I own nothing Twilight related I own the plot!
OK lovely people thanks for hanging with me. I hope you all had a wonderful Holiday period. I know it's been AGES since I last updated but like the rest of the world's population I have been CRAZY over the Holiday period but now I'm back :)
So for those still with me wow thanks so much. This chapter is over 4,500 words so hopefully it makes up for my absence :)
Enjoy.
Garret's words reached his ears but they didn't really register in his brain. Edward felt his heart seize with guilt but a tiny piece of him was relieved that Irina was dead. When Garret said that she had died at the scene of the car accident he hadn't even considered the baby until Bella and Kate cried out in thankfulness at his survival. Now he had considered the baby he had taken centre stage in his brain. Edward focused on Garret and said "Let's go Garret." That was it and it was all Garret needed to shift Bella's car into reverse and back out onto the street. He felt like he was going to puke with every breath that he took and felt even worse when Garret's deep voice sounded within the quiet car "We need to be prepared for what we find at the hospital. The officer I spoke to said that the baby was in a serious condition, I don't know what that means but it can't be good." Edward nodded but didn't speak; he thought he'd lose his lunch if he opened his mouth.
They reached the hospital and taking Edward's hand Bella squeezed, she couldn't speak because her emotions were all over the place and she didn't want to say the wrong thing, she figured just by touching him that Edward would realise she was there for him and loved him and when he squeezed back she knew he understood. Their quartet walked through the main entrance of Seattle General, all of them staring around them not knowing where to go first. A sign over a desk reading Administration drew them like magnets. A lovely blonde woman behind the desk smiled at them gently, a smile that was neither to bright and cheerful nor sad and pitying, her smile was friendly and reassuring but still it took her saying "Can I help you with anything?" in an almost confused way before any of them snapped out of their stupor enough to talk. Bella cleared her throat and said "Yes, hi, um we have to meet a Detective here. We received a call from him regarding an accident." The pretty woman's features clouded over and Bella knew that the woman behind the desk knew exactly what they were in for and she didn't envy them in the slightest but she remained professional and said "Of course, Detective Call just stepped away. He asked me to have you wait here for him and he said he apologises for the wait." All four of them nodded at the woman before they all muttered varying forms of a thank you before stepping to the side and waiting in a tense little circle for the police detective.
When the Detective arrived Edward stiffened when he recognised the Detective in charge of Bella's arson case, he hadn't put the name to the face. Detective Call hadn't seen them standing there waiting and had hurried up to the desk and spoken to the helpful admin worker who pointed surreptitiously in their direction. He had turned and the second his eyes fell on Edward a flash of recognition lit his features, he walked towards them and, shaking hands with them all, said "Sorry for your loss." And it was clear to Edward that the detective was trying to figure out the connection between Irina and the group before him. Sighing Edward said "Thank you. I know you're wondering what we have to do with this and the short story is Irina is an old girlfriend and the baby is my son." A small thrill deep in his chest had Edward almost smiling as he said those words but the gravity of the situation had it dying before it began. The detective nodded slowly before his eyes slid to Garret and Kate, he narrowed his eyes before saying "I take it that you are the lawyer I spoke to earlier." It wasn't a question so much as a statement and Garret nodded saying "Yes, I am and this lovely woman is my wife, Kate." Detective Call nodded and said "Okay now that I understand everyone's role in this little saga we can go forward." Edward nodded and said "Look can you please just tell us what happened."
