Heh, hey~ Look! I updated! Though...I probably should've done it sooner...sorry about that. Kistu seems to be one of the harder characters to get back into my head, so writing this chapter was a pain. There's not much going on in it either, though there's some mushiness at the end. but it's done and hopefully the next chapter will have a bit more action now that everything's getting back on the plot. ^^ please review though!


Everything between L and I had calmed down after what happened when I confronted him about Watari, and for a while, things had calmed down. I was still traveling between Near and Mello, passing around information, but I could tell Mello was getting anxious and I was beginning to worry about him doing something reckless. Near, however, had begun progressing when I discovered that Light had joined the National Police Agency and had already spoken with the president of the United States, creating the SPK (Secret Provision for Kira) in order to track him down. Thing was, that was months ago, and with no obvious progress being shown to Mello the past few years, I was worried something was going to happen. And that something finally showed itself when I was visiting Near at his SPK headquarters.

"So you sent in someone to contact the director?" I asked as I placed a puzzle piece in it's place, dressed as a ninja in all black with a mask covering most of my face except my eyes.

One could never be too careful with these cops and with Light being Kira, I'd rather he didn't have any way to know I was alive or any way of getting that information. Besides, I had plenty of costumes at my disposal, thanks to L and his infinite amount of money that he seemed to enjoy spending on me, for some reason. If he keeps it up, I'll have a different one for every day of the year. I places a had to my chin in thought as my eyes scanned the puzzle pieces, sitting in a crouch similar to L's, whereas Near and one of his men were not too far away listening and watching the screens as one of their men was speaking to someone in the Japanese police headquarters.

"Yes. We sent him in to confirm the existence of the notebook and that they have it."

"Hm…" I hummed, placing another piece down when I heard a bit of commotion coming from the headphones he was wearing. "Something interesting happening?"

Near ignored me, speaking to his man on the other side of his microphone as he made a card tower. "Near here. It seems as if the chief has been kidnapped indeed. So I want you to steer the conversation in the direction of cooperating with them to save him and apprehend the perpetrators."

What? My father's been…abducted? I frowned under my mask. Sure, my father hadn't treated me very well, but he was still my father and there were a few times that I remember when he treated me like every father should. He was still family.

"It's really not an issue whether he hands it over to us or not. They'll have to make preparations to swap it for their chief's life, don't you think? And while they're at it, we'll claim it-should the opportunity present itself, of course." Near said, as I thought.

Who would take the chief though? It has to do with the death note, obviously, but the only ones who know about that are the task force, the SPK, L, Mello's group and myself. And since the SPK and task force didn't do it…damn it. I frowned, getting up and catching Near's attention.

"Sorry for the short visit, Near. I need to check up on something."

Near nodded, turning back to his screen and his card tower. "Very well."

Wanting a bit more fun, I managed a smirk and threw a smoke bomb on the ground, pulling a disappearing ninja act and getting outside the building before the smoke disappeared. Once on my bike, I called up a very familiar chocolate loving addict.

"It's Kitsu, give me Mello." I growled out, waiting for the man on the other end to hand the phone over and once he did, I quickly expressed my displeasure. "Oi, what are you thinking, kidnapping the director?! I thought I said to wait!"

Mello groaned on the other end. "You and that white haired bastard were moving too slow."

"We were moving slow for a reason, Mello! If you just left this alone, we might already have the notebook already!"

"Yeah right! You really think they'd just hand it over?!"

I pinched the bridge of my nose, putting on a microphone so I could ride my bike and talk.

"I'm not stupid! Of course they wouldn't, but they would show us where they keep it and it would be a cinch for me to get it after that!"

"Che, well it's too late now. We're already moving in to grab the next one."

"Next one?" I muttered.

Suddenly, the pieces clicked into place as I realized what he was saying.

"Mello, what…what happened to the chief?"

"Killed himself with his necktie thanks to some morons falling asleep."

My hands gripped the bars of my bike tightly, and I could feel panic rising up as what he said began sinking in.

He laughed. "But that means Kira got him! And for Kira to get him means he had to be one of the ones who knew about his abduction! The chances of it being an actual suicide are slim anyway. I mean, he's a real idio-"

"Mello! We already know who Kira is!" I shouted, feeling my chest clench and my vision get blurry as tears slipped over my face. "Light is Kira! All we needed was proof! There was no need to…There was no need to kidnap the chief!"

"Well, it's too late for that now! Why the hell are you yelling at me for?! It's your fault for taking too long! We could've caught Kira already! And besides! I've made sure Kira won't be able to kill this one! There's no way he'll kill his own sister!"

