Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama. I do however own the 26 campers in this story, and any other OC's that appear unless I state otherwise.

Note: Guess what guys? We're halfway to the end! Well, more or less anyway. Point is, this is part one of the thirteenth episode so I think it counts. Things are only gonna get more crazy from here on out; I have jaw dropping moments lined up and I'm hoping you enjoy them as they come. The merge will be in a few episodes and everything will change … you'll see what I mean when we get there. University is keeping my busy, and yet I somehow found time to write this chapter. Enjoy it guys; this episode will be, overall, a lot more light hearted than the previous one was.

Knock it off with the knock offs!


The rain shower was coming to a close; the rain was only a very light drizzle at this point and was not causing anybody any rain related discomfort. The waves were quite calm and the moonlight shone brightly right through the clouds. According to the weather forecast Chris had watched it was expected that the next day would be quite sunny. Chris was currently standing on the dock of shame to give the recap. Joining him today was Heather.

"Why don't I get an umbrella?" Frowned Heather.

"I lost the other one." Stated Chris. "And it's not that bad of a rainfall, you don't need an umbrella."

"Then why do you have one?" Asked Heather.

Chris ignored this question and began his recap.

"Last time on Total Drama Tweenabet the poop hit the fan, metaphorically speaking. Donald was mad at Penta for manhandling him in the previous episode, Ivy reached her breaking point and Harvey decided to try being a villain of sorts. But the episode started off gently enough with Donald and Yoko officially starting a relationship. It shows that opposites attract." Chuckled Chris. "But things soon took a turn for the worst…"

"Ub really has been playing villainously, but it seems he went too far with Ivy. She punched one of his teeth out and planned to expose him to everybody … Ub turned it on Ivy with clever manipulation and she ran off into the woods crying like a baby." Chuckled Heather. "Excellent strategy on Ub's part, though Edith and Otis ran after Ivy to try and find her. Edith had overheard the confrontation earlier and, like the annoyance she is, wanted to expose Ub. The challenge was funny though; climb a temple wall and avoid falling."

"It was indeed a clever idea of mine!" Grinned Chris. "Tweens fell one by one, and due to playing the Harold Idol the previous episode, the Tough Tuna had to sit out three people which turned out to be Donald, Penta and Yoko, the former two now having a conflict. In the end the Tough Tuna won thanks to Xadrian. And while that was going on Edith found Ivy with help from Otis; after a heart to heart about all that Ivy had been through they hooked up … though Edith is straight and only did it to make Ivy happy. Was it the best move to make?"

"Such a little villain." Chuckled Heather. "Ub was exposed after the challenge and looked sure to go. At elimination he revealed he had three Chris Idols, one of which he was certain was real and hoped he could eliminate Ivy, or somebody else if the vote was split. The vote was not unanimous, but Ub was still voted out due to all of the idols being fakes made by Xadrian. Shame really, Ub went before his time and it'd be a good moral to kids if the villain were to win like I should have."

"Well, fifteen tweens are left and there are villains among them. We still have quite a way to go till the finals so anything could happen." Smirked Chris. "Who are you rooting for Heather?"

"I am hoping that the winner will be either Kelly, Tilly, Quadesh or Sampson. They know how to be villainous and take the game by storm. Harvey may try to be a villain, but he's terrible at it. Everyone else I don't care to acknowledge." Stated Heather.

"Well, in a season as unpredictable as this one it is indeed possible the bad guy could win … but will they? One thing is certain, you won't want to miss this episode! So, will Edith regret lying to Ivy? Will Harvey actually succeed at being a villain, or a competent player in general? Can Penta earn Donald's forgiveness? Will Kelly pick friendship or victory? Will Zanna use her Idol Radar again? How will things change now that Ub is gone? And who will be the next person voted out of the game?"

"Find out on this episode of Total Drama Tweenabet." Finished Heather. "… Can I go now? This rain is gonna mess up my hair."

"Sure. Wouldn't want hair to get ruined. It's the source of any celebrity's fame." Nodded Chris.


(Theme Song, I wanna be famous)


(Strong Squids)


Edith, Ivy and Otis were in their team's tree house shelter and were settling down after such a long day. Currently Otis was still laughing about the previous elimination.

"That was so satisfying, like … as satisfying as when Fire Lord Ozai was defeated. Did you see Ub's face when Chris slammed his mallet on his Hand? Accident or not it was crazy awesome!" Cackled Otis. "You should have been there … oh wait, you were. Awesome!"

"Good to see you're still as happy and kooky as ever." Chuckled Ivy. "And you know what? … I'm starting to feel happy and bouncy again. After a few days of being Ub's slave I'm ready to have fun; I'm actually able to focus on the snow again after spending so long worrying. It'd be the perfect end to the day if it started snowing."

"Especially if it snowed ice cream." Agreed Otis.

"Well, Ub's gone and things are really looking up … amazing how things can change so much in just one day, right Edith?" Asked Ivy.

"Indeed … things change all the time." Murmured Edith.

"What's wrong Edith? Something on your mind?" Asked Ivy. "Anything I can do to help you feel better? You've helped me so much and now it's my turn to help you."

"… Don't worry about it, I'm fine." Assured Edith uncertainly. "So, the vote wasn't unanimous; any idea who voted for you, besides Ub?"

"I have no idea." Admitted Ivy.

"I may have gotten a vote as well since I was the second to last to be pronounced safe … I suspect Sammy-boy since he's a bit crap." Said Otis casually. "But we're all still here, so who cares? Not me, I never dwell on the past."

"I get the impression you never dwell on anything." Noted Ivy.

"Now you're getting it." Nodded Otis. "So, with Ub gone and very forgettable as a person, let's choose a new target. How about Sammy-boy, or maybe we could vote out Courtney."

"Sampson could work … but I don't think we could vote out Courtney; she's an intern." Stated Edith. "In order to be voted off you have to compete; it's practically in the definition."

"Sadly I don't read the dictionary extensively so I wouldn't know." Shrugged Otis.

"Well, I think I'm gonna go to sleep; it has been quite a day." Yawned Ivy as she lay her head down on Edith's lap. "Sweetie, could you stroke my hair? It tends to help me sleep."

"Err … sure…" Agreed Edith quietly as she gently began to stroke the hair of her 'girlfriend'.

"Mmm, that's nice. Thanks white chocolate; you treat me so well." Sighed Ivy happily.

"… You're welcome dark chocolate." Replied Edith.

Otis raised an eyebrow due to noticing Edith's almost hesitant tone, but chose not to comment on this.

"Well, final fifteen. I feel good about this; fifteen is one of my seventy five lucky numbers." Said Otis in a rather cheerful tone. "If all goes then the rest of the team will running around like headless chickens on crack which will allow us to pick them off and me to mess with them without them voting for me. Been a while since I caused trouble."

"You threw tree sap at Ub yesterday." Reminded Edith.

"Like I said, a long time." Stated Otis.

A few moments later Ivy started to softly snore; it seemed that she had fallen asleep. She unconsciously nuzzled against Edith and mumbled in her slumber.

"You two go great together, just like a pancake and wasabi. Heck, if you hadn't snagged Ivy for yourself I might have made a move." Grinned Otis. "Treat her well … if not it may be the last thing you do…"

Edith looked worried before Otis laughed.

"Just kidding." Assured Otis.

"Ivy is my best friend, friends treat each other well." Replied Edith.


(Confessional: O is for Observant Otis.)

Edith: Did I do the right thing when I chose to go out with Ivy? I was so scared that she might try to harm herself … but now I'm even more worried about how she'll react when she finds out I'm straight. I'm … I'm such a hypocrite; I got mad at Ub for lying to everybody, and now I've gone and lied to Ivy about something big. My intentions are irrelevant, I've really crossed the line … I'm no different than Ub, am I? Why do I never think before I act? I'm gonna be in big trouble, and I'll deserve all of it…

Ivy: My Grandma often says that after the darkest night is the rising sun … I see what she means now. The dark night of Ub's reign has ended and the sun is rising for a new day for me and everybody else. I'm not a slave, I feel happy again and I found love, even if it's not in a way that I expected. I promise to never be the victim ever again! From now on I will stand up for myself and not let anybody push me around!

Otis: I think we should call ourselves the Valiant Vowels; cool group name, huh? I wouldn't let Ub join because he's a dick and I don't even remember the A guy … was it Arnold? Eh, not important. I noticed Edith seemed reluctant to let Ivy snuggle her, as though she was awkward and embarrassed about it … I should ask her about this. I helped her find Ivy, so she owes me a favour. If I'd been in the challenge we'd have won and Ub would still be here, and nobody wants that.


Charles and Sampson were sitting by the stream in camp; the rain had stopped now and the two boys were silently watching the water flow by as they sat on rocks. Sampson was the one to break the silence.

"Well, I didn't see that coming. I mean, I knew Ub was a bit of a troglodyte, but I had no idea he was as dumb as to blackmail somebody and expect it to actually work." Chuckled Sampson. "Meh, he's gone now and that makes things easier for me."

"How can you be so calm about this? Ub blackmailed Ivy over her sexuality! That's evil!" exclaimed Charles.