Embry Call hated this part of his job. Telling loved ones that their family member was dead wasn't exactly a high point. The second he had seen Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan he was confused but figured out pretty quickly either Edward or the man, he assumed the other man was the lawyer he had first spoken to, was the father of the little boy lying in the NICU upstairs fighting for his life. He had been the first respondent on the scene of the crash and to say it had been brutal would have been an understatement and to have the baby survive was nothing short of a miracle. Taking a deep breath he briefly closed his eyes before saying "Ms Jenks was texting while driving and her vehicle veered into oncoming traffic and smashed head first into a semi. As I said before, and I apologise for saying it the way I did if I had've realised that you had a personal connection I would have broken the news gentler, she died at the scene. The passers by who phoned it in made certain that paramedics knew she was pregnant and they were on the scene within minutes. They moved her from the vehicle and there were still faint signs of life within her womb they performed a c-section and removed the child in order to keep him alive. Now if you'll follow me, Mr Cullen I will get you to identify the body, everyone else can wait in the corridor." He gestured for them all to follow him into an elevator and down to the morgue. He absolutely hated the morgue, it creeped him out so much that he avoided it as much as possible but in his line of duty there is still on so much delegation you can do. They reached the quiet lower floor of the hospital and Embry pointed to a bank of chairs against the wall "You folks can have a seat here and wait for us." He watched as Edward kissed Isabella tenderly saying "Bella it'll be fine, I promise. Remember I love you." Embry found this comment strange but didn't say anything, it wasn't his place. He turned away from the small group and, gesturing for Edward Cullen to follow him, he knocked on a non-descript steel door and waited for an answer, giving his name and badge number before the door was opened.
Edward followed the quietly observant detective into the viewing area of the hospitals morgue. He stood gawking at a room that wouldn't look out of place as a waiting room in a doctors' surgery. It wasn't what he expected at all, not that he knew what to expect but this wasn't it. A small greying man of indeterminate age came through a hidden door to their right and smiled sadly at them in what Edward figured was grief. He nodded at the detective and asked in a fatherly tone "Is this the family?" Edward wanted nothing more than to violently deny this but figured it opened up too many questions, so he stayed quiet as the detective nodded and said "Is she ready to be viewed?" the morgue attendant said "I think it would be better if she is viewed through the monitor, I've done as much as I can to prepare the body but" he shrugged eloquently and even though Edward didn't really understand that but when the detective nodded Edward figured that it was better for him if he only saw Irina through a monitor maybe it'd be less real or something. The morgue attendant gestured for them to follow him through the hidden door and taking a massive breath Edward followed them.
This room was more or less what Edward expected from a morgue. It was colder more sterile and there were pamphlets on grief and organ donation. A large glass window filled the majority of one wall while on another there was a flat screen monitor. The morgue attendant gestured toward the monitor then disappeared through a door Edward hadn't even noticed. A minute later the screen before him flashed and Irina's face, covered in cuts and bruising several places were stitched together, Edward felt bile rising in the back of his throat the burning got the better of him and he spun away a waste paper bin sitting in the corner of the room received the contents of his stomach. He heaved for a couple of minutes before collapsing against the wall. A hand on his shoulder had him looking up, the tears in his eyes from his vomiting jag blurring his vision, blinking them away he said "Detective, that is Irina, what happens now?" The detective shook his head and shrugged saying "Now we have a positive idea we complete the paper work, the investigation into the crash will continue and we'll let you know what the outcome of that is, you go up stairs and see to the paperwork pertaining to the baby she left behind." Edward felt another wave of nausea at the mention of the baby but he swallowed it down and just nodded. He stood on shaky legs and left the windowless room.
He fell out of the doorway and stumbled into the corridor, Garret reached him first and helped him right himself; Bella hovered with her hand covering her mouth and tears swimming in her eyes "Baby?" was all she asked and all Edward could do was nod letting them know that it was Irina lying on that cold slab. Bella nodded and said quietly "So what happens now?" Edward cleared his throat and said "The detective said that they will let us know how the investigation pans out and that we, I, now need to go upstairs and complete forms about the baby and go from there." He couldn't stand in the narrow corridor so close to Irina's dead body any longer so he just started walking towards the elevator, the others followed behind him quietly. It was Kate who pressed the button on the elevator when he realised he didn't know which level his child was on, he raised an eyebrow and Kate shuffled uncomfortably saying "I asked earlier. I figured, either way, that you wouldn't want to stop and ask the way to the baby so I asked for you." Edward sighed tiredly and said "Thanks heaps Kate, don't know what I'd do without you." He saw Bella stiffen slightly at his words but his brain told him to deal with that later, right at that moment there were other things that needed to be dealt with.
