SONG: The Black Ghosts - The Repetition Kills You


Chapter 29

An Audience

BPOV

I started slightly as I heard a soft tap on the front door.

Edward. I thought instantly.

I hastily got up from the kitchen table, throwing my half eaten bowl of cereal into the sink. Then I straightened my blouse and smoothed my hair, grabbed my jacket and backpack and walked to the front door.

I had been sitting in the kitchen for nearly half an hour, waiting for him, after waking up early and getting dressed unusually quickly. He wasn't late; I was just anxious and excited about him picking me up for school, about seeing him again. I had made myself some cereal and started to eat it, but my mind had drifted back to last night and I completely forgot about it, the spoon still in my hand as the cereal grew soggy in the bowl.

Edward had been in my room last night.

I had felt terrible after Jake had left. I had basically just sat down in my room and sobbed for the rest of the evening because, well, I would miss Jake. I mean, we had basically seen each other every day over the past week, or if we didn't see each other we would talk on the phone. I wanted to call him, apologise or something, but I was too afraid to. The hurt expression on his face, in his eyes haunted me.

I knew I was meant to call Edward but I just...couldn't call him either. Firstly, I didn't really know what to say to him. Secondly, I couldn't exactly talk while I was still sobbing pathetically. And thirdly, I realised that I had actually never called him before and was nervous about doing it.

I had plucked up the courage to call him eventually and I did, only to find that he wasn't answering his phone. I let it ring out for a while; then even called again afterwards, but still, there was no reply. I had figured that he was probably asleep and I was so tired myself; that I just wanted to have a really hot shower and crawl into my bed.

It was after I had come out of the shower and was in my room, drying my hair and body with my towel, that I had heard the quiet tap against my window. At first I ignored it, I mean, it was so soft it could have just been a twig or something being blown at the window by the wind. I had continued drying my hair when I heard the tap again, and that time I had been almost sure that it was intentional, so I moved over to the window and there it was again. I peeked out of my curtains and could only see the darkness of the forest near my house, the moon hidden by the cloudy sky, my truck parked in the driveway – and wait – a silver car across the road. It couldn't be, I had thought, it couldn't possibly be Edward Cullen's car. But it looked exactly like it, the silver rims shining in the faint moonlight. Then I had noticed a slight movement in my periphery, and had glanced down to find Edward peering up at me.

I was stunned. What was he doing outside my house? And at that time? I had thought. Then I had decided that I didn't care why he was there. Because now that he was there, I wanted him to stay. So I had crept into the hall, silently, listening out for my dad's snores. His TV was on so I couldn't hear whether he was awake or not but I decided to chance it anyway. I threw the keys down to Edward and waited for him at my bedroom door nervously, praying that my dad was asleep and couldn't hear him coming up the stairs, because I could hear them creaking noisily under his heavy footsteps.

Then, when he had come into my room and it had registered that Edward Cullen was in my room, in my most personal space, my face had warmed up. There was also the fact that I was wearing my old sweatpants and t shirt, after hastily throwing them on after I had spotted him outside the window. I wasn't even wearing a bra. He was in my personal space, seeing a private part of me, and although I had blushed, it actually didn't feel uncomfortable for him to be there.

It had felt....right.

I wouldn't have even minded him sitting on my bed, but he seemed hesitant to, and he ended up sitting at my desk instead. I noticed him gazing around my room curiously and was puzzled by his expression. For some reason he looked like he was fighting a smile, but I couldn't think why.

After our heated conversation, when Edward had walked over to me at the bed, I don't know why but I became very aware that we were alone together in a room. A room with a bed. I had flushed at the thought, and Edward's hand on my face didn't help matters either. His touch sent a warm shiver through my body, and I could feel the warmth stopping in between my legs. Then I couldn't help wanting to touch him, to hold him, and his hug had made the feelings even worse. The heat between my legs started increasing and I'm not sure but I think my nipples even tightened against his chest. He seemed to pull away at just the right moment, because I'm sure that if he had kept holding me like that, for even just a few more seconds, I wouldn't have been able to control my...urges.

I opened the front door and Edward was leaning against the frame, that dazzling crooked smile on his face. As usual, my heart rate increased a little as I took in the sight of him. He was wearing dark blue jeans; as usual they were low on his hips, exposing the rim of his boxers. He wore a deep green, long sleeved shirt which fitted him quite snugly, accentuating his lean, muscular form.

"Hey." He said, smiling wider, "Are you ready?"

I nodded, for some reason I was suddenly unable to speak.

