I lie in bed, staring at the wall. This unofficial medical wing was vaguely my home for the last few days. It was nice for a bit to relax in only my pants, but it soon grew tiresome. Several of my soldiers came to visit, but our talks were short and awkward. Here I was again, being useless, unable to do anything but sulk. A stack of papers sit next to me. It's all information on the Og Nag and Zaran. Nothing to report. I start wondering if this was another ploy by Zaran to mess with my head.

I began to resent seeing my soldiers. Watching them walk about in their armor, always having a task to perform, always on duty, constantly deserving praise and recognition. I can't even live up to my own legend anymore. I'm afraid you will have to be content with your physical form. Starswirl's words are a poison. I drown in them. There is no one to pull me out. No one to stop the unbearable burning on my skin that cries for purpose.

I wince at the thought of being the old general in the room, who constantly spews out his tales of valor, desperate to not be forgotten. No one listens. They've all heard it before. Eyes hit the floor as they walk by, hoping not to attract my attention. They listen out of respect, but my words are lost by the desire to pursue more interesting and current things.

Was I really Celestia's lap dog? Someone she could push easier responsibilities to, knowing I'd never disobey my master? Perhaps they'll give me my own basic quarters too for a little dog house. Maybe a nice window so ponies can trot by and stare at me. I'm sure I'd make a fascinating attraction. Raiden, the dog who thinks he's a general.

The light clicking of hooves grabs my attention. I try to downplay Luna's visit on my face. As much as I adored her company, I didn't want her to see me like this. If I got lucky, I'd be killed off by Zaran, and all Luna would remember of me is a warrior who never backed down. Anything would be better than being a pest she was honorbound to tolerate. Hell I'd gladly get a rolled up newspaper for her if it made it easier.

Her pace quickens as she borderline runs to my bedside. She almost rams her face into mine excitedly. Her smile is as wide as she can manage.

"Hi!" she squeals with so much enthusiasm it almost throws me off. I swallow once, unable to control my misery.
"Hi princess." My words are as quiet and hollow as I am. Her ears fall back with concern. She stares deep into my face, but I can't resist turning my head away to my left. She quickly trots around the bed, and bumps my nose with hers, quickly flashing on that massive smile of hers. I look back to the right. I have to force my smile away, as the same clicking of hooves travels around the bed, before I'm met with those teal eyes again.

I sigh before turning to the left again. Luna gently climbs on my bed, with each leg surrounding me. We play this little "nose game" a few more times before I shut my eyes and groan.
"Luna...I'm sorry but I'm not in the mood." I try to say it as gently as possible. I'm not mad at her but I just can't be happy at the moment. She nuzzles my nose once, before carefully laying herself on top of me, and resting her head on my shoulder. Her warm body pressing against me, is almost soothing as if she was actually pulling the negativity out of me. My arms wrap around her, longing to feel some form of affection.

She wiggles a bit, trying to cuddle up a bit more. She calmly grinds her cheek into mine.
"What's wrong?" she whispers into my ear. I do really need to tell her? As I sigh with frustration, she nuzzles my face. My left hand reaches up and massages her ear, slowly moving to the back of her neck. She rests her head against me again, enjoying the moment.
"Please tell me…" the sympathy in her voice is almost heartbreaking.

"I just...I'm useless to you all now. How the hell am I going to help fight Zaran when I can't use magic or even participate without getting in the way? I'm just some human now. You and the others will find a way to stop him, and I'll gradually become a burden for you." my last few words crackle, as I choke back tears. They hurt, but they're true. She wrenches her head back in shock. Those teal eyes scan my face, probably wondering why I would say such a thing.

"Raiden...you can't be serious!" She's almost angry now. Wonderful, I've turned my only means of comfort into an argument. Her stare morphs into determination as she climbs back to the floor. Maybe she'll go find Emeris now, and they'll be happy together. I'd be fine with rotting in this bed while they get married.

I call out in surprise when Luna starts gently pounding my hip with her hooves.
"Okay lazybutt, no more of this! Out of bed!" She starts hitting me a tad harder. Not wanting to actually harm me, but she means business. I groan as I roll over, and cautiously lower my legs to the floor. My muscles hadn't fully recovered yet, but standing felt good.