The elevator dinged and the doors slid wide revealing the birthing and maternity wing of Seattle General and their group of four just stood there gaping stupidly around. It wasn't until the doors started sliding closed that anyone moved then it was like lemmings they all filed out but none of them moving further away from the one in front. Bella glanced around at the place where she would more than likely be having her baby and she didn't really like what she saw. The hospital was immaculate but it was their colour scheme that was wearing on Bella's last, extremely raw, nerve. The walls were an apricot colour and the banisters on the walls were a creamy colour and it was entirely too girlie for her liking. Even the pictures on the walls of innocuous mothers and baby's had her wanting to rampage and tear the place apart and from the horrified look on Kate's face she was having the same urges. Sucking in deep breaths she grabbed Edward's hand and followed him down the long corridor, following the signage to the NICU. Garret broke the uneasy silence saying "What the hell does that stand for?" Bella felt herself chuckle silently as Kate gently wacked Garret's head and whispered "Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit, Garret, honestly you'd think that for someone as clever as you that would've been easy to figure out." Garret frowned, rolled his eyes but said nothing as Edward pushed the buzzer on the door. A static-filled female voice said "NICU, how can I help you?" Bella could see the panic bombard Edward and she leant across him and said "Yes we were told to come up here by Detective Call." There was a short pause before the female voice was replaced by a male voice who said "Yes, we were told that you would be here. I'm sorry but there can be only two visitors at a time. Someone will be there in a second to open the door and walk you through our procedures." Bella glanced over her shoulder at the couple behind her, her gaze met Kate's and an unspoken agreement passed between them.
Barely thirty seconds passed before the door to the NICU swished open and an extremely tall man with a stethoscope around his neck stepped into the doorway, pulling off a disposable smock, he smiled and holding out his hand said "Howdy, I'm Doctor Sailor and I am the lead Doctor on this case." He shook all of their hands and Edward felt a wave of reassurance flow through him, the only other person he knew that gave him an instant feeling of being at ease (other than Bella) was Jasper and Edward didn't know if it was because the Doctor had the same Texas drawl that Jasper had or if it was something else. The Doctor smiled again as he said "Mr Cullen, I have read many a good thing about you. I am pleased to finally meet you, though I wish it were under better circumstances. Mrs Cullen, nice to meet you as well and who are your friends?" Edward didn't bother correcting the Doctor's assumption that Bella was his wife because if he had his way she would be and very soon. Edward loved that she blushed so prettily at being addressed as Mrs Cullen and felt his chest puff out a little as he introduced their group. "This is my Bella" he said hugging Bella with one arm "and these are our friends Kate and Garret Brown." A chorus of 'pleased to meet you' and 'likewise' sounded in the tiny corridor. Doctor Sailor smiled again and said "Now as head of the NICU I would like to guarantee you that your son is receiving the highest level of care available and he is actually doing very well. Our visiting policy is two at a time; we do however have a small waiting room just within the doors so if y'all could follow me we'll talk more in there." They all followed the friendly Doc through the large metal door into a small waiting room with a half a dozen chairs, a small table, a pamphlet stand and numerous posters on hygiene and proper procedure for dealing with the NICU graced two walls the third wall was covered in hundreds of pictures of babies and thank you cards. These drew Edward's attention more than anything else in the room. He sat heavily into one of the chairs and drew Bella onto his lap; this drew another sunny smile from the Doctor except this one fled quickly when he started speaking. "Now I need to let you know about your son. He is a very sick little boy and before we go any further I need to impress on you that you're has only a twenty-five percent chance at the moment." Edward heard a gasp of disbelief and was stunned to discover it had come from him. Swallowing hard he nodded for the Doctor to continue. "This little boy is a fighter and he is fighting very hard. He was born with a Congenital Heart Defect or what we refer to as CHD and he was also born addicted to methamphetamines. The addiction is, obviously, from the drugs his mother was pumping into her body. Now either of these things, separately, is life threatening but together and added to the fact that he is severely underweight and almost five weeks early puts a greater strain on his tiny body. Doctor Zaheer wants to operate on and repair the hole in his heart. Now was it you or his mother with the congenital defect?" Edward could hear his blood pumping through his veins as the Doctor spoke about his fragile son and he knew that if Irina wasn't already dead he'd want her dead for what she had done to their son. He couldn't understand how someone could put their rush above the wellbeing of their unborn child. Bella's soft squeeze on his hand drew his focus back to the doctor and he said "Um, I don't know of any such defect on my side, so he probably inherited it from his mother." The doctor nodded and then said "Ok now we've gotten the heavy talk out of the way, have you thought of a name for the little one?"
