Chapter 29
Adrianna POV
I was lying on my bed staring at my textbooks, I had a maths test tomorrow and I couldn't focus. I needed to study, my grades had been slipping slightly and dad already spoken to me about them and he understood why I was so unfocused but I was trying either way. Just as I was about focus on the next equation there was a knock at my door, Emily just walks in and Sarah and Amelia text before they come down to my end of the hall. I grudgingly got off my bed and walked over to open the door. When I opened it I couldn't help the smile on my face.
"Jer what are you doing here?" I reached up and put my arms around his neck to hug him as he walked both of us into my room and shut the door behind him.
"Well I missed my girlfriend, I haven't seen much of her and I don't know what to do. I was hoping I could get some advice" that's the other thing that was slipping, my relationship with Jeremy. He understood why I hated leaving my room but I hated knowing I making him feel unwanted.
"I'm so sorry Jer, you know why..." he cut off my sentence by kissing me
"Dri don't try and explain I understand, I hate it but I understand. I notice during meals when you instantly tense up and I don't have to look around to know it's because Michael entered the room. But me missing you isn't why I'm here since I saw you in class earlier, I'm here because I'm disappointed you didn't come to me after your confrontation with him yesterday. Why did Emily have to tell me and not you?" I pulled away from him, went and sat on my bed hugging my pillow.
I was in such a good mood yesterday morning, I had finally gotten to surprise Nikolaus and pin him. He seemed distracted but I took it anyway. Even in my novice classes I seemed to be doing better, they were the only classes I was really focusing on. I was still determined to prove that I deserved to graduate with my friends. And during both breakfast and lunch Michael hadn't appeared. I had to go to the bathroom after fifth period and when I entered my sixth period Physiology class worried I was about to get given a detention for being late I noticed the room was empty. I tried to rack my brain for information from yesterday's class about it being move but I couldn't remember anything.
I began looking through my bag for my phone when I remember that I left it to charge in my room, I had no way to message Emily or Stefan and ask where our class got moved too.
"They aren't here, they're taking the class in one of the library's side rooms" I turned around the sound of the voice, I found Michael standing there leaning against the doorway blocking my only way out.
"Why aren't you teaching?"
"I only teach in the mornings, you know this Adrianna"
"Then move aside so I can get to class. I need Physiology where as I don't need to have this conversation"
"I'm a teacher, you can't talk to me like that"
"You're not my teacher and plus I don't care what you think" I looked around the room trying to judge if I could jump out one of the windows. I was trying to decide if destruction of school property was worth me spending more time alone in here with him
"You should care what I think, remember what I said the other week. You're just a dhampir that has rumours running around that she is in the making to be a blood whore where as I'm a royal Moroi. I knew you were going to be a blood whore one day when you were living with me and I still believe that now. You even have a Moroi boyfriend, I wouldn't be surprised if you let him feed off you as well" as well...what did he mean by as well. I hadn't let Jeremy feed off me and I never would, I might not have been raised in this world but I still understood why things like that were taboo.
"What do you mean as well?" he laughed as he took a step closer to me.
"You seriously thought all those bruises where from the punches?" he couldn't be referring to feeding off me. He couldn't, it wasn't right. "Yes I did feed off you and to tell you the truth, dhampir blood is so much better than human blood"
"DRI! There you are" I heard Emily's voice but couldn't see her, I was grateful she had found me and I hoped she had heard the conversation.
"That's why you sent Jason to look for me?"
"It is" I was shocked, but at least I knew why Jason was so set on finding me.
"Come on Dri, class got moved to the library. When you didn't show up I asked Miss Lancaster if I could come see if you were here" Emily grabbed my arm started pulling me from the room, Michael let us go knowing he was no match for two novices.
"Please tell me you heard what he was saying and I don't have to convince them of anything"
"No I heard everything, him admitting to the bruises and that he fed off you. Come on we're going to look for your dad"
Dad didn't take the information well but he said he will pass it on to the people who needed to know and sent us back to class.
"Babe...?" I looked over at him, he was sitting on the edge of my bed staring at me. I shook my head at him and he moved closer to me on the bed and he pulled me closer to him.
"I just feel so used and dirty, ever since he came back the memories have as well. After I was out of that house I pushed the memories aside so I didn't have to think about them. Looking back on the memories some of them are fuzzy and I just thought it was because I couldn't remember it that well but now I think that maybe it was just the high. I listen in Moroi culture Jer, they explain the effects of a bite" I pulled away from him and he looked hurt. I wanted to apologize but he moved down the bed and smiled at me.
"Is that better?"
"What makes you think that will make me feel better?"
"Because you told me about your issues of being around Moroi when you first started here, I figured finding out that the guy who raped and beat you also fed off you would bring back all those concerns. I get it but I hate it, I want to be able to consol my terrified girlfriend but instead I will act like the nice boyfriend who is waiting for his frigid girlfriend to be comfortable for him to touch her" he grinned at me and I shook my head at him.
