What Was Lost

Chapter 28 - Consequence

Shepard stared at the asari. "Liara is here?" She could barely believe it. What the hell happened? She sells me to Cerberus and is now an information broker?

"Yes, Shepard. She's one of the more reputable brokers on Illium currently." Shepard frowned - Lanteia had obviously not understood the nature of her surprise.

Liara is here! I... She didn't know what to feel about the news. Part of her wanted to ask where she was and head there right now. Another wanted nothing to do with her. After all, Liara had abandoned her to Cerberus. And still another part...

Shepard glanced over to Tali. The quarian hadn't said anything so far, but Shepard could tell she was troubled by the news too. She kept alternating between looking down in thought and peering her way. Shepard wished she could tell more about what she was thinking.

"Shepard?" Miranda also looked worried.

"Yeah." She shook her head. "Let's go to the docks and meet your friend. If he really did have to change plans so suddenly, he probably could use some help."

"Thanks." Miranda sounded relieved, which was a bit unusual for her. "I... Thank you."

Tali, on the other hand, didn't say anything. She merely headed over to the nearest taxi terminal and hailed them a cab. Shepard tentatively reached out to take her hand, but the quarian stepped back just before she could touch her.

Damn it! Things were finally starting to go well, sort of, and now... She looked over at Tali again, and sighed. The quarian was definitely upset about this revelation, and Shepard couldn't blame her, even if it wasn't her fault, either.

The cab ride to the dock was even more uncomfortable. Miranda brooded, obviously anxious to catch up to Niket and her sister. She kept checking her omnitool, watching for any changes in ship departures. Shepard had briefly tried to go over a plan with her, but she barely paid attention.

Tali, meanwhile, spent the ride staring out the window. Shepard was fairly sure she wasn't looking at the city, but was doing her best to avoid the situation. One name, one stupid name, and now things between them were worse than they had been even on their date.

"Tali..." She tried again.

"We'll talk later, Shepard." The quarian replied coldly. She turned in her seat, cutting off any chance at further conversation.

On the whole, I think I'd rather just have mercs or geth shooting at me. It would be easier to deal with, at least.


Tali seethed. Simply seeing Shepard's reaction to Liara's name had been bad enough. Now, the woman kept trying to... Tali wasn't sure, but the whole situation made her mad. Very mad.

I don't care what she says, if she gets that shocked just hearing Liara's name, she's not over her yet. I really don't need to hear her excuses right now. At least she didn't try to justify going to see her. I'm not sure I could handle that right now.

After their last encounter on the Citadel, she wasn't interested in seeing the asari either. Not yet, anyway. She did need to at some point, to clear up a few things. Namely, make sure Liara understood the situation. She had abandoned Shepard, and they all knew it now. And Shepard had chosen Tali.

She needed to make sure Liara accepted that. Shepard was hers now. Glancing at her, Tali realized she needed to make sure the human understood that too.

What to do, though? She kept trying to come up with a plan. Something... Anything... That upset her, too. She didn't like feeling so helpless. Too much of this depended on how she handled Shepard. She couldn't afford to mess it up.

I wish I could really know how she feels about Liara right now. Not that she's likely to know, herself, but still. If only...

She shook her head. 'If only' didn't help her right now. Focus. After this thing with Miranda and her sister is over, I have to do something.

Problem one - Liara. The asari was obviously a successful information broker, which meant she'd find out about Shepard being here sooner rather than later. She gave Shepard up, she can't just walk back in and pretend she didn't. I won't let her.

Problem two - Shepard. The woman was obviously shaken, which was good. She didn't want her running back to Liara. Unfortunately, that lead to problem three...

Me... She brooded. I... I need to do something for her, make her understand. She keeps saying things between us are okay, that the suit doesn't bother her, but I know that's not totally true. I messed up our date, I'm stuck in this suit, and she keeps being so understanding. I love her for it, but it does make me a bit mad.

Tali sat up, thinking about that more. Hopefully Mordin would be able to help her with the suit problem soon, but that still left the failed date. She had tried to get Shepard to see her point, but the woman had distracted her. Not that she minded all that much, at the time.

Is she right, though? Should I just be happy with what we have now?


Liara read the docking list again, shocked. She hadn't made a mistake - the Normandy SR-2 was indeed docked in Illium right now. Which meant...

Shepard is here! She's here, somewhere, right now. I have to find her. I need to!

She set aside the pad, glancing briefly at a second one, containing her notes on the Shadow Broker's known agents on Illium. I'm so close to finding the Observer, can I really just put it aside now? Even for Shepard?

Of course, while I know the ship is here, I don't know where she is. If I leave, if I go looking randomly, I could miss her. I could also wait at the ship, but there's no guarantee she won't just take a shuttle or simply stay on board. It's unlikely, but still, I have to consider it.

She put the Broker information back on her desk. It could wait. She had a chance, at last, to make things up with Shepard. To have her back.

Liara still hesitated, however. Part of her knew it wouldn't be that simple to get Shepard back. That small part of her mind kept whispering to her, telling her all the problems. All the doubts she had carried for the past few months rushed back to her, gnawing it her.