I don't move away from the bed. Why bother, where would I even go? Do another pointless inspection and keep myself busy? I wonder how many "sudden errands" the princesses could scrounge up for me. I'm like a child who needs a band-aid, and they'd be the mothers who didn't want to deal with my cries.

Luna stomps over to me and starts pulling on the waistband of my pants. She tugs me past the bed, into the middle of the room.

"Luna I'm sorry but...I honestly just need to be on my own for a bit." She narrows her eyes at me.

"You can walk or I can carry you. Your choice."
I inhale angrily.

"Luna…" I try to add some strictness to my tone. She's not having it. Her eyes close, and she sticks her snout in the air. I'm lifted by her magic and we begin making our way across the room. I can't take it anymore. I'm not some pet to be taken on a whim.

"Luna, put me down right now!" My sudden shrieks of anger break her concentration, and I'm dropped to the floor. She whirls around and faces me, with a look of fright. I get to my feet and stop holding back for once.

"Stop forcing things on me! All of you!" The air hangs with what I can only describe as a deathly silence. I hear my words carry everything between us out the window. I'm officially a loose cannon now. She blinks a few times before looking at the ground. I'm able to bite my tongue, hoping she has something to say. Her response is a few tears I've caused. She paws at the ground.

"I...I'm sorry. I just wanted to help..." Her high-pitched words cut down whatever beast had seized me. A small sniffle drives it home.

"Luna…" I whisper just loud enough for her to hear me. She doesn't look up. Her trembling mouth is all she can do to keep the faucet off. The awkwardness in the room is almost unbearable. I'm torn between my rage and wanting to comfort her. She sits as a pitiful heap. I walk over and stop just a few inches away. Her hot, sporadic exhales travel around my abs. I reach out with my right hand, and calmly place it under her jaw. I stroke her cheek with my thumb reassuringly.

Without moving her head, she calmly gets on her hind legs, embracing me in a hug. My left hand clasp onto her mane, while my right strokes her back under her wings. Minutes pass like a beautiful dream. We say nothing, as words are useless. We enjoy eachothers company. She's content with gentle massages, I'm perfectly alright with her brushing up against my face.

She settles down, and my heart flutters a bit as her breathing returns to normal. She sniffles a bit before pulling her head back.
"I get it though. I'm sorry I...forgot what you've been through. I won't lift you again without asking."
I stroke her cheek a few times.
"It's fine. It's just been a rough week I guess." I whisper with embarrassment. Luna gives me a weak smile.
"A bit of an understatement but I understand." She wipes away her last few tears with a hoof before a grin crosses her face.
"I have a wager for you then." she says mischievously. I cock an eyebrow in response.
"I'll give you a kiss…" she takes a few gradual steps towards me. As soon as I begin to lean down towards her, she puts a single hoof on my mouth.
"But, you have to find someone in the palace or even Ponyville that agrees with how worthless you think you are." She closes her eyes, sticks her nose in the air with pride, and trots off. She makes sure to gently whip my face with her tail as she whirls around.
I roll my eyes knowing full well her plan is going to backfire. That being said, I wanted an excuse to get out anyways.

This little medical wing was at the very back of the palace. I push through the door leading into a long walkway. One thing I had always thought odd of Canterlot Palace was how open it was. Apart from the throne room that connects into the dining hall, the palace was made up of multiple towers, borderline isolated except for one or two walkways that connect them. These paths were a single surface with rails, otherwise completely open to the sky. Perhaps I was too used to the security of Taraska Castle, which prided itself in security and nothing else.

My eyes can't help but scan my environment nervously, as I rapidly cross the open pathway to the next tower. My sore legs make each step rather arduous, but the fresh air is worth it. I felt vulnerable with nothing but my black slacks. I atleast had socks and shoes that were left for me. I stop and face the railing, letting the cool breeze of the afternoon massage my bare chest.

The walkway lets me see off to the southwest. Ponyville was much more fortified than I remembered. Many houses had been rebuilt, then reinforced with metal plates. From what Emeris told me, they had turned their houses into mini hotels. They weren't pretty, but they were defendable. It would take a Garge to bring down any house. Each window had a metal grating over it, and they were too wide to simply topple over. Even from the palace, I could tell that each house could hold off Og Nag for a while if the outer walls failed.

