLMYSECRETSTOO. IPRETENDEDTHATTHEIMPRINTBETWEENBELLAANDIDIDNOTEXIST. NOWIHAVEAEXGIRLFRIENDWHOISAVAMPIREANDHASREVEALEDEVERYTHINGABOUTUSTOTHEM. WEAREABOUTTOGOTOWARTOKEEPOURPEOPLEFROMDYINGOUT. AWARTHATCOULDHAVEBEENPREVENTEDHADINOTMADEABETTERDECISION. SOIGETTHATYOURHUMAN. IGETTHATYOULETHERDOWNBUTYOURRIGHTTHATSHOULDNOTKEEPHERORMEFROMLETTINGYOUKNOWLIZZIE.
Jake took a steady step back. He wanted Collin to see that he was not here to fight but to protect. He could not let Collin hurt Bella by accident or out of anger.
IWANTLIETOYOUJAKE, IT'SKILLINGMETOTHINKIHAVETOSHARETHEMWITHYOU. IKNOWYOUDIDNOTKILLMYPARENTS. STILL, YOUAREHISSEED. IKNOWICAN'TTAKEBELLAAWAYFROMYOU. IUNDERSTANDTHISIMPRINTBETWEENYOUTWO. ASYOUHAVEALREADYGUESSEDIHAVEIMPRINTEDWITHLEAH. IWANTTOKNOWMYDAUGHTER. IWANTHERTOGETTHECHANCETOKNOWME. THEREALME.
Jake nodded his head in agreement. Everything Collin said to him was honest and straightforward. There was nothing there he could argue with. He knew that Bella would not be too pleased with the fact that Collin deserved more rights and time with his daughter but it was fair. After all they would have her most of the time.
IWILLSPEAKTOBELLAABOUTALLOFTHIS. RIGHTNOWYOUARESHOWINGHERTHEWOLFINYOU. ITFRIGHTENSHER. YOUSHOULDGONOW. GIVEHERSOMETIMETOCALMDOWN. IWILLCALLYOULATER, YOUCANCOMEBYANDSEELIZZIE.
Jake gulp hard. He knew this day would come the moment he heard Collin was in town. He was going to have to suck it up and be a good man. He knew that the situation could have been far worse for him. Had Bella not been his imprint, she and Collin could have easily step into town and took Lizzie completely away from him.
Collin look sadly at Bella before turning on his heels and running into the woods in the direction of the beach.
Jake relaxed once he knew Collin was safely away. Phasing back he took a deep breathe as Bella threw her arms around his neck crying into his chest.
"Shh…it's okay. We did not fight. We are both okay." Jake rub her back in circular motion.
"I was so scared. I knew he would be mad at me. I deserve it. I really do. God, I was so selfish Jake." Bella continue to weep into his chest. He could feel the cool tears sliding down into his waist band of his pants.
"We both were Bella." Jake tilted her head up as he crook his fingers beneath her wet chin.
"What did he say?" Bella wiped away the tears from his chest.
"He wants to see her. He wants to know his daughter. I agreed with him." Jake told her gently as he lean down pressing their lips together.
"Are we sure he won't hurt her?" Bella's eyes flutter as the kiss sends a thousand tingles up her spine.
"No we are not. But honestly Bella any of the pack could cause any human harm by accident. None of us are perfect." Jake warn her.
"I hate it." Bella pouted.
"I do too but honey we have to do the right thing for Collin and Lizzie." Jake reminds her that not only was keeping Collin and Lizzie apart wrong to Collin but Lizzie as well.
"Fine but can you please tell me what the hell everyone means when they mention imprinting….I am serious Jake. Something warns me that you are hiding something from me AGAIN!" Bella slips out of his embrace as she glares accusingly at him.
"Bella, I have been holding back something. I was scared to tell you at first. So much was going on when you first arrived. So much that I wanted to see how you felt about me. REALLY felt about me without all of this mystical mumbo jumbo shit." Jake's eyes grew dark as he gave flash her a painful smile.
"What do you mean Jake?" Bella knows he is about to tell her something that was important from the start. Something that he kept back from her. Something that everyone else knew from the moment she came here. She hated being the last to know something especially when it concern her.
"The day I met you in that car….something happen between us. I did what my people call imprinting. It's something we can not control. It just happens when two people who were destine to be together come in contact with one another. Its part of my being a wolf. You see you were the one. THE one who was suppose to be my other half." Jake gulps in a fresh batch of air before he continues.
"I know this is hard for you to understand since your not one of us. I mean you are but …well…you know." Jake threw his hands up in the air.
