A/N: I'm sorry, people! I honestly didn't mean to take a two month break from Rebellion, but life attacked me. My mom mentioned something against fanfic that blocked me, I fell out of the habit of writing, but I also tried to start original fics. I've gone through two ideas before settling on a rewrite of my '06 Nano. Also, I'm studying for my drivers permit.
Anyway, I'm back to writing, again. I love all the reviews, 20 reviews for this chapter and a few reviews throughout the entire story. But, shadowkitsune-chan raised a great point, I have reviewers, but I also have readers. And, I do have to say that I love everyone who just reads this fic, even if they don't review. Reviews are just like candy, though, and they are very good. So, while I have 451 reviews total, at this moment, I have 76802 hits on my story. That's a lot of people. Also, 20 reviews for this chapter, and 1703 hits for this chapter. So, I love all of you.
And now onto the story...
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The Masters of the Rebellion gathered together at the Slytherin table during breakfast on Thursday. Ron had protested at first, but Draco had refused to sit anywhere else. Besides, the Slytherin table had a better view of Snape, and that was important.
Snape had come to the Great Hall for breakfast, after a comment from McGonagall the day before. Of course, McGonagall didn't know what the Rebellion had planned, but it set a good example having all the professors at the table during meal times. Plus, most of the time breakfast was entertaining now in days.
Snape had yet to see that the Rebellion was sitting at the Slytherin table, mostly because he was avoiding looking at everything but his plate. He glared down at his plate as the Owl Post arrived, wanting to escape from the Great Hall. He was rewarded by his refusal to interact with the world by an apple falling onto his head.
Snape still did nothing, however, except to poke his eggs with his fork. He was awakened from his funk by three envelopes falling onto his plate. He cautiously poked them with his fork, waiting to see if they were booby-trapped. Nothing happened.
"What have you got there, Severus?" McGonagall asked. She had seen the group of students at the wrong table, even if Snape hadn't, so she knew there was something going on.
"Probably something that will turn my shoes pink, or some nonsense like that," Snape replied. He pushed the envelopes off of his plate.
"Isn't that Dumbledore's handwriting?" McGonagall pointed at one of the brightly colored envelopes.
"Do you think so?" Snape asked, sparing the orange envelope a glance.
"It seems to have his taste in colors as well," McGonagall continued. Maybe he was also behind the lime green and neon yellow envelopes, too.
"Why is he sending me anything, though? We just had the meeting on Tuesday," Snape asked.
"Maybe he forgot to tell you something," McGonagall suggested.
"Three times, I suppose?" Snape raised his eyebrow.
"Open them and find out." McGonagall turned back to her breakfast, keeping watch on Snape out of the corner of her eye.
Snape huffed, but reached for the orange letter. He used his wand to open the envelope and pulled out the contents. He scowled at the brightly colored card wishing him a Happy Birthday! The neon swirls of pink, green, yellow, blue, red, and orange began to move, as if absorbed by the large words on the cover.
"This better be important," Snape grumbled as he opened the card.
"What does it say?" McGonagall asked, giving up on pretending to ignore Snape.
"Make Peace, Not War. Have a Groovy Birthday. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore." Snape dryly read.
"Some kind of hidden message? Warning you against killing your favorite student?" McGonagall suggested, hiding her amusement.
"He's behind this, I know he is." Snape sent a glare at the Gryffindore table, not even aware of the fact that Harry wasn't sitting there.
"How about you open up the other ones, maybe they'll have an explanation." McGonagall handed Snape the lime green envelope, that could probably light up a dark room by itself.
Snape refrained from replying opened the envelope. This card wasn't as blinding as the first, or as blinding as the envelope would suggest. There was a monkey in the jungle on the front of the card, holding a bright yellow banana.
"This Monkey would like to sing you happy birthday," Snape read without prompting. He opened the card and began to read again, his eye dangerously twitching. "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, you look like a monkey, and you smell like one too. Cornelius Fudge."
"Well, it was nice of him to send you a card for your birthday," McGonagall offered.
"It isn't my birthday," Snape retorted, "You know that my birthday is in January."
"Well, this year has been busy, maybe they forgot?" McGonagall suggested.
"The headmaster gave me a present, remember?" Snape countered, raising an eyebrow at her.
"Why don't you open the next card?" McGonagall handed him the last card, the neon yellow envelope.
Snape grumbled to himself as he slit the envelope open and pulled out the card. The cover had a cartoon of a young boy staring out at the reader, a shocked expression on his face. Snape scowled at the large words in the speech bubble, but didn't read them out loud.
"Wow, you're old," McGonagall read for him, leaning closer in order to see.