It was a simple question but one that threw her for a loop. She hadn't even considered the name Edward would like to give his son and by the stupefied look on Edward's face neither had he. The exceptionally pleasant doctor laughed gently; lightly rubbing her knee he said "I can tell by the stunned looks on all of your faces that a name for the little tyke was the furthest thing from your mind. How about we let you both through, you can get a look at him and maybe a name will pick itself. It happens like that sometimes, trust me." He stood and Bella scrambled to get off Edward's lap so they could follow him. Garret and Kate just smiled as they trailed the Doc through another sliding door. In this little room there was a large automatic sink, seriously you put you hands under one spot and soap comes out then you move down the line and water comes out, they donned the unattractive smocks and little blue booties Bella struggled with hers enough that the doctor laughed at her gently and helped her get the booties on her feet. They scrubbed their hands before putting on the sterile masks and going through another sliding door.
The room they entered was like nothing either of them had seen before. It was as busy as any ER on a Saturday night and there were all types of noises and sirens. Doctor Sailor bypassed the closest cribs and Bella noticed that Edward refused to look at the tiny lives inside those cribs. They paused in front of a large desk were several female nurses and two male nurses were completing shift change over. "These are Baby Jenks' parents, Mr and Mrs Cullen." Bella felt awkward at being introduced as such considering she wasn't anything to the tiny baby they were about to see and the fact that she was still obviously pregnant was drawing a few raised eyebrows but she didn't have the heart to go into the confusion yet. A chorus of 'hello's' met this statement before the Doc was on the move again. He bypassed several more cribs before stopping at a crib nearest the nurse's station and the minute Bella looked into that crib she lost her heart.
Edward felt hot tears cascade down his face as he laid eyes on the tiny frame of his son and in that instant he loved that child fiercely. He drifted closer to the enclosed humidicrib and touched the side reverently. This close to the baby he could see his tiny head covered in a blue cap and his fragile little body covered in wires and tubes; Edward watched as his sons' chest rose with a breath that seemed to big for his miniature lungs. Edward blinked the tears from his eyes and sought Bella; she was standing at the end of the crib, one hand brushing free flowing tears from her face while the other caressed the bump of their child. She wasn't looking at him she was to intent on the tiny human inside the fish tank-like environment and the wonder in her eyes had Edward's heart swelling. A nurse walked up to them and introduced himself as Paul and reassured them that the baby had been holding his own since they had brought him in. Edward felt his throat tighten as the nurse continued to tell them about the surgery scheduled to fix his tiny heart and in an emotion-rough voice Edward asked "Is he strong enough for that? I mean, I know he needs it and we want him to get better but he is so tiny and fragile. I hate to think of him being put through that." Paul smiled softly and said "Compared to the pain he would be feeling if we left him the surgery is minimal and Doctor Zaheer is the best in the country and he has high hopes for this little one. Um, speaking of the little one have you thought of a name yet?" Edward felt a spark of annoyance at once again being asked if they had thought of a name for the child he had just found out was his; taking a deep breath he said "No, not yet. We'll need to discuss it, don't wanna lump the kid with a name that wont suit him, ya know." This answer seemed to satisfy the nurse who nodded, fiddled with some more wires and wrote more notes in the chart at the end of the cot before walking away. Edward turned towards Bella, who had sunk into one of the two chairs beside the cot, he wanted to say something, anything, but he was at a loss.
Bella watched transfixed as the nurse spoke to Edward, she wasn't really listening she was too focused on the little boy that was now her son, well as good as. She wasn't planning on leaving Edward anytime soon; she loved him with all of her heart. She hadn't thought that she would feel much other than sympathy for the little boy whose mother had just died almost taking him with her but the second she had seen him she had seen a miniature Edward and her heart had been stolen all over again and she wanted nothing more than to protect and love this baby; the same feeling she'd had when she'd realised that Irina had been a drug user. She sunk into the nearest chair and stared at her baby while half-listening to the schedule for the surgery, she just wanted to touch him and let him know that she was there.
