I haven't slept for days. More than I can count. Or maybe I've only been in here for a few hours, I have no idea. Time moves much differently in the Vault of Glass than it does... Than it does back on the surface.
I glanced upwards, squinting against the bright light shining down from the ceiling of my room-like cell. The Vex have trapped me here and kept me alive this long, to which I still don't know why. I've been in here for longer than I could ever imagine. The silence is a psychological weapon, damaging me right where I can trust myself the most. My own mind.
I wouldn't wish this solitary torture upon anybody, my greatest enemy or the Vex themselves. The silence, the walls on all sides, and being 160 million miles away from the place you call home... Well, the place you once called home... It's too much for anyone to handle. Too much for me to handle.
I clenched my teeth together, looking down at the ancient, chipped floor.
I've done everything I can to try and escape. I've screamed for Kabr and Pahanin, I've tried the receiver, and I've asked my Ghost to try and make contact with Pahanin's Ghost. And when I lost my voice and realized help wasn't coming, I used my Solar Light and tried to burn my way out.
From the corner of my eye I saw the giant brass door to my cell, burned almost a pitch black at the center.
I let out a sigh, one that rattled my weakened body and left me slow to gather another breath. I think I'm dying. I've been deteriorating for years but now I can really feel it. I—
I broke out in a coughing fit, proving my point. I arched my back and coughed, long and hard, even having to take a second to catch my breath. I wasn't used to coughing like this. Guardians don't get sick. But I wasn't sick, I was dying. The Darkness of the Vault has been draining my Light for years, I only have so much left of it. Once it's gone it won't be long until I'm dead. But this was going to happen at any time whether I was trapped or not.
Kabr, the Fireteam leader of my Fireteam, suddenly found his way into my thoughts. If he was trapped then he didn't have long either. He drank Radiolaria, a highly toxic fluid found inside Vex chassis. Who knows, he's probably already dead.
And Pahanin, I can't imagine he'd live long imprisoned either. He's already gone crazy, it would just get worse if he was all alone.
I dropped down off the small rounded structure in the center of the room and laid flat on the floor. Part of me hoped my Ghost would come out to talk with me. She doesn't talk to me much anymore though. I'm not sure why but I can understand completely why she doesn't talk with me.
I turned my head to one side as I laid it against the floor, closing my eyes and slowing my breathing. Sometimes I can feel vibrations through the floor. Nothing serious, just small things, Vex living out their lives doing what they're designed to do. Unlike me, trapped in a room and unable to do anything he was designed to do. And who has no help coming for him.
My Fireteam either died, were trapped like I was, or escaped. I like to think they were killed and their suffering ended. It would only hurt me more to find out they were trapped like I was. And as much as I hope for the third option, I know there's no way to escape the Vault—at least no way that we figured out—and the chances of them escaping were slim. Up there they still have to face the Templar and its impregnable shields.
I breathed in and out slowly. Once again the thoughts of my Fireteam and the Templar are bringing back memories, bad memories. I thought about what happened the last few years, things I couldn't change and things I regret. So much regret. But besides that I thought of the Fireteam I was with. A Titan, Kabr, and a Hunter, Pahanin. Two of the greatest Guardians I think I've ever gotten the chance to meet, honestly. Two Guardians that deserved much better than me as their teammate.
I smiled as I thought of them but my smile faded quickly.
The last time I saw them felt just like... Just like moments ago. I still remember seeing Kabr and Pahanin running away, thinking I was following, only for the Darkness of the Vault to hold me as they were distracted. It's hard for me to realize that that's probably the last time I'll see either of them. I'll never know if they made it out alive or perished. All I'll know is that I'm trapped deep below the surface of Venus, somewhere well-hidden that no one will even think to look for me.
If anyone still remembers me...
The feeling of tiredness began to grip my body, gently lulling me to sleep. I blinked and tensed my arms, releasing several flashes of Solar Light.
It's the guilt. This was all my fault. Sure, it probably wasn't my idea to enter the Vault in the first place but it was my choice and my idea to lead my Fireteam further inside. If we had stayed, found a way around... We could be out of the Vault of Glass, all three of us.
It was hard to imagine it: the three of us anywhere but the Vault of Glass. Partially because I have no idea what either of them did at the Tower. The Vault erased us from time, even erasing our memories from each other. Although saying that, I always think that Pahanin, if he was back at the Tower, would be the one to purposely or non-purposely get into trouble.
I half laughed, half coughed at the thought of it. Pahanin sure did get into some trouble in the last four years. With "the voices" talking to him in his mind I don't find it hard to see why he did get into a lot of trouble.
And Kabr... I can't see him as anyone else than a leader. If all three of us got back to the Tower and decided to stay as a team, I think we'd—
No... I closed my eyes, the air in the Vault of Glass feeling much heavier, much more compacted.
At that time, back before I made up the vision, we wouldn't have wanted anything to do with each other. How could I blame them? All of our memories had been erased, not general feelings towards one another, but are memories had still been erased. We barely knew each other, so leaving the Vault wouldn't have kept us together. At that time we didn't spend four years struggling together, in pain, wondering about the world back home... We would never have become what I consider close friends.
But at the same time...
I lowered my head, pressure forming all along my head and back as I held in my emotion.
Pahanin wouldn't have lost his mind. If we didn't travel deeper he would've been fine. He wouldn't've started talking to himself or following "the voices." And... If I had done more I could've stopped Kabr from hitting him, making it all worse.
More guilt, more wanting to take it all back.
And Kabr... If I hadn't made that stupid vision up, he wouldn't have had a reason to try and understand the Vault. He wouldn't have drank Radiolaria or even thought about forging the Aegis. He'd be alive...
Vwish. Tap, tap.
I felt the vibrations through the floor, strangely close, almost as if they were footsteps...
I pushed myself up faster than I think I ever have before then saw something that made my heart skip a beat.
There was an Exo woman with piercing blue eyes and a brown cloak over her shoulders standing across the room from me. I stared at her with wide eyes, almost shaking. To me she was the most beautiful thing I think I've ever seen—and not because of appearance. She was beautiful to me because she's someone new, someone unexpected, someone who found me.
Immediately my desperate mind jumped to conclusions. She's here to save me, she has to be!
I couldn't believe it. Help has always been on it's way!
