"Mister…. Zero…?" I repeated warily. I took a drag from my cigarette as I leaned back on the couch. 'If I remember correctly… Blueberry said that Mr. Zero was the enemy boss' codename… which would mean that the man on the other side of this Denden-mushi right now is… One of the Royal Shichibukai!?'
"It's already been quite some time since I sent you my orders," Zero said smoothly. "What is your status, Ms. Goldenweek? And where is Mr. Three?"
'Ms. Goldenweek and Mr. Three… they must be his agents that own the Denden-mushi here…' I thought before exhaling the smoke in my lungs. This was definitely an unexpected series of events. 'Alright, if I understand correctly… the current situation now is that I'm in the enemy's secret hideout and a guy named Mr. Three and some chick named Goldenweek are here on this island to hunt down the princess…'
I looked off to the side as I tried to puzzle out very quickly what I was going to do. He thought I was his agent Goldenweek, so I definitely shouldn't correct him. 'Damn it… I really shouldn't have been caught up in some stupid hunting game! I hope the guys haven't run into those agents and gotten into trouble…'
"What are you being so silent for?" Zero asked. "I'm asking you a question. Have you eliminated Princess Vivi and the Strawhat Pirates or not?"
I exhaled a long stream of smoke and flicked some ash away as I quickly came to a decision. "Yes, we've carried out our mission, alright. All the people who know of your secret are now no more, so there is no more need for further pursuit," I told him casually.
"I see. Good work… The Unluckies are headed your way right now. Once they confirm your mission's success, they'll hand you a certain package," Zero said on the other side of the phone.
"The Unluckies? A package?" I echoed, not sure what that meant exactly, but able to tell it was significant.
"That's right. An Eternal Pose to Alabasta…" My eyebrow went up at that instantly. "Once you have it, head to Alabasta with Mr. Three immediately. The time has come… we must now carry out the most crucial step of our plan. You will await further details, once you arrive at Alabasta."
I would have answered, but I was distracted by a very odd sight. A vulture with a floral headscarf and an otter wearing a leopard print leotard were standing in the two windows of the wax room. Both of them had sunglasses on, and neither looked particularly happy, though how a vulture manages to look unhappy, I wasn't entirely sure. "The hell…"
The vulture suddenly revealed what looked like flame throwers on it's back with a click while the otter pulled out spiked fans. "What's the matter?" Zero asked.
"No, it's n-"
Suddenly, the barrels on the back of the vulture exploded. Thankfully, they weren't flamethrowers and just regular cannons. That was a sentence I never would have thought would ever be thought by me. Luckily, I was able to jump out of the way before the bullets hit the couch, shattering it instantly. "Gah! What the hell are they!?" I demanded, losing my cigarette in the process. I had to dodge again, leaping this time. As the otter dashed forward and tried to gouge me apart with its fan, I planted my right foot and swung around. "Trying to kill me, are you now? That's some big balls you've got, you damned, dirty, four-eyed monkey!" I shouted as I slammed my foot into the back of the otter, bashing him very hard into the wall.
There was a click, and I glanced up to see the vulture had those guns or whatever pointed at me. I quickly did a flip and caught the bird's head between my feet. "Didn't I tell you… to quit it, you overgrown chicken!?" I demanded before turning in mid air. There was a sickening cracking sound as the bird's neck snapped several times.
I barely managed to get my foot under me to catch myself, but I did. "What happened?" Zero asked through the phone even as the vulture's body hit the ground with a thud. I lit myself a new cigarette as I went over and grabbed the receiver. "Oh, nevermind that. It's really nothing," I told him. "One of the Strawhats turned out to be just barely alive, but I finished him off for sure so worry not," I continued to lie.
"One of them… was alive?" Zero asked, and I easily detected a dangerous tone from him. One I definitely didn't like. I was very glad I didn't work for this guy. "Didn't you just say that you had carried out the mission successfully?"
"Ah, well, I thought we had. But one of the bastards was a lot more tenacious than I thought…" I said drumming my fingers on my knee somewhat nervously. I really hoped he bought this.
"So, in short, you had given me a false report at that time…"
I frowned. This guy had a major attitude. "Well, I suppose that's true if you want to get technical… but I really did finish him for sure just now. So, there's really no need for further pursuit. Capiche?"