"Because it didn't affect me in any way. I feel bad for Ivy of course, but I'm only playing for myself; if somebody screws with somebody else it makes things easier for me. Besides, acknowledging Ub is more than he deserves." Shrugged Sampson.

"… You make a good point." Admitted Charles.

"I always do." Chuckled Sampson.

"That said, you could stand to be a bit more pleasant." Frowned Charles before sighing sadly.

"Bee in your bonnet?" Asked Sampson.

"… I just feel guilty for all of this. I've basically been Ub's right hand man for a lot of this contest … I can't help but feel that this could have been avoided if I'd not joined up with him. I should have followed Harvey's lead and ditched Ub." Sighed Charles in regret. "If I had known how nasty Ub was I'd have never worked with him and I'd have voted for him until he was gone. I'm a disgrace to Superman, Batman, Spiderman and every single Mr. Man!"

"I think you're overreacting." Said Sampson flatly. "Ub's gone, Ivy's ok, let it go. I'm not a saint and you're working with me."

"You're substantially more affable than Ub is." Replied Charles. "And, given how things are at the moment, we need to work together."

"Fair enough." Shrugged Sampson. "Wonder what Zanna thinks of all this."

Charles gasped in dramatic horror.

"Zanna is gonna be so mad at me!" Wailed Charles. "She won't to date a boy who worked with a Lawful Evil schemer!"

"Relax; if she wasn't mad at you for this she'd be mad at you for something else. Pretty much every couple, especially a young one, has a fight in the first week of dating. I'm surprised you haven't had an argument yet." Stated Sampson.

"… Arguments always happen in the first week?" Winced Charles nervously.

"Yep, couples fight and sometimes break up. It happens." Shrugged Sampson indifferently. "Just warning you about the inevitable."

Charles looked horrified at the thought of fighting with Zanna and the fact it was unavoidable. As he started to shake a little bit Sampson got to his feet.

"I'll see you tomorrow, I'm heading off to bed. I suggest we vote off Otis if we lose tomorrow." Stated Sampson. "I wish we had an elevator; climbing the ladder to get into the tree house is too much work."

Sampson walked off and left Charles by himself.

"… I have got to make sure me and Zanna never fight. I'll show her how much I love her!" Exclaimed Charles. "Then she'll have no reason to fight with me!"


(Confessional: This can't end well…)

Sampson: Why couldn't we have saved me some effort and built the tree house on the ground? Well, annoying effort aside it seems things are going pretty good for me at the moment; I have allies and no target on my back. Laziness is clearly more efficient than obsessive strategy … take notes Ub.

Charles: Couples fight? I had no idea it was supposed to happen in the first week! I'll shower Zanna is love and affection; she'll be happy, we won't fight and everyone will be a winner! … I just hope I'm not too late; a break up would shatter my heart into a million and six pieces. I want us to turn out better than Romeo and Juliet!


Harvey and Tilly were both sitting in a tree; both were discussing the recent elimination of Ub and they both had differing opinions on it.

"I am so glad that little rat is gone." Said Tilly in satisfaction. "This game will be better without him. I'm just glad things turned out the way we wanted."

"… Wait, you wanted Ub gone?" Blinked Harvey.

"Duh, he was being abusive to an LGBT girl and I can't have that." Replied Tilly. "Wait … oh geez, you voted for Ivy didn't you?"

"It was the best move to make; everyone liked her and she'd be a threat due to that. You told me to make a move if I saw it and that it's not evil if it doesn't hurt anyone." Explained Harvey. "I thought you were doing the same and just acting in order to throw the others off. "

"Harvey … there is a time for being strategic, and a time to make the sicko's pay. Ub actually hurt Ivy with his strategy and thus he deserved to be voted off. Ivy was the victim and deserved to stay. She may be a threat, but it is a matter of principle since we still have the majority if Charles and Sampson are still with us." Explained Tilly.

"I evidently still have a lot to learn about strategy." Noted Harvey. "I'm just glad that I have got allies to back me up."

"Indeed, but you're trying and that's what important. But in the future, maybe we could discuss moves together?" Suggested Tilly. "We're going to the finals together after all."

"We sure are!" Grinned Harvey. "By the way, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, go ahead." Shrugged Tilly. "Just don't ask me about my weight."

"I wasn't going to." Assured Harvey. "I was just wondering … since you're pansexual, when did you come out, and when did you realise your orientation?"

"I came out a few months ago and basically I just had a crush on a girl while also seeing boys as attractive … I realised I was pansexual when I started to see people of many identities as very attractive. Nothing special really." Shrugged Tilly.

"I'm surprised you don't talk about it more." Noted Harvey.

"I don't let my sexuality define me." Stated Tilly. "My parents and bros haven't exactly 'come around' yet, so I prefer to not make it totally obvious. It's just the way I feel; I wish my parents would realise that…"

"I'm sure they'll accept it soon enough." Assured Harvey.

"They'd better; I'm gonna prove exactly why I am the best, and they'll have no choice but to accept and admire me!" Declared Tilly. "So, who should we vote out next time we lose?"

"I'm not sure, but definitely somebody in the minority since I don't want to put you at risk if we vote off Sampson or Charles … this is kinda mean, but it's not hurting anybody so I think it's legal." Deciding Harvey. "We could look for an idol as well if we get the time."

"Sounds like a plan." Nodded Tilly.


(Confessional: Things NEVER go according to plan … unless you're a villain in TD Canon.)

Harvey: You know, I think I have a shot at winning … a good shot even. I mean, I have a fin al two deal with Tilly, an extending alliance with Sampson and Charles … not to mention that Donald and Larry think I'm in their respective alliances … huh, never expecting to be in such a powerful position. Go me! And maybe I could vote off Charles next; that'd be such an unexpected move!

Tilly: Harvey is really starting to take this game seriously … it's actually rather hot! But I don't want him overshadowing me and taking over. Fortunately he relays almost everything to me, so I'll be fine. Ah, it feels great to be safe and in no danger at all.


(Tough Tuna)


Larry, Penta and Xadrian were in the cave by the waterfall and were settling down for the night. Before they settled down to sleep, they were talking about shipping … it was Penta who had started this conversation.

"There are couples everywhere if you look hard enough. It's all about finding chemistry and using your imagination." Said Penta cheerfully. "For example, I think Otis and Quadesh would be adorable together."

"That'd never happen, they have nothing in common." Stated Larry.

"That's exactly what makes it shippable. And it's not just them who would be a good couple; some good 'in theory' couples I've thought of include Charles and Mist, and also Kelly and Xadrian."

"Me and K'lly? That'd n'ver happen. Ah ain't exactly boyfriend m'terial." Admitted Xadrian.

"True love will find a way if you want it enough." Said Penta before giggling naughtily. "But if you ask me, you two would go well together."

Larry and Xadrian both looked horrified.

"I like girls." Insisted Larry.

"That's s'ck!" Gagged Xadrian.

"Nothing wrong with a little yaoi; boys like yuri after all. What's the difference?" Teased Penta.

Larry and Xadrian were silent since Penta had a good point.

"Ah gots an idea fur a ship; how 'bout you and Donald? If he weren't datin' Yoko, you and him could go well together; you and your army trainin' would protect him fr'm harm." Chuckled Xadrian.

"That won't happen; he hates me." Sighed Penta sadly.

"Hate is a strong word." Said Larry gently.

"Well … he still highly dislikes me. I know I can't be liked by everybody, but since I'm Yoko's best friend and Donald is Yoko's boyfriend we're gonna probably be seeing a lot of each other … and it'd create a lot of conflict if we were enemies…"

"The best thing you can do is to just give him some time and space." Suggested Larry. "You can't force forgiveness."

"I know … I wish I could control my emotions better, but my protective instincts are too high for my own good." Muttered Penta.

"But they're high enough for the good of others." Pointed out Larry. "We won't have to worry about anything while you're here to protect us."

"He's right ya kn'w." Added Xadrian. "Ya'll are like a bodyguard o' some k'nd. An', in mah opinion, ah r'ckon L'rry likes tough girls. Might explain 'zactly why he th'nks ya'll are sexy."

"Dude! Quiet!" Hissed Larry.

"That ain't gonna do any g'd, P'nta heard me." Smirked Xadrian.

"So … I'm sexy, am I?" Smirked Penta with half lidded eyes and an amused demeanour.

"Platonically!" Insisted Larry.

"How can ya'll call someb'dy platonically sexy? Ain't th't a contr'diction?" Asked Xadrian. "J'st an hour ago befur Penta arrived ya'll mention ya'll liked her butt and legs."

Larry had turned rather red and Penta looked very amused.

"… Well, I'm gonna take my rather embarrassed ass elsewhere." Said Larry while looking as though he were sunburnt.

Larry took his leave while Penta glanced at Xadrian.

"Not that I mind knowing Larry finds me attractive, but any reason you were embarrassing him like that?" Asked Penta.

"He likes you a mighty l't an' ah bet ya'll like h'm a fair b't too. Might as w'll save us s'm time 'n skip the nervous jitters p'rt o' a romance." Shrugged Xadrian. "I th'nk ya w'd both be happier k'ds if ya got together an' m'd it official. Maybe ya'll c'd tell him via role play with ya toys or somethin'."