Snape scowled even further at hearing it, but opened the card without prompting. He was slightly mollified by the words inside the card, however, the scowl returned when he read the signature at the bottom of the card.
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone," McGonagall completed the card. "Signed, Lord Voldemort."
"The nerve of him," Snape grumbled to himself.
"Severus?" McGonagall asked.
"He's over seventy years and he dares to call thirty-six old?" Snape clarified, a bit louder this time.
"We have agreed that he's not in his right mind, right?" McGonagall tried to reassure.
"But, still, he's about have my age, that gives him no right to call me old," Snape continued to rant, forgetting his suspicion that Harry was behind the whole thing.
"Maybe someone else picked out the card?" McGonagall usually disliked to talk about Voldemort, but this was too good to pass up. Especially with the fact that Snape didn't even seem aware that he was even discussing it with her.
"Could be, I suppose," Snape replied, running through the likely culprits in his mind.
"It's almost time for class," McGonagall reminded him, standing up to get to her own class.
Snape followed her out of the Great Hall, muttering to himself about the birthday cards. The cards remained on the table, as Snape was too distracted to remember him. Luckily, the Rebellion rescued them; stopping off at Umbridge's place to hand her a peanut.
-
The main members of the Rebellion were sure to get to class ahead of time. They didn't have long to wait before the rest of the fifth year Slytherin/Gryffindor class arrived, though, as they had asked everyone to come before class.
"What's going on?" Theodore Nott, the Slytherin who had taken over in Draco's stead, demanded.
"It's Professor Snape's birthday today, did you know that?" Harry replied.
"Professor Snape's birthday is in January," Nott said, staring at Harry.
"That's just what he wants you to think," Harry exclaimed.
"What?" Nott asked.
"He wants you to think it's in January, so that you don't make a big deal for his real birthday," Harry explained.
"No, I'm pretty sure that his birthday really is the ninth of January," Nott replied.
"So he says, so he says," Harry rumbled.
"Anyway, what are we doing here, during the last minutes of our free time?" Nott asked, tapping his foot.
"For many years he has thwarted all of our desires to hold him a birthday party," Harry started, pausing for a breath.
"You desired to throw Snape a birthday party?" Nott demanded, staring at Harry in disbelief once again.
"Don't you?" Harry asked, blinking at Nott.
"No, not particularly," Nott replied.
"Anyway, for years we've been deprived of giving him a party, but no longer." Harry thrusted his hand in the air.
"I'm afraid to ask," Nott muttered.
"Today, on Snape's real birthday, we will give him a party. A surprise party, the best party he has ever received," Harry finished.
"A surprise party? For Snape?" Nott asked, shaking his head.
"Potions Nightclub is still open for business and it's the perfect place for a surprise party," Draco pointed out.
"Finite Incantantum," Hermione cast, canceling the concealing charms on the room.
The nightclub now looked like it was ready for a party, decorated in brightly colored streamers. Harry bounced over to the bar area, which used to be Snape's desk, and picked up a stack of party hats.
"Come get your party hats," Harry called out.
"Party hats," Luna squealed, and rushed over to Harry. She proudly put the conical hat, decorated with pictures of bats, on her head. Everyone else stared at Harry like he was nuts.
"Fine, don't wear the party hats. Disappoint your favorite teacher," Harry said, putting the hats back on the bar.
"He's finally cracked," Dean whispered.
"Calling Snape our favorite teacher," Seamus agreed.
"We've been telling you," Pansy sniffed, tossing her hair over her shoulder.
"What is Loony Lovegood doing here, anyway?" Nott asked, focusing on something other than a Gryffindor throwing a birthday party for the Slytherin head of house.
"What are you talking about? Luna's always been here?" Tracey Davis asked, staring at Nott as though he was nuts.
"No, she hasn't," Nott yelped.
"You're right, she's missed a few classes. Probably off chasing after a yellow Pinta," Hermione replied.
"Professor Flitwick agrees that Yellow Pintas take precedence over Potions class," Luna said. "But, don't worry, the Showery Flox teaches me what I miss in class."
"Lovegood is a fourth year," Nott pointed out.
"Which means she belongs here," Harry agreed.
"This is a Fifth year class," Nott argued.
"Down is up, and up is down, Nott," Neville remarked.
"What about sideways?" Harry asked.
"Sideways is blue," Ron answered.
"He's coming, places everyone," Hermione called out. Her wand was glowing from the tripped alert charm set down the hall.
The Rebellion scrambled to get everything in place, helping their classmates find a place to hide. They were ready, though, and the room was dark by the time Snape opened the door.
