garth's damn swimming pit
fable II
Sparrow, Garth, Hammer, Theresa, Dog

*Note that I took some creative leeway with this particular cave-thing. Mostly because I didn't feel like making this seem too walkthroughish, or what have you.


"Ahhh fuuuuuuc-"

Sparrow found his explitive cut off by a rush of cold, stale water flooding his nose and mouth. Disoriented, he allowed himself to sink to the bottom, blinking at the murky nothingness he currently found himself in. Of the many things he'd been expecting to hit at the end of his oh so graceful fall, a pond was not one of them. Spikes? Yes. Bits of the railing he'd realized were missing just a tad too late? Most definitely. Garth's super secret swimming pool? Hell no.

His disbelief was cut short by his lungs' need for air, bringing him back to reality and forcing him to propel himself upwards as fast as possible. He broke the surface with just as much dignity as a cat thrown into a bathtub, splashing and gasping as he tried to tread water and peel his hair out of his eyes.

Another splash, not of his own doing, threw him off for a moment, almost sending him back under. "Gah, damn it fluffnugget! Trying not to die here!" The dog snorted, paddling away. "Hey, get back here! Don't leave me you bloody mongrel, you know me and swimming don't get along!" The dog ignored him. Grumbling, he splash swam after his furry deserter, hoping Garth's pool wasn't ginormus and full of weird monsters.

His feet hit bottom, and he stumbled forward, half crawling onto the bank his dog was currently spraying with shaken off water. On hands and knees, gasping and spitting out water, Sparrow turned to throw an evil glare at the mutt. "Thanks a lot boy, you were a big help in keeping me from bloody drowning." The dog rolled his eyes as if to say, 'I found you dry land, didn't I?' Which made the sopping gypsy huff indignantly. Damn smartass dog.

Pulling himself to his feet, Sparrow squinted into the darkness. "Is it just me, or is my ninja lamp broken?" He glanced to the dog, who cocked his head. He shrugged. "Oh well. It's not like I haven't fallen off one ledge already today…" Pulling his soaked clothes back into sorts, Sparrow glanced back up the way they'd come. "Guess we aren't going back that way." With a sigh, he trudged forward into the darkness.

-back on brightwall tower's porch-

"Bloody hell Garth, you think he's all right?"

The mage surveyed the area below them. "I'm not sure. I don't see him, so we should assume he fell into that." He pointed to an odd structure directly below the hole in the railing.

Hammer squinted at it. "It's too dark to see anything…Do you know what's in there?"

He shook his head. "No. To be honest, I never really paid it much attention. There was never an obvious way to get in there, so I assumed it was purely for decorative purposes."

"Decorative purposes. Garth, you live in a castle, since when do castles have decorations? I thought the whole point of them was to defend whoever was holed up inside."

"If you hadn't noticed, the courtyard is full of decorations, albeit some less intact than others."

Hammer glanced around. "Right, well, how do we get him out?"

"I haven't a clue. Come; let's make our way down there."

Sighing, Hammer followed after the mage. "Bloody git, I told him one day his inability to pay attention would get the best of him."

-back in the decorative well, cave, thing-

"Shit!" Sparrow watched the rocks tumble down into the void he'd nearly stepped off into. He glanced back at fluffnugget, who had his master's pants clamped firmly in his muzzle. "Glad one of us can see where the hell he's going. Thanks boy." He stepped back from the edge far enough for the dog to feel safe letting go. "How about you lead the way?" In response, the dog turned about and set off, forcing his master to hustle to keep up.

It was stupidly dark, and without his magic ninja lamp to light his way, Sparrow couldn't tell his asshole from his elbow. He was going to have to have a talk with Theresa when he found his way back about why the damn thing wasn't water proof.

"Doesn't this place ever end? We've been walking for ages and I'm tired and-gah, damn, fluffnugget, why'd you stop?"

The mutt barked, jumping up to signal he'd found something. Blinking, Sparrow looked up from the furry back he'd been staring at religiously for who knows how long. In front of them was a softly glowing yellow orb. "Huh, when did that get here? And more importantly, why are Garth's weird wizard pool toys all the way in here?"

A nudge at his thigh made him jump, a furry face and a lolling tongue meeting his gaze in its search for monsters. "Is it give Sparrow a heart attack day?" The dog barked, again bumping his snout against the gun holster strapped to his master's leg. He looked between the gun and the yellow orb more than a few times before a candle flickered to life in his brain. "Oooooooh, that's one of those, uhm, things. That Theresa had in the guild cave when she first threw us down that hole. What were they called?" Fluffnugget barked. "Right, of course! Woofs!" And with a cheery grin, Sparrow shot it.

The 'woof' twirled over itself before shooting off down another dark corridor. Without missing a beat, Sparrow scrambled after it, glad for the sudden light it let off. "Come on fluffers, the light of the woof will keep us safe!"

The assurance was quickly proved faulty as the ground rose up and stabbed him in the thigh.

With a screech Sparrow stumbled backwards, landing on his ass and clutching his wound. "What's the big idea?" He glowered at the woof, which was ignoring him as it trekked across the cavern. He watched it pause, then nestle itself in a small stone pillar that also looked vaguely familiar to his affronted mind. Before he could complain about the loss of light, shelves lined with candles lit up as if by magic.