You gave her up, the small voice told her. You sold her to Cerberus. You left her, forgot about her. You gave her no way to find you again. Is it any wonder she never came looking for you?

Try as she might, she couldn't ignore the truth of it. She had given Shepard to some of her worst enemies. She had left her, not bothing to even prepare a message if the wild hope of a plan worked. And worst, she had forgotten about her for a time, losing herself in revenge.

She gathered a few things and headed out the door. No matter how logical it would be to wait, to send a message and see, she couldn't. She had to try, to do something to make up for everything that had happened in the past two years.

Looking around, she set off towards the spaceport district. She had to start somewhere.


Miranda hugged her sister one last time before stepping back and letting her rejoin her family. Shepard had been right - she had needed to talk with her.

Oriana smiled back at her. It still amazed her how quickly they had connected. They had spent the last hour talking as if they had known each other their whole lives. No weirdness, no awkwardness. I really do have to thank Shepard.

The only thing that put a damper on her mood was Niket. Learning he had betrayed her and then having to watch the Eclipse merc kill him had been hard. He had been her oldest friend, but her father still managed to twist him against her.

Still, as much as that hurt, she had gained a sister, for real. She promised to keep in touch with Oriana as much as possible, and to visit when the mission with the Collectors was over. Oriana asked to visit the Normandy one day, too, and Miranda had agreed easily. She didn't really see Shepard having a problem with that.

She waved farewell to Oriana and went back to the small cafe where Tali and Shepard were waiting for her. Just looking at the two of them, she could tell that things were still very strained between the commander and the quarian. She wished she could help them, but it didn't seem likely right now.

"Thank you two." Tali sat up, shocked from her thinking, as she spoke. Miranda noted how she glanced over towards Shepard, then quickly back to the balcony outside. Yes, something had definitely happened between them, something not good. If she had to guess, it was Lanteia mentioning Liara.

Shepard merely nodded, also lost in thought. Miranda worried. Shepard usually wasn't this withdrawn. The situation must really be bothering her for her to shut down like this.

Miranda joined them in silence, trying to think of a way to help her friends.


Tali was a bit surprised when Miranda pulled her off to one of the cafes dotting the street. Especially when the woman motioned for Shepard to go on ahead of them. She wasn't sure what the Cerberus woman wanted to talk about, but she guessed it was probably about Shepard.

"Okay, what didn't you want Shepard to hear?" Tali decided to go ahead and get it out of the way.

"Was I that obvious?" Miranda sighed. "I hope Shepard didn't notice."

Tali couldn't help giggling a bit. "I don't think you have to worry about that. She can be a bit clueless about things like this."

"Yes, well." Miranda looked a bit embarrassed. "I... I wanted to help you two. You've done so much for me, I wanted to be able to do something for you."

"You don't have to, Miranda." Tali was a bit surprised by this from her. "We were happy to help."

"Tali, you two gave me back my sister. I owe you more than I can ever repay."

Tali smiled at that. Watching Miranda and Oriana had indeed cheered her immensely. That kind of thing was what she was fighting for. Yes, she still wanted to save the colonies, but seeing people, real people, and helping them directly, was important to her.

"I... I'm sorry if what Lanteia said messed things up between you two." Miranda continued. "I wanted to know if there's anything I can do to help fix it."

"Thanks, but I think this is something we have to work out for ourselves."

"Still... There has to be something I can help with."

Tali hesitated. "I don't know what to say, Miranda. I'm not sure what I should do now. I mean, how do I make sure Shepard doesn't go running back to her?"

"I doubt she would do that, Tali."

"I can't help worrying about it. I mean, she can even touch her, no suit or stupid medications or anything..." She sighed. "I don't get what she sees in me, sometimes."

"Don't be an idiot. She's lucky to have you." Miranda smiled warmly at her.

Tali felt better, hearing that. "I know, I just wish..."

"You could always just throw her down on her bed next time you get the chance." Miranda laughed at her own joke.

"Yes, I could..." Tali laughed too, but part of her was still thinking about it...


Garrus was bored. Kasumi had been gone for at least an hour, following Shepard. He was still waiting in the shop for her to return. He hadn't spotted the thief or even had word from her on his link. He was debating how much longer he wanted to wait for her.

He was staring out the window when movement caught his attention behind him. A human had sat down in the other chair. "Took you long enou..." He trailed off. "Oh hell."

"Yeah, well, fuck you too." Jack grinned at him.

"What are you doing here?" He groaned inwardly. He really didn't need this now.

"Was just wandering a bit. Kept getting followed by those asari cops and I'm a bit tired of it. Figured I'd stop in here and see what you were up to before I do something that would mega piss Shepard off."

"Well, I'm not doing anything right now, just killing time." He figured bringing up Kasumi probably wouldn't be the best idea.

"Eh, whatever." She shrugged. "Nothing fun here anyway. Damn asari have too many regulations and shit. Takes all the fun out of things."

"So what are you going to do then?"

"That's sorta why I stopped in. Figured we could hang or something."

"Really?" He was a bit surprised. Jack not only caring about how her behavior affected the crew, but also wanting to do things with others? This was definitely new.