She glare at him offended by his pointing out that she was one of the only white people on the reservation so there for she was not capable of understanding their beliefs.
"I resisted you for over a year. I did not want to believe in imprinting. I did not want to think that I had no control over who I loved. It was the last thing I wanted. I did not choose to be a wolf, I sure as hell did not choose to be the Alpha. It was all forced on me. My life was content before it all happened. I was a normal Joe with a great girl and I had plans to go to college but all of that changed. It was taken away from me because my DNA demanded I make the change when those stupid ass vamps came to town." Jake's voice was deep with rage as he replayed the moment in his life when he lost all the power. His right to choose what to do with his life was raped away from him.
"I no longer had any free choices. I was thrown into a world that I thought up until then was just a legend of our people. There I was turning into some freak of nature being told that I came from a long line of chiefs and it was my privilege to be the leader. A privilege? Hell, I was just a seventeen year old kid. What did I know about being a leader! Then when I met you, I felt it. I felt the connection that Sam had already gone through. Hell, everyone knew he was madly in love with Leah and suddenly he no longer loved her, he wanted her cousin Emily instead. She was his imprint. Rather he chose it or not. I watch as he struggle with it all. I watch as Leah fell apart. So lost. I did not want that for Sienna. I thought that me being the Alpha and all I could resist it. I was stronger than fate." Jake laugh roughly as he watch Bella stare at him with hurt in her eyes.
"You did not want me." Bella's voice crack as she took a step back from him.
"I did not want the imprint Bella. I did not know you at the time. I thought…I ….was having a baby with Sienna. How could I turn my back on her?" Jake cried out as tears filled his eyes.
"Instead you turn your back on me." Bella choked on the words as it began to make sense to her. The way she could not stand the idea of Collin's hands on her after she had the baby. She thought it was due to grief but it wasn't. It was because the imprint had already taken a hold of her.
"You see an imprint makes us feel so connected. It's like no one else exists for you. You can't think or eat or breathe without them. They are the one thing that keeps you grounded. They make everything seem possible and more joyful in your life. They are the light when the wolf sends you to the darkness." Jake explains as he takes a cautious step toward her. His heart shatters when she puts her hand up in front of her to stop him from coming any closer.
"Funny, you manage to survive without me." Bella replies bitterly.
"Bella, it was harder than hell I promise you. Sienna left me cause she could see the struggle I was having with it." Jake reveals the last piece of the puzzle that he had held back from her about the reason Sienna took off. The main reason she could no longer be near him.
"Ssssooo…you want me to just simply pretend that you did not choose her over me before …well…I can't." Bella gulp hard as she watch him gasp with shock.
"Bella I did not know you then. When fate brought you to me, I wanted to see if YOU could love me and not because of this stupid imprinting thing." Jake cried out throwing his hands up in the air.
"I did love you Jake. I loved the guy who was so humble, so loving, so protective of his daughter that he had been willing to lose her to her real parents if it meant keeping her alive. Now, well…I wonder …if you kept me here because you love me or if you hoped the imprint would keep me here so you could have Lizzie in your life on a more permanent basis." Bella said.
"What? NO! I mean, yeah I knew that once we completed the imprinting you would be bound to me because that is how it is but I wanted you to want me Jake and not the wolf and the magic bullshit that came with it." Jake's voice raises in protest as he starts to see himself in her mind.
"I did not use you baby. I swear I did not want you simply because I did not want to lose our daughter. I love you Bella. Everything about you. The irony is that I see now why you were the right one for me. Everything about you is perfect for me. You are so brave, compassionate, so giving the right sort of woman I needed. I was so blinded by my own selfishness and rebellious nature that I could not see just how wrong Sienna was for me." Jake hoped like hell she would see he had been a fool and that now he was truly understanding why he was meant to be with her. Only her.
"I …need time Jake. Sorry. I just…I want to believe you. I really do." Bella drops her head as tears pour out of her eyes. Hot warm painful tears stream down her face and onto the dry ground beneath her feet.
"What can I do to make you believe me?" Jake takes fast strides toward her, wrapping his arms around her. Holding onto her so tightly.
"I don't know." She mumbles into his chest as a wave of pain engulfs her.
"Please baby don't leave me again. I can't live without you." Jake whispers as he plants kisses on top of her head.
"I'm not leaving Jake. I can't leave you. We both know that." Bella snorts as she fights her away out of his arms.
Staring up at him with eyes filled with tears, mistrust, and disappointment she turns and walks away back to the house. He follows her but keeps his distance. He can feel her need to be alone. It is killing him not knowing what she might do now that she knows that everything between them was brought together by a magical force that neither of them could fight, even if they wanted too.