Snape was scowling as he entered the room, annoyed at the lack of students waiting by the door. "Lumos."
"Surprise!" Harry was the first person to pop up from their hiding spots, the Rebellion and the rest of the students following his lead. As a result, the whole process was dragged out.
Snape gave them his most fearsome glare, causing a few students to cringe back from him. Harry just grinned in reply and ignored all of the warning signs.
"What is the meaning of this?" Snape asked, glaring at the decorations instead, hoping for a better reaction. The decorations refused to burst into flames and disappear, so Snape glared even harder.
"Happy birthday, Professor," Harry said. The banners started changing color, in spite of Snape's fierce glare.
"Why had my classroom turned into an eyesore?" Snape asked, trying to actually get an answer.
"It's your party, silly. Potions Nightclub has graciously allowed us to use the room and they provided the music and refreshments." Harry made his way over to the bar and picked up a cocktail glass. "Sparkling Apple Cider and apple pie for cake."
"Sparkling Apple Cider and apple pie?" Snape barely hid his flinch at the sight of the apples.
"It's better than health food." Harry shrugged before focusing back on the pie. He started lighting the sixteen candles that were stuck in the pie.
"What are you doing?" Snape asked.
"Lighting the candles, so we can sing 'Happy Birthday' and you can blow out the candles. Honestly, haven't you ever been to a birthday party?" Harry asked, lighting the last candle.
"Okay, everyone, it's time to sing." Hermione clapped her hands together before raising her wand. "Just follow the lyrics I create, and wish Professor Snape a happy birthday."
Snape stalked up to the front of the classroom, intending to put the candles out, and stop the whole thing. Hermione flicked her wand, and the music started up. A second flick created the lyrics for the song.
"Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo," Harry led the singing, "you look like a monkey, and you smell like one, too."
Snape growled as the students started to cheer. The fifth years, beyond the Rebellion, weren't really sure about celebrating Snape's birthday, especially the Slytherins who knew that Snape's birthday was in January. Of course, since there was pie, they didn't really mind taking part in one of the Rebellion's schemes.
"Now take a deep breath and blow out the candles," Harry instructed.
Snape flicked his wand and banished the pie. The students in the room, mostly the Gryffindors, groaned in disappointment. However, the pie reappeared after a second, the candles blown out.
"Hey, Harry?" Dean asked, leaning in to get a closer look at the birthday pie.
"Yes, fellow student?" Harry asked.
"Why are there only sixteen candles?" Dean asked, ignoring how strange Harry was acting.
"Fifteen for Snape's age, and one for luck. How do you feel, Professor, you're finally our age." This last part was directed to Snape, who decided to finally ignore every thing that came out of Harry's mouth.
"Everyone to your seats, and get your cauldrons and ingredients out," Snape ordered, using his wand to nudge Harry away from his desk/bar.
"But what about pie?" Ron asked.
"Forget about the pie, and focus on class. I know that's hard for your puny minds to handle, but do try," Snape said.
"But, pie," Ron wailed, sprawling across his desk in despair.
"Open your books to page 326," Snape instructed, ignoring his students.
"Accio pie," Harry called out, striking a heroic pose.
"Wingardium leviosa," Hermione cast a second later, as the pie threatened to splatter all over Harry. The pie was floated over to her desk, where she started cutting it into pieces.
"Aw, Hermione, what was that for?" Harry asked, slumping out of his heroic pose.
"You were about to get a face full of pie, since your hands were full," Hermione calmly explained. She started handing out plates of pie to the students crowding around her.
Snape threw his hands up into the air and stalked out of the classroom. Desperate times called for desperate measures.
No one really noticed that their professor was missing, their attention focused on the pie and the Sparkling Apple Cider. A small party did start up, even though their guest of honor was missing. Pie was consumed and dance music started up, students dancing in the middle of the room.
It was in the middle of these festivities that Hermione's wand started blinking, the alert charm going off again. The music abruptly shut off, stopping the party.
"Contingency plan number 52," Hermione called out.
"What does that mean?" Lavender asked.
"Everyone sit down, and pretend to behave. Snape has got reinforces, which means that we need to be on our best behavior and psych Snape out," Harry explained.
Everyone scrambled to sit down, mixing houses at times in their hurry. Cauldrons, kits, and books were pulled out and set up. By the time the door slammed open, the Gryffindor and Slytherin fifth years were innocently sitting in their seats.
- Chapter 29 - Happy Birthday, Snape! -
- The first ever cliffhanger in the Rebellion. So, a question for all of you, should Harry and The Rebellion go to the DoM at the end of the fic? -