There was a moment of pause before I got a reply. "Fine… Just head for Alabasta straight away then. This will be the last time I contact you by Denden-Mushi. I can't afford for the Marines to intercept any of our calls. From here on, orders shall be delivered the traditional way. That is all. Godspeed, Ms. Goldenweek." And, with that, the connection went dead.
I frowned at the receiver in my hand. "He hung up… such an ass," I said as I tossed the receiver to the side and got to my feet. My eyes drifted over to the two animals I'd easily taken care of. "So, what the hell were these things?" I asked myself, still slightly bewildered by their strange appearance.
I mean really, what animal wears leotards and headscarves? Something suddenly shifted, catching my attention. "Hm? This is a Pose thingy…" I said kneeling down to pick it up. It was bigger than the thing Nami wore on her wrist, and it had the word Alabasta carved on the top, but the red and white needle was unmistakable.
I examined it for a moment before putting it safely in the pocket of my skirt. A quick glance around told me there was little else I was going to get from this particular place, so I left. I did still have to find the others, after all. I started wandering the jungle, luckily not coming across anything too dangerous. It wouldn't have been hard to kill I didn't think, but it would have been an unpleasant delay. And with two enemy agents wandering around I couldn't afford delays. I had to find the others.
It felt like I was walking for hours. It certainly felt like it. Then, around the base of one of the mountains, I heard familiar voices. Joy welled up instantly, and I ran the last bit of distance. "Hellooooooo, Zoro and Luffy! …and you other people!" I greeted as I practically leaped into the clearing. "Thank God you're all safe!"
"Hey, Sonya!" Luffy greeted. I almost fell over to see that he wasn't wearing his usual vest and beneath was a surprisingly well-sculpted set of abs and a chest. I had seriously not been expecting such nice muscles on the owner of those skinny arms.
"She shows up now!?" I heard Usopp demand, but I didn't care.
Suddenly, I spotted a huge man who's hand alone was as tall as me sitting off to the side. "The hell is that!? Are you Mr. Three!?" I couldn't help but demand. I mean, he was huge. I didn't really want to fight a freakin' giant if he was an enemy.
"Huh? How do you know about Mr. Three?" Nami asked, and I nearly fell again, this time for a very different reason, though.
"Damn, orange head! Put on a shirt would you!?" I demanded in annoyance.
"I don't have one!" she snapped back. "It got burned!"
I couldn't help but snort some. "I know you don't have the best fashion sense, but I didn't think it looked that bad…"
"My clothes are a hell of a lot better than yours, blondie!" she said pointing at me with one finger.
"Then why do I always look so much classier?" I asked with a smirk.
"At least I'm not a damn chimney!"
"Hey hey hey!" Luffy said, jumping between us. "Did you find any jungle treats, Sonya!?" he asked, eyes sparkling. "That's what you were looking for right? Jungle treats!"
I scratched the side of my head. "Er… that's all back at the ship, Luffy…" I said even though 'jungle treats' wasn't exactly what I'd gotten.
"Yay! Adventure Jungle Treats!" Luffy cheered. "Can I have some when we get back!?"
"Sure Luffy," I said absently as I looked over the rest of the crew. Along with quite a few missing shirts (depressingly Zoro's was not missing), there were a fair amount of injuries including Zoro's feet nearly being severed at the ankle. "What the hell happened to all of you?" I asked as I took off my jacket and flung it at Nami I didn't really want to be seeing that much of her.
I got a very quick and somewhat jumbled run down from five different people at once; Nami screamed it, seemingly annoyed, Luffy was laughing while occasionally remembering what he was trying to tell me, Zoro kept getting cut off as did Vivi, and Usopp's voice was shaking. But, from what I could gather, they'd somehow ended up meeting these two giants who were in a hundred year duel or something, one drank a sabotaged barrel of rum, and the duel ended. Just as the duel ended Mr. Three appeared and there was a big fight involving lots of candle wax and a bit of fire. All in all, it wasn't a very helpful explanation, but I guess it would do for now since they did mention Mr. Three and his cohorts were defeated.
Then they all (mostly Nami and Usopp) demanded where I'd been, so I gave them a quick run down of everything that had happened while I was looking for them. I just left out the tea break thing because Nami looked about ready to explode as it was. But after I finished explaining the phone call they got very interested. "So then… just a moment ago… You were talking with Mr. Zero?" Vivi asked in shock.
Well, it was more than a moment ago, but I let that slide. "Yeah, I guess… it seems he mistook me for Ms. Goldenweek."