I begin walking again, eager to see the new improvements. The first tower ahead of me, has roughly three families in it. I look through the small, glass window built into the door. They all sit around a table in the middle of the room. Each tower had a door on the opposite side of it's first floor, with a stairway against the wall that leads up to the second floor. The towers aren't terribly wide, but they can often be up to ten stories. Granted they were designed for a significantly smaller species

With four mares playing cards on the table, everyone else is either counting various possessions or reading a book. While they were clearly more middle class, they looked surprisingly worry-free. They're clean, a bit cramped most likely, but otherwise they seemed to be in good health. There had to be at least twelve ponies on the first floor alone.

They all stop and stare as I enter through the door. I give them a nod and a small wave. I know I'm not in danger, but the only times I was out of my armor was being a punching bag in one way or another. Casually crossing my arms around my midsection, I having no idea what to say. They give me weak smiles before turning back to their card game. I do my best to scoot by, without bumping into anyone's belongings or chair.

A colt with black fur and a blue mane trots quietly behind me.
"Are you a soldier?!" he asks excitedly. A warm smile crosses my face.
"Yes young sir, I certainly am." I hear him gasp quietly.
"Does that mean you'll protect us if the creatures get here?!" His tone makes me think he assumes I'm some kind of superhero.
"Protect you?" I take a knee in front of him. The fact he doesn't back up a single step is adorable.
"I'll do more than protect you, it's actually my job to make sure none of them get anywhere close to you." The mares playing cards can't help but coo happily. I get up and continue with my cautious steps towards the next door.
"So so, you're like an archer then?! Or are you one of those guys with the shields?!" He talks so fast I can barely make out what he says. I stop and face him just before touching the door.
"Actually I'm neither. Princess Celestia gave me the job of being in charge of your entire army. I must say it's weird not having my armor on." My ears can't help but notice the room has gone completely silent. I take a look around at the odd sight of every pony watching me with massive eyes and gaping mouths.

One of the mares at the table with red fur and a blonde mane, looks at her friends before addressing me.
"Are...are you the one they call General Raiden? The human with the red cape?" Her words sound almost fearful. I can't tell if it's awe or resentment. If I'm the reason her husband or whoever died, I'd be powerless if she attacked me. There's a long metal candleholder to my right. It would make a decent weapon if I used the doorframe as a choke point.
"Yes, that's me." I say as neutral as possible. They all hop out of their chairs, with shocked faces. My brain screams at me to grab the candle holder and fall back while I still have the chance. My gut tells me I'm just being stupid. I have no idea who to listen to. Another mare with silver fur and black hair calls up the stairs.
"Lightning, Jolt and Thunder, get down here right now!" She calls out eagerly. Great, one of my soldiers probably screwed something up and now they want to take it out on me. What the hell am I going to do if they're unicorns? Three stallions come trotting down the steps. They look familiar somehow. Their eyes go to me, then the mare that I assume is their mother from her commanding tone. They stand at the bottom of the steps, wondering why everyone is staring at me. The mother bolts over to them, smiles and points a hoof at me.
"This is General Raiden, the one you saw at Ponyville a few months ago!" The colts stare at me with the same expression they all have. Just perfect, all three are unicorns. If I was quick, I could hurl the plates on the table and blind them as I made a run for it. The first colt is gray, with a combination of blue and black hair. He takes a few steps towards me. It's now or never; if I'm going to strike, it has to be first. The colt's mouth trembles.
"I...I...we never got to thank you! We were there the day Ponyville first got raided! Oh it was so scary, I don't know how you all just...run into combat like that! We tried to make a dash for it! Oh um, I'm Thunder, these are my brothers Jolt and Lightning!" Jolt takes a few steps forwards. While his brother Thunder had a very charismatic voice similar to Shining Armor's, Jolt's sounds rougher, almost as if he has a sore throat. His fur is a dark grey, with a mane that's a short dirty blonde.
"If I remember correctly, I don't think we knew you were the goodcolts at first. With that armor of yours, we didn't know what to think!" Lightning steps forward eagerly. His fur is brown, and his mane is long and silver. His voice shakes with enthusiasm.
"We're so sorry about attacking you! We didn't know what was going on, we were told to evacuate to Canterlot, everything was chaos, ponies were screaming, it was a nightmare!" I stare at them confused, trying to remember who they were. When Ponyville first got raided…

The side of a nearby house explodes, as three unicorns send five of my soldiers sailing. I groan, while holding up my hands to my other approaching soldiers.
"Clear a path, let them through. If they don't want to be here, let them leave, they don't need as escort." One of them looks straight at me, and I have to roll to the side narrowly missing a bolt of fire. My men start charging them instinctively. They can't hear my orders to fall back over the chaos.