"… You've given me a lot to think about." Mused Penta.


(Confessional: Xadrian sure can make things awkward when he wants to.)

Xadrian: M'ybe ah did embarrass L'rry a b't … but he ain't g'nna be complainin' when he's locking lips w'th P'enta. Ah ain't g't m'ch interest in datin', but ah ain't g'nna stop L'rry if he wants ta make out w'th Penta. St'll, if he's distracted by romance, th'n ah gots ta foc's on tha strategy departm'nt … good th'ng ah gots comm'n sense, huh?

Larry: Well, that was certainly embarrassing. Xadrian either cannot keep a secret, or he likes trolling me. Did he really have to tell Penta that I think she's sexy? Oh ja, this'll make the next tea party very awkward…

Penta: As a serious and calm preteen girl I can honestly say that … O-M-G! Larry finds me sexy! This is like, awesome! Eeeiiiii!


Donald and Yoko were sitting by the campfire; it was dark, but the burning fire kept them warm and illuminated the area around them. Yoko was currently feeling some ire towards Ub; the revelation of his less than moral strategy had upset her a bit.

"I can't believe somebody would stoop as low as to emotionally hurt somebody in such a mean way. Is winning really worth hurting innocent people? Even if Ub won, would the money be worth the consequences he'd inevitably receive when he gets home?" Asked Yoko. "I feel relieved I was never allied with him."

"Same. And sadly Yoko, people often resort to underhanded tricks when money is involved. It corrupts people. Ub may be that nasty outside the game, but I don't know enough about him to confirm or deny that suspicion. Point is, like I've said before, hardball play is expected." Said Donald while gently stroking Yoko's back.

"I know, but it's still not right. I mean, it's expected, but it's not in the rulebook that we have to." Pouted Yoko. "Grandmaster Fong says there is no excuse to hurt people as nobody has a 'right' to be mean to somebody else. Every day I learn more things about the world I'd rather not … but at the same time I learn things I am glad to know. Comic relief sounds lovely, and the Olympics sound like a lot of fun … do you think I could enter them?"

"We'll see … though since you've lived in China all your life, you'd be playing for a different country than what I support." Said Donald. "Come to think of it, if things really do become serious between us like I hope they will, then you'd need to apply for citizenship in Canada … that or I'd apply for Chinese Citizenship."

"That sounds complicated." Noted Yoko.

"Eh, I'll just ask dad to help; he's good with negotiations. It's how my family stays on top of the heap." Stated Donald. "And you'd be involved in public things if we're going to have a real relationship … are you ok with crowds?"

"I think so." Nodded Yoko. "Gee, it's like I'm getting a whole new family … though I'll never truly part with Grandmaster Fong."

"I wouldn't expect you to." Assured Donald while tossing more wood onto the fire. "Also, I have a question … would you ever consider tracking down your birth parents?"

"Why do you ask?" Inquired Yoko.

"Well, when you're as rich as my family with connections like my parents have … things can be made possible. A sprinkle of money here and there and we may be able to find your parents. A few DNA tests, some research, a bit of tracking and questioning locals around where they've been spotted … and then we'll have a family reunion for you." Smiled Donald. "How about it, want to meet the people who bought you into this world?"

"… You'd do that for me?" Whispered Yoko.

"Clearly I would, it's what I'm offering." Smirked Donald, before adding. "And I truly care about you; our relationship is still young, so we might as well start it off on the right foot, you know?"

Yoko was silent before she embraced Donald and kissed him sweetly. After a few moment of soft kissing they parted.

"Donald … you are awesome, if that's the right word. But … I don't know if I really, well, need to know my true parents. They gave me up for a reason I'm sure … Grandmaster Fong is my true parent. And I'm sure your family will welcome me with open arms … if they're as nice as you." Said Yoko while looking up at the moon. "I may wonder who my mummy and daddy are sometimes … but maybe it is better that way; I may be disappointed with what I find. Maybe I'll change my mind … but I think I'm truly happy right here and right now."

"If that's how you feel." Nodded Donald in understanding. "It may be a challenge to integrate you into my lifestyle from what you're used to, but it'll happen … my family has some lawyers even I wouldn't dare to cross…"

"What's a lawyer?" Asked Yoko.

"A creature so dark and vile that once you make eye contact with one you'll never be the same again and may lose the ability to breath." Said Donald simply.

"… Sounds scary." Shivered Yoko.


(Confessional: So, according to Donald it seems lawyers are like Slenderman … makes perfect sense to me!)

Donald: Due to our differing countries of origin as well as differing lifestyles, there a number of things me and Yoko have to think about, like citizenship, getting Yoko into a school, getting her used to things most people consider commonplace … not to mention explaining what the internet is. It'll be a challenge, but I'm up for it ... this is assuming of course she ever decides to move to Canada with me.

Yoko: Grandmaster Fong once said that true happiness is to want nothing … I see what he means now. I truly have everything I could ever want.


Kelly and Quadesh were walking through the dark forest; Quadesh was holding a flaming torch to light the way and Kelly was making sure to stick close to her.

"Scared of the dark?" Asked Quadesh.

"Not exactly; I'd just rather not get lost in the darkness." Replied Kelly. "And I won't be able to look for idols in darkness very easily; I don't have great night vision."

"It'd be cool if we had some night vision glasses; it'd make things much easier for us." Mused Quadesh. "I could really go for a cup of Joe about now."

"Who calls coffee a 'cup of Joe' anymore?" Asked Kelly.

"My daddy, and therefore so do I." Stated Quadesh simply. "Also, if we find any idols, how will we know if they are real or not?"

"I was thinking of having Geoff identify if they are real or not." Stated Kelly. "He's an intern and the head of our camp, so I'd assume he knows how to tell the real ones from the fakes."

"Good idea." Nodded Quadesh. "But are we going to find any idols?"

"Well, I've had the Ezekiel Idol since the camping challenge." Stated Kelly. "With luck we may find another one tonight. Shine the light over here; I think I see something."

Quadesh did as she was asked and shone the light towards what looked like a rabbit hole.

"Kelly, that's a rabbit hole." Said Quadesh flatly.

"I know, but given the size of the entrance and the fact it's deep from a first glance I think it's possible that there might be an idol in it." Replied Kelly as she got on all fours and stuck her arm into the rabbit hole. "Aha! I got something!"

Kelly pulled out an idol and looked at it; it was the Lindsey Idol, or possibly a copy of it.

"If this and the Ezekiel Idol are real, then we might be able to pull off a big move and vote out a big threat the next time we lose." Said Kelly hopefully.

"Who did you have in mind?" Asked Quadesh. "I suggest Larry; he could be dangerous come the merge."

"Maybe … but we haven't lost yet, so we mustn't get ahead of ourselves." Replied Kelly. "But we'll have to fracture dangerous alliances and make an impact; these idols will only work once."

"Can we do it with just two votes on our side?" Asked Quadesh.

"I used to live on a farm down south; I know how to herd the cattle." Assured Kelly.


(Confessional: Idol get! … Unless it's fake of course.)

Quadesh: … Since when did Kelly become so devious?

Kelly: If these idols are both real then I might be able to, in essence, decide who we eliminate next. Yoko is a big threat … then again, I can still fall back to her and Penta. Larry could work, though Penta would be mad … should I eliminate Penta? I'm gonna have to do it eventually; no way could I win against her. Friends are nice, but family is better. Regardless of my personal attachment to them, they'll have to go eventually. In an ideal world I'd face off against Sampson in the finals … but I'm not holding out hope for that.


(Neutral Zone)


Zanna arrived at the Neutral Zone; she was hoping that Charles would there for their usual 'Midnight Meeting'. No sooner had she began searching for her boyfriend a voice called to her.

"Hi Zanna! Over here! I've got a present for you!" Called Charles.

Zanna spotted Charles sitting under one of the trees; with a smile on her face she approached her love and sat down next to him. After giving Charles a peck on the cheek Zanna spoke.

"A present for me? That's so sweet." Smiled Zanna. "I'm feeling worried about my place on my team lately, so that's very thoughtful of you."

"It's my pleasure. I'm your boyfriend and it's my job to dote on you, serve you and treat you like royalty." Assured Charles quickly. "And if I do my job well, what reason is there to feel bad about anything, right?"

Zanna raised an eyebrow; Charles sounded a little nervous.

"Are you ok Charles; you sound kinda … jumpy." Noted Zanna.

"I'm fine, totally fine, very fine … nothing to fight about, no sir, err, Ma'am!" Assured Charles. "Anyway, here's your present."

Charles reached into his pockets and took out a necklace; it was made with some fine thread and had a wooden carving of a fish attached to it. He handed it to Zanna and looked relived that she was smiling happily.

"I finished it about three minutes before you got here; I hope you like it. I mean, you like fishing and girls usually like accessories … do you like it? If you don't then I'm very sorry and I'll do better next time!" Promised Charles.

"Calm down Charles, I love it!" Squeed Zanna as she put the necklace on. "Thank you!"

"You like it? Phew, that's a big relief, let me tell you." Said Charles with a relieved sigh. "You can expect a lot more presents in the coming days; you're special to me and I'm gonna show you just how much I care."