We walked over to his car, and in a gentleman-like manner, he held open the passenger door for me before he went around to the driver side. As soon as I sat in the cool leather seats, the gorgeous scent of his cologne engulfed me, and I sighed softly, savouring it. I noticed a dark blue sweater lying on the back seat and my fingers itched to pick it up and inhale. The scent was like a drug to me.

Once again, my heart leapt up into my throat as the car tore down the street. Why did he drive so fast?

"God Edward, why do you have to drive so fast?" I asked him, unable to tear my eyes away from the road.

He grinned. "I don't know, habit I guess. And anyway, what's the point of driving slow when you can get to where you're going quicker, if you drive fast?"

"But we don't need to get to school quickly, we're early."

He was quiet for a moment, seemingly thinking about something, his lips pursed a little.

"Hmmm, you seriously don't like me driving fast?" he asked, eyebrows raised; glancing at me.

"Not really." I mumbled.

"I thought girls loved that shit." He said, more to himself than me.

"Not this girl." I muttered.

He snickered, and eventually I began to feel the car slowing down, the words on the road signs once again becoming intelligible.

I let out a breath and he chuckled.

School was an embarrassing, exasperating, blush inducing, blur.

Of course, as soon as Edward parked in his usual spot in the parking lot and we both got out of the car, the open mouthed stares began.

I was annoyed by it. Really annoyed in fact.

Because it was really quite insulting for people to look so shocked that I, Isabella Swan, would be coming out of Edward Cullen's car, I mean really, was I that hideous? I was also annoyed at my face, and the way that my blood seemed to always flow to it, because I was undoubtedly bright red as usual. But the things that annoyed me the most; the things that made my fist clench into my palm, were the snippets of the whispered conversations I heard as I walked past,

"I bet Edward was dating her and Tanya at the same time."

"Are they dating? What about her boyfriend? That guy with the motorcycle?"

"I always knew there was something skanky about her. She was too quiet, too shy..."

"She probably stole Edward away from Tanya."

"Ugh, what does Edward see in her? I mean, c'mon, look at me, I'm hot!"

"I bet she dumped her boyfriend for Edward."

"No, I bet she's dating both of them at the same time!"

My irritation must have been clearly showing on my face, seeing as my face always gave away my emotions, because Edward leaned over to whisper, "Are you ok?" in my ear as we walked through the halls. He was walking me to my French class, even though I had insisted that he shouldn't because his algebra class was all the way on the other side of the building. He didn't hold my hand or anything, like before, but he walked very close to me, so close that his arm would occasionally brush against my arm. The gawking as we walked the halls was beyond ridiculous, and I was getting more and more irked as we walked on. I didn't even bother to answer Edward's question because it was clear that I wasn't 'ok'.

Alice didn't help to get rid of my annoyance. In fact, she made it worse. When Edward and I reached my French class, it got a little awkward because he didn't really know what to do to say goodbye. I mean, I could tell that he wanted to kiss me, just a small peck on the lips like he had done last night, but he wasn't sure if it was too forward of him to do that. Especially seeing as we were under constant examination by the nosy, gossip starved students of Forks High. In the end, he just ended up stroking my cheek quickly before saying, "See you in biology," and hurrying over to his class. I heard a familiar, audible squeal coming from the classroom, and when I walked in and over to mine and Alice's desk – ignoring the stares – she was grinning at me from ear to ear, her foot tapping excitedly under the table.

I groaned inwardly, bracing myself for the excitement and squeals and questioning that I would certainly have to endure.

"Details. Now." Was my 'good morning' from her.

I sighed. "Not now Alice."

She scoffed. "Are you crazy? You think I'm going to wait until we get home from school to hear about what's going on with you and Edward? I mean, there's no way you'll tell me at lunch seeing as he'll be there, and we have no other classes together so you better starting spilling Isabella Swan, and don't be stingy with the details."

I groaned. "Alice, you drive me insane! I can't explain everything fully now anyway because Mr Rosa will start complaining."

"Bullshit. You know he doesn't give a damn. We're always talking in this lesson, the only reason he tells us off once in a while is because he has to, to make it seem like he cares. Now c'mon, I'm getting impatient here."

I sighed again, and reluctantly started explaining to her about me and Edward's talk yesterday, about the making out against the wall, – and she squealed at that part causing Mr Rosa to frown in our direction – about the part with Edward coming over when Jacob was there, - and she grimaced at that part – about Edward coming over to my house last night and the talk we had, – and she 'awwed' at that part causing me to roll my eyes – then I told her how he said he would pick me up for school this morning and that he did.