"You're an asshole sometimes, you shouldn't compare this to that it's completely different"
"But I'm a lovable asshole" if we were still friends this would be the point where I would reach over and hug him saying I loved him either way but we weren't just friends. We were dating and me agreeing to that would change everything. "Sorry old habits, it's fine I get why you're quiet" he must have realised what he said.
"I just need some time to process what Michael said, it changes everything"
"Do you trust me?"
"I do but what does that have to do with Michael"
"Then trust me" he moved back towards where I was sitting on my bed and he leaned over to kiss me.
I didn't want to panic but I was slightly but I reminded myself that I trusted him and he cared about me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he took this as a sign that I was alright and he moved me off the wall and laid me back down on the bed.
I had missed this with Jeremy and I didn't realise until now, until he pulled away from the kiss. I frowned at him and he smiled at me. He kissed my cheek, my jaw and my neck and that was when I completely panicked. I pulled my arms away from his neck and placed them on his chest and as if he knew I was going to push him away he pulled away.
"Adrianna, trust me, please" I shook my head at him and he frowned. "Please babe, I'm not going to do anything you aren't comfortable with"
"Alright..." I looked at him and I could tell he meant what he said. I moved my hand so I could grip his and I closed my eyes while he placed his lips back on my neck.
I could feel my heart rate increasing and I tried hard to lower it but I couldn't, I wasn't comfortable with this and he knew it but he wanted me to trust him. He stopped kissing my neck at some point and laid down beside me wrapping an arm around my waist. He didn't say anything and neither did I, I just laid there waiting for my heart rate to slow down.
When it eventually returned to normal I turned and face Jeremy, he was worried but I didn't know what he expected me to do.
"I'm sorry Dri"
"Why did you do that? You could obviously tell I wasn't comfortable with it"
"I could but you didn't try and stop me again, I wanted you to realise that not all Moroi are after just blood, I can happily kiss you like and even feel your racing heart beat and not want blood. I told you when we first got together Dri, I don't want you for blood I want you for you"
"You just want my body" I smirked at him I noticed his eyes look me up and down
"You're right, you have a killer body. So much better than everyone else I've been with" he placed one of his hands on my ass and gripped it to pull me closer to him allowing him to kiss me but I pulled back and frowned at him. "What's wrong?"
"Sex, you have had sex with multiple people both Moroi and dhampirs. Why haven't you tried with me?"
"Is this you telling me you want to have sex with me?" I shook my head at him. "Exactly, Dri I know what happened with Michael you told me so. If I didn't know then yes maybe I would have tried a few times by now but instead I let you control the pace. I don't want you to think for one second that I'm pressuring you into doing anything" he slipped his hand under my shirt and made soft circles with his thumb.
"Thank you" I smiled before leaning into him
He wrapped his arms tighter around me, I moved slightly to get more comfortable and his head ended up resting near my neck causing me to panic again. He pulled away, softly kissed my cheek and completely got off my bed taking a seat at my desk.
"Jer I'm sorry" I sat up and looked at him, I could tell he was hurt but he wasn't annoyed
"It's fine Dri. I don't understand why this would bring back those issues. It's not like it's nothing we haven't done before, it's like you don't trust me"
"I do trust you Jer, I didn't push you away. You pulled away yourself!"
"I could feel your heart rate rising, I knew you were starting to panic. I didn't want to go any further in case you really freaked out"
"But yet you didn't let me try and calm down, the only way I got over my problems was because I made friends with Moroi. It's exactly the same Jer"
"Then what do you want from me, you can't keep pushing me away every time things go too far. I'm not going to sit around acting like I'm only just friends with my girlfriend"
"How is that any different to if you wanted sex and I didn't?" I didn't mean to sound so angry but I was. He was so considerate when he first got here but now he was pushing me.
"I'm sorry Dri, I just don't know why it would affect the friendships you already have"
"Please come back over here" he sat there for a second before moving back to the bed. "It's the whole feeding thing Jer, knowing that's what he did to me as well as everything else"
"I get that but I've already told you. I don't want that with you, as you said earlier I only want you for your body" he grinned at me and I could help the smile on his face. He always knew how to make me smile and even though this was a difficult situation he was still trying to me smile.
"And there is the smile I love to see you on so much" he reached over and caressed my cheek.
"Thank you for coming here, I may have panicked when I shouldn't have but I promise I will try Jer" I leaned closer to him and he wrapped his arms around me.
"Dri I will always be here for you, please don't ever forget it" he leaned down and softly kissed me.
A/N: gabergirl thank you for reviewing! Don't worry about not realising about my summer break, sometimes I forget most people on here are American. Unfortunately there won't be another scene between Nikolaus and Dimitri for a while as he isn't meant to be at the academy but maybe when the school year finishes up and Dri goes back to Court.