Before Zanna could respond to this Charles continued speaking.

"My team voted off Ub since he was too horrid to keep around. But don't worry, you can still count on me and Sampson. Any idea who your team might vote out next?" Asked Charles.

"Well, maybe me … but I have the Noah Idol so I'll be ok, though using it is a big risk. If not me … it could be anybody; I really don't know who would be voted off." Admitted Zanna.

"I hate all the uncertainty." Sighed Charles. "This game is so complicated."

"It's sad, but true." Agreed Zanna.


(Confessional: I'd say Trouble in Paradise … but Wawanakwa is hardly a paradise in the first place.)

Charles: In addition to worrying that Zanna and me might not last as a couple, now I'm worried she might get voted off! Even with the idol she may go; what if somebody pulls a fast one on her and she doesn't play the idol? Oh man, I feel more stressed and worried than when my gym teacher forced me to play dodge ball against a team of ten … I had no team mates. If this is what growing up feels like then I don't like it!

Zanna: Charles is definitely worried about something … I expect it is nerves due to fearing that I might be voted off. He's so sweet, but he shouldn't worry so much. At least he doesn't have to worry about our status as a couple; he knows I'd never leave him … doesn't he?


(Strong Squids)


Edith was sitting on a tree stump outside of camp by herself. After all that had happened recently she wanted to have a bit of time to herself. Currently she was watching the clouds and enjoying the shade that the forest canopy provided her with.

"Lovely weather … than again, being albino that just means I'm gonna have to apply more sunscreen than usual." Mused Edith. "Well, final fifteen … maybe I can make the merge if I keep going as I am. I just hope the fighting and scheming comes to an end soon; with Ub gone it might ease up a little … I hope."

As Edith sat quietly and relaxed peacefully she heard somebody clear their throat. She looked around but saw nobody; a moment later somebody spoke.

"They say a cockroaches favourite food is the glue on the back of stamps; isn't that absurd?" Asked Otis from a branch of a nearby tree.

"Oh, hi Otis." Greeted Edith. "Am I disturbing you? I could go somewhere else if you want."

"Nah, no need. You got here before me since I was following you." Replied Otis.

"… You were following me? That's … kinda creepy." Noted Edith.

Otis jumped down from his branch and walked over to Edith.

"Maybe so, but in all actuality it's only creepy because 'the man' forces us to think the way that he wants to." Shrugged Otis. "Anyway, I want to talk to you about something … something serious."

"What is it?" Asked Edith nervously.

"… Why are you pretending to love Ivy? It's rather dishonest y'know." Frowned Otis. "Don't deny it; I saw how awkward you looked last night when Ivy snuggled up to you. A lesbian or bisexual girl would have liked it. I can appreciate messing with people, but after all Ivy has done through that's just … wrong, know what I mean?"

"… I just wanted to make my friend happy; I was scared she'd be irreversibly depressed if I didn't." Winced Edith. "I was being a good friend."

"By lying to Ivy? Good intentions or not it's still a lie. I mean, Ub lied a lot as well and pretended to be her friend. You on the other hand are pretending to be her girlfriend which is even worse." Frowned Otis with a disapproving tone. "You do know you'll have to tell her the truth eventually, right? How do you think she'll react when you tell her?"

"… Well … oh, I have no excuse..." Mumbled Edith. "But you've done bad things too; you always pride yourself on being a trouble maker."

"True, but I'm honest about the fact I can be a jerk and I never lied about who I am. I fully acknowledge I'm a flawed person. You however seem to think you are as big a Mary Sue as Bella Swan … not something to be proud of." Lectured Otis. "How do you think your parents will react?"

"… I didn't think about that…" Murmured Edith nervously.

"If you ask me, we might be seeing a red moon on the night you your return to your home, if you get my drift." Chuckled Otis.

Edith looked scared at the thought of such a horrid punishment.

"… What can I do? I try to be good since I'm so scared of punishments and being shunned for being bad, but nobody is perfect. I've really done a bad thin g this time…" Sniffled Edith.

"What can you do? Easy! Admit you are as flawed as everybody else and let loose and be naughty. You'll be a lot happier if you let yourself go a bit." Suggested Otis. "And who better to teach you how to be a trouble maker than me? I mean, I'm like the God of Chaos in human form!"

"Why do you want to help me? I thought you were mad at me." Said Edith as she stood up.

"Oh, I am and I expect the fans will be too. But, that being said, I can see potential in you and I think you'll be a much happier girl if you let go of your morals and just me the girl you should be, not the girl that society wants you to be." Explained Otis.

"… Ok … can you please teach me to be a bad girl?" Asked Edith politely.

"First lesson, don't ask for things politely; people will be able to deny you stuff a lot easier. Demand things of them and if they treat you like a push-over, than five them the once-over!" Declared Otis. "Oh, and I expect you to tell Ivy the truth within a week. It'll only be worse if you put it off."

"Ok … I'll try." Nodded Edith.


(Confessional: Otis was inevitable gonna corrupt somebody eventually.)

Otis: I've never been one for authority or obeying teachers, but I expect Edith to pay full attention during class. Hypocritical I know, but if you think about it, who isn't?

Edith: This is karma, but I deserve it. I'm always trying to be good since I just have a fear of being in trouble … maybe this will be for the best. But … how will I tell Ivy the truth? Otis said that for 'homework' he wants me to think of five ways I am flawed and tell him what they are by sunset. Something tells me I'm gonna be learning a lot about myself in the coming days, if I even last that long…


Ivy was sitting in the treehouse looking out a window at the forest all around. She was smiling and felt infinitely better than she had been for the past few days.

"Like I said last night, it's always darkest before dawn, and now I have found the sunrise of a new day … gee, I'm getting all philosophical." Giggled Ivy. "I think nothing can stop me now!"

"Best not to get overconfident; it tempts fate to kick you in your non-existent gonads." Cautioned Tilly as she climbed into the treehouse. "That being said, it's good to see you're happy again. If I'd known what Ub was doing to you I'd have made sure he'd leave the island with an arm in a sling."

"Thanks Tilly, but I'm fine now … though I'd have probably been better off if I just came out at the start, but … you know, nerves and such." Said Ivy as she turned to face Tilly.

"I can understand that; coming out as pansexual wasn't easy for me." Agreed Tilly.

"You like girls too?" Asked Ivy.

"I like everyone." Shrugged Tilly.

"I see. Well, at this point I'd prefer it if my sexuality was known but not spoken of. I don't want it to define me." Said Ivy with finger motions. "I'm more than that. I mean, I like video games as well, especially the Professor Layton series."

"I know what you mean; stereotyping is wrong." Nodded Tilly. "Anyway, I'd like to give you a little warning. You, Edith and Otis seem to be in the minority and thus are in danger of elimination. I want you to know that I'll try to spread the target to Otis first, then Edith … sorry I can't do more, but I have to look out for myself first."

"… Well, that's made my morning turn sour." Frowned Ivy.

"It's the nature of the game." Shrugged Tilly. "It wasn't my idea anyway; Sampson and Charles want you gone, not me. My advice, find an idol."

"… Thanks for the heads up." Sighed Ivy.

"Any time." Replied Tilly.


(Confessional: Tilly, always the bearer of bad news.)

Tilly: After yesterday's muy loco fiasco nobody is certain what will be happening next on our team … and I don't like that. If I can keep the target off myself and Harvey then I'll be fine. I want to get in good with Ivy because if her alliance takes a hit then I can be a swing vote, and if mine takes a hit then me and Harvey can just jump ship and work things out from there. Shouldn't be too hard; those three in the minority aren't exactly strategists of the year, you know?

Ivy: Out of one hole and into another … well, at least me and my snowflake aren't the first target of the majority. I wish it would snow; that'd take my mind off things … but building a snowman won't keep me safe from elimination. I'm no strategy wiz, I'm better at just trying hard at the challenges. Hopefully Edith and Otis will know what to do.


Sampson was laying down on the ground and was trying to relax in the sunshine. I say 'trying' because Charles was pacing nervously and speaking about his worries which was preventing Sampson from sleeping.

"Will you kindly shut your noise hole?" Requested Sampson dully. "I am trying to get some sleep."

"How can you sleep at a time like this? In addition to worry about me and Zanna's future as a couple, I also have to worry about her being voted off! How can you be so calm?" Exclaimed Charles.

"Well the main reason is that she is not my girlfriend." Stated Sampson. "And that's ignoring the fact I am more concerned with winning the big cash prize than I am with having a summer romance. Honestly, why is it that love makes people go so stupid? I'm thankful to be immune to such balderdash."

"I want to win too … I'd just rather that Zanna was safe. I mean, she has the Noah Idol … but it may not be enough." Murmured Charles.

"How so? It protects her from the votes and then she'll be on our team." Droned Sampson with a roll of his eyes.

"Yeah … but, what if she doesn't play it at the right time? Or, what if she doesn't like it on our team and the others are mean to her?" Murmured Charles. "I'm just so worried for the future."

"Death smiles at us all … all we can do is smile back." Stated Sampson. "In other words, you can't fight fate."

"… Challenge accepted." Declared Charles. "We can make this work; we just need to survive a few more rounds of elimination and do what we must to achieve that. The merge can't be far away now; heck, it may even be today."