She felt Edward's gaze but she couldn't force herself to move her eyes. She sighed as he sat beside her and she held out her hand for him to take and wasn't surprised when he pulled it up to his lips and kissed her fingers. She smiled and glanced lovingly at him before looking back to the baby. Edward's voice interrupted her staring "Bella, I know this is difficult for you; especially since, well since the frigging beginning. I'm sorry baby and I'd understand if you need time." At his words Bella felt a deep anger well inside her. Still, after everything they had been through, he was trying to get rid of her. Huffing out an annoyed breath she swivelled in her chair and said "Edward do you want me here?" He looked startled at her question and he opened and shut his mouth, imitating a fish, before stuttering "I do, but, it's, and you know. I mean with the baby, and he isn't yours. I don't want." Before closing his eyes taking a deep breath to steady him self and saying "Yes I want you, I have always wanted you. I just don't want you being trapped." She raised a hand and cut him off "I knew what I was signing on for, okay maybe not, but I stuck around because I love you."
Edward believed that she wanted to mean everything she said but it wasn't until she said 'I love you' that Edward understood that she actually meant them and she wasn't saying them to make him feel better. He leant forward and kissed her gently on the mouth "I love you too Bella, forever." It was the first time they had said that to one another and a part of Edward wished that it was said at another time and in another place but saying it here seemed the right place and time as well. Never in his adult life had Edward told a woman he loved them. He knew how he felt about Bella but he'd never actually told her; 'I love you' was the last thing his mother had told his father and Edward figured that it was because of that that he had panicked at the slightest thought of telling someone that he loved them but Bella had made him stronger and he realised that even if you lost someone the love you felt for them didn't go away. The smile that lit her face at his words made him forget that it probably was a bad time to finally tell her. She leapt from her chair and threw herself on him, kissing his face and hugging him tightly against her. He laughed gently and said again "Love you Bella. I will love you forever, you are my life and I will do anything for you." She kissed him gently and whispered "I love you too Edward and I feel the same way but at the moment we should really concentrate on the lil fella and help him get better so he can come home with us." A weight Edward hadn't realised he had been carrying over his son, since finding out the child was his, lifted at Bella's words and he kissed her again saying "Do you mean that Bella? I mean really mean it?" Bella nodded and said "Yeah I do mean it. How could I not? He looks exactly like you; check out that hair." Edward smiled down into the humidicrib and noticed that his tiny son had his auburn hair and it made his heart leap in joy. "Hey, Bella, um what should we name him?"
Bella felt her smile slip a little as Edward asked what they should name his son and she felt a slight tug at her heart at the hesitant way he asked and she couldn't help but think of the name she had wanted to call their baby if it was a boy. They had both discovered that they were both massive fans of the motorcycle TV show Sons of Anarchy and she had been toying with the idea of suggesting Jackson as their sons' name; now as she looked down into that tiny humidicrib she felt that this little boy was a Jackson, she wasn't sure if she could explain that better so instead of trying she simply said "I wanted to name our baby Jackson Carlisle Cullen if it was a boy but now we have a son I think it would be nice, what do you think?" Edward had smiled the second she had said the name and sat there repeating it over and over again before saying "Yeah I like it. It's strong and he survived a CHD. Yeah Bella, it's an awesome name. Are you sure you don't mind giving it to this little man and not keeping it to name our child with if it's a boy?" Bella smiled and shook her head "He is our son Edward and that is his name."
Now I know some of you are probably annoyed/concerned that Bella & Edward are keeping the baby but let's face it it's fiction & Edward had millions of dollars and Bella can get all the help she'll need.
There isn't a person alive who could look at a baby in a humidicrib and not lose their heart. It's a heart breaking sight and it makes you grateful for the little things.
Please review I love hearing how you feel about the story and the direction it's heading in :)
Cherie
xx