"Why not?" She didn't sound mad, simply curious. "We can find something to do, probably."

"Just understand, I'm not..." He paused, trying to focus his thoughts. "The other night, that was a one time thing. Too much alcohol and post-fight tension, you know?"

"Shit, you really are full of yourself." She laughed at him. "You think just cause we fucked once, I'm gonna let you do it again?"

"What?" He couldn't believe it. "You're the one who kept wanting one more round, over and over."

"Yeah, it was pretty good, but shit, you said it yourself, one night of too much booze and shit." She smirked at him. "Guess we all make mistakes."

"Mistakes?" He growled. "I might have had too many, but I don't see what you have to complain about. I mean, you took advantage of me."

Jack laughed louder. "Me? Wow, you really don't remember shit about that night, do you?" She grinned widely. "You're the one who started it. Not me, you." With a superior look on her face, she leaned back in her chair. "So yeah, I didn't take advantage, you did."

"Liar."

"Not this time." She crossed her arms. "Besides, I don't see what you have to complain about. If you didn't like it, why did you keep going so many times that night?"

"Like it bothered you. The only thing I can remember is waking up and having you practically jump me."

"I said we all make mistakes." Jack winked at him, to make sure he got her meaning.

"I'm the mistake now?" He growled.

"Aww, getting a bit pissed off?" She was grinning even wider - and worse, she was right. He was getting angry. And the last thing he wanted was to give her the satisfaction of getting to him. Still, this...

He shook his head. "Look, I'm just going back to the ship. I don't want to make trouble here." Shepard would be mad if anything happened and messed up the mission with Miranda's sister. He was better off just going back aboard and waiting. It would certainly be better than staying here with her.

"Wuss." He stopped and turned, looking back at her.

That was it.


Liara sighed. So far, her vigil of the dock the Normandy currently occupied had accomplished nothing. She hadn't spotted Shepard in the hours she had sat there, or any other familiar face. In fact, she couldn't even confirm with the spaceport that Shepard was here at all.

This sure has been a waste of time. If she's here, it's probably important. She'll be on a mission or meeting a contact, or something. She wouldn't simply be wandering around.

The only question now was, how much longer was she going to wait? She didn't want to spend her whole day sitting and doing nothing, but at the same time, this was proving to be rather useless.

Five more minutes. She could wait that long. Just five more minutes.


Shepard was a bit surprised when Tali took her hand upon rejoining her after her little talk with Miranda. She still wasn't sure what the two of them had needed to talk about, but figured it was none of her business anyway.

Either way, Tali seemed to be in a better mood now. "Are you two ready to head back to the ship?" She asked the other women.

"I'm going to stay for a bit, Shepard. I'll stick around until Oriana's shuttle leaves. I want to make sure they don't have any more problems."

"I understand." Shepard nodded to her. "Comm if you need us. I'll make sure EDI knows to patch you through right away."

"Thanks, Shepard." The other human kept staring at the spaceport. "I know their shuttle isn't leaving for another hour yet, but I wish it would hurry up, already. I'll feel so much better once they're off Illium."

"I don't blame you." She paused, sharing a glance with Tali, who nodded. "Are you sure you don't want us to stick around, just in case?"

"I'll be fine. I need a little time to deal with..." Miranda trailed off, then started over. "I just need a little time. See you back at the ship, Shepard."

Tali waited until they were a little ways from Miranda, then turned to Shepard. She wrung her hands and gulped before speaking to her. "I... I wanted to say sorry for how I acted earlier. And..." The quarian paused. "...And I'd understand if you wanted to go by Liara's office."

"I don't." Shepard said firmly. She really didn't want to get into that, not now.

"Are you sure?"

"Tali, it's over between me and her. I'm not interested in reopening old wounds." She squeezed the quarian's hand. "Let's go home."


Liara walked dejectedly back to the taxi stand. Her 'five more minutes' had turned into almost three hours. And there was still no sign of Shepard.

Idiot! What did you expect? That this would turn out like some romance vid and she'd show up and forgive you and you'd live happily ever after?

The worst part was she realized that even if she knew it would turn out like this, she'd have shown up anyway. The need to see Shepard again, to try making things right between them, was a burning drive inside her.

She stopped just before getting in the cab. There in the distance, the human walking past the docks towards the airlock... the hairstyle was different, but the color was the same... it was Shepard!

She ran, not caring what the people around her must be thinking. She managed to get back to the Normandy's dock just as Shepard opened the airlock and made to step inside. She called out, hoping to stop her before she got back in the ship.

"Shepard! Goddess, it is you!"

The human straightened up at the sound of her voice, but didn't turn around or reply.

Liara slowed, nearly stumbling. This... this wasn't how it was supposed to be. "Shepard, were you really just going to leave without seeing me?" She asked hesitantly.

Shepard paused in the airlock, then stepped inside, still not looking at her.

"Yes."

*Next Chapter: Samara and Thane join the Normandy. Liara, Tali and Shepard react to the meeting at the docks. What happened between Garrus and Jack. Kasumi returns to the ship, too.*