"Don't assume anything." Advised Sampson.

"Hi guys!" Greeted Harvey as he walked up. "What are you talking about?"

"Just stuff, nothing you need to worry about; it is my worry alone." Stated Charles. "Need anything?"

"I was just gonna ask, who should we vote off next?" Asked Harvey. "Maybe Otis because, you know, he's quick and crazy and, well, that makes him a threat, I think. But we could bluff about having all the idols in the game, spread the seeds of doubt into the fertile field of worry … or something like that. Or maybe we could pretend to end our alliance of four so that we can catch them unawares. Cool plan huh?"

"… I find it hypocritical that you used to hate strategy and now you're going overboard with it." Said Sampson flatly.

"People change. I've come to learn I was looking at things the wrong way." Shrugged Harvey. "And I'm not gonna hurt people like Ub did, so I'm not exactly being a bully or anything."

"… Eh, not my business." Shrugged Sampson.

"Harvey makes a good point; we need idols. I'm gonna go and look for one; catch you guys later." Announced Charles.

Charles took off running into the forest while Harvey and Sampson exchanged a glance.

"Is he worried about Zanna?" Asked Harvey.

"Who else." Said Sampson flatly. "Anyway, congrats on accepting strategy is useful. You could be quite the villain if you try hard enough."

"I'm not a villain!" Yelled Harvey. "I'm just trying to play the game!"

"That's the pot calling the kettle black." Said Sampson as he yawned and stretched out. "If you need me I'll be sleeping … so don't need me."

"… Well, err, you stink and you're lazy." Replied Harvey as he took his leave.

"Ah, silence." Said Sampson in relief.


(Confessional: A professional insulter, Harvey is not.)

Harvey: Ok, maybe I could have handled that better … but I'm not a villain. I'd rather not be compared to Ub, it makes me feel like Squidward. But at least I'm finally playing a good game, right?

Sampson: … Remind me again how Harvey made it this far? There's being lucky and then there's having a higher power cheating for you … meh, paranoia or not I'm still gonna win.

Charles: (He proudly holds up the Geoff Idol). Success! Well, sort of. This idol only lets me watch a ceremony of the other team … but it's still useful; I can learn stuff and provide Zanna with moral support. Question is, what more can I do?


(Tough Tuna)


At the campfire of the Tough Tuna's campsite, Quadesh was sitting on a log and looked to be in thought. Kelly had left a minute ago to get Geoff to look at the idols and see if they were real or not. This meant that Quadesh had some time to think to herself.

"Fifteen of us are left; that means it's nearly the halfway point and thus is nearly the merge … I'm gonna need some form of power if I am to spearhead the post merge. I've got Kelly, but who else? This game is about power and I have only got one ally … maybe two if Tilly is still with me. How am I to take control if everybody is already in solid alliances? … I'm gonna have to be smart and devious … who should be eliminated to fracture the opposition?" Monologued Quadesh in her thoughts.

Quadesh looked at the unlit fire and frowned.

"I refuse to get voted off before the merge; I'd never live it down." Said Quadesh in determination.


(Confessional: Our future political leader ladies and gentlemen!)

Quadesh: I fear that lately I'm becoming … irrelevant. It seems to be that other people are making the moves, not me … and I cannot let that happen. I want to be the one dominating the game like how Pikachu dominates Team Rocket in combat. But to pull off any real moves I will need allies. Question is … who is there left to ally with? Penta is ok I guess, but she's inseparable from Yoko and she'll inevitably side with her and Larry over everybody else ... such a conundrum…


As Quadesh sat down lost in her thoughts Zanna walked over and sat on a different log; judging by the music coming from her cell phone she was playing Candy Crush. The 'love it or hate it' soundtrack of the game jerked Quadesh out of her thoughts and she noticed she had company. After a few moments of consideration Quadesh spoke.

"Hey Zanna, you got a minute?" Asked Quadesh.

"What's up?" Asked Zanna as she looked up from her app game.

"Ok, here's the facts; I need allies and I know for a fact that you do since you seem to prefer being the next Metal Gear agent than you do being in a strong alliance … so, want to join up with me and Kelly? We've got a good thing going on and assuming certain things are confirmed for us we might be able to turn the tide in the very near future. You in? Keep in mind that if you say no I cannot promise that we won't go for you after whoever our first target is." Warned Quadesh.

"Umm … sure, I'll join." Shrugged Zanna. "Besides, I owe Kelly a favour for helping me out when Joanne tried to take advantage of me."

"You guys talking about me? Good things I hope." Said Kelly as she walked up. "Good news Quadesh, the … Zanna, sorry, but I need to talk to Quadesh alone."

"Don't worry Kelly, she's on our side." Assured Quadesh. "And she'll stay with us and not backstab us, right Zanna?"

Before Zanna could respond to this Kelly interrupted.

"Don't scare her Quadesh; you have a habit of making people feel nervous." Chastised Kelly. "Anyway, since Zanna is now on our side … I can officially say to both of you that the Ezekiel and Lindsey Idols we have are both real. Next time we lose we'll have total control."

"Nice to know I won't have to worry about getting the boot … but even if we'll have control, let's not throw the challenge, it's just asking for trouble." Stated Quadesh.

"I agree." Nodded Kelly. "I have ideas for targets in mind; we'll just have to pick the best option sooner rather than later. It's like momma used to say, procrastination is a friend of one's enemy. Given we used to live on a farm down south, procrastination was not tolerated and would be punished via the slipper."

"Charming." Winced Quadesh. "So, if people are mad at us for whatever it is we'll do, what would we do after that?"

"You're a politician-to-be, you figure it out." Shrugged Kelly.

"… This is gonna be a long summer." Groaned Zanna at the camera.


(Confessional: As long as the green mile … it's a very long garden.)

Quadesh: This has worked out pretty good. My alliance has some idols to do damage with and I have a new ally who is the type to not talk much and also seems kinda … well … submissive. Things are looking up; time to show the power of politics and an iron fist! … I hope Mist and daddy won't be mad, but desperate times call for even desperate-er measures! Of course, I could just win the challenge and have an evening of relaxation, but assuming victory is inevitable is always a bad idea.

Kelly: I think I'm all set for my next game move … I just need to summon my courage and actually do it. I'm hoping to win since that's better for everyone … but if not, it'll be Yoko, Larry or Penta being voted out … this won't be as easy a decision as I originally thought. I wonder if the other team is having just as many troubles as we are?

Geoff: My team is always running high on emotions. According to the 'plot logic' of fiction it means they might go to elimination … then again, other books say it's just a fake-out to the viewers. But, how does that kind of thing work in reality TV in real life? … Eh, I'll just ask Bridgette.


Donald was sitting in the cave; Yoko had gone off to hang out with other members of the team and Donald was making use of his free time. Currently he was using dirt to paint a picture on the cave wall. He may have hated dirt, but it was worth the pretty end result.

"Cave painting … it is truly a sophisticated and refined art method; it shows that even cave people had class." Mused Donald as he stepped back and admired his work.

"Th't it does." Agreed Xadrian as he walked up. "Ah pers'nally th'nk orchestral music is tha m'st refined art, but ta each their own."

"How do you know about orchestral music?" Asked Donald.

"Ah may be poor, but ah ain't got any lack o' classiness." Stated Xadrian. "Anyway, class or no class, ah gots somethin' ta talk to ya'll about."

"What is it?" Asked Donald while turning his full attention to Xadrian.

"Ah want ta kn'w, how safe do ya feel in th's game?" Inquired Xadrian.

"I feel secure at the moment." Nodded Donald.

"Adding to th't, do ya th'nk Yoko is safe?" Asked Xadrian craftily. "Ah mean, she nearly went out tha oth'r day. Chances are th't it'll happ'n sooner or later if ya ain't caref'l."

"Nobody would vote Yoko off." Said Donald confidently.

"Do ya really believe th't? She ain't great at strategy, I'll give ya th't, but she's nice an' ain't got enemies. Chances are she'll be targ'ted due ta being nice soon'r or lat'r." Said Xadrian calmly. "Ah'm here ta warn ya 'bout th't possibility. Ah can't say it'll happen right now, but ah know how people w'rk an' Yoko is making herself a t'rget j'st by bein' who she is … a pure heart'd maiden."

"You … you don't know that for certain." Stammered Donald.

"Maybe not." Conceded Xadrian. "Th't said, you ain't certain ah am wrong wither, are ya'll? Chances are you'll have to be on your toes or you and y'r lady love may become an island ap'rt."

"What should I do?" Exclaimed Donald in worry.

"S'mple, take th's." Said Xadrian as he pressed a Chris Idol into Donald's hands.

"But … why?" Asked Donald.

"Are ya g'nna look a gift horse in tha mouth?" Asked Xadrian simply.

"Fair point, but … is it real?" Asked Donald.

"Beats me. We'll j'st have to hope for tha b'st." Said Xadrian simply. "An' in ret'rn fur th's, ah would appreciate it if ya w'd refrain from voting f'r me in tha near future."

"Can do." Nodded Donald.


(Confessional: Love makes people paranoid.)