"And now he thinks that we're all dead!?" Vivi breathed.
"Yeah. Or at least that's what I told him," I agreed tapping some ash off my cigarette.
"Just when we finally throw off our pursuers we can't even step foot off of this island!" Usopp shouted, practically in tears.
"What?" I asked in confusion. "Do we still have unfinished business here or something? I mean, I managed to get this from them and all…" I said holding up the Eternal Pose that had been in my pocket. They all dropped their jaws and stared at me. It was somewhat disconcerting actually. "Huh? Wha?" I asked. I had mentioned that, right? I could have sworn I had…
"An Eternal Pose to Alabasta!" they cheered and most started to dance. Zoro thankfully didn't. I'd seen him dance back on Mirror Island and he was about as good at it as I was… "We can set sail!"
Suddenly, a streak of blue hit me, and Vivi was hugging me tight. "Thank you so much, Sonya! I was so worried over what to do!"
I gave her an awkward pat on the back. "Y-you're welcome… I didn't think it'd make you this happy…" I said; still a little freaked out by the reaction.
"Alright, guys! It's time for a senbei party!" Luffy screamed holding one senbei up triumphantly.
"Luffy! This ain't gonna be much of a party if we've only got three crackers left!" Usopp protested.
"This isn't the time for that," Nami told him sternly. "It's time to set sail, Captain! We can't just loiter around here forever!"
I got up from my seat on a fallen tree and brought my cigarette up to take a drag. "Ah, Zoro-kun, you haven't forgotten about our hunting contest, have you?" I asked him. I would understand if he had, it sounds like he'd had a fairly busy day after all.
"Hm? Oh, I'm sure I've won that. I caught a rhino 'bout thiiiis big," Zoro said holding his arms apart wide.
"A rhino?" I asked in confusion. "Can you even eat that thing?" I asked even as I racked my brain for any sort of 'rhino' recipes I could think of. I was certain I could think up something to do with it… it was still meat after all…
"Alright then, Mr. Round, Mr. Giant! We'll be taking off now!" Luffy shouted up at the two giants.
"I see… busy lil' buggers aren'cha?" the giant with the shorter beard said.
"It's a shame, but we won't ask you to stay longer," the other giant added. "I hope your country's safe, girl."
"Thank you," Vivi called back as we all started to head back to the river and therefore the Merry.
"See ya then! Don't die anymore!" Luffy shouted at the top of his lungs.
"Just you wait. My catch is definitely bigger," I told Zoro as we left the clearing behind.
"Ha, sure it is, Sonya," he replied seemingly unconcerned.
"Master! I'll go to Elbaf for sure one day!" I heard Usopp shout behind us. I wondered what exactly that meant, but put it out of my mind as unimportant.
We got back to the Merry without any huge events, and Zoro grabbed his kill and put it beside mine. "Mine's bigger," I said with a smile.
"No way. Mine is," Zoro said.
I giggled a bit. "Zoro-kun… my dino is clearly bigger. Look it goes way past yours."
Zoro scowled. "No. Mine is bigger than your rinky dinky dino!" he snapped.
I felt my temper starting to build and quickly. "Look! My lizard is clearly bigger," I said pointing down at the dino I was standing on.
"Are your eyes just for show or something? The bigger animal is my rhino!" Zoro growled pointing down at the beast he was standing on.
"Who cares, they both look pretty tasty to me," Luffy said from the railing of the boat.
"You stay out of this!" Both Zoro and I snapped. If I were a little calmer I'd have found it very endearing.
"How long are you two going to bicker? We can't even carry all that much meat. Just pack up as much as we need and let's go already. It's time to set sail!" Nami snapped from the balcony.
"You just have no concept of real tests of skill!" I snapped up at her, though I hated to admit she had a point. The storage room wasn't that big and wouldn't hold as much meat as we'd gotten. Maybe this hunting contest idea hadn't been so hot…
"Hey, Usopp. Mine's clearly bigger, right?" Zoro asked the marksman.
"Huh? I couldn't care less," Usopp replied.
"Is a tie no good?" Vivi asked.
"There's no tie in a contest!" both me and Zoro snapped at her.
I was tempted to keep arguing but like I said before, Nami did have a point. So, I begrudgingly butchered as much of the animals as I could and put the meat in storage before we started down the river. Luckily, I was an expert butcher, so it didn't take that long.