I was amazed by her enthusiasm, I mean, it was me that the events had happened to, and even I wasn't as excited as she was.

Ok, that was a lie, I was totally as excited as she was of course, but I hid it well.

"Oh my God Bella I was so right wasn't I! You were so pessimistic about the whole thing, 'no he doesn't want me, he wants that skank Tanya, woe is me, blah blah blah', but I kept telling you over and over that he liked you, and I was freaking right as usual!"

I rolled my eyes, but I couldn't stop the small smirk that played around my lips.

"You two make like the cutest couple –"

She was getting a little ahead of herself, I mean; we hadn't even been on a date yet.

"Err Alice; we're not a 'couple'. We haven't even gone out on a date yet."

She rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, you soon will be a couple."

Walking to second period, scowling at the floor as I tried to ignore the looks and block out the whispers, Mike Newton suddenly appeared next to me, keeping up with my quick footsteps.

"Hey Bella, how's it going?" he asked, smiling very widely at me – the smile obviously forced.

I was confused. Why was Mike Newton talking to me? Had he forgotten that I had told him to not bother me? He hadn't spoken to me since that day at lunch, and he didn't sit with us anymore either. I had caught him glowering at me and Jake a few times when Jake had come to meet me after school, but he had never said anything to me.

Until now.

"Hey Mike." I said dully, barely glancing at him and quickening my pace even more.

"So...what lesson have you got now?"

"Biology." I said tersely, teeth clenched.

Mike Newton was added to the list of reasons of why I was annoyed today.

"Oh right. So...so you and Cullen huh?" he said, his fake smile wavering a little.

"Me and Cullen what?" I questioned, exasperated.

"Uh nothing." He said defensively, "I was just wondering if, you know, if you two are like, you know, a thing now."

"What's it to you if we are?" I snapped.

His jaw tightened a little.

"Nothing. Only I was kind of hoping...you know, that it wasn't true...coz I was kind of...hoping that we could be friends again, you know, maybe go out for a bite to eat –"

My head snapped up to glare at him incredulously. What the hell was wrong with him? Why couldn't he understand that I didn't want anything to do with him?

"Look Mike, it's irrelevant for you to hope anything when it concerns me, because whether it's true or not, - which is none of your business anyway – you wouldn't have a chance in hell with me regardless. I'm going to say this, and I'm going to say this for the last time."

I stopped walking and turned to him.

"Leave. Me. The. Hell. Alone."

I was so through with being polite. I actually don't even know why I was so mad; normally stuff like gossip and Mike Newton didn't bother me so much. Maybe I was PMSing.

Edward was smiling crookedly at me when I sat down next to him in biology. I couldn't help the answering smile I flashed him – until I looked around and noticed the whole class watching us. The smile was swiftly replaced by a scowl. Mr Banner came in shortly after, thank goodness, so our audience was forced to resort to glancing at us every few minutes instead of full out staring. Jessica Stanley, however, still openly glared at me, her nose scrunched up in disgust. What was up with that?

"What's wrong?" Edward whispered to me, leaning close.

"The staring. It's bugging me." I replied, my face heating up slightly at his close proximity.

He laughed softly.

"I guess I've grown immune to it now coz it doesn't bug me at all anymore. Just try to ignore it."

So I did.

The rest of the day became a blur. I ignored all the stares when I walked into the cafeteria for lunch, when I walked to my last three lessons after lunch, in my last three lessons, and then in the parking lot where I hastily got into Edward's car and we drove away. I sighed in relief when we were finally out of the school and Edward chuckled.

He parked in my driveway and we sat in his car for a bit, listening to a CD. Then he stroked my cheek softly, while gazing intently into my eyes and said he would see me tomorrow. I was just about to open the car door to get out when he suddenly grabbed my hand. I turned to face him slowly and he reached out to my face again, this time cupping my cheek. My heart started pounding frantically as he leaned towards me slowly and pressed his lips to mine. He kissed me slowly, passionately, his hand caressing my cheek softly while I stroked his hair. We just stayed there for a few minutes, kissing, and the windows started fogging up.

Eventually he leaned back, gazing at me again; a look in his hazel eyes that made my pulse race even more, and cause heat to slowly start creeping in between my thighs.

Lust.

I felt intoxicated as I finally got out of his car, even stumbling a little as I walked into my house, sighing as I closed the door behind me, a contented grin etched on my face.


Author's Note:

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Savannah-Vee