Donald: This game would be easier if I was only looking out for myself … but like the gentleman I am, I aspire to also keep my lady love safe as well. It's not easy, but if it means spending more time with Yoko then I'll do it. It needlessly complicates things, but such is love. I'm sure I could pass the target onto somebody else if need be. At least I can ensure Yoko's safety for one round … gee, this would be easier if Yoko had any idea how to play strategically. But I guess the fact she plays in a different way than the norm is an admirable quality.

Xadrian: I had to lie and mislead Donald a l'ttle. Ah mean, he's a big threat ta me and ah dun't w'nt him ta be thinkin' clearly or he could hurt mah game. All it takes is some subtle m'nipulation an' a fake idol an' he goes doo-lally. Ah w'll admit it w's mean, but ah dun't really care too m'ch since D'nald is already rich as rain; he ain't g'nna mind losin'. Ah however need th't money. Ah'm mighty affable a lotta tha time, but ah need ta be devious ta g't by then ah'll do it. Mah pappy told me its j'st how th'ngs are, and his word is mah code.


Yoko, Penta and Larry were sitting by the river near the edge of the campsite. They were relaxing in the warm sunshine since they knew that, inevitably, there would be another rainy day at some point in the near future. Yoko had taken off her sandals and had dipped her feet into the cool river water.

"This reminds me of being back home at the Monastery. I love swimming in the river and the shallow parts of the lake. It makes me miss my home more than ever." Sighed Yoko wistfully. "Do you guys miss your homes as well?"

"I do. I may not always get along with my parents and I may not like the army training … but after being away from them for so long, I've come to realise that, disagreements or not, I love them unconditionally and I miss them dearly." Agreed Penta. "Do you miss your family Larry?"

"I don't know." Shrugged Larry.

"… How can you not know?" Asked Penta with a confused coy look.

"My parents are never home, they are always away at work. I'm stuck indoors with the maid all the time. I troll on x-box due to all the boredom. I've just gotten used to my parents never being around. I haven't actually seen them in months, what's a few more weeks on top of that?" Shrugged Larry.

"That sounds really upsetting." Said Penta sympathetically.

"Does it make you sad?" Asked Yoko gently.

"Not really, I'm used to it." Lied Larry.

"… You're lying." Said Penta softly and gently. "You are sad you don't have your parents around to support you and guide you."

"… I can't lie to you Penta; yes, it's true … but they have jobs, it's just how things are. Why try to change what cannot be altered? They are married to each other and their work as well. They don't even know I'm on this show most likely; if the maid told them then I doubt they'd tune in to watch. I had to sneak out the house to get to the pre-show interview." Explained Larry.

"… You ran away from home?!" Exclaimed Penta in shock.

"No, I did not. I'm gonna go back after I win, so it's not like it really counts." Assured Larry. "I needed something to do, and if mum and dad worry … eh, at least they'll have to make time for me."

"This is a sad conversation." Noted Yoko. "So many people on this show have personal problems. Donald is a bit of a worried and sad guy sometimes, but at least his parents love him so much."

"I'm sure my parents love me Yoko, they just have no time for me." Stated Larry. "Anyway, enough about my personal life. Let's just enjoy the sunshine and free time before the challenge starts. We all know Chris hates going easy on us."

"That's true." Admitted Penta. "And Larry, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure." Shrugged Larry.

"… Since you find me sexy, which part of my body do you find most attractive? My bum? Would a shake of it cheer you up, you handsome boy you?" Teased Penta with a goofy grin.

Larry was silent and he blushed a shade of scarlet.

"Grandmaster Fong always did say that red is the colour of love … that and utter humiliation." Giggled Yoko.


(Confessional: Grandmaster Fong was a kid once too you know!)

Penta: Larry acts tough and … well, he probably is tough … but that being said, I think he's more sensitive than he likes to let on. Why do all the cute boys have to be so sad inside? I'd try to play the role of being his comforting big sister … but then if we started dating he'd be dating a sister and that's just gross.

Larry: I prefer to keep my personal life separate from my 'summer vacation' … but I suppose I can tell Penta some stuff. I mean, she can keep a secret and we're pretty tight anyway. Honestly, I care more about just competing than I do about winning; I'm having a great time, being on this show is like a free vacation. I'm starting to appreciate the 'great outdoors' a bit more … but only a little bit.

Yoko: It is a firm belief of Grandmaster Fong that every person is special in their own way and has a story to tell … after being on this island for more than two weeks it seems that he, as always, was right. That said, some stories are happier than others…


(Strong Squids)


The seven members of the Strong Squids were gathered around the campfire waiting for Courtney to tell them it was challenge time. As they sat around Harvey decided to break the silence.

"So … who do you guys think deserves to be voted off the team next?" Asked Harvey.

"Why do you ask?" Inquired Charles.

"I dunno, I just don't want to go into the next voting ceremony unprepared." Explained Harvey.

"We're not gonna say anything when everybody is here; it'd just be asking for trouble." Said Sampson flatly. "Besides, whether or not somebody 'deserves' to be voted out is irrelevant, it all comes down to votes; some may say I deserve to lose yet I'm still here. Plus, some could say Mist deserves to still be here but she's long gone."

"… I guess that makes sense." Conceded Harvey with a shrug. "Well, one thing is certain; we're gonna dominate the challenge now that we don't have Ub's black hole of evil sucking away at our pure hearts like some kind of greedy gluttonous vacuum cleaner!"

"That would be convenient." Agreed Tilly. "We have the stronger team, so we should do just fine."

"How is our team stronger?" Asked Charles.

"We don't have Donald's bad luck holding us back." Stated Tilly.

"It's mean, but Tilly makes a very good point." Agreed Ivy. "Let's hope the challenge plays to our strengths; if it involves ice and snow then I'll dominate it!"

"And I can win anything involving circus tricks." Added Harvey.

"And I can win this whole contest!" Exclaimed Otis.

"Yeah, you believe that if you want to." Shrugged Sampson.

At that moment Courtney approached the team.

"Ok guys, time for your next challenge." Announced Courtney. "Yesterday's loss was nothing more than a fluke; time to take back the crown of victory! Don't let me down guys."

"We'll make you proud Miss Courtney." Promised Charles. "What's the challenge today?"

"I can't tell you, but I can say that I do not think you will enjoy it." Said Courtney sympathetically. "And not just you, I doubt any of you will."

"Challenge accepted." Smirked Otis.

"Well, let's get this over with." Sighed Sampson.

The seven tweens got up and headed off to the challenge; as they left Edith noticed Courtney giving her a glare and sighed in remorse.


(Confessional: Sounds like a tough challenge…)

Charles: You know, Ricky may disagree with me … but Miss Courtney is a really smart lady. My heart belongs to Zanna, but I admire Courtney for being so smart, tough and never giving up. Maybe I could ask her for advice on how to be tougher … then again, I may end up messing that up. And do I have the time? I need to keep Zanna safe! If my team loses today I'll Zanna the Geoff Idol so that she can come and give me support at elimination.

Sampson: Courtney expects too much of us; being lazy is a full time job you know and isn't as easy as it looks.

Ivy: I've not been doing great recently since I was so depressed … but now that I'm more or less back to normal it's time to take on this challenge at full power!

Tilly: Me and Harvey are a good duo … but I think I'm a tad better at being subtle than he is. Then again, he's stronger than me so I guess it equals out. In any case, he's right. We need to plan who to eliminate next. It has to be Edith or Otis … or maybe even Sampson depending on how things go.


(Tough Tuna)


The eight members of the Tough Tuna were all seated around the campfire awaiting the challenge. Donald was sitting away from Penta while Yoko was comfortably sat on his lap. The rest of the team was sitting around and making the most of the free time they had until the challenge started.

"You know, if we had the proper supplies then we could play a game of Go Fish to pass the time." Mused Kelly.

"I think Zanna would win at that." Noted Yoko.

"Go Fish is a card game Yoko, not actual fishing." Explained Donald. "Sometimes people take the game too far?"

"What do you mean?" Asked Quadesh curiously.

"… Never again will I walk into my brother's room when he and his girlfriend are playing Go Fish." Said Donald with a shudder. "Anyway! Who do you think the other team voted out?"

"Definitely Ub, he sucked." Pouted Zanna.

"True, but he might have had an idol. If he did, Ivy might be gone. We'll only know for certain when we get to the challenge." Stated Quadesh. "And mark my words, today we're gonna crush the Strong Squids into the ground a second time!"

"Th't c'n be arranged." Said Xadrian confidently with a crack of his knuckles. "We beat em' yesterday an' we c'n beat em' again t'day."

"Don't get overconfident." Cautioned Penta.

"Penta's right, being overly smug is not a good idea." Agreed Kelly.

"Even if it ain't a g'd idea, people st'll do it anyway." Shrugged Xadrian. "Most people dun't got m'ch sense ya know."

"Don't I know it…" Agreed Larry. "Last season so many of the cast made so many bone headed moves … to this day I still wonder how Geoff thought there was an ice cream truck on a remote island."

"Hey, ice cream is delicious." Chuckled Geoff defensively as he walked up. "So, are you guys ready for your next challenge?"

"Why ask? We don't have a choice in the matter." Reminded Larry.