"If we sail straight from here, we should be able to exit on the western side of the island," Nami said as the Merry floated through the river.
"Do you think we should have packed more of that meat?" Luffy asked from his perch on Merry's head.
"Don't be stupid. We don't even have enough space to preserve any more than this," I told him sourly. I hadn't very much liked having to leave so much perfectly good food behind. The only reason I could justify it was that the animals in the jungle would eat it so it wouldn't truly go to waste.
"Are you trying to sink our ship?" Usopp asked incredulously.
"Ah! It's the Giants!" Luffy suddenly announced, and I looked up from what I was doing to spot the Giants on either side of the river's exit.
"They've come to see us off!" Usopp said with a huge grin. He'd apparently taken a very big liking to the Giants during our visit. It was a little surprising to me, but at least we'd found someone that he didn't run screaming from.
"The most important reason why all the little ones who come to this island," began the first giant.
"Do not reach the next island lies straight ahead," finished the other.
"What?" Nami asked, and I had to agree. Just what was so bad about endless smooth ocean waters? It was quite refreshing looking, actually.
"You all risked your lives so that our pride can remain untarnished," the taller of the two giants said, still not looking at us in our little ship.
"Thus, in turn, no matter the foe…"
"We must not let your flag of pride be tarnished either!"
"Trust in us and sail straight ahead! No matter what happens, sail only straight ahead!"
"What're they…" Zoro began but never got to finish.
"Got it! Sail straight ahead!" Luffy agreed instantly. "Farewell."
"Let us meet again," the Giants said drawing their weapons. "One day in the future."
"Look! Up ahead!" Nami nearly screamed. I could understand the reaction. The entire sea was rising up in front of us, and a huge fin was breaking the surface.
"So you've come, 'Island-Devourer'," one of the giants said.
"In the name of Elbaf, we vow to clear a path!" the other declared.
It took a minute but then a giant fish broke the surface of the water, creating huge waves and causing all around panic. The damn goldfish had teeth bigger than the Merry. It would be like being swallowed by Laboon all over again and that wasn't something I wanted to repeat.
"What is that thing!?"
"Is it a sea king!?"
"Does it really matter what the hell it is?" I demanded.
"Grab the helm or we're going to be swallowed alive!" Nami shouted.
"What in the world… is that a giant… Goldfish!?" Usopp asked, staring at it with wide eyes. "Huh? A giant goldfish? I feel like I've heard of that before…"
"Usopp! Hurry!" Nami shouted up at him.
"I… I won't!" he said almost firmly. It was actually pretty impressive. "We'll be going straight ahead! R-Right, Luffy?"
"Yup, you bet," Luffy agreed, perfectly calm as always.
"Don't be ridiculous! This is completely different than getting swallowed by Laboon!" Nami shouted, practically beside herself. I couldn't help but be nervous too. Dying by digestion was an irony I'd rather not experience.
"Yeah, yeah, just pipe down already. Here, I'll even give you the last Senbei," Luffy said holding it out to her.
"I don't need any senbei!" Nami snapped though she grabbed it from him anyway. "If we don't turn this ship around this instant, we'll-"
"Nami. Give it up already," Zoro told her.
She stopped shouting but instead turned to sobbing while munching on the senbei. Figures she'd be an emotion eater. The very very close mouth of the fish finally ruined the calm I'd managed to keep. I whipped around. "Luffy! You're sure those Giants are trustworthy, right?" I demanded.
"Yup," he answered. I couldn't help but whimper. I did not like this. I doubted there was an old man living inside of this one.
"Are you serious!? We're really going to sail straight into that monster!?" Vivi demanded.
"Oh no! It's too late to do anything now!" Nami screamed as the ship started rushing down the fish's throat.
"Straight ahead! Straight ahead!" Usopp screeched.
"What're you screaming for!? We've already been swallowed alive!" Nami shouted back at him.
"Straight ahead! Straight ahead!" Luffy chanted as well. Suddenly, the world seemed to explode, and we were flying through the open air. "Wooohooo! We're flying!" Luffy shouted as he jumped onto his usual seat.
"Don't turn back now! Fly straight ahead!"
"They're just so… freakin' big!" Luffy said with a grin.
"They cut… the ocean itself… so this is… the power of Elbaf's warriors…" Usopp said through a ridiculous amount of tears and noisy sniffing. "Absolutely stunning!"
"Now go!" I heard the Giants shout at us.