Ice ran through my veins and I quickly shouted at him. "Don't do shit with her until I get there, understood?!"

"Che, whatever." Mello said, hanging up as I sped through the streets, cursing under my breath.

That idiot! He just-He made my father- "God dammit!" I shouted to no one, swerving around a corner as I headed to L and mine's safe house here in the states.

We had to move from Wammy's to here, thanks to Near teaming up with the US. It made traveling between him and Mello far easier, and it kept L nearby as well for when things grew too much. And right now, after what I had just discovered, everything was far too much. As I parked the bike and covered it up, I began my walk around the deserted warehouse looking structure, wiping what tears were left and heading in. The room was large and had a few separated areas for some privacy, but other than that, there was a bed and some chairs and a bunch of monitors and a fridge. That was it. I didn't mind it too much but, as I took off my mask and sat on the edge of the bed, I realized just how empty my life really was.

I had no living family now, no home other than the few places I stayed with L, no true friends, no parents, and I wouldn't even be able to visit my own father's grave until all this Kira stuff was over. I felt like that last lifeline that connected me to my old self was severed and nothing could fix it anymore. Like nothing could piece my life back together, because there was nothing left. I buried my face with my hand, elbow resting on my leg as I grit my teeth, my other arm lying on my knee, hand hanging down limply between my legs. More tears threatened to fall, but I held them back despite the anger, frustration, and sadness that swirled in my stomach and ripped away at my heart.

I had this overwhelming urge to hit something, just tear something to pieces and feel something other than this emotional pain eating me alive. I wanted to punch a brick wall until my hand fell limp and I thought about doing it. About just getting up and leaving to go beat the shit out of something or out of myself, and the more I thought about it, the more pleasing it sounded, until a voice tore me out of my depression.

"Kitsu, is everything alright?"

"Yeah…Everything's great." I muttered, a hand tugging on my earlobe as I stood up. "I just…forgot to do something. Sorry, L."

I headed towards the door, but was stopped by a hand on my wrist.

"You are a very poor liar, Kitsu." L said. "Your posture is tense, your voice is tight, you have only spent a short amount of time with Near, and you still have a habit of tugging on your earlobe when something upsets you." He pulled me back a bit, arms moving around me waist as he pressed his nose to the crook of my neck. "Please, Kitsu…Let me help you."

Tears welled up again and I could feel myself shaking slightly, causing L to tighten his grip as I struggled with what to do. L and I had gotten a bit closer these past couple years, despite everything that's been going on, even going so far as sleeping in the same bed together when the case allowed us to rest. We were going slow, not getting into anything extensive, but things like secrets and our pasts were still touchy subjects. It was hard for me to confide in him, just as it was hard for him to confide in me. There were the few occasions where he told me about himself and Watari or about his time at Wammy's, and I had told him about some of my time on the streets, but neither of us had brought up our parents and with what had just happened, it was understandable why I was hesitating in talking to L about it.

A choked sob escaped my lips, having not been able to hold everything back anymore as the tears finally fell and I brought a hand to my face.

"M-My father, he…he killed himself. Mello took him for the notebook a-and…"

I swiped furiously at the tears, feeling L lead me to the bed and sit me down, sitting beside me and just holding my hand that was fisted in the blankets.

"I don't even know why I'm this upset." I complained. "After mom died, all he ever did was hate me."

"It…is not my area of expertise, but perhaps your family bond is…something that was important to you but you did not notice it until now." L said, surprising me.

"You…"

"Did I say something wrong?" He asked, tilting his head curiously, making me chuckle imagining puppy ears on his head.

"Hehe, n-no. You said everything right."

I tackled L in a hug, knocking him back onto the bed as I dried my eyes on his shirt, his hand running through my hair with a sigh.

"You are far too much…emotion to handle, Kitsu."

"And you are far to smart for me to handle." I said with a grin, looking up at L and kissing him, before getting up and mock saluting. "Yosh! I have a mission to accomplish, Corporal! So I will see you after I have kicked Mello's arse!"

L shook his head with a small chuckle, standing up and stretching, before turning back to his computers.

"Try not to break him. We may still need his help."

"I will do my best, but no promises~" I said with a grin, turning around and heading outside to my motorcycle and getting on my way.

I'm not quite over my father's death, but perhaps I could put this anger to good use. After all, it's also possible that Kira killed him and made it look like a suicide. I frowned under my darkened helmet. Kira, you're going down.