He momentarily ignored the gloating candles, gaze darting to the floor in search of the thing that had stabbed him. Before him were littered numerous holes in the rock, far too properly made to be anything natural. He sucked a breath in, pulling fluffnugget to his side and pointing to the general area before them. "Look boy, Theresa was wrong! The Mole People do exist!"

Fluffnugget gave his master his patented 'are you kidding me right now?' look.

Sparrow patted the mutt on the head. "Don't worry boy, they won't hurt us. Look how small the holes are! I can take them." Springing to his feet, he stepped lightly back onto the holey platform.

Not five seconds later he was back where he started, on his ass, clutching his other now bleeding thigh and cursing colorfully at the spikes receding back into their respective holes.

"Not a word, mutt, not a damned word."

Picking up a rock, he chucked it off into the field of perforated squares. He watched moodily as rock bounced off rock. He blinked. No spikes had leapt upward to lay the hurt down on the rock. He grabbed another, tossing it towards the spattering of blood he'd left behind. A grin spread across his face as the spikes yet again leapt upwards at the intrusion of their space. "I, have an idea."

Xx

A handful of rocks, three rats and what he assumed were probably the femurs of some unlucky idiot, and Sparrow had managed to map out a safe path across the room. Following said winding path drew him level with the candles, the pattern of them catching his eye. It looked oddly familiar….

"Well fuck."

It took only two glances to affirm that yes, the candles where in fact telling him the safe path, of which he'd spent a half hour figuring out on his own. He pointed at the smug looking mutt at his feet. "Not a word."

Xxx

More spikes and some peculiar statues later (of which he found, much to his amusement, he had to make faces at to defeat) Sparrow was growing bored. Caves were fun and all, but he hadn't been planning on spelunking that particular day. Not to mention his ninja lamp was still on the fritz. And he smelled musty, his clothes still damp from earlier. He didn't even want to be able to see all the nasty things clinging to his wet self.

"Does this damn cave ever end? I think we need to have a serious talk with Garth when we get back about good places for swimming pools and how this definitely isn't one of them."

Fluffnugget yipped in agreement.

-back in Brightwood near the accursed well-

"SPARROW!"

"Enough Hammer. If he didn't hear you the first three times I highly doubt continuing in this manner would be worthwhile."

She pulled herself back from the lip of the qwll, glancing at Garth and blinking at the sight of the mage covering his ears. "How deep do you think this thing is? I can't see the bottom."

Garth rubbed his chin, looking the thing over. "It's hard to say. Here, hand me a small piece of rock from over there, if you would." He held up his fingers to define small.

"Ok, but what are you-"

He dropped the stone down into the well, leaning over and waiting to hear it hit. Far too long later for his liking, he heard a small splash.

"Was that?"

"Water, yes. There must be an underground pond or lake of some sort."

"You don't think.." Hammer's eyes grew large as the implications dawned on her.

"I'm sure he's fine. Perhaps we should alert Theresa, and see if she can get into contact with him just to make sure."

Hammer nodded, pulling out the trinket that functioned like a guild seal both she and Garth possessed. "Do you think we'll have to go get him?"

Garth frowned. "Sparrow can take care of himself. I'm sure he's off trying to find a way out now as we speak."

-back in the cave thing-

"Sparrow? Can you hear me?"

"Course I can hear you. Especially with the way this cave reflects sounds. Good god, I'm surprised you can't hear yourself!"

"Ah, I'm glad to hear you in good spirits. Hammer and Garth informed me of your…accident. They are worried about you, Hero."

Sparrow snorted. "What, you didn't know? Did you finally find a new hobby that doesn't involve spying on me?"

"Sparrow-"

"Tell 'em I'm fine. Mostly. I did get stabbed by the mole people…oh, and I almost drowned…well, and then there were those incidents with the cliffs. And the cages. And the sentient statues….but other than that, and the smell and the dark, I'm perfectly fine! Which reminds me, you should have told me my ninja lamp wasn't water proof. Cause no-ow it's busted."

Silence.

"Theresa? There-sa!"

-back at Brightwood tower-

Both Hammer and Garth were frowning, Hammer having gone somewhat pale. "This is all my fault, I should have grabbed him!"

"Theresa, did he say how far he'd been walking, and in what direction?"

"No Garth, however even if he had I wouldn't have suggested trying to track his movements. Sparrow is many things, but skilled at underground navigation is not one of them. Stay where you are, I will contact you should he need your immediate attention. Until then, do not fret. In time, I'm sure he will resurface."

Hammer stuffed her seal away. "Well that was helpful. Should we listen to her Garth? I mean, from the sounds of it, Sparrow could use our help and-"

"No, Hammer, I think Theresa is right. All we can do right now is wait for him to return. At this point it's very unlikely we'd be able to find him anyway."

Crossing her arms and huffing, Hammer sat on a boulder near her. "Fine. But if he needs us, don't think I won't throw you down there."

"There was no doubt in my mind that you would."