"True, but it never hurts to be enthusiastic, right?" Shrugged Geoff while not losing his grin.

"He has a point." Agreed Penta.

"Can you give us any hints about the challenge Geoff?" Asked Quadesh hopefully.

"Sorry, no can do … but I think all of you will not like what Chris has planned." Said Geoff with a wince at the thought.

"Aw crap." Muttered Xadrian.

"That sounds like the exact opposite of ookie." Gulped Yoko.

"Well, no sense delaying the inevitable." Sighed Quadesh. "Ok guys, let's head out … and let's not lose, got it?"

"We'll win, dun't you w'rry." Assured Xadrian.

"And hopefully we won't have to play dirty." Added Kelly. "If we do … that's life I guess."

"Life is unfair and sneers at us all; all we can do is sneer back at it." Shrugged Larry in resignation.


(Confessional: Life is unfair, so make sure to learn the cheat codes!)

Quadesh: If we lose, we kick off who I want … and if we win, then we're all safe. Sounds like a win-win situation to me. Ah, it feels great to have power.

Kelly: I think I know who to eliminate if we lose, but I'm honestly hoping that we win. I know I'm safe no matter what, but I still have to be careful. I love all my friends but the sad fact is I'll willingly stab them in the back if it means winning this game. And I'm not using the sympathy card; even if I did resort to that, they might not believe me. Plus, I don't like to milk others for their natural kindness; it's really a rotten thing to do.

Xadrian: Ah th'nk Quadesh an' Kelly are worried 'bout losing and being voted out … ah dun't blame th'm. F'rtunately, ah excel at fightin' dirty. Mah pappy taught me very well.

Larry: Something tells me I'm not gonna be enjoy the next few hours … I should have pretended to be ill.


(Challenge Field)


The fifteen campers were soon gathered at the challenge field. They immediately noticed a large pool had been set up and filled with a mixture of what could only be described as cooking fat, sewer sludge and excitement combined with all the happiness (or lack thereof) of being the BFF of a Dementor. Chris chuckled at the looks of horror on the faces of the tweens and began to speak.

"As you call see, Ub as been voted off. Today's challenge will test your endurance. You will be submerged up to your necks in the awful pool of grossness and will have to stay in there. You can leave at any time, but that means you are out. The last person still in the muck wins it for their team." Summed up Chris. "Any questions?"

"Yeah … are you mental? There is no way I am doing that!" Exclaimed Donald.

"Me neither." Added Harvey. "That's just horrible!"

"Count me out." Said Larry.

"Can I go back to camp? I'd rather not do this … ever." Stated Sampson.

"I have military training and even I won't do it!" Winced Penta.

Chris frowned and sighed.

"Your signed the contracts and so you're going to do it and like it." Ordered Chris.

"Make us you old tosser!" Frowned Quadesh.

Chris's response was drowned out by the sound of a helicopter. Everyone looked up and saw a large Chinook above them that slowly touched down onto the grass a few meters away.

"That's odd, we're not supposed to have visitors until the final twelve." Pondered Chris.

"Who cares? It's stalling the challenge." Shrugged Kelly.

The door of the chinook opened and a woman stepped out. She had long blond hair, blue eyes, a curvy figure, a red knee length dress and somewhat big boobs. Chris recognised this person immediately.

"Blaineley?!" Exclaimed Chris. "What are you doing here? Don't you have celebrities to harass and torture for you Celebrity Manhunt show?"

"Normally I would, but the new season isn't due to start for a few months." Stated Blaineley. "I'm here to settle a legal dispute."

"And what might that dispute be? If it's about that 'backseat taxi cab incident' I swear that the girl asked me to-." Began Chris before Blaineley cut him off.

"Not that. I'm talking about how you totally ripped off my show." Stated Blaineley while gazing over the tweens. "Every tween here totally rips off somebody on my show. Are you so unoriginal that you had to get cut rate clones?"

"Who are you calling cut rate? I'm full price!" Exclaimed Otis.

"Yeah, we're our own people!" Added Ivy.

"I'm currently hosting my own reality show; Ultra Melodrama Island, and you've ripped off all my material. I have the power to cancel your show and I will be exercising that legal right here and now." Said Blaineley in a very smug tone.

"You can't cancel my show! My show is the best thing on TV!" Yelled Chris.

"Yeah, it's got family appeal and some kind of educational value if you use your imagination." Added Yoko sweetly. "Who are you anyway?"

A nerve appeared on Blaineley's forehead.

"Who am I? WHO AM I? I'm the ruler of the universe and all of Hollywood! I am Blaineley!" Yelled Blaineley.

"… Who?" Blinked Yoko.

"Please forgive Yoko; she comes from a very remote region of China and doesn't get cable." Said Donald quickly. "And furthermore, no way in hell are you cancelling us!"

"Too bad too sad, I have legal power. Lawyers work extra hard when you have stuff against them." Chuckled Blaineley.

"How do I know this isn't just a prank? Where is your cast … if they even exist?" Asked Chris.

"I'm glad you asked; they're on the Chinook. Want to meet them?" Asked Blaineley.

"Well, I have nothing else to do until my third mid-morning nap." Shrugged Sampson.

"Ok then, prepare too be razzled and dazzled!" Exclaimed Blaineley.

Suddenly the light around everyone dimmed as stage lights shone down at the door of the Chinook.

"What happened to the lights?" Asked Edith in confusion.

"Who cares?" Asked Otis.

"But … it makes no sense!" Insisted Edith.

"Again, who cares? What fun is there in making sense?" Asked Otis.

"He has a point." Added Harvey.

A music tune began to play; it was catchy and sounded like something one would hear on a catwalk show. Blaineley had taken a microphone out of her pocket and posed for the camera.

"Prepare to be amazed by the Blainerriffic cast of Ultra Melodrama Island!" Announced Blaineley.

"Oh joy, more annoyances." Groaned Larry.


(Confessional: Well … at least the original challenge seems to have been forgotten, right?)

Charles: We're getting cancelled? Not good! Not good! This is definitely the time to start panicking! Aaaaaaaargh!

Tilly: Mierda! This is like something from a very poorly written story that throws in plot twists all the time just because it can!

Edith: Blaineley's smugness really makes me mad … hmm, I'm judging her wit5hout personally knowing her … that's another flaw to add to the list. Gee, I really am bad.

Quadesh: If that women wants to cancel the show and make everyone unhappy then she's got another thing coming … my fist!

Kelly: Cancelled? No! I need that money! I'll fight tooth and nail to beat that horrid woman!

Yoko: … That mean lady takes herself too seriously; I think she needs to go to her happy place.


"He's a nerd, but he also does none nerdy things like actually having friends, give it up for Charlie!" Announced Blaineley as a boy stepped off the Chinook.

Charlie had dark crimson hair and very thick glasses, as well as an overbite. He wore a blue shirt, a lab coat and red pants.

"Most nerds are sad about not being popular … I just see it as me breaking the system and being self-sufficient." Stated Charlie. "I'm playing a good game so far."

"Oh great, a rival." Gulped Charles.

"He is a disaster magnet extraordinaire but is a total sir and full of class, here's Douglas!" Announced Blaineley as another boy stepped off the Chinook.

Douglas had very bright yellow hair and wore a fancy scarlet jacket with a golden undershirt and purple pants. He looked somewhat snooty.

"This island pales in comparison to our beloved Boohoonakwa. But maybe my luck will improve out here." Mused Douglas.

At that moment a bird swooped overhead and a plop of bird crap fell on Douglas' shoulder.

"… Darn it." Sighed Douglas.

"It's kinda creepy to see somebody who is so similar to me…" Shuddered Donald.

"She's albino and as sweet as sugar, here comes Enid!" Announced Blaineley.

A shaggy haired Albino girl wearing all black stepped off the Chinook and smiled brightly at everyone.

"Hi guys! It's super to meet you! Would any of you like to play hopscotch with me?" Asked Enid sweetly.

Edith looked weirded out at all that was going on.

"Err…" Trailed off Edith.

"Next up, he's so clumsy that he once destroyed his town's Wal-Mart with one trip, here's Herbie!" Announced Blaineley.

A stocky African Canadian boy in a stripy purple and orange shirt and yellow pants stepped off the Chinook … and promptly tripped over and hit the ground so hard that the trees shook.

"I'm uninjured!" Assured Herbie.

Harvey raised an eyebrow and frowned.

"He's copying me." Frowned Harvey.

"She claims to be from Antarctica, but she's actually from Canada, here's Icy!" Announced Blaineley dramatically.

An African Canadian girl stepped off the chinook; her hair was dark blue and she wore a dark blue shirt and skirt, both with a snowflake pattern on them.

"Greetings everyone! Ready to chill?" Grinned Icy. "Boy or girl, I'll kiss your booboo's better!"

"Her name is cool but I'm started to get scared." Gulped Ivy.

"She comes from down south in America and is the youngest camper on my show, give a cheer for Kolly!" Exclaimed Blaineley.

A short brunette girl stepped off the chinook; her hair was done up into one large ponytail and she wore a patched pair of yellow jeans and a green and yellow jacket with a blue undershirt, both of which had patches sewn on them.