Two of the unicorns are tackled to the ground, as a third starts sending waves of magic at anyone approaching. They do their best to wrestle the unicorns to the ground, but with the ability to levitate any type of chain or rope, they become a massive waste of effort. With neither of the trio looking at me, I run over and with a quick fist, knock all three of them out. They all lose consciousness and I can do nothing but hope they survive. Two of my soldiers carry them back towards Luna.

I can't do anything besides stare at them. That was such a long time ago. Was it actually a few months? It felt like several days but a few years at the same time. The three colts talk to eachother, going over every fun detail about how scared they were, describing sword fights they saw. They act like it was some movie, as if their lives, our lives, weren't even in danger. A few minutes of answering questions that they gawk at, and I'm off again. Giving them a hearty wave, I make my way to the next tower.

I thought it was rather odd that they were the first ponies I would run into. Perhaps Luna had me intentionally moved to that room, knowing I'd bump into them on my way out. It also made sense that we started moving the first refugees we got, into the back of the palace to make it easier for more refugees to get through later, since the entrances wouldn't already be crowded. The next door is locked. I knock and wait a few minutes.

I can't help but smile. It was so nice to have fans. I had completely forgotten about those three. Storming into Ponyville...it was so long ago. The door opens, revealing a mare with purple fur and a light pink mane. I recognize her immediately but I never got her name. We stare at eachother quietly. Her jaw trembles before she jumps forward, giving me a hug. My arms instinctively wrap themselves around her.

She lets go and takes a few steps back. Her mouth hangs open in pleasant excitement before she quickly backs up and invites me in. This couldn't be a coincidence. Although if Luna had organized this, she probably had good reason.
"Ace! General Raiden is here!" she calls out. A storm of hooves echoes down the stairs, as Ace and his small purple filly bolt to greet me. Ace skids to a stop with his daughter. He stomps his hooves a few times eagerly, with a massive grin.
"I can't believe it! It's actually you! In our home! How have you been?! Can we get you anything?!"
I shake my head, unable to speak from all the commotion. The mare's eye bulge with her smile as she looks from her husband back to me.
"I...I wanted to thank you for saving us! To be honest, the military life didn't suit me, for the brief period I was a scout in it. All the killing and fighting...I don't know how you Taraskans do it." Ace looks at his wife, nodding so hard I thought he might sprain his neck. His eyes suddenly reflect some type of guilt.
"Yeah I would have enlisted too but, I mean one of us had to watch our daughter...and I mean also I've never fought before and-" I put a gentle hand on his shoulder for a second.
"It's alright. Honestly, there's not much you could have done besides scouting. We're still working out ways ponies can join in. Besides, family is important." He looks down with embarrassment and nods. I chuckle a bit.
"I'm sure you would have made a fine warrior Ace." I get it, he wanted to be big and brave. He feels emasculated for not fighting. I had always thought it was weird how most men thought they were cowards for not fighting. Why would you willingly pursue such a violent career? Do they never stop to consider what you have to live with? All the memories, friends dying, the agony. It was as if all they could think about was victory. I envied any pony here who didn't have to close their eyes and see what I saw.
I stay for a few more minutes, listening to their tales of what they saw on their way back to Canterlot. Apparently my soldiers had left quite the impression. They chatter eagerly, trading off between venting their fear and expressing their gratitude. I was actually sad to leave them, but I had work to do. Ace follows me through the next tower for a bit, talking about how he would have loved to give it back to the Og Nag and whatnot. He talks with a lot of fire, but his eyes reflect regret and a bit of fear. He tells me goodbye and runs back to his tower. His wife had mad a great scout when we first arrived, but she quickly stayed in doors with her family.

Instead of going straight through the palace, I continue around a walkway that encircles the main building but stays outside. I start down the mountain towards Base Ponyville, enjoying numerous civilians waving at me and calling out my name. Several foals chase each other with wooden sticks. A few of them even have colored capes on, but none were red. The refugees had probably seen enough of that color as it was though.

I knew deep down that these ponies would recover, but could I?