"Hi guys, how's it going? Ready to lose? Wait, I didn't mean that! I don't want my sisters getting mad at me." Murmured Kolly.

"… What the hell…" Blinked Kelly.

"Presenting Lenny, a troll on the PlayStation Network and a huge cynic to boot." Announced Blaineley as a boy stepped off the chinook.

The boy had his hair dyed orange with a red Mohawk and wore a blue shirt and a black jacket. His face was covered by a surgeons mask with fake bloodstains on it. His pants were dark green.

"Hey idiots, I just want you to know that I will not tolerate people who bug me. Try to act normal." Said Lenny before groaning. "Why did I sign up for this show? The people are crazy."

"… He seems alright." Shrugged Larry.

"Presenting the craziest guy in the world and also the guy who causes more damage than a tactical nuclear missile strike, Odin!" Announced Blaineley.

A boy leapt off the Chinook and let out a cackle; he was dressed the same as Otis, except rather than having red streaks in his hair he had blue streaks. He also has a more crazy looking expression with very wide eyes and wore a fez hat.

"Guess what Blaineley? I cut the wires to the battery of the Helicopter! Wildcard bitches!" Whooped Odin as he started to do some kind of tribal dance whilst bouncing like a rubber ball.

"I think I have a new best friend, sorry Donald." Said Otis simply.

"Hey!" Frowned Donald.

"I was just joking." Assured Otis. "By the way, can we meet in the neutral zone after the challenge? I want to catch up for old times' sake!"

"Sure." Nodded Donald.

"The tough girl of the gang who knows how to handle a rifle, Patty!" Exclaimed Blaineley.

A Vietnamese girl stepped off the chinook with a look of seriousness about her. Her hair was almost the same as Penta's, but she had a fringe over one eye. Her outfit, like Penta's, consisted of a shirt, skirt and stockings, but unlike Penta who had mostly yellow with some pink, Patty had a total reverse of Penta's outfit that was pink with some yellow.

"Hi everyone." Greeted Patty. "I like sports and getting rugged in the wild, but tea parties are cool too, am I right?"

"Where is Blaineley getting all these clones…" Whispered Penta in unease.

"She has ambitions of being a political leader and has a crush on Odin that she always denies, it's Qualanta!" Announced Blaineley as a girl confidently stepped off the chinook.

This girl was a brunette with her hair in pigtails and a surly look on her face; her shirt was silver and her pants were bronze.

"Is this it? This island is less than I expected which was little to begin with." Noted Qualanta. "But I suppose like any politician I have to visit crappy places and put on a pleasant façade."

"This is kinda disturbing." Shuddered Quadesh.

"Hey, since that girl has a crush on Odin … does that mean you have a crush on Otis?" Asked Tilly with a smirk.

Quadesh blushed and didn't make eye contact with anyone.

"He's lazy and never puts effort into anything, here's Samuel!" Announced Blaineley.

Nobody got off the chinook.

"Samuel, get out here!" Yelled Blaineley.

"I don't want to, it's too much effort." Replied a dull voice.

"Do it or you're eliminated." Ordered Blaineley.

"Urgh, fine." Muttered a boy as he stepped off the chinook.

The boy was somewhat overweight and had an uncaring expression, as though showing emotion was too much effort. His short was red and had a frowny face on it, his undershirt was yellow and his pants were indigo. He was a blond, though had darker hair than Sampson did.

"If you need me I'll be sleeping and doing nothing, so don't need me." Droned Samuel.

"I might have met my match for the title of Laziness King." Chuckled Sampson.

"She's twistier than a python and spicier than spices, give a cheer for Tammy!" Exclaimed Blaineley.

A Spanish girl stepped off the chinook and showed off her twistiness by twisting her torso all the way around. She wore an orange shirt with green swirls and yellow pants. Her hair was done is six pigtails with the tips of them dyed red.

"Hola amigos! Ready to get bent out of shape?" Giggled Tammy.

"… You guys are right, this is creepy. That and I'm offended somebody is ripping me off." Scowled Tilly.

"Such nerve." Agreed Harvey.

"He's dirt poor and loves to kill animals since he has nothing else to do with his life, here's Xandy!" Announced Blaineley.

A boy with dirty cloths and several scars stepped off the chinook; his shirt was ragged and grey and his jeans were light blue and very worn. His hair was ginger and spiky and he had a very rough, tough and tasteless look about him.

"H'y g'ys, ah'm r'dy ta k'll s'n an'm'ls." Grinned Xandy.

"… Ok, even I can't understand him." Blinked Xadrian. "Either way, he's going down if he thinks he can one-up me."

"She's from a remote region of china and has all the nativity of a sheltered homeschooler, it's Yuku!" Exclaimed Blaineley grandly.

A Chinese girl stepped off the chinook and gazed around with wide curious eyes. She wore a blue and bronze kimono and her black hair was done up in two cutesy pigtails.

"Whoa, this island is so cool! I never knew there was another island so similar yet different than ours. How many island are in this big wide world?" Asked Yuko in wonder.

"She reminds me of me." Noted Yoko.

"And finally, she loves fishing, phones and nerds, give it up for Zonna!" Announced Blaineley as a final girl stepped off the chinook.

This girl had long blond hair with some curls in it; she wore a purple shirt with a green zig zag pattern on it and yellow shorts. She was currently playing a game on her phone.

"Yes! Level complete! That means I'm done with Sugar Shire!" Cheered Zonna.

"I haven't even gotten that far yet … now I feel upstaged." Frowned Zanna.


(Confessional: I smell plagiarism!)

Xadrian: Mah pappy always says th't plagiarism is a mighty b'g problem in our fair l'nd of C'nada. He also says the plagiarists should be treated like the plague and that the descent folk sh'd be tha medicine ta g't rid of th'm. L't it be said th't ah enjoy a chall'nge.

Quadesh: As if it wasn't bad enough some punk is ripping me off, now I have to worry about being teased for having a crush on that handsome loon! Urgh, what a day…

Sampson: Finally somebody of class dignity and laziness matching mine. I like where this is going.

Yoko: It's always nice to meet likeminded people … do you think Douglas and Yuku are dating like me and Donald?

Larry: This is exactly what I don't need. And here I was enjoying my day; I should not have let me guard down. Urgh, fate has a cruel sense of humour…

Kelly: I don't normally wish bad things on anybody, but if those guys want to get us cancelled then I'll fight them to my final breathe, and beyond!


After Blaineley's cast was assembled there was a moment of silence before Chris spoke.

"You're totally ripping off everybody on my show!" Yelled Chris. "Find your own contestants to torture, don't resort to clones!"

"Some would say that your cast are the true clones." Shrugged Blaineley. "Point is, you're gonna be cancelled since my cast is superior."

"The viewers would disagree; Total Drama has a big fan base full of loyal individuals with pseudo names based on aliens, animals and food!" Yelled Chris. "You can't cancel me without facing their wrath!"

"Well, you're still gonna be cancelled." Said Blaineley smugly.

"We need to settle this somehow, permanently." Frowned Chris.

"I agree, let's duel." Declared Blaineley. "Fights are great for ratings."

"Maybe so, but the network would not allow it." Replied Chris.

"Then … how about a contest? Your players against mine. They can show who is superior and who the rip-off is." Suggested Blaineley. "Winner stays on the air, loser gets cancelled."

"Don't do it Chris!" Exclaimed Yoko.

"I accept!" Declared Chris dramatically.

"Dammit." Muttered Larry.

"So, is this gonna be a challenge for immunity, or will there be no elimination today?" Asked Charles hopefully.

"You know what? This will be a challenge." Nodded Chris. "The rules will be simple; you will each face off against your counterpart in a one on one challenge to score points for your respective teams. Tweenabet campers, if you win your challenge then you score a point for Total Drama Tweenabet and your team. However, if we lose to the copycats then we might end up cancelling … that or I have to play a fine. Either way, losing is not an option!"

"Even though we risk being cancelled … this is still better than the original challenge that Chris had planned." Shrugged Quadesh. "Though I guess we'll miss out on one of the landmarks of Wawanakwa."

"I know; the termite mounds would have been hilarious to see." Agreed Chris, "So much for the third landmark."

"So, what order are we going in?" Asked Charles. "Alphabetical? I really don't want to go first!"

"Relax, I'll just use the letter generating app on my cellphone to decide." Assured Chris. "And now let's find who out goes first … right after the break."

"The last commercial break you'll ever cut to." Smirked Blaineley.

"Shut up." Muttered Chris.


(Confessional: Is this the end of Total Drama?)

Quadesh: So, a one on one against my 'clone'? Fine by me! I'm gonna show I'm the real politician around here!

Tilly: My team and Tough Tuna better carry their weight; I'm not having all my hard work undone due to a feud between two washed up celebrities!

Donald: … Just my luck…

Otis: Normally I'd be worried, but … oh who am I kidding? I never worry about anything; this'll be fun! And you know what they say, the copy is never as good as the original … unless the original was utter crud quality and the copy was actually made with effort. I know a guy who copies DVD's with that ideology in mind.


Next Time: The campers face off against their eerily identical matches. Somebody is also voted off … or at least that's Chris's plan if the show isn't